Vaggie had expressed her disagreement exactly seven times since their departure.
The first three had been relatively diplomatic.
The fourth had contained the word “stupid,” the fifth “suicidal,” and the last two had essentially consisted of asking Charlie whether she had completely lost her mind.
Charlie, for her part, considered that the conversation was going rather well.
“I’m just saying we could have started with someone who isn’t known for turning their enemies into fucking craters.”
Sitting next to Charlie on the back seat of the limousine, Vaggie had her arms crossed over her chest and watched through the window as the last buildings of Pentagram City passed behind them.
Her spear rested against the door, close enough for her to grab it immediately in case of trouble.
Charlie glanced at the weapon before turning back to her girlfriend.
“You know we’re going to talk to her, not attack her?”
“Yes.”
“Then why did you bring your spear?”
Vaggie slowly turned her head toward her.
“Because we’re going to talk to the Devil of the Red Sky.”
“Tanya Degurechaff,” Charlie corrected.
“Charlie, using her real name doesn’t make this idea any less shitty.”
Charlie pursed her lips slightly and leaned back against the seat.
She had spent a good part of the morning preparing for this meeting.
She had gathered a few documents about the hotel, written several versions of her speech, then finally abandoned her notes when Vaggie pointed out that she never followed a single one all the way through.
Which was false….
Well, not completely false.
But Charlie usually followed the beginning.
After that, she simply happened to think of important things that were not written on them.
“She isn’t as terrible as everyone says.”
Vaggie gave a humorless laugh.
“And what are you basing that on?”
Charlie opened her mouth, then hesitated long enough for Vaggie to raise an eyebrow.
“I did some research.”
“So did I,” Vaggie replied without even a second of hesitation.
“Then you know she almost never starts conflicts.”
“What I mostly know is that most conflicts she takes part in end with a lot fewer buildings than they started with.”
Charlie frowned slightly.
“That’s a very negative way of presenting things.”
“It’s difficult to present an artillery bombardment positively.”
“She also accepted the surrender of Crane’s men.”
Vaggie turned completely toward her.
“After pulverizing half his army.”
“But she accepted it,” Charlie said timidly.
“Charlie…”
“What?
It counts!” she said enthusiastically.
Vaggie brought two fingers to her forehead and began massaging it.
The limousine continued on its way, gradually leaving the densest districts of Pentagram City.
The great neon-covered towers had given way to smaller buildings, then warehouses and vacant lots.
Even the advertisements became rarer as they moved farther from the center.
Charlie looked outside.
She had known Tanya by reputation for a long time.
Practically everyone did.
Some Overlords did everything they could to remain at the center of attention.
They controlled media outlets, organized extravagant parties, appeared on posters, or simply made sure their name was spoken often enough that no one could forget them.
Tanya Degurechaff seemed to do exactly the opposite.
She rarely appeared in public.
She owned no television network, no major club, and no commercial empire flashy enough to cover Pentagram City with her face.
Her territory was relatively small compared to those of some other Overlords and she seemed perfectly satisfied with that situation.
And yet, her name continued to circulate.
The Devil of the Red Sky.
Charlie had found at least nine different explanations regarding the origin of that title and none of them told exactly the same story.
“Do you really think she destroyed an entire city because of a coffee?”
Vaggie stopped massaging her forehead.
“What?”
“I read that yesterday.”
“Where?”
“On a forum.”
Vaggie looked at her with an incredulous expression.
“Charlie, you can’t prepare for a meeting with an Overlord by reading forums.”
“But there were testimonies.”
“From who?”
Charlie thought.
“Someone called ‘PussyDestroyer666.'”
Vaggie closed her eyes.
“For fuck’s sake.”
“He had a lot of posts.”
“That doesn’t make his story true!”
Charlie struggled to hold back a smile.
“So you don’t think she destroyed a city over her coffee?”
Vaggie sighed and looked out the window again.
“No.
I think that’s probably bullshit.”
