The night after the heavy rain.
The illegal electricity was still out.
Anom lit a small candle on top of an old biscuit tin.
The flickering candlelight created giant shadows on the concrete pillar walls.
Anom lay on his back.
His eyes stared blankly at the tarpaulin ceiling.
His mind was noisy, louder than the sound of the leftover flood in the canal.
He thought about what happened earlier today.
His net intact against all odds.
Hundreds of plecostomus that seemed to surrender their lives.
Ali’s hate-filled stare.
All these miracles pointed to one thing.
The woman curled up in the corner of the shack.
Anom turned his head.
Inem looked restless in her sleep.
Her breathing was short.
Her lips even muttered softly.
Anom moved his ear closer, trying to catch the sound.
Inem mentioned names Anom had never heard.
Names that sounded ancient.
Grand.
But spoken with a fearful tone.
Inem talked about a cold throne.
About a garden that never wilted.
Even about judgment.
All this time, Anom thought those ravings were just trauma or mental illness.
He thought Inem was a victim of violence who ran away until her mind broke.
But after seeing the canal water “submit” to Inem, Anom started doubting his own logic.
“Inem,” Anom called softly.
His voice broke through the muttering.
Inem opened her eyes.
Under the dim candlelight, Inem’s pupils dilated.
Reflecting orange light.
Her eyes weren’t like ordinary human eyes.
There was a painful clarity there.
“Are you really a goddess, Inem?” The question came out bluntly.
It sounded stupid.
Even to Anom’s own ears.
But he needed an answer.
Inem didn’t answer right away.
She sat up slowly.
Leaning against the neatly arranged cardboard wall.
She looked at her thin hands.
Then looked at Anom.
As if she had seen worlds born and destroyed many times over.
“I was,” Inem answered.
Anom swallowed.
“Then why are you here?
In this smelly place under the toll road?
Next to a rough guy like me?”
Inem was quiet.
Then she started talking.
Her voice flowed softly.
Like an ancient story locked in a rusty chest for thousands of years.
“I made mistakes, Anom.
Many times.
I was given the task of healing.
Guarding the breath of those up there.
But my heart got tired.
I made errors.
One patient died.
Then another.
Those who called themselves perfect couldn’t accept flaws.
Perfection is a cruel prison.”
Inem took a long breath.
Her eyes looked far away through the darkness under the toll road.
“They were angry.
To me, death was mercy.
But they wouldn’t give it.
They put the spirit of fish into my soul.
The spirit of creatures they considered the lowest.
Then they threw me here.
To a place where the water is no longer clear.
So I could feel what it’s like to be the most meaningless.”
Anom processed every word.
His forehead wrinkled.
“Fish spirit?
What fish?”
Inem looked toward the plastic bucket by the door.
Where Anom piled the tough plecostomus skins before throwing them away.
“Fish that live in mud.
That look ugly and are disliked.
That are only seen as trash cleaners.
Plecostomus.
The fish everyone looks down on.”
Anom’s heart pounded hard.
That explanation gave context to all the strangeness he had experienced.
The skin that seemed to give up to his knife.
The meat that stayed clean white.
The fish that entered his net as if seeking protection from their discarded queen.
Inem wasn’t just a friend.
Inem was the embodiment of the creatures he had been killing and eating to survive.
“So…
you’re half fish?” Anom asked.
His voice trembled.
“I am them.
And they are me,” Inem answered softly.
“That’s why I can’t go far from this water.
My skin will dry out.
My spirit will rebel.
I’m cursed to stay forever between mud and concrete.
To witness those who are also thrown away by the world.”
…
Anom was quiet.
His eyes looked at Inem.
The candle on the biscuit tin was fading.
The wick had burned short.
Anom didn’t replace it.
Darkness slowly crept in from the corners of the shack.
Inem was also quiet.
Her face was calm.
Like someone who had just put down a heavy burden from her shoulders.
“Let’s sleep,” Anom said.
His voice was soft.
“Tomorrow morning I’ll sell the fish first.
We can talk about goddess stuff another time.”
Inem smiled slightly.
A smile that only showed at the corner of her lips.
“You’re not scared?”
“Scared of what?
Of a goddess who sleeps under the toll road and eats big portions of rice?
No, Inem.
I’m not scared.”
Anom lay down.
Closed his eyes.
But Inem hadn’t slept yet.
…
Anom felt movement beside him.
Inem got up.
She crawled closer and her hand gently touched Anom’s chest.
Her fingers started unbuttoning Anom’s shirt one by one, slowly.
“What time are you selling the fish tomorrow?” Inem whispered.
“Four.”
“What time is it now?”
Anom opened his eyes.
In the darkness, he only saw Inem’s silhouette right above him.
“Maybe ten at night.”
“Still a long time.”
Inem then started kissing Anom’s neck.
Her cold tongue licked Anom’s skin, salty from a day’s sweat.
Anom shivered a little.
Inem went down to his chest, straight to his stomach.
“Inem…”
“Shh…
quiet.”
