An inexplicable sweetness blossomed in Zheng Xiangyi’s heart. She suddenly realized that the ever-dignified and stern Emperor could also show such an awkward side, as if a deity had descended from the clouds just to reveal a rarely seen flaw in front of her.
It was not just joy, but a hidden sense of pride that quietly spread.
She deliberately frowned, feigning distress as she looked at the array of fabrics in the basket, muttering, “What should I do… I don’t even know what color Your Majesty likes…”
The Emperor remained seated in silence, his posture steady as a mountain. Yet, with a furtive glance, Zheng Xiangyi caught a faint trace of pink tingeing the tips of his ears.
“Your Majesty…” Her voice was soft, almost dripping with sweetness, as she tugged persistently at his sleeve and swayed it gently. “Tell me, what color do you like?”
Feng Jue’s body stiffened, his seated posture unwavering. Seeing his silence, Zheng Xiangyi let out a light humph and, emboldened, wrapped her entire body around him like a pliant vine, clinging to his arm.
“Your Majesty, don’t you really want it? If you don’t say anything, how am I supposed to know what’s on your mind? Or… are you just too embarrassed to say it?”
Her stubborn nature flared up again. Her bright eyes fixed on him, demanding that he admit it aloud.
Feng Jue felt the warm, soft body clinging to his arm like a pampered kitten, and an inexplicable restlessness flickered like a small flame in his heart. He pursed his lips tighter, refusing to speak.
“Your Majesty!” Zheng Xiangyi pouted, tilting her little face upward to gaze directly into his eyes.
Feng Jue lowered his eyelashes slightly, his voice almost inaudible. “This is most improper.”
Yet, Zheng Xiangyi sensed almost immediately the tension easing from his body. He did not push her away, nor did he deny her actions. It was almost as if he tacitly permitted her boldness, silently indulging this closeness.
“That’s all because Your Majesty spoils me!” Zheng Xiangyi gave another light humph, then turned to pick out a piece of cyan silk she had long admired from the basket and presented it before him. “Take a look. Does this color suit you?”
Feng Jue’s gaze fell upon the cyan fabric. He gave a slight nod, his tone still reserved. “Acceptable.”
“I knew you’d like it.” Zheng Xiangyi smiled radiantly. She had always felt that no color suited the Emperor better than cyan.
He was like jade among piled stones, like verdant pines—clear, noble, bright, and peerlessly handsome. Even if he were not the Emperor, he would still be a distinguished gentleman renowned throughout the land. A single smile from him would be enough to make one’s heart flutter uncontrollably.
Zheng Xiangyi gazed almost greedily at his stern profile. Though Feng Yu bore some resemblance to him in appearance, he lacked the warmth and depth that only years of experience could temper—a depth like that of a serene, unfathomable pool. She could never tire of looking at him.
Feng Jue helplessly lowered his gaze and asked softly, “Have you looked your fill?”
“Not at all!” Zheng Xiangyi shook her head with righteous indignation. “I’ll never get tired of looking! Is Your Majesty going to control even this?”
In her past life, after His Majesty passed away, she could only gaze at Feng Yu’s face—a face similar to his but far inferior. She truly didn’t know how she had endured those four years after his departure.
Feng Jue chuckled. “What proper young lady stares at a man’s face all day long?”
“Because Your Majesty is handsome.” Zheng Xiangyi spoke candidly, not hiding her admiration in the slightest. “I’ve never seen a man more handsome than Your Majesty. Besides, I already call you ‘Father.’ What’s wrong with letting me look?”
It’s perfectly normal for a daughter to want to be close to her father!
Feng Jue was rendered speechless by her boldness, his face flushing with warmth. When had Xiangyi become so audacious, even uttering such words? This was truly…
It must be that he had failed somewhere in her upbringing. He couldn’t let his well-bred Xiangyi develop a frivolous character.
He slowly straightened his back and turned his face toward her, looking rather serious. “You must not speak such words lightly, and you must never let other men hear them.”
Zheng Xiangyi: “I only say them to Your Majesty.”
She nestled her cheek against his arm, tilting her moist eyes upward to gaze at him tenderly.
Feng Jue’s eyes flickered slightly. “You shouldn’t say such things even to me.”
Zheng Xiangyi didn’t understand. “Why not?”
“Because I am your elder.” His voice grew slightly deeper. “You should only say such things to your future husband.”
Though Xiangyi had repeatedly declared she would never marry, Feng Jue always believed those were childish words. Perhaps she simply hadn’t yet met a young man who caught her eye, but surely there would be one in the future.
He still hoped Xiangyi would marry a suitable husband, live a peaceful and stable life, and not be left alone and helpless after his departure.
Zheng Xiangyi: “There won’t be anyone more handsome than Your Majesty.”
“You’re still young.” Feng Jue gently stroked her smooth hair, his voice warm. “In the future, you will meet even more handsome young men. I am already old.”
Zheng Xiangyi protested, “You are not old at all!”
She lifted her face from his arm, gazing at him earnestly. “Why do you always say you’re old? You’re only thirty-three now! If you consider that old, what about those white-bearded senior ministers at court? Wouldn’t half of them already be halfway into their graves?”