Charlie smiled victoriously.
“See!”
“I said probably.”
Charlie’s smile diminished slightly.
Vaggie let a few seconds pass before adding, “On the other hand, the story about the guy who interrupted her coffee by launching an attack on her territory, that one is true.”
Charlie blinked.
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
“That’s still different.”
“I knew you’d say that,” Vaggie said with a slight sigh and a crooked smile.
The road gradually entered a forest.
Charlie moved slightly closer to the window.
She had never come this far in this direction.
The chaotic architecture of Pentagram City had completely disappeared behind them and, for the first time since their departure, no glowing signs were visible.
Only dark trees lining a perfectly maintained road.
Vaggie noticed it too and her posture subtly changed.
“We’re already on her territory.”
Charlie looked around.
“How do you know?”
Vaggie pointed at something ahead of them.
A sign stood by the side of the road.
PRIVATE PROPERTY
AUTHORIZED ACCESS ONLY
SURVIVORS WILL BE PROSECUTED
Charlie remained silent as she followed the sign with her eyes.
The limousine passed the sign.
“Ahah…
It’s probably humor.”
Vaggie looked at her.
“Do you really want to test that theory?”
“….No.”
“Good.”
A few hundred meters farther on, Charlie caught sight of the first silhouette between the trees.
A soldier.
She leaned closer to the window.
The individual stood motionless near a small observation post.
His dark uniform evoked something old, almost military, with a long coat and a steel helmet.
Then he turned his head toward the limousine.
Charlie froze slightly.
His face was black.
Not dark.
Black!
As if there were nothing beneath the helmet except a shadow that had taken human form.
No eyes.
No nose.
Only a broad white smile filled with teeth.
The soldier followed the limousine with his face as it passed.
“Oh.
Weird…”
Vaggie had already placed one hand on her spear.
“Yeah.”
A second soldier appeared a little farther away.
Then two more who simultaneously turned their heads toward the vehicle.
Charlie watched them with fascination.
“They’re…”
“Creepy?”
“I was going to say interesting.”
“Of course, sweetheart, they’re interesting…” Vaggie said sarcastically.
Charlie timidly raised her hand toward the window and gave one of the soldiers a small wave.
Vaggie looked at her as if she had lost her mind.
“Charlie, what the fuck are you doing?”
“I’m saying hello.”
“To the eyeless thing staring at us.”
“Just because he doesn’t have eyes doesn’t mean we should be rude.”
The soldier raised his hand with the best smile he could make and waved back.
Charlie immediately turned toward Vaggie with a huge smile.
“See!
See!
See!”
Vaggie remained with her mouth open for a second before looking at the soldier disappearing behind them.
“I don’t know why, but that creeps me out even more.”
After some time, the forest finally opened up in front of them.
Charlie had expected a castle.
Perhaps an enormous fortress covered in cannons, surrounded by flames and statues depicting Tanya crushing her enemies.
The stories about Overlords had probably influenced her imagination slightly.
Reality was much less extravagant.
A wall of stone and metal surrounded a vast property whose main gate stood directly in front of them.
Two guard towers flanked the entrance and several soldiers watched the surroundings.
Beyond the walls, Charlie could see different buildings spread around wide, perfectly maintained roads.
Barracks, warehouses, several workshops and, farther away, what looked like a training ground.
At the center stood a large dark stone manor.
It was not small.
But compared to the absurd monuments some Overlords built to celebrate their own egos, the place seemed almost modest.
What she especially noticed was that it was functional.
Even organized.
Charlie saw an entire unit crossing a courtyard in formation.
“Wooow…”
Vaggie, meanwhile, seemed less and less reassured.
“It’s a fucking military base.”
“With a pretty manor,” Charlie said, clapping her hands twice enthusiastically.
“That’s really not the part I’m worried about.”
The limousine slowed in front of the gate where two soldiers approached their limousine.
The driver lowered his window and exchanged a few words with them.
