Slowly, over the course of two hours, the distant sounds of gunfire and death began to wane. As they did so, I found more and more bodies. Some streets appeared to have been congregation spots for people who were confused and frightened. For every area that had evidence of people packing things and moving out on foot, there were half a dozen that showed they never had a chance before the monsters came for them.
Thankfully, I also found survivors in some of those scenarios. When I did, I told them what little information I knew, showed them how to use the dead monsters to make weapons, and then sent them towards the school.
The sky was starting to turn orange when I finally decided it was time for me to head that way myself. I’d killed fourteen more squirrels so far, looted all of them, and put their teeth and armoured plates in a second backpack I found.
The only problem was, if I didn’t want my friends to be upset, I needed to find out how I was supposed to transform back into my old self. As for my gear, I’d leave the pack that everyone saw me with hidden in a bush somewhere and wander in with the loot bag, saying I met Silver and she gave me the bag to take to the… camp?
Whatever, nobody would make the connection. The idea of someone getting their gender transformed like that wasn’t something that people really thought about out here in the middle of nowhere. People certainly didn't go through life looking for alter egos behind every person they met.
The suburb of Edgewood was built on a low, meandering ridgeline that ran from northwest to southeast. The top was rounded off into a soft plateau. Most of the suburb’s services were on that plateau, along with the high school and elementary school. I’d started out the day at home, which was towards the southeast of the ridgeline where it devolved into several hills. Now though, I was at the northwestern tip where it dove down to the city centre and the river.
As I walked back up the hill towards the school, I found an old oil drum hidden behind a shop, and threw my pack inside — minus the monster parts, which I put into a black garbage bag.
With the pack stashed, my next task was to figure out how to transform back into my usual self. I was only two or three blocks from my destination, but it was getting dark.
I knew of only one entity that might know, but she was so intimidating I’d been trying not to think about her. There was a goddess watching over my shoulder now. You know, just casually.
“Uh… hi, Chelu, are you listening?” I whispered, putting my hands together like I was praying. Because, you know, I was actually praying.
“Oh, disgusting, what are you doing with your hands? Do I look like I have a pole up my ass and a desire to cut all the other gods off from their followers?”
I dropped my hands. “Oh, sorry…”
“Additionally, you’re my angel, not some middle aged housewife who cheated on her husband and is going through a rough divorce. As my angel, you can expect a certain degree of informality between us. For one, you’ll always get a response if you speak to me, and secondly… well, I’ve forgotten, but that’s not the point.”
“Right,” I began, but she continued speaking over the top of me. Well, speaking was a relative term. She was actually transmitting directly to my mind.
“Honestly, after Aten pulled his coup d'etat, the expected relationship between a god and their angels was warped beyond all recognition. I miss the days where I could lead my angels down to Earth for a nice day of slaughter and sex. Slaughtering the unjust, of course… I’m not Aten,” she said, and my face flushed. Slaughter and sex? I remembered the forms she spoke about, but just what kind of goddess was she?
Clearing my throat, I said, “You don’t seem to like this Aten guy very much.”
“Oh, don’t even get me started! He made it out like he’s the saviour and creator of everything and everyone, how arrogant do you have to be? He’s the god of only one star, and he was the one that created the universe? Pah! He’s lucky the heavy hitters are off fighting their big war or he’d be very sorry,” She rambled, only stopping to take a breath. Aten was the god of our sun? Man, what kind of weird, fucked up world was this now?
“I’m really sorry to interrupt,” I said quickly, before she could keep going. “I was just wondering if you knew how I could change my forms? The angel who gave me her, uh… I think it was called spirit? Anyway, the angel who gave me that said I’d be able to swap back and forth. I kinda need to do that now.”
“Oh, no, you didn't get her Spirit — that's something else. You got her power, her… Grace. Hm, transforming? Try flipping your ‘class’ inside out? Treat it like one of those adorable plushies that can flip and it has a cute smile on one side and a sad frowning face on the other.”
