The image of my response - to their
ultimatum
- is posted both in the social network thread that started this and in the Alpha’s private section. Once that is done, I feel an incredible sense of relief.
I hate only reacting to problems instead of
getting ahead of them
, but when I have to do so... making sure
everyone
is on the same page as I am has been key to growing this business.
My Beta looks over with
another slow exhale
from him as he tries talking me down.
"You realize what you’re risking here? Not just politically, but personally? You’re gambling the pack’s stability. On a woman who hasn’t even accepted you, if I understand it."
"I know exactly what I’m risking."
"No, I don’t think you do. You’re putting her above the pack, Ky. Above your responsibilities. This isn’t like you."
His voice
hardened
as he spoke to me and I felt a flash of
anger
, then
forced myself
to calm down. To count. He wasn’t
wrong
. Not exactly.
I think I’m
acting fairly rationally
, but I’ve never been in lo-... I’ve never
had a mate bond waiting
. How much of me is
behaving
rationally, how much is just treating her as a member of my pack, and how much is making me...
obsess
?
When I speak again, it’s quiet. But with the same
strong
certainty as I’ve had ever since she
rebuffed me
the first time.
"What would you have me do, Luca? Let them take my potential mate and her child by force? Would that have been the responsible Alpha thing to do?"
"Of course not. But lying to Victoria-"
"Was a decision I made against an element of our pack that has always sought to undermine me. Who was the cause of this in the fucking first place, Luca, and is lucky I didn’t get more upset than I did."
I pushed both the letter and the tablet, still sitting right on the
social posts
, to him. Then my claws grip on the arms of my chair. This uncomfortable chair that I at least can’t
destroy
in moments like this.
"Look at that, then have this delivered immediately. I’m not backing down on it."
Luca didn’t move toward the door after scanning it. But he did
click his tongue
... a sound I only hear him make about either his
father
or that woman.
I don’t like that the only
reason
he might agree with me over this is because of something Victoria has done. But it’s also true that if it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t be so
upset
.
"And what happens when... Citra discovers we’ve known about her pregnancy?"
"She won’t find out from me. Or from anyone in this pack. Not if I have anything to say about it."
"Look, I know Claire is amazing at what she does, but you can’t control information like that, Kyrie. Not forever. Someone will say something and it will be out."
"I don’t need forever. Just... need to give her more time. Please, just back me on this."
I’m not sure what my
face
looks like, but Luca shook his head. Looking genuinely concerned now, more
personally
than before.
"I’ve never seen you like this. Over anyone."
"...I’ve never felt like this. About anyone."
"And if she leaves? If she rejects the mate bond? What then?"
I turned the chair and looked away, out the window again. Out to
wherever
she is. Wherever she’ll
go
.
And right now? I can’t picture myself not
following
.
"Then I’ll deal with that when it happens."
"Alpha. Listen to me. If she leaves and you’re this invested... the pack would be at risk. We’d be at risk."
I turned back to him, understanding what he’s really getting at. An Alpha
rejected
firmly by their fated mate could become
unstable and dangerous
. We both knew the
stories
.
"If that happens. And if I become a danger to the pack. You have my permission to do what needs to be done."
Each line is delivered carefully. In the end, Luca
pales
with a fearful emotion as he steps back. His
eyes even glow
a little...
"That’s not what I-"
"But I should warn you. If I think you’re wrong. That I still have my mate and my pack’s interest in mind. Then I wouldn’t make it easy for you."
Delivering a
cold
smile, one I never want Citra to see me make... he stared at me. For a long
challenging moment
, then shook his head as he went to the door to carry out my
order
.
"Truly. Goddess help us all. What was she thinking, giving you such a messy situation."
When he was
gone
, I sat back down at my desk. Soon enough, I looked at the clinic charge on my tablet once more. Then I was opening my
phone
and looking at the
pictures
she sent me.
Angry face, shocked me, cityscape, fox mug. All of it feels so
random
. All of it feels so
precious
.
I tried to set it all aside. To return to the quarterly projections and the reviews of Lunarizon work still weeks out. But my heart still
thundered
in my chest.
So much that I go and just sit down on the floor near the window and look out at the sky. The
darkening
sky, dropping rain and...
flashing with lightning
.
When
Lodestar
chimes in my ear with the artificial voice that I have a picture message from her, I
scramble to my feet
rather embarrassingly. Slipping and
hugging
the chair near my desk to stop myself from falling.
The phone is poked at with too
eager
fingers. Only to find a picture...
of a fish
.
"...Why a fish?"
When I stop
chuckling
, I steady myself and try to
hide my smile
with my hand. But the mic won’t pick up as well if I do.
"Lodestar, reply: It looks tasty."
When the Lunar Goddess
crossed
our paths - and when
my mate
immediately fought against it... I honestly thought that
blessings
do sometimes come with
downsides
. That nothing
worth
having is worth refusing to
fight
for.
C: [It was.]
And yet... what I learned changed nothing about what I really felt. Nothing about what I wanted. Citra and her child would be safe in my territory. Under my protection.
Whether she ever
accepted
a marking or not, I would ensure that. And if the Duskpaw, their Alpha, her
former
mate, or
anyone else
tried to interfere...
"Lodestar, reply: That’s a beautiful pike. Do you-"
They’d learn
exactly
... what [better hands]
really meant
.