One of the soldiers checked something on a tablet before turning his empty face toward the back of the vehicle.
Charlie smiled at him.
The soldier remained motionless.
She gave a small wave.
He tilted his head slightly.
Vaggie let out a groan.
“Stop making friends with the demonic army.”
“I’m being polite!”
“You can be polite without adopting the terrifying soldiers of the Overlord we came to see.”
The heavy gates began to open.
Charlie straightened in her seat.
“Okay.
Come on, Vaggie.
It’s going to be fine.”
Vaggie grabbed her spear.
“You always say that right before something goes to shit.”
“That’s not true.”
Vaggie gave her a look.
Charlie thought while tapping her chin with one finger.
“Okay, maybe sometimes.”
The limousine entered the mysterious Overlord’s domain.
The Princess of Hell was early.
I did not yet know whether I should consider that a virtue or a threat to my schedule.
I was walking down the manor’s main staircase when I heard the vehicle stop in front of the entrance.
Two soldiers accompanied me a few meters behind while a third was already waiting near the large doors.
I had been given exactly eleven minutes to prepare.
Which would have been more than enough if my visitor had been anyone else.
But Charlotte Morningstar was not just anyone.
She was Lucifer’s daughter.
That did not mean I had to kneel before her or roll out a red carpet all the way to my office.
Power relations in Hell were more complicated than that and, from what I knew, Charlie rarely used her status to impose anything.
However, there was an important difference between not being impressed by royalty and being stupid enough to insult it for no reason.
I had survived too long to confuse independence with a complete lack of common sense.
I adjusted my cap slightly before reaching the hall.
“Did they say why they’re coming?”
The soldier near the door turned his smile toward me.
“No, Commander.”
“Pfff.
Naturally.”
I walked past him.
“Do they at least have an appointment?”
“No.”
I stopped and turned my head slightly toward the soldier.
“So the Princess of Hell is personally coming to my home, without an appointment and without explaining why.”
“Yes.”
I looked at the doors.
“Fantastic.”
I had known beginnings of wars that were more reassuring.
The soldier placed his hand on the handle.
“Open.”
The large doors swung apart.
The black limousine was parked in front of the steps.
Two soldiers stood on either side of the vehicle while a third opened the rear door.
A young blonde woman stepped out almost immediately.
She was Tall.
Very tall compared to me, which admittedly was not difficult.
She wore a red suit with a white shirt and a black bow tie.
Her face was pale, her cheeks marked by two red circles and her long blonde hair ended in slightly pinkish tips.
I recognized her without difficulty.
Charlie Morningstar.
She looked at the manor, the soldiers, then me.
Her face lit up.
“Hello!”
Her enthusiasm was so immediate that I remained silent for a fraction of a second.
A second woman stepped out behind her.
Gray hair, slightly purplish skin, a much more restrained outfit, and a spear gripped in one hand.
She looked at my soldiers.
Then me and then my soldiers again.
Her expression clearly indicated that she would have preferred to be anywhere else.
I was already starting to like her.
Charlie climbed the first steps before seeming to remember something.
She slowed down, straightened her jacket, and resumed with a little more dignity.
“Hello.
You are Tanya Degurechaff, right?”
I walked down two steps to slightly reduce the distance between us.
“That depends.
If you’re here to ask me for money, I’m her sister.”
Charlie blinked.
The woman behind her moved her lips.
Very slightly, but I had seen it.
Charlie finally understood the joke and laughed.
“No!
No, I’m not here for money.
Well, technically, the hotel always needs money, but that’s not why I’m here and I wasn’t planning to ask you—”
The woman placed a hand on her shoulder.
“Charlie.”
“Yes?”
“Breathe.”
Charlie took a deep breath.
I looked back and forth between the two women.
This promised to be interesting.
The princess composed herself.
“Sorry.
I’m Charlie Morningstar.”
“I know.”
She smiled.
“Yes.
Obviously.
That was stupid.”
