The biggest problem right now wasn’t their skills, it was how badly they worked together. I needed to fix that.
"Let’s see..."
I finished washing the dishes, picked up my phone, and slipped out onto the veranda. There was one person I could always ask for help in a situation like this.
"Yeah, it’s me. I wanted to ask you about something..."
"Boss!" Secretary Maya’s voice blasted through the phone, loud enough to hurt my ears.
"Whoa, calm down. What’s wrong?"
"What’s wrong? You haven’t called me to work or given me anything to do! Do you not need me anymore?!"
Ever since I got assigned to the Convict Unit, my job had basically become work-from-home, so my secretary didn’t need to come in either. Maya seemed to think that meant I was throwing her away, and she was whining about it sadly.
"It’s not that I don’t need you—look, you know I can’t get anything done without you."
"You say that, but you haven’t contacted me for two whole weeks—"
"Manager? Are you on the phone with your girlfriend?"
"Huh?"
"Whose voice was that just now, Boss?"
As soon as I heard Ruby’s voice right next to my ear, I covered the phone’s receiver and turned my head. The blonde lunatic was standing behind me without me noticing, her eyes gleaming.
"Using my professional counselor instincts, I’d say Manager’s love life is in serious trouble. Am I right?"
"You haven’t gotten a single thing right, from start to finish."
"Well, you’re living with a smoking hot beauty like me... how could any girlfriend compare? I totally get it if you want to break up and try something with me instead."
"What are you even— Hey!"
"It’s fine, Manager~ I’ll handle this~"
She snatched the phone right out of my hand. With the happiest look on her face, Ruby put it to her ear.
"Hello~ I’m your boyfriend’s new woman..."
Then she froze solid, her smiling face stuck in place. She blinked a few times, standing completely still with the phone pressed to her ear for a long moment, before finally moving her stiff arm to hand it back to me.
"Uh, okay..."
Ruby’s face had gone a strange color. She didn’t tease me anymore and just hurried off the veranda.
What the hell did Maya say to her?
"Hello? Maya, what did you just say to Ruby—"
"Boss ... You’re not going to throw me away, are you?"
"No, of course I’m not."
"I know you’re lying..."
"I’m not lying."
I didn’t even get to ask what she said to Ruby. Maya started complaining again in a voice that sounded like she was on the verge of tears.
...She probably didn’t say anything that bad.
That gloomy girl with the big chest and the timid heart had been so scared when we reached the hotel room where those two were that she’d fainted and then clung to my arm for dear life.
I shook my head and smiled a little.
"Don’t be silly. Even if someone got left behind, it wouldn’t be me leaving you, it’d be you leaving—"
"That will never, ever happen."
"Huh? Oh... it was just a figure of speech."
For a second there, her tone sounded a little different from usual. Maybe I imagined it.
"Anyway, what I’m saying is I’d never dump you like that. You know I don’t even have the contact info for the Association staff without you, right?"
"Ehehe... See? Boss really can’t do anything without me."
"Yeah, yeah. I said I can’t do anything without you, Maya."
It took repeating several times that I couldn’t function without Maya before I could finally get to the main point.
"More importantly, I wanted you to recommend a good outing course where women can bond. Hey... are you listening?"
"...Why would Boss want to know something like that?"
"It’d be good if they got closer. There’s also something I want to try after they get friendly."
"......"
Maya went completely silent on the other end. For a moment, I heard a strange grinding sound, like teeth clenching, followed by the rapid clacking of a keyboard. This chapter was taken from g.com without permission.
Was she looking something up?
"I’ll handle everything. I’ll plan the course and make the reservations, so just follow the schedule."
"Are you sure that’s okay?"
"Of course. Because for Boss, there’s ’only me,’ after all."
Maya’s voice sounded like she was smiling. I let out a sigh of relief, glad to have this off my plate.
Alright. I’d just trust Maya with this. In my secretary’s ability to get things done when it mattered.
◆ ◆ ◆
"Please, please don’t hurt me! PLEASE!"
The screen lit up the dark theater. On it, a frail heroine was tied to an old bed, begging for mercy from a psycho in a mask.
The set was covered in fake entrails and splatters of blood, and it was gross enough to make even me, a guy, feel queasy.
...Wasn’t this supposed to be an outing course for them to get closer?
Yeah, I was pretty sure I’d asked Maya for exactly that.
So why were we watching a gore movie?
And on top of that...
"HA, HA! Do you trust your boyfriend? You should. Because..."
"No, NO! NO!!"
"Ahh, so scary...~"
On my left, Ruby was hugging my arm tight against her chest and letting out fake screams, fooling around.
"......!"
On my right, Audrey sat perfectly stiff, her face pale white, gripping my hand tightly.
It was a pretty weird situation.