Ruan Shujin looked at Li Yinglan, her heart softening. She patted Li Yinglan’s hand like she was comforting a child.
Li Yinglan held onto Ruan Shujin’s hand.
“After that, Cheng Xinfeng only sent money and never returned. I couldn’t read much, so he would draw pictures and ask if I was alright. I was fine. Once I had Minwa, I had a reason to live.”
“Later, I don’t know what happened to him, but he became more reckless, contracted a venereal disease, and with his poor health, Old Master Cheng’s heart turned cruel. I had no way to resist the others. In that place, neither village nor town to turn to, I couldn’t even ask for help. Before he left, it seemed like he had one last bright moment.”
“He prepared money and luggage for me, and letters from Cheng Xinfeng, urging me to leave quickly.”
“The Cheng family had no patience. When he died, they didn’t follow proper funeral rites, just buried him. As expected, they drove us, an orphan and a widow, out. My maternal family treated me like a pariah, but I never intended to return anyway.”
“I took Minwa and the package Brother Cheng prepared and headed straight for Hushi.”
Li Yinglan covered her face.
“Sometimes I hate him, sometimes I feel pity. He was also educated, a family hope—but after seeing what Old Master Cheng did, he seemed to go mad and was never well again.”
As she spoke, her emotions grew heated.
Ruan Shujin held her hand, taking no other action, simply listening patiently.
“Ah Jin, why do some parents use their children to vent their desires? Sometimes, in years of famine, children even became food.”
“I don’t understand. I really don’t understand.”
Ruan Shujin understood Li Yinglan. In vast China, spanning thousands of kilometers, some policies could not reach every inch of land due to poor transportation.
Thus, some local customs were unbearable.
Li Yinglan suddenly sat up.
“But I still don’t fully know what happened. Our place was small, and some people liked to gawk. I heard the elders talk about the Cheng family, but they wouldn’t tell children. When I grew up, being a Cheng, no one told me either.”
Ruan Shujin hugged her knees and watched Li Yinglan.
“Sister Yinglan, it’s all in the past. Now that you’ve left that place, the sky is wide, the earth is vast—you have your own life to live.”
“Cheng Xinfeng, since he wanted to take you away, surely he has feelings for you. Perhaps this is your fated connection.”
Ruan Shujin looked at Li Yinglan.
“Few people are truly lucky. Most face hardships. But we can’t stay stagnant. Step forward boldly.”
Ruan Shujin leaned on Li Yinglan’s shoulder.
“Sister Yinglan, my parents weren’t very good either. But I’m luckier than you—I had a loving grandfather and money. I made mistakes before and paid dearly. So now, I don’t want to live for anyone else. I’m only twenty. I’m still young. I want to live for myself, and you should live for yourself too.”
“You’re saying all this, and I hear you. I see that you have feelings for Cheng Xinfeng—you just can’t accept yourself.”
Ruan Shujin cupped Li Yinglan’s face.
“A woman’s purity is in her heart, not in her body.”
Li Yinglan suddenly smiled, then cried as she smiled.
Ruan Shujin wiped her tears.
“After all, you are the one who’s been hurt. No one asked if you agreed. They treated you like a commodity. But our Li Yinglan is kind-hearted.”
“So, you didn’t choose to leave with Cheng Xinfeng. Brother Cheng, for you, was the one who saved you. His harm to you can’t outweigh the help he gave you.”
Li Yinglan’s shoulders shook, then gradually calmed. Tears glistened, her lips trembling.
“Ah Jin, you understand me.”
“My biological parents were far worse than you can imagine. I was the eldest, a girl, and I couldn’t compete with a stranger as a daughter-in-law… Brother Cheng saved me. Even if life wasn’t perfect, my resentment has three parts, gratitude six parts, and the remaining one part is mine—fear. In our place, women couldn’t remarry. They had to uphold the purity plaque for life. Widows who remarried would be criticized or, in severe cases, drowned in pig cages.”
“I overthought everything, so my mind was constantly occupied.”
Ruan Shujin tapped Li Yinglan’s forehead.
“Then stop overthinking. Go back to the first question—do you want to marry him?”
Ruan Shujin asked, and Li Yinglan nodded eagerly.
Li Yinglan felt a bit shy under Ruan Shujin’s gaze and touched her own face.
Ruan Shujin helped Li Yinglan lie down.
“Then tell him to submit the marriage application. You can’t give up what you want to do now just because of what might happen later. Besides, in your hometown, neither of you would want to go back.”
“When you’re settled, you can move Brother Cheng’s grave later. It will be easier to visit him.”
Li Yinglan looked at Ruan Shujin.
“Ah Jin, you really read my mind! You know what I’m thinking!”
Ruan Shujin patted the bed.
“Alright, stop worrying. Sleep now. Tomorrow we’ll go to the hospital to check on the sister who gave birth. If today goes smoothly, she should be okay.”
“But it’s dangerous. She gave birth on the train. I forgot to ask how far along the child was.”
Li Yinglan thought of the two tiny babies.
“From my experience with so many births, those children were probably premature.”
As they talked, they fell asleep.
The next morning, Ruan Shujin woke to find Li Yinglan still asleep. She glanced at the time and stared at the ceiling, lost in thought.
Finally, she carefully got out of bed.
Sister Yinglan must have released her inner tension, sleeping deeply.
Ruan Shujin finished tidying up and noticed Li Yinglan still sleeping, holding a newspaper, though she had already entered her inner space.
These days had been busy, and because of the travel, Ruan Shujin hadn’t checked in often.
Now, seeing the vibrant life inside, she felt truly happy.
Ruan Shujin usually came to the space to check vegetables, chickens, ducks, geese, cows, sheep, and dogs—or to look at her money.
Honestly, at first, she visited frequently, afraid her precious boxes might vanish.
After all, as a woman, without money, she would be helpless.
Exiting the space, Ruan Shujin heard faint sounds outside, slowed her pace, and peeked through the door.
She saw Xie Zheng and Cheng Xinfeng.
“Sister Yinglan is still sleeping. Let’s not disturb her. Let’s eat first, then bring her some later. How about that?”
Xie Zheng nodded, one hand nudging Cheng Xinfeng, the other gesturing to Ruan Shujin.
In a quieter voice, he said:
“Follow the leader’s arrangement.”