Feng Jue shook his head slightly. “If Feng Qin had been more capable, I might already be a grandfather by now. Unlike you, Xiangyi, in the prime of your youth.”
“But you are only eighteen years older than me!” Zheng Xiangyi’s eyes reddened, misted with tears. “It’s only eighteen years. I’m catching up now…”
She didn’t even know what she was saying; she just instinctively refused to hear him repeatedly emphasize the age gap between them. It was as if he were manually carving a chasm between them, forcing her to retreat.
Feng Jue fell silent.
Zheng Xiangyi stubbornly refused to yield. “No matter how old you are, whether you’re young or aged, healthy or ill, I will stay by your side forever, even in death!”
Feng Jue’s gaze abruptly shifted toward her. His dark eyes, like ink-soaked in a cold pool, suddenly emitted a chilling coldness.
“Xiangyi, do you realize what you’re saying?”
“I do.” Zheng Xiangyi lifted her chin. “Even if I have to say it again, I’m not afraid. Even if it means death…”
Feng Jue suddenly stood up, his expression icy. “I raised you for ten years, just to teach you to speak of death so lightly?”
He was furious, even clenching his fists uncontrollably. How could Xiangyi utter the word “death” so carelessly? He so desperately wanted her to live well, spending nights meticulously planning how best to protect her, ensuring she would remain safe and secure even after he was gone.
Yet she disregarded his earnest intentions and failed to cherish herself. Feng Jue wanted to lash out at her, but seeing her stubborn, unyielding posture, he instantly lost his strength.
It was his fault. He hadn’t taught Xiangyi well enough.
He bent down, gently cupping her face with his hands. “Don’t speak of ‘death’ so casually anymore, Xiangyi. Your life belongs to you. No one is more important than you.”
His voice was gentle and mellow, his gaze filled with helplessness and pity, as if he were holding a rare treasure in his hands.
Zheng Xiangyi’s eyelashes trembled slightly, and a tear rolled down. She bit her lip, her voice choked. “But besides you, no one thinks I’m the most important.”
In her past life, after Feng Yu welcomed the noble consort into the palace, her father had “earnestly advised” her to be magnanimous, saying that all emperors had consorts and that the noble consort could never surpass her.
She had felt so wronged. At that time, she thought that if it were His Majesty, he would surely comfort her, tell her that Feng Yu had wronged her, and that she hadn’t done anything wrong.
But there was no His Majesty anymore.
Zheng Xiangyi threw herself into his arms, clinging tightly to his waist, pleading pitifully, “Only you care for me, love me. I only want you.”
Feng Jue stood frozen in place, helpless. After a long moment, he slowly raised his hand, gently stroking her back, but couldn’t utter a single word.
Could he really rest assured and entrust Xiangyi to someone else?
In his heart, he knew the answer.
…
Returning to Zichen Hall, Feng Jue sank into deep thought before his desk. Xiangyi’s dependence on him brought him both solace and unease.
He worried that after he was gone, no one would protect her as he did. Her stubborn nature and refusal to yield would inevitably lead to hardship for her.
He slowly closed his eyes, picturing Xiangyi’s smiling face, her tearful face, her wronged face. Then, thinking of the vast age gap between them, he suddenly couldn’t help but slam his fist heavily onto the desk.
Why did there have to be such a vast difference in years between him and Xiangyi? He possessed the wealth of the realm, wielded power over all under heaven, was capable of anything—yet he was utterly helpless against this. Yet, if he weren’t so much older than Xiangyi, how could he have carefully nurtured her, holding her in his hands and raising her himself?
From the day Xiangyi came into his care, she had never suffered any grievance again. The thought that the young girl he had personally cherished and raised might be bullied after his departure caused a surge of rage to erupt within him, a desire to tear the perpetrator to pieces.
Eunuch Gui was startled by the loud crash on the desk, trembling and not daring to move until he heard His Majesty call for him.
“What do you think I should do to protect Xiangyi, so she won’t be bullied after I’m gone?”
Eunuch Gui almost stopped breathing. Your Majesty, you are in the prime of your life. Why are you worrying about such matters so early, and not even concerning the state, but fearing that the Junzhu might suffer after you’re gone?
He didn’t dare to respond. Feng Jue added, “Speak. I pardon your offense.”
Only then did Eunuch Gui cautiously speak. “Your Majesty will live a long and boundless life. Why worry about such things? As long as you are here, no one would dare to bully the Junzhu.”
“A long and boundless life?” Feng Jue said softly. “I truly wish for that, but has there ever been anyone in this world who truly lives forever?”
Eunuch Gui mustered his courage. “If Your Majesty worries about the Junzhu, why not take this opportunity to personally select a good match for her? Then the Junzhu would have someone to protect her, ensuring her a smooth and worry-free life.”
Feng Jue was silent for a moment. “What if Xiangyi doesn’t want to marry?”
“The Junzhu is young and has high standards. Ordinary people naturally wouldn’t catch her eye,” Eunuch Gui said. “But there are countless talented individuals in the world. If Your Majesty takes your time and selects carefully, you will surely find one or two suitable candidates. The Junzhu has always respected you. Anyone you choose, she will certainly hold in high regard.”
The room fell into silence. After a long while, Feng Jue slowly spoke. “Compile a list with portraits of suitable young men in the capital and present it to me.”