Inem quickly pulled down Anom’s shorts without hesitation.
She pulled them down to his ankles.
Anom bit his lip, realizing he was already hard.
Inem then bent down and her messy hair touched Anom’s thigh.
Then her warm lips deliberately kissed slowly.
Anom took a long breath.
“Inem…
what are you doing?”
Inem didn’t answer, because now her lips opened and her cold tongue touched the tip of Anom’s erection.
Anom gripped the cardboard under him, his hands clenching.
“Inem…
I’ve never…”
Inem lifted her head.
Her eyes seemed to look at Anom in the darkness.
“I’ve never either.
So we learn together.”
Inem bent down again.
Her mouth worked slowly.
Her tongue wet, stroked, tried.
Sometimes she sucked again.
Sometimes too deep, making Anom gasp.
But Inem didn’t stop.
She learned from every reaction, every sigh that came out.
“Enough, Nem…” Anom whispered.
“Come up here.”
Inem lifted her head.
“Why?”
“I want to repay you.”
Inem was quiet.
“Repay?”
“Just watch.”
Anom quickly got up and started turning Inem around.
The girl fell slowly onto the pile of cardboard, then Anom opened the thin cloth covering Inem’s body.
Inem lay on her back in front of him, and it was still dark.
Anom couldn’t even see details, but he could feel.
Anom bent down, his mouth touching Inem’s stomach.
Her hollow, cold stomach.
He kissed downward, her navel, moving to her hip bone.
Then the thin hair down there.
Inem took a breath.
“Anom…
that…
never…”
“I’ve never either.
You said we learn together.”
Anom opened Inem’s thighs with both hands.
Inem let him.
Anom bent down.
His tongue touched the gap between Inem’s thighs.
Inem let out a small cry, her voice somewhat restrained, and her hand gripped Anom’s hair tightly.
“Anom…!”
Anom kept going.
His tongue searched, parted, licked until Inem unconsciously squirmed.
Her hips moved up and down uncontrollably.
Her hand that had been gripping Anom’s hair got stronger.
“Anom…
don’t stop.”
Anom didn’t stop.
He even pushed his tongue in, making Inem’s body arch.
Her voice broke.
“Aaaa…
Anom…
that…
oh…”
Inem bit her own lip.
Then one of her hands gripped Anom’s arm, her nails even digging into his skin.
Anom kept working.
His tongue didn’t stop.
Because every time he moved, Inem’s body reacted.
Spasms, vibrations, even unclear moans.
Inem reached her peak after that.
Her body started to harden, tensing like a drawn bow.
Her hand pulled Anom’s hair so hard that some strands came loose.
Her mouth opened wide, but no sound came out.
Only fast breathing.
Then she went limp and the hand gripping Anom’s hair relaxed.
Anom lifted his head.
He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.
Inem lay limp on the cardboard.
Her chest rose and fell quickly.
“Done?” Anom asked.
Inem didn’t answer.
Her eyes were still closed and her breathing was still short.
“Inem.”
“Not yet.” Inem’s voice was hoarse.
“Just keep going, Anom.
Don’t stop.”
Inem got up, then she pushed Anom until he was lying on his back again.
Inem sat on Anom’s lap.
Her hand reached for Anom’s erection, still hard.
She guided it in.
Inem moved her hips faster and wilder, as if impatient.
Anom could only lie there, watching Inem’s silhouette moving up and down above him.
“Inem…
you’re fierce tonight.”
Inem didn’t answer.
She bit Anom’s lip then her tongue went in to explore.
Anom returned the kiss.
They both moved in the dark, not seeing each other, only feeling.
Inem reached her peak again.
This time longer.
Harder.
Her body trembled above Anom.
Anom felt a warm burst at his erection.
He couldn’t hold it anymore.
He held Inem tight.
His face pressed against Inem’s small, flat chest.
He let everything go in one long breath.
They were quiet.
Inem fell to the side.
Her body limp.
Anom breathed heavily.
“Are you satisfied?” Anom asked.
Inem didn’t answer.
She pressed closer to Anom’s chest.
Her arm wrapped around Anom’s stomach.
“Not yet,” Inem whispered.
“But tomorrow again.”
Anom laughed a little.
His voice was hoarse.
“Tomorrow I sell fish at four.”
“It’s still ten.”
“You keep track too.”
Inem bit Anom’s chest hard and said, “Shut up.”
…
Anom stroked Inem’s messy hair.
His hand was gentle.
Inem snored softly.
“Tomorrow I’ll buy you new clothes.”
“What for?”
“So you won’t be cold.”
Inem shook her head against Anom’s chest.
“I’m still cold.
Always have been.
Since I fell here.”
“Fine.
I’ll still buy them.”
Inem didn’t answer.
She closed her eyes.
Her breathing started to steady.
Anom looked toward the shack door.
Outside, the canal water kept flowing.
Black.
Murky.
Full of trash.
But inside the shack, there was only warmth.
Warmth from the cursed half-fish goddess woman.
They’re alone.