“Not particularly.
Introductions remain a useful social convention.”
I looked at her companion.
Charlie followed my gaze.
“Oh!
And this is Vaggie.
She’s my girlfriend and she helps me run the Hazbin Hotel.”
Vaggie tilted her head slightly.
“Degurechaff.”
No smile or bow.
It was simple and direct.
I returned her greeting.
“Vaggie.”
Her gaze briefly dropped toward my soldiers before returning to me.
I could almost hear her thoughts going in every direction inside her head.
Which was a little funny to watch.
I stepped aside from the entrance.
“Since you’ve come all this way, you might as well come in.
I doubt you came to admire my gate.”
Charlie immediately smiled.
“Thank you!”
She climbed the remaining steps.
Vaggie followed her, much more slowly.
When she passed one of my soldiers, he turned his head toward her.
Vaggie tightened her grip on her spear.
“Do they always do that?”
I looked at the soldier.
“Smile?”
“Look at people and follow them with their eyes.”
“They don’t have eyes.”
Vaggie turned her head to look at me again and stared.
I deliberately let two seconds pass.
“But yes.”
Charlie stifled a laugh.
Vaggie, on the other hand, did not seem to find it particularly funny.
I was definitely starting to enjoy this visit.
A little entertainment without explosions never hurt when you had been in Hell for this long.
I seated them in the small sitting room rather than my office.
The choice was deliberate.
An office automatically turned a conversation into a business meeting and I still had no idea what Charlie wanted.
The sitting room, with its armchairs, fireplace, and large windows overlooking the gardens, at least had the advantage of making the situation less formal.
Charlie sat down on the couch.
Vaggie chose the armchair closest to her and placed her spear against the armrest, never really moving her hand away from the weapon.
I sat down across from them.
A soldier entered a few moments later with a tray.
“Coffee, tea?”
Charlie looked at the tray.
“Oh, tea, thank you!”
Vaggie hesitated.
“Coffee.”
The soldier served the drinks before turning toward me.
“The usual.”
He placed my cup in front of me.
Charlie watched the exchange.
“They know what you drink?”
I picked up my cup.
“They’ve lived here for several decades.
I’d be somewhat concerned if they still didn’t know.”
She watched the soldier leave the room.
“Did you really create them yourself?”
Vaggie gave her a small nudge with her elbow.
“We’re not here for that.”
“I know, but it’s interesting!”
I raised one hand slightly.
“Yes.
I created them.”
Charlie’s eyes immediately lit up.
Ooh boy, mistake.
“All of them?
Because there are a lot of them outside and they all have exactly the same face, well I suppose it’s a face even though they don’t really have eyes, and the one near the road waved at me, which was adorable even though Vaggie thinks they’re terrifying, and do they have different personalities or do they share some kind of collective consciousness?
Can they learn?
Because the one at the gate had a tablet and—”
“Charlie.”
Vaggie touched her arm.
The princess stopped.
“Sorry.”
I brought my cup to my lips to hide my amusement.
“They can learn.
Within certain limits.”
Charlie opened her mouth to continue asking a thousand questions.
But Vaggie raised a finger in front of her.
“Later.”
Charlie closed her mouth.
She looked genuinely disappointed.
I decided to take pity on Vaggie.
“So, Princess, what brings you to my home?”
Charlie immediately set down her tea and her expression changed.
The enthusiasm remained, but something more serious appeared behind it.
“The Hazbin Hotel.”
I had suspected as much.
I had heard about the project.
Everyone had heard about it.
Lucifer’s daughter wanted to rehabilitate sinners in order to send them to Heaven.
The first time someone told me about it, I assumed it was a joke.
The second time, I discovered it was not.
I calmly crossed my legs.
“Your rehabilitation project.”
Charlie nodded vigorously.
“Exactly!
Because the Exterminations keep happening and killing thousands of people over and over again doesn’t solve anything.
Hell stays overpopulated, the angels come back, sinners die permanently and everything starts all over again.
