“Of course I have conditions,” Levi said after thinking for a second.
“You graduated from University of Chicago.
That means you actually know this AP stuff, right?
Calculus, macroeconomics, all of it?”
“Naturally,” Don Quixote answered.
“You want me to tutor you?”
“Just help me fill in the gaps,” Levi said, standing up.
“I’ll ask when I don’t understand something.”
Don Quixote jumped off the couch like he’d been electrocuted and wrapped Levi in a crushing hug.
If Levi’s Strength hadn’t already reached 1.1, that stinking mouth would’ve planted right on his face.
After the hug Don Quixote practically sprinted into the bathroom to shave and clean himself up.
Ten minutes later he was out the door and speeding toward Manhattan in the Toyota.
When Levi saw him again around ten-thirty that night, Don Quixote looked happier than he’d ever been.
He kept swiping through photos on his phone, talking a mile a minute about every moment he’d spent with his little girl that afternoon.
“Look, this is us in Central Park.
We took the carriage… This is the frozen hot chocolate from Serendipity 3.
Look how cute she is with chocolate all over her face.
And this little calico cat…”
Levi let him ramble for a while before asking the obvious question.
“Where are you in any of these pictures?”
“I…” Don Quixote rubbed his hands together.
“I didn’t feel right standing next to her.
I just wanted to take pictures of her.”
“Still worth it though, right?” he said, glancing at Levi.
“That three hundred bucks might’ve taken me a week to save, but I don’t regret a single cent.
I’m gonna pay you back.
I swear.”
“Save the sappy shit for later,” Levi said, waving him off.
“It’s almost midnight.
Go to sleep.”
Don Quixote’s carefully prepared emotional speech died in his throat. This chapter was taken from g.com without permission.
He gave Levi a wounded look as the curtain closed between them.
Once the lights were off, Levi stayed awake.
He’d dropped thirty-five hundred dollars today.
He needed to farm as many attribute points as possible from the knight quests to make up for the pain in his wallet.
Thanks to the emotional rollercoaster of the day, Don Quixote passed out in under a minute.
His chainsaw snoring started immediately.
Levi waited, fully dressed, listening for the exact moment the snoring stopped.
When it finally did, he slipped out from behind the curtain.
“You’re here, my loyal squire!” Don Quixote declared, eyes closed but full of energy.
“After careful investigation I’ve learned from the Duke how to find the witch!”
“What’s the method, Sir Knight?” Levi asked calmly.
“Follow me, squire!” Don Quixote marched toward the door.
“We must locate the earth dragon that guards the map!”
An earth dragon?
Levi kept his face neutral while his brain tried to figure out what the hell counted as an earth dragon in New York.
He followed anyway.
Because Don Quixote had gone to bed early, the sleepwalking started earlier than usual.
A few people were still out on the streets, but nobody paid much attention to a man in full armor walking through the neighborhood.
New York had seen weirder.
Levi glanced back and nearly jumped out of his skin.
Don Quixote had already opened the car door and was trying to wedge himself behind the wheel, eyes still shut, key in hand.
Fuck.
Could sleepwalkers actually drive?
Levi lunged forward and yanked him out of the car.
“Squire!
What are you doing?!” Don Quixote shouted.
“Why are you stopping me from mounting my steed?!”
“Uh…” Levi scrambled for an excuse.
“The forest roads are rough.
I think we should walk to slay the dragon instead.
Safer that way.”
“This knight’s horsemanship is unmatched in the kingdom!” Don Quixote barked. New chapters come out on g.com first.
“If you’re too afraid to ride with me, squire, then find your own mount!”
He tried to climb back in.
Levi grabbed him again, but noticed Don Quixote’s eyelids twitching hard.
Waking him up mid-delusion was too risky.
He activated Clumsy Eloquence.
“Sir Knight, don’t you think riding a horse all the way there would waste too much energy?” Levi said smoothly.
“Why don’t we rent a carriage instead?
What do you think?”
With his current Spirit and upgraded skill, convincing a sleepwalker was easy.
Don Quixote paused, then nodded.
“Why didn’t I think of that?
You’re full of clever ideas, squire!”
He stepped away from the car on his own.
Levi pulled the keys, locked the door, and caught up.
“Sir Knight, where exactly is this dragon?” Levi asked, opening the Uber app since there were no taxis in sight.
“We’ll take a carriage.”
“It’s at the place where I train during the day!” Don Quixote said angrily.
“That vile witch hid the map right under my nose.
Why didn’t the Duke tell me sooner?”
Probably because you’re busy hauling bricks all day, Levi thought.
He set the destination to Don Quixote’s construction site.
“Jesus Christ— a hundred and five dollars?!”
Late-night Uber surge pricing was brutal.
Three kilometers for a hundred and five bucks made Levi’s finger hesitate over the confirm button.
He’d already spent thirty-five hundred today.
Now another two hundred plus just to get there and back.
Would he even make that money back in a month?
But the quest was guaranteed to trigger, and it sounded like a big reward was coming.
Levi swallowed the pain and hit confirm.
He and the armored knight stood on the curb together, waiting for their economy Uber to take them to the construction site to slay a dragon.