Anom lay on his stomach, his left elbow pressing into the cardboard.
His face was turned toward Inem’s voice.
In the darkness where he couldn’t see anything at all.
He could feel Inem’s presence.
The same scent as the first night, when the wound on his hand dried up in an instant.
“Are you still cold?” Anom asked.
“Cold.”
“But it’s hot here.”
“Near you, it’s hot.”
Anom reached out in front of him just to find where Inem was.
His hand touched Inem’s arm.
His fingers moved up to her shoulder, to her slim neck, to her sharp jaw.
Inem didn’t move.
She let Anom feel her face in the dark.
Anom moved closer.
His lips searched for Inem’s lips.
The first kiss tonight felt different from the first night.
No longer awkward or hesitant.
Anom already knew where to put his hands.
Where the pressure made Inem sigh, and what touch would make Inem’s body react.
Inem’s lips were still, though not as still as yesterday.
Anom started to feel them slowly warm up, absorbing the heat from his own lips.
Anom’s tongue touched Inem’s tongue.
Inem let out a small moan.
A sound swallowed in the middle of the kiss.
Anom pulled away from the kiss, his breathing a little faster.
“Tomorrow morning I’m waking up early.
I have to deliver the meat to Pak Haji Duloh at four.”
“So?”
“So I don’t have much time.”
Inem laughed a little.
A laugh that could only be heard in the darkness.
“Time for what?”
Anom didn’t answer.
His hand felt for the cloth covering Inem’s body.
He pulled it slowly so it came off.
Cold air touched Inem’s skin.
Anom felt her shiver briefly.
Anom’s finger touched Inem’s stomach gently.
His hand felt the heat flowing beneath her skin.
The heat that came from inside.
“Do you still remember the first time?” Anom whispered.
“I remember.”
“You said you hadn’t felt anything in a long time.”
“Yes.”
“Now?”
Inem was quiet for a moment, but her hand reached for Anom’s hand.
Her fingers intertwined with Anom’s rough fingers.
“Now I feel everything.”
Anom kissed Inem’s neck.
Her white neck that looked like it had never seen the sun.
He kissed there, holding a little longer, feeling Inem’s pulse beating slowly under his lips.
Inem sighed restlessly.
Her hand spontaneously squeezed Anom’s shoulder.
Even though he was surprised and felt a little pain, Anom liked that pain.
Pain that reminded him he was still alive.
He started by kissing downward.
Toward Inem’s prominent collarbone.
Her small, flat chest.
Then Anom let his lips linger there.
While Inem bit her own lip and held back her voice.
“Don’t hold it in, Inem,” Anom whispered.
“There’s no one here.
Just us two.”
Inem released her lip.
Her voice came out softly in reply, a little shaky.
“Anom…”
“Yes.”
“Don’t stop.
Keep going.”
Anom didn’t stop.
He kept kissing downward.
Inem’s hollow stomach felt warm.
Her narrow hips.
Her hip bones that he could feel under the skin.
Inem took a long breath when Anom’s lips touched her inner thigh.
Anom felt Inem’s thigh tremble.
A small twitch she couldn’t control.
“Does this hurt?” Anom asked.
“Not hurt.”
“Then?”
“This is…
too much.
Too much…
Argh.”
Anom lifted his head in the darkness, even though he couldn’t see Inem’s face beyond just a silhouette.
But he felt the warmth between Inem’s thighs.
Warmth that invited him and made his erection tense and ache from being held back.
Anom started to move up again.
Crawling slowly over Inem’s body.
His knees pressed into the cardboard on the left and right of Inem’s hips.
His hands rested beside Inem’s head.
“How long has it been since you felt this?” Anom asked.
Inem didn’t answer.
“How long?”
“A long time,” Inem whispered.
Her voice cracked.
“Until I forgot what it felt like.”
“Now you remember?”
“Now I remember.
But…
I only remember yours.”
Anom didn’t speak anymore.
He just lowered his body until his chest touched Inem’s chest.
When his stomach touched Inem’s stomach.
Heat spread, and now his whole body was hot.
His erection found its way in.
Inem opened her thighs wide to make room.
Anom pushed in slowly.
The tip of his erection touched something wet, warm, and slippery.
Inem sighed again, her hands gripping Anom’s back.
“Slowly, Anom,” Inem whispered.
Anom pushed again at the same speed.