So I thought that if we could prove that a soul can change, really change, not just pretend for a few days, maybe it could be accepted into Heaven and that would provide a real alternative to the Exterminations.
That’s why I created the hotel, well technically it already existed as a building before but not as a rehabilitation hotel, and at first it was called the Happy Hotel except we changed the name and—”
She continued.
I took a sip of coffee.
Charlie explained the hotel’s objectives to me.
Then how it worked.
Then returned to the Exterminations.
She mentioned the residents, some activities she wanted to organize, the difficulty of convincing sinners to participate seriously, her advertising problems, and something involving a television interview that had apparently gone very badly.
I finished almost half my cup before she finally took another breath.
“And so I really think people need to be given a chance because yes, a lot of sinners have done horrible things, I’m not that naive even though everyone thinks I am, but if no one ever gives them the opportunity to try to become better, then how can we know that they’re incapable of it?”
She stopped.
The silence that followed seemed almost supernatural.
I looked at Vaggie.
She had the calm expression of someone who had already survived this speech several times.
I turned my attention back to Charlie.
“So, if I understand correctly, you want to convince the inhabitants of Hell to become better people.”
Charlie smiled.
“Yes!!!”
I slowly rotated my cup between my fingers.
“Voluntarily?”
The smile remained in place, although I saw her shoulders sag very slightly.
“Yes.”
I looked out the window.
Two soldiers were crossing the garden.
Farther away, a third was chasing a small demon that had probably managed to get through the fence.
I turned back toward Charlie.
“Princess, I have lived here for several decades.
I’ve seen sinners sell their own friends for a few dollars, families slaughter each other over contracts, and Overlords start wars because someone looked at them the wrong way.
I personally met a man who sold his soul for a car.”
Charlie opened her mouth.
“Was it a nice one?”
Vaggie abruptly turned her head toward her.
“Charlie!”
“What?
I’m asking!”
I had to put my cup down before I laughed into it.
“A Cadillac.
Sold by a tall weird guy with a staff, a horned skull sitting on his head, and carrying around a talking bomb book.”
Charlie shrugged slightly.
“I understand a little better.”
Vaggie stared at her in horror.
“You’re not supposed to understand!”
Charlie gave a small guilty smile before turning back toward me.
“But that’s exactly the point!
It’s because Hell is like this that we have to try something different.”
“And you actually think it can work?”
She did not answer immediately this time.
Her enthusiasm diminished slightly.
But not her conviction.
Charlie took her cup between both hands, but did not drink.
“I don’t know.”
That answer interested me much more than if she had simply said yes.
I leaned slightly forward.
“You don’t know?”
“No.
Not yet.”
She briefly looked at Vaggie, who gave her a small encouraging smile.
“I believe it can work.
I want it to work.
But I’m not going to lie to you and pretend I’ve already managed to send someone to Heaven, because that isn’t true.
We’re still trying to figure out how to do it.
Maybe we’re doing some things completely wrong.
Maybe it’ll take years.
But if no one tries because everyone thinks it’s impossible, then it’ll stay impossible forever.”
I did not answer immediately, preferring to think before giving my opinion or an answer too quickly.
Now that was much more interesting.
If Charlie had told me she possessed a guaranteed method for sending sinners to Heaven, I would have immediately assumed it was a scam, a delusion, or a particularly clumsy political manipulation.
But she had just admitted that she did not know whether her own project could work.
Despite the fact that she could be putting in all that effort for nothing, she was trying anyway.
Lucifer’s daughter was genuinely devoting her time to testing a hypothesis that practically all of Hell considered absurd.
I had known scientists who were less stubborn.
And yet those guys really were crazy.
But one question came to mind that I would really like to know the answer to.
“Why me?”
Charlie seemed surprised.
“Sorry?”
“You could have gone to see dozens of other people.
Some Overlords have more money, contacts, or public influence than I do.
And yet you crossed a good part of the Ring to come all the way here.
