On the day of the signal song shoot, the trainees boarded the bus before the sun had even risen.
Our destination was a large studio on the outskirts of Gyeonggi Province.
Some watched the choreography video over and over with their earphones in. Others closed their eyes and murmured the lyrics.
I, too, looked out the window and tapped out the beat with my fingers.
Today, of all days, I absolutely couldn't make a mistake.
The moment we arrived at the studio, everyone began rushing around.
“Let's get ten of them into makeup first!”
“Seat them wherever there's an opening for hair!”
Half the trainees had their makeup done while the other half had their hair styled.
With the staff, trainees, and camera crew all mixed together in the cramped space, it was a battlefield.
Irritated remarks flew back and forth. Of course, as soon as the cameras came in, the atmosphere changed as though nothing had happened.
“We meet again?”
I turned toward the familiar voice. It was the hair designer who'd helped with my makeover.
“Hello. I've gotten a lot of compliments on my hair thanks to you.”
“Really? I'm glad.”
She smiled and nodded.
“See? I knew I had an eye for it.”
“Thank you. I'm in your hands again today.”
“Of course.”
She began arranging my hair with practiced hands.
The signal song, ‘Boy's Code,’ shared the program's name and captured its central concept: boys pushing one another aside and competing to pass through the gateway to debut.
That was why they'd dressed us in school uniforms with black bulletproof vests over them.
‘School uniforms, techwear—they've mixed in everything they thought would work.’
The effect was like contestants in one of the death games that had been popular for a time.
“Is there a reason you chose scar makeup as your special item?”
The designer asked as she worked the curling iron.
“I thought anything attached to my body might get in the way when I danced.”
“That's true.”
She nodded.
“And—”
I added without giving it much thought.
“If I'm covered in blood, I'll stand out, at least.”
The curling iron stopped at once.
“Pfft, wait—”
The designer lowered her head, her shoulders shaking.
‘Why is she suddenly laughing?’
“Sorry.”
She barely managed to stifle her laughter and took hold of my hair again.
“It's the face you made when you said it.”
Just then—
SIZZLE-
The curling iron slipped.
“Uh……?”
In the mirror, the ends of my hair stuck out on one side.
The way they shot straight up toward the sky looked oddly familiar.
‘This looks like a home-shopping blooper meme.’
“Ah…….”
A groan escaped me before I could help it. That was how shocking I looked.
“Oh, I'm sorry!”
The designer quickly drew her hand away.
“No, wait, this—”
She was in the middle of speaking when she looked in the mirror again.
“Pfft.”
She burst out laughing again.
“Ah, I'm really sorry. What's wrong with me today—”
She tried to hold back her laughter, but it was already too late.
“It's all right.”
“You're not angry?”
“Why would I…… be angry?”
“I mean, look what I've done to your hair—”
I shrugged.
“I'm used to this sort of thing.”
“What do you mean?”
“I have an older sister.”
“Ah~”
She looked as though that one sentence explained everything.
‘What exactly is it about older sisters?’
Compared with Yu Seong-a's doll games, this was nothing.
“You've got a baby's face, but you talk like an old man.”
“I hear that a lot.”
Perhaps she felt bad for laughing so much, because she put real care into finishing my hair after that.
“Wow, you really look like a different person.”
Even Han Sang-yun said that.
“You look great today too, Sang-yun, sir.”
“I keep telling you to drop the ‘sir.’”
Han Sang-yun laughed and shook his head.
Once the styling was finished, the trainees gathered one by one.
Boys who had lost their names and were called by codes instead.
To suit the concept, large numbers were stamped on our bulletproof vests in place of our names.
CODE 1.
CODE 4.
The atmosphere was distinctly different from most survival shows, where everyone wore school uniforms and name tags.
In fact, ‘Boys Code’ hadn't even revealed the trainees' names until the first-round self-introduction performances.
‘We were called only by our codes.’
They were concept fanatics through and through.
“Ugh, this is kind of creepy.”
Someone muttered softly.
They weren't wrong.
The same clothes, similar styling, and numbers instead of names made us look like products stamped out in a factory.
“Whoa…….”
“This is insane. It's fuc…… no, it's enormous!”
As we entered the stage, exclamations erupted from all sides. I took in my surroundings with a familiar eye.
I'd watched the signal song video so many times that even though I'd never been here before, the space didn't feel unfamiliar.
“Wow—”
Kang I-yul soon composed his expression after staring in open amazement.
‘Right. You want to look cool right now.’
A huge cube structure stood in the center of the stage, like glass boxes stacked in tiers.
Its twenty compartments were all the same shape, but they differed in size.
“Is that the center?”
The largest compartment stood in the exact middle: Code S.
From there, the compartments grew smaller toward the outside.
Code A, B, then C.
At the very edge, even spreading both arms wide felt cramped.
It was like a display stand with people arranged by grade.
‘And with this layout—’
In a wide shot, the people on the outside would naturally be pushed out of the frame.
The stage itself said it without anyone having to explain.
Who was the main character, and who was the background.
‘But that's not all.’
Complaints broke out among the Code C group.
“Isn't this going too far?”
“How are we supposed to dance in there……?”
“And there's one more announcement—”
A staff member picked up the microphone.
‘Here it comes.’
“The lights will stay off for the C group throughout the first verse.”
“What?”
The trainees' faces stiffened at once.
“We won't have any lights?”
“What, does that mean we won't be visible?”
“And the center will get an exclusive solo shot during the highlight.”
This time, groans erupted. Someone simply collapsed into a sitting position.
‘Cruel.’
No lights meant losing the entire first verse. It would be too dark for their fancams to capture them properly, either.