Now he was halfway in, making Inem bite his shoulder.
Anom felt Inem’s teeth press into his skin.
It hurt a little.
But he didn’t stop.
He pushed one more time, fully now.
His erection sank completely into Inem’s warmth.
They both stopped moving.
Exhaling, their chests rising and falling together.
“Inem.”
Inem didn’t answer.
But her hands, gripping Anom’s back, slowly relaxed.
Her fingers gently stroked Anom’s skin.
Anom started moving.
Out.
In.
Out.
In.
Moving with a slow rhythm.
He learned from the first time.
Slowly, not too deep, following Inem’s body rhythm, her breath, her moans.
As if a voice in his head was giving instructions.
Inem bit her own lip.
Her voice came out between her teeth.
“Anom…
you can, a little faster.”
Anom started speeding up his movements.
His hips moved back and forth.
The cardboard under them scraped against the dirt floor.
The sound was soft, covered by the noise of vehicles on the toll road above.
Inem moaned louder.
Her hands gripped Anom’s rough hair.
Pulling it, even tugging a little.
Anom groaned too.
Pain and pleasure mixed.
“Anom…
I…”
“Yes.”
“I want to…”
Inem tensed up, her body going stiff under Anom.
Her thighs started to tighten.
Her hands gripped Anom’s hips so hard.
Anom felt something wet and warm burst at the tip of his erection, and Inem let out a small cry.
A sound was swallowed in the middle of the night.
Inem immediately went limp.
Her breathing was short, her hands falling to her sides.
Anom stopped moving.
But he was still inside Inem.
“You haven’t yet?” Inem whispered.
“Not yet.”
Inem laughed weakly.
“You…
Shh…
Argh.”
Anom didn’t answer.
He started moving again.
Continuing again slowly.
Inem let him.
Her eyes closed again.
Her breathing started to steady.
Anom started kissing Inem’s forehead, then her eyelids, her cheeks, her lips.
Until he felt something building in his stomach.
A hot sensation, pushing.
Looking for a way out.
“Inem.”
“Just let go.”
Anom held Inem tighter, his face pressed into Inem’s stiff, messy hair.
He let everything go in one long breath.
…
They were quiet.
Anom didn’t move.
He was still on top of Inem, and Inem didn’t push him away on purpose.
Her hands just stroked Anom’s back, wet with sweat.
“What’s wrong?” Inem asked.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re different from the first time.”
Anom lifted his head.
In the darkness, he tried to catch Inem’s eyes.
But he could only feel.
“Different how?”
“You’re more…
patient.
Not awkward anymore.”
“I learned.”
“From who?”
“From you.”
Inem was quiet for a moment.
Then she laughed.
Anom smiled.
But in this darkness, with his body still joined with Inem, he felt that smile was natural.
He moved to the side.
His erection came out of Inem.
The cold night air immediately greeted it.
Inem moved, resting her head on Anom’s chest.
Her arm wrapped around Anom’s stomach.
“You’re not going to leave, are you?” Inem whispered.
“Go where?”
“To that perfect place.
The one I told you about earlier.”
Anom stroked Inem’s stiff hair.
“I don’t know any perfect place.
I only know the toll road, the wet market, and sewer water.”
“Aren’t you curious?”
“Tired, not curious.”
Inem sighed.
Her breath was warm on Anom’s chest.
“What time are you waking up tomorrow?” Inem asked.
“Three.”
“Three in the morning?”
“Yes.
I have to clean the fish first before taking them to Pak Haji Duloh.”
“So you can only sleep for three hours.”
“Normal.
I’m used to it.”
Inem shook her head slowly.
Her stiff hair tickled Anom’s chin.
“Tomorrow, sell the fish fast.
Then come back.
Take a nap.”
“Come back where?”
“Here.
Home.”
Anom was quiet.
Home.
That word again.
Before, he never had a place worthy of being called home.
Just a shack.
Just a hiding spot.
But Inem called it home.
Maybe that’s what it was.
Home doesn’t need thick walls or a good roof.
Home just needs someone waiting inside.
“Yes,” Anom finally said.
“I’ll come back.
Take a nap.
Then at night…”
“At night, what?”
“At night we do it again.”
Inem laughed a little.
“You’re not tired?”
“Tired.
But a good kind of tired.”
Inem didn’t answer.
She just held Anom tighter.