Why?”
Charlie exchanged a glance with Vaggie.
The latter sighed.
“I told her you’d ask.”
Charlie straightened up.
“Because you’re respected.”
I raised an eyebrow with a small amused smile at the corner of my lips.
“Feared would probably be more accurate.”
“The two aren’t mutually exclusive.”
My smile widened slightly.
Good point.
Charlie continued, but more slowly this time.
“And because you aren’t tied to any of the major Overlord groups.
You don’t work with the Vees, you aren’t trying to control the city, you don’t spend all your time fighting to gain territory and… you honor your agreements.”
I stopped smiling.
She had really done her research.
“I wish more people took that last part seriously.”
“So do I.”
Vaggie gave her a look but Charlie continued before she could intervene.
“I’m not asking you to give me your soul or sign a contract or even publicly say that you think I’m right.
I just want you to come see the hotel.
Meet the people who live there and see what we’re trying to do.
After that, if you still think it’s completely stupid, you can tell me.”
“I could already tell you now.”
Charlie gave a small nervous laugh.
“Yes, but you didn’t.”
I looked into her eyes for a moment.
She had made another good point.
Damn, that was annoying.
I stood up and slowly walked to the window, my cup in hand.
Behind me, no one spoke.
The proposal remained absurd.
The redemption of sinners went against everything I had observed since my arrival.
A human soul died, appeared here, and remained here until an angelic weapon eventually destroyed it.
That was how things worked.
Or, more precisely, that was how everyone assumed they worked.
I knew the universe well enough to know that a rule considered absolute could simply be a rule that no one had yet managed to bypass.
I had died once before meeting an entity claiming to be God.
I had died a second time before landing in a Hell that looked absolutely nothing like what that same entity had shown me.
I had discovered that souls could fuel my magic, that I could create soldiers from infernal energy, and that space itself could be cooperative enough to let artillery pieces pass through if I asked it correctly.
At this point, declaring something impossible simply because no one had done it yet seemed intellectually lazy to me.
That did not mean Charlie was right.
It simply meant that I wanted to know how far she could go before reality exploded in her face.
I turned around.
“Your project is interesting.”
Charlie immediately lit up.
“Really?”
“Interesting does not mean credible.”
Her enthusiasm dropped a notch.
“Oh.”
“But I admit I’m curious to see what you’re actually trying to do.”
The smile returned.
Even bigger than before.
Shit, I need to stop this quickly.
“However, I have no particular reason to leave my domain to—”
“You should come!”
I stopped.
Before I even noticed it, Charlie had leaned toward me, both hands resting on her knees.
“Just once!
You don’t even have to participate in anything.
I can show you around, show you the rooms, the lounge, the common areas, well some rooms are occupied so obviously we won’t go into them without permission, but you could meet Angel and Husk and Niffty.
Alastor is often there too even though technically he kind of does whatever he wants and I could explain our program much better there because I don’t have all my documents here and—”
“Princess.”
She stopped.
“I just said that—”
“I know, but a visit doesn’t commit you to anything!
You could stay for an hour, even less if you want, although it would probably be difficult to show you everything in less than an hour but we can do a quick tour, and if you really hate the place you can leave immediately.
I could even prepare an itinerary for you so we don’t waste time!”
I looked at Vaggie, who had sunk as deeply as possible into her armchair.
Our eyes met.
She very slightly shrugged her shoulders.
Yeah, okay.
So no help was coming from that side.
“Charlie.”
“Yes?!”
“I barely go to Pentagram City anymore for a reason.”
“I know!
And I completely respect that.
Well, I’m trying to.
It’s just that you said you were curious and the best way to satisfy that curiosity would be to come and see it directly instead of relying on what people say, because there’s a lot of bullshit said about the hotel and you probably know better than anyone how completely false rumors can be.”
I narrowed my eyes slightly.
“You heard the coffee story.”
Charlie blushed.
Vaggie looked away.