What. Huh? I mean… I knew of those plushies, but this crazy goddess lady knew what one was? This was totally wild. Still, I should be able to… oh. There it was, my class which was all nice and full at level three now, actually had an inside to it.
So carefully, I grabbed it with two imaginary grippers and flipped it. My body began to change almost immediately. First, faint silver light enveloped me and I began to shrink in some areas while growing in others. Then my strength began to fade, and my hands went from being perfect and pretty, to still thin, but also knobbly and dull. Just the way I remembered them.
When it was done, I had an awful cold rock sitting in my stomach. Had this body always felt so… awkward and heavy?
Rolling my shoulders, I tried to mentally fit myself back into my body, but it just felt really really off. It was like… it was like trying to put a dirty, wet shirt back on after you'd taken it off and gotten dry.
Right… and the bra was still on. Sighing, I pulled off my dad's hoodie, then my tee and finally the bra, before shoving it into the pack.
Nobody saw me wearing the tee, and jeans were jeans, so I guess I'd just wander into the high school with it and the backpack. Wait, boots. The ones I was wearing were recognisable enough to cause trouble. With a grimace, I pulled them off and stashed them with the pack.
I just needed to… start walking… in bare feet. I saw a… a body with shoes that might fit me, just around the front of the shop. Ugh. Taking a dead person’s shoes felt wrong.
Feeling shitty and depressed for multiple reasons, I trudged out from behind the store and searched for the body. There. A middle aged man I vaguely recognised was splayed out in the entryway to the shop.
I shot him a wordless look of apology and carefully removed his sneakers. Ew. He smelled, and so did the shoes. Still… it was the apocalypse, so they went on my feet, no matter how uncomfortable it made me.
Then, with a tired sigh, I turned and carefully made my way further towards the school. Why did walking three blocks feel like such an insane task? God, it was like all my energy was sapped away the moment I transformed. Hold on — my stats!
My attention turned inwards, and I saw… huh. My tinker class was level three too. My attributes were all way lower, back to their levels before the angelic transformation. Still no abilities for my tinker either. Man, my angel-bunny form was so much better.
Also, every time I took a step, I got distracted by the gross feeling of my hairy thighs brushing together. Fuck, why was it so bad? Why? I'd lived with this feeling for years and now suddenly I couldn't stand it anymore? Every time I took a step, my brain tried to crawl out of my skull. It's not like Silver didn't have hair on her legs either — I hadn't exactly stopped to shave them — but the hair hadn't so… bristly like it was on this body.
Then, I coughed. The deep, bassy sound of my regular voice hit me like a train and I had to stop in my tracks to clutch for something, anything, to steady myself. What was happening? Why did my body feel so… so alien, so lethargic?
I shivered and closed my eyes, hugging my arms to myself… hold on. The hairs on my arms, and the skin beneath them — did they feel softer than they used to? I felt a faint smile touch my lips, and that too surprised me. Soft arms made me feel better about myself? Maybe I was just imagining things, but I'd take it. Anything to feel normal again in this weird flesh suit.
With a deep, calming breath, I desperately shoved all of my unsettling feelings to the side and took another step — then another.
I should have stayed still.
Out from a side alley, a hideous bearlike form rushed towards me. Grey, black and white fur was augmented by thick craggy stone protrusions. Over and through the fur and stone, scraggy plants clung, giving the creature the look of having been formed partially out of a mountain.
Oh god, oh fuck! This was not good! I needed to transform! Right now!
"Hey! Duck!"
Huh? Did the… I think it was a mutated raccoon, but did it just talk?
"Duck, fuckwit!"
I ducked, and a little paper packet flew over my head. It burst when it hit the monster, and a tangle of fiery vines lurched out of it. Suddenly, the raccoon was rooted to the spot while its flesh cooked.
"Time to run! Those vines won't kill it and I don't have enough to take it on." My saviour called again, rushing past me, grabbing my hand along the way.
Who… who… oh! I recognised this girl from school! Wait… oh no, it was ‘HAG’! Hot angry goth girl just saved me. Shit.