“Then why did we even practice?”
“This is too much, seriously…….”
The setup had drawn harsh criticism for being too cruel when the program aired.
But at the same time—
‘It worked.’
In an idol survival-show market already saturated with programs, this stage had made a strong first impression.
Then I heard a light laugh.
“Sweet as hell. We can rest for the first verse and go all out in the second.”
‘Oh, dear.’
One trainee had actually chosen that approach.
‘He got cursed out plenty before the show even started airing.’
“All right, everyone, move to the stage.”
“Uh, could I use the restroom first……?”
“Now?”
“I'm too nervous…… I'll be right back!”
“Make it quick!”
“Yes!”
The restroom was just an excuse. I wanted a moment to see Kang I-yul in the A group.
Before my regression, Kang I-yul had been in the B group and had bumped into the walls several times in the signal song video. Each time, I'd cursed Go Jae-seong, who was in the A group, for no good reason.
His arms and legs were even shorter than Kang I-yul's, so surely B would have been good enough for him.
But now it was different. Kang I-yul had room to spare even with his arms and legs fully extended. He moved freely inside his compartment.
“……It suits you.”
I fought back the sting in my eyes.
And I made myself a promise.
‘Today, this will be the smallest stage of your life.’
“Trainees who haven't gone up yet, get moving!”
“Yes, sorry!”
At the staff member's urging, I hurried toward the stage too.
“All right, we'll start filming right after the camera rehearsal.”
FLASH-
The lights came on above my head.
“……!”
The piercing white light made my vision blur for a moment.
RING-
A low ringing sounded deep in my ears.
I braced myself against the wall and took a brief moment to steady my breathing.
“We're starting the signal song shoot. Take one!”
As soon as the clapperboard snapped shut, the beat began.
THRUM-
Vibrations rose from the floor, passed through my knees, and reached my fingertips. I counted as I always did.
Eight, nine, ten—
[Boom!]
I stretched out my arm.
Once again, the timing was exact. The first take ended without a problem.
The problem was that this shoot wouldn't be over just because I got it right.
“Please fix the lighting cues for groups A and B.”
“And C group, the camera catches all that rushed movement at the start of the second verse.”
Again.
“Take two.”
Again.
“Take three.”
And again.
“Take seven.”
By about the tenth take, my body felt noticeably heavier.
“Come on, everyone. Let's do this like it's our last take!”
“Yes…….”
The breath I exhaled was hot.
My vision kept wavering and clearing, but I steadied my breathing again. I had an urge to shout at everyone to get it together, if only to save one person's life. The words rose all the way to my throat.
‘Please, let's finish it this time, you bastards…….’
“Signal song, take eleven!”
The intro started again.
THRUM-
This time, I didn't feel the vibration. It echoed inside my head. My stomach churned.
Even so, I counted the same way.
Eight, nine, ten.
[Boom!]
My arm shot out.
‘Was I late?’
No, I wasn't late. My judgment was growing hazy.
Ironically, the heat of the lights meant to make me shine only made me nauseous.
I kept going through the movements as if I were clearing a quest.
‘I really think I'm going to throw up…….’
I cut off the thought and moved my body.
The next movement, then the one after that. I kept linking them together.
‘If I break the chain, it's over.’
My mind went blank.
Only sensation remained.
[Another shattered
Secret before my eyes
Can't stop it
The revolution has already begun]
We'd reached the second verse before I knew it. As if all the suffering so far had been a practice game, the real hurdle was only beginning now.
Nausea surged with every move. My strength drained away.
‘Hang on.’
Even so, I didn't stop.
I remembered getting out of the car while clutching my shattered shoulder. Even on the brink of death, I'd moved to find out whether Kang I-yul was alive.
‘This much…….’
Wasn't a reason to stop.
At last, I opened my mouth, just as I had when I'd practiced singing as if my life depended on it.
My voice would be drowned out by the recorded track anyway. So I sang even louder.
[Make a new history
Beyond this door
A brilliantly shining
New world-]
My voice cracked. The sound came out ragged.
Still—
I kept going.
At the highlight, I popped my chest hard three times.
THUD-
THUD-
THUD-
I couldn't even feel the pain anymore. Just as a stop line would be no obstacle to a truck whose brakes had already failed.
[Keep on moving
Never stop
Break it]
The end was approaching.
‘Just a little, a little more.’
The finish line wasn't far away.
[To open this door
The only code
Boy's code]
I struck the final pose. Holding still was even harder.
It was as if I'd caught a top spinning furiously. The faint vibration that had surrounded my whole body grew stronger. My hands began to tremble.
Even so, I kept my eyes on the camera to the end.
‘Ending fairy…….’
A hollow laugh caught in my throat.
“Cut!”
The director's voice rang out.
“Okay—the group signal song shoot is finished. Good work, everyone—”
It was over.
THUMP. The strength went out of my legs. I sank to the floor. My stomach lurched, and I began to retch.
‘Something's wrong.’
I was breathing, but it felt as though no air was getting in.
My body slowly tipped to the side.
“Uh……?”
THUD-
My view flipped over. Cameras, lights, and then the ceiling.
I couldn't move my body. Like a robot that had been switched off, I couldn't so much as twitch a finger.
All I could do was blink.
‘Again……’
It was a familiar feeling. The helplessness I'd felt on the road just before I died.
Cold fear crept up my throat.
‘Ah, no, this can't happen…….’
My vision wavered.
“Wait!”
“Someone's collapsed!”
“Trainee Yu Seong-woo, are you okay?”
“Call 119!”
As the voices faded, my vision went completely black.