“Maybe,” she said quietly.
“I have never destroyed a city because of a coffee.”
“I knew it!”
Vaggie rolled her eyes.
“You didn’t know that twenty minutes ago.”
Charlie ignored her and immediately turned back toward me.
“So?
A visit?”
I returned to my armchair and placed my cup on the table.
“No.”
“Please?”
“No.”
“Just one hour.”
“Princess—”
“Forty-five minutes?”
I looked her in the eyes for three seconds.
“You’re negotiating the duration of a visit I haven’t agreed to.”
Charlie had the decency to look slightly embarrassed.
“Thirty minutes?”
Vaggie let out a muffled laugh before bringing a hand to her mouth.
I slowly turned my head toward her.
“I’m glad this amuses you.”
“Sorry.”
She did not look sorry at all.
Charlie stood up.
For a moment, I thought she had finally understood.
Then she clasped her hands in front of her.
Oh no.
“Please, Tanya.”
The title had disappeared.
Not “Overlord Degurechaff” or “Madam.”
Tanya.
Her expression had changed as well.
The enthusiasm was still there, but behind it was something much more sincere.
“I’m not asking you to believe in me.
I’m not even asking you to help me.
Just come and see.
If after that you think I’m wasting my time, I’ll leave you alone.”
I looked at her, then turned toward Vaggie.
The latter had the intelligence to say nothing.
I turned my attention back to Charlie.
I had resisted interrogations, bombardments, desperate offensives, and several decades of negotiations with demons, most of whom would have sold their own mothers to get a tax reduction.
Today, I was discovering a new form of war of attrition.
Charlie Morningstar’s enthusiasm.
And the worst part was that her proposal had already piqued my curiosity.
I wanted to see that hotel.
I wanted to observe the residents.
Most of all, I wanted to know whether the princess had actually built something behind all her pretty words or whether her experiment would collapse the moment it was confronted with reality.
Refusing purely on principle would have been just as stupid as accepting purely to make her happy.
I let out a long sigh.
“Very well.”
Charlie remained motionless.
“Very well… what?”
“I agree to visit your hotel.”
Her eyes widened.
“Really?!”
“One visit.”
“Yes!”
“I’m not agreeing to any contract.”
“Of course!”
“I’m not promising any support.”
“No problem!”
“And if your hotel turns out to be as absurd as I suspect, I’m leaving.”
“Absolutely!
You can leave whenever you want, obviously, and I promise no one will force you to participate in anything.
Well, Niffty might try to clean your clothes without asking but I’ll tell her not to do that and Angel will probably say something inappropriate, he says inappropriate things a lot, but he’s nice once you get to know him and Husk can seem unpleasant at first but—”
I looked at Vaggie.
She looked at me.
For a few seconds, a silent understanding passed between us.
Then she whispered, “You get used to it.”
I looked at Charlie, who was now continuing to explain why the hotel bar absolutely should not influence my opinion of the rehabilitation program.
I slowly picked up my cup again.
“I doubt it.”
Vaggie smiled.
For the first time since their arrival, she seemed completely relaxed.
I was beginning to suspect that this woman had let me agree solely to share her suffering.
Charlie finally took another breath.
“So… tomorrow?”
I nearly choked on my coffee.
“Tomorrow?”
“Yes!
Well, if you’re available.
Otherwise the day after tomorrow, or next week, but tomorrow would be great because everyone will probably be there and I could prepare—”
I raised a hand.
She stopped.
“Tomorrow works.”
Her smile became so wide that, for a second, it almost rivaled those of my soldiers.
“Perfect!”
I looked at my cup.
Then at the Princess of Hell.
Finally at Vaggie, who once again had that little smile that was far too satisfied.
A few hours earlier, my main problem had been a leak under my sink.
Tomorrow, I was voluntarily going to enter a hotel filled with sinners to observe an experiment aimed at sending damned souls to Heaven.
I was starting to miss the plumbing.