Soon, Da Tuanzi’s food arrived.
Since the shops weren’t far away, the two orders arrived almost back-to-back. Da Tuanzi went to answer the door and soon brought in two portions of rice with toppings. He raised the livestream camera so the viewers could see the tabletop clearly.
“Alright, let’s start the review.”
The public chat box was scrolling rapidly.
[It’s here! The ‘Divine Chinese-Chic’ packaging!]
[Lol, as soon as I see this packaging, I know what’s up.]
[Lalala, ‘Chinese-Chic’ packaging and pre-prepared meal kits are a match made in heaven.]
[Trendy packaging, flimsy spoons, and a drink for an extra dime… it’s impossible for this not to be a disaster!]
While the group was joking around, Da Tuanzi quickly unpacked the food. After a moment of thought, he found some sticky notes his nephew had left behind; he put a red one on Wen’s and a yellow one on Wu’s so the viewers could tell them apart.
“Mhm, let’s see the differences. First, on the left…”
Da Tuanzi picked up a small carton of unbranded iced tea and set it aside. “Wu’s sent a drink for an extra dime. For Wen’s, the delivery guy said if I give a good review, I’ll get a bottle of mineral water on my next visit.”
[Unbranded drink +1. You can get those at wholesale markets for less than fifty cents a bottle.]
[I sometimes admire these merchants—where do they even find these ‘San-wu’ (no brand, no date, no license) drinks? I’ve never even heard of the brand.]
[To the person above, they still make a profit even at fifty cents a bottle; you have no idea how high the profit margins are on drinks.]
[I’d rather they didn’t send anything than send me a drink like that.]
[More than the drink, I’m looking forward to Da Tuanzi going to the shop later, hahaha. Every single place that sends this kind of drink has turned out to be a disaster.]
[Host, open the boxes! My delivery has arrived, and I’m just waiting to watch you eat so I can enjoy my food!]
Da Tuanzi opened Wu’s first. “For this one, I ordered the Chicken and Potato over rice; it’s the shop’s best-seller.”
With a snap, Da Tuanzi frowned. The lid of the container had chipped instantly upon opening, and shards of plastic almost fell into the bowl.
[Wow, Da Tuanzi explained this before—these plastic boxes are the cheapest ones. They’re made very thin to save money.]
[A meal only costs a few yuan; it’s normal to control costs.]
[What do you mean ‘normal’? It’s so thin; it’s fine for rice, but try ordering something with soup and see if it spills everywhere!]
Even before eating, Da Tuanzi had a premonition. Sure enough, when he saw the food inside, the potatoes were cut into irregular sizes and there were very few chicken pieces. Although it smelled fragrant, the color was clearly off. Da Tuanzi made an immediate judgment: the chicken was almost certainly from a pre-prepared meal kit.
Actually, this was Sun Mengyun’s idea. As her delivery business improved over the past few days, she wanted to squeeze her already thin profit margins even further. She had simply taken some near-expired “Yellow Braised Chicken” meal kits from her sister-in-law’s shop. These kits just needed to be boiled with some potatoes and mushrooms, and they actually sold quite well as rice bowls.
But in the eyes of Da Tuanzi, who was used to all kinds of delivery, he could recognize it in a second. The viewers, who had watched many of his reviews, were even more sharp-eyed.
[Isn’t this just Yellow Braised Chicken? And they gave even less than a proper Yellow Braised Chicken shop.]
[LOL, this reminds me of when Da Tuanzi asked a delivery guy which foods to avoid. Yellow Braised Chicken is always at the top of the list.]
[Da Tuanzi said before he’d never eat Yellow Braised Chicken again, yet here he is ordering it as a rice bowl today, hahaha.]
Da Tuanzi looked pained. “Stop talking… I already feel bad enough, okay?”
Consistent with his principles as a food vlogger, he scooped up a piece of chicken and put it in his mouth.
[What’s the taste? What’s the taste?]
Da Tuanzi craned his neck and swallowed. “…A familiar taste.”
[Hahahahaha!]
Amidst a sea of “hahahaha” in the comments, Da Tuanzi finished the meal with a conflicted expression.
[Gotta give the host credit; he finishes the plate no matter how bad it is. That’s dedication.]
After finishing the rice, Da Tuanzi silently reached for a bottle of mineral water.
[Is the host eating the next one?]
“I’m eating it!”
Da Tuanzi silently opened the other portion. As he opened it, he introduced it: “This place seems to change its menu every day, so I just ordered something at random.”
[As someone whose family is in the restaurant business, places that change their menu daily or offer seasonal dishes usually aren’t bad.]
[That makes sense. Seasonal vegetables are cheap. If a place has the exact same dishes all year round with the same price, you have to wonder if something is wrong.]
[Everyone, is our Tuanzi going to experience two extremes today?]
[It’s possible. Maybe we’ll get a long-awaited SSR (Super Super Rare).]
Da Tuanzi uncovered the delivery box. The Wen family used a simple transparent container, but when placed next to Wu’s, the difference in quantity was obvious.
“Here we go, Twice-Cooked Pork over rice.”
Even though the food had been steamed in the box for a while, Da Tuanzi took a deep breath the moment he opened it.
So… so fragrant!
Looking closely, he saw a layer of glistening, enticing meat slices laid over plump grains of rice. The pork belly was sliced thin, about two fingers wide, with the edges of the fatty parts curled up and shining with oil. The lean meat was fried until crispy and looked firm and chewy. Green chili peppers were scattered throughout, and the sauce and red oil had seeped down, staining even the rice red.
The chat paused for just a second before being flooded with messages.
[Argh! It looks so delicious!]
[There are potato slices inside! Argh! Deep-fried golden potato slices! I want to eat!]
[I bet this tastes bad. If it tastes good, I’ll eat it all myself!]
[Host, I’m telling you, adults shouldn’t eat this. Send it to me; I’ll eat it for you. I’m a ‘little person.’]
Da Tuanzi looked entranced. Even though he had just eaten a full meal, his taste buds were screaming again. He couldn’t wait and scooped up a mouthful of meat and rice. Instantly, the texture of the twice-cooked pork combined with the warm rice exploded on his palate.
The chewiness of the fat, the charred aroma of the lean meat, and a hint of the sauce’s fragrance from the broad bean paste—the ‘wok hei’ from the high-heat stir-frying rushed into his nose. The rice was soaked in the savory, oily sauce of the pork. There weren’t many potato slices, but the few simple pieces were cherished by Da Tuanzi; they were fried until puffy, crispy on the outside and soft on the inside. Their flavor was not inferior to the meat at all.
Da Tuanzi stopped interacting with the chat and just buried his head in his food, eating ravenously.
[Aaaah! I want to eat it too!]
[Host, look at the screen! Which delivery shop is it?!]
[I’m already heading toward Qunying Middle School, wait for me!]
[Argh! I’ve never been this hungry in my life. The food in my mouth suddenly tastes like nothing.]
Da Tuanzi ate the entire meal clean, even carefully scraping the stray grains of rice from the lid into his mouth.
“Everyone, this is the first time I’ve ever had such delicious rice with toppings…”
Having eaten his fill, Da Tuanzi leaned back in his chair, staring blankly ahead. “This one is definitely made to order. The cooking skills are top-tier.”
[…Duh!]
[Aaaaah! Hurry up and move to the next step! I want to see the scene!]
[Yeah, hurry up and film the shop. If the hygiene is okay, I’m going there tonight!]
Da Tuanzi gave an ‘OK’ sign to the camera. “No problem, guys. I’ll go and review the shop in a bit!”
Normally, the review and the store visit didn’t have to happen consecutively—usually, he’d eat at noon and visit in the evening. But when Da Tuanzi saw the viewer count in the upper right corner hitting over 3,000 and still rising, he made an immediate decision: go now!
After a quick adjustment, he clipped the livestream setup to his handlebars, hopped on his electric scooter, and set off. He soon found Qunying Middle School based on the address. He looked for Wu’s first. It was currently the end of the lunch rush, and there were few people on the street.
Da Tuanzi watched from a distance, his brow furrowed. The front of Sun Mengyun and her husband’s shop was a mess. Even though it was noon, a huge braising pot was sitting outside. There was no fire under it, and a layer of film had congealed over the various braised items floating inside. The interior of the shop was dark—clearly, neither the air conditioning nor the lights were on. However, two delivery drivers were waiting at the door, both using items in their hands to fan themselves.
After a moment of thought, Da Tuanzi pulled a helmet from his scooter’s basket and put it on, pretending to be a fellow delivery driver to get closer to the others.
“Hey brothers, is the food here good? I just finished my shift and I’m looking for a place to eat!”
The two delivery drivers glanced at each other. Seeing Da Tuanzi’s fair skin, they assumed he was just a part-time gig worker.
One lowered his voice. “Eat what? This place is terrible.”
Da Tuanzi pressed further. “How so? It looks like a new shop.”
One of the drivers, who was clearly familiar with the area, pulled Da Tuanzi aside and whispered, “This place used to sell rice noodles; they don’t know how to sell rice meals. Look at this stuff—it’s all just thrown together.”
“Then why aren’t they selling rice noodles? Why this?”
The driver looked gossipy. “Why else? You’ll know if you walk further in. This shop is just a ‘shell-picker.'”
“Shell-picking” meant clinging to an old or viral shop to divert their traffic or piggyback on their fame—like picking up the shell of a shell after the explosion has happened.
Da Tuanzi asked, “Which shop are they picking from? Is it Wen’s?”
The driver nodded. “You came for that one too? Then keep going in. It’s the one next to the pharmacy and the grocery store. Don’t go to the wrong one.”
Da Tuanzi thanked the driver and peeked his head further in, just in time to see several boxes at the door. Whether Sun Mengyun was too careless or had completely given up on the shop’s reputation, the boxes at the entrance were clearly labeled “Yellow Braised Chicken Meal Kits” in large characters. The thousands of people in Da Tuanzi’s livestream saw it instantly.
[Wow, this place really isn’t hiding it.]
[They’re too bold, just leaving them at the door like that.]
[Am I the only one who noticed they don’t have the AC on? I’m telling you, they’re so stingy with money—aren’t they afraid the heat will spoil the food?]
[Did you see just now? The inside is so dirty, lots of flies.]
[And this is right in front of a school? Aren’t they afraid of making the students sick?]
Da Tuanzi also felt a bit nauseous. If he had mentally prepared himself before eating, he now realized his preparation had been insufficient. He thought that because the shop was located near a school, the hygiene would be better. Who would have thought it would be just as bad as those unbranded delivery spots in tiny alleys!
Da Tuanzi hopped on his scooter and immediately submitted a hygiene complaint on the platform. Then he continued down the street.
As soon as he left, Sun Mengyun came out from the back kitchen.
“Hey, did I just hear someone out here?”
Had someone come to the shop? Neither of the two delivery drivers answered her. Furious, Sun Mengyun kicked one of the boxes at the door.
“Wu Daneng! Didn’t I tell you to move the boxes inside? They’re blocking the way!”