Wos sprawled on the sofa, still wearing that excited smile from earlier.
A 5,000-dollar advance and a 20% royalty split, this was like manna falling from heaven!
“Tom, Jerry, did you hear that?” Wos excitedly waved both hands (～￣▽￣)～.
“We’re going to get rich! No more eating that expired canned food!”
Tom nodded elegantly and straightened his tailcoat with a paw.
As a cat with standards, he had long been sick of cheap cat food.
Jerry started dancing a little jig on the coffee table, waving his tiny paws, clearly happy about the good news too, since now he could eat his favorite cheese.
“Once we get the advance, we’re moving somewhere better!” The more Wos thought about it, the more excited he got.
“We’ll buy a big house, the kind with a garden! Tom, you can sunbathe in the garden, and Jerry, you can have a little room of your own!”
Just as Wos was lost in his beautiful fantasies, a familiar golden light suddenly lit up beneath his feet.
[Ding!]
[Summoning System activated again.]
[Randomly summoning a character…]
“Again?” Wos blinked.
“Who will it be this time? I hope it’s someone reliable…”
Before he could finish, the magic circle on the floor began to emit a dazzling glow.
Tom and Jerry stopped celebrating and gathered around the magic circle curiously.
In the light, a figure slowly emerged.
First to appear was a head of long, water-blue hair, sparkling in the glow.
Next came an exquisite face, skin as white as snow, features so perfect they looked like a work of art.
“Wow, this summoned character looks pretty good!” Wos’s eyes lit up.
“She’s so pretty, she must be someone reliable…”
Then he saw the expression on that face.
Vacant blue eyes, a slightly open little mouth, and that dopey look that clearly said “I’m an idiot!”
Wos’s smile froze instantly.
This expression, this hair color, this aura…
“No way…”
The magic circle kept glowing, and the summoned figure’s body gradually took shape.
A white dress, a translucent water-blue feathered robe, and a figure with absurdly perfect proportions.
Wos’s face turned whiter than the wall.
“Aaaaah!!! Holy crap! It’s Aqua! Σ(っ°Д°;)っ”
That’s right, the one being summoned was the Water Goddess from *KonoSuba: God’s Blessing on This Wonderful World*, the one nicknamed the “Useless Goddess,” Aqua!
She was a massive troublemaker!
The kind who screws things up everywhere she goes!
“No! Absolutely not!” Wos instantly shot up from the sofa.
At this moment, Aqua had only half of her body summoned, and she was looking around at the surroundings with a baffled expression.
“Huh? (⊙?⊙)? Where is this? Wasn’t I guiding a man named Satou Kazuma in the void space?” Aqua blinked her big eyes.
“And who are you guys…”
Before she could finish, Wos rushed over.
“System! Give me a refund! I don’t want this one!” Wos yelled while reaching out both hands to press down on Aqua’s face, desperately trying to push her back into the magic circle.
“Mmph mmph mmph!? ＜(‵□′)＞───Ｃε(┬﹏┬)3” Aqua’s mouth was suddenly covered, and she waved her hands in a panic.
“Mmph mmph mmph mmph mmph!”
“Go back go back go back!” Wos used all his strength.
“I want a refund! This one won’t do! Give me a different one! (?Д?*)?”
Tom and Jerry watched from the side with their jaws dropped.
This was the first time they had seen Wos resist a summoned character this much.
Aqua struggled with all her might, her little fists flailing wildly as she tried to push Wos’s hands away.
But her strength was clearly no match for a desperate Wos.
“System! Do you hear me?! I don’t want this walking disaster!” Cold sweat broke out on Wos’s forehead.
“My wonderful life can’t be ruined by her!”
However, the summoning magic circle didn’t stop because of Wos’s protest.
The light grew brighter, and Aqua’s body became more and more solid.
“Mmph mmph mmph!” Aqua’s voice grew clearer and clearer, clearly about to be fully summoned.
“Noooooo!” Wos let out a desperate roar.
“I don’t want to live a life where I clean up messes every single day! Unforgivable! (///￣皿￣)○～”
But it was all too late.
“Boom!”
With a soft pop, Aqua fully appeared in the room.
Wos, having pushed too hard, was bounced back and fell on the floor.
“Huff… huff…” Aqua gasped for breath and straightened her messed-up hair.
“How can you be so rough?! This goddess almost got smothered by you!”
After saying that, she looked around and frowned.
“What is this place? It’s so run-down! And there’s a weird smell!”
Wos lay on the floor, staring blankly at the ceiling, and started muttering to himself:
“It’s over… it’s all over… my wonderful life is leaving me… bye-bye, my life~”
“Huh? What’s wrong with you?” Aqua crouched down curiously to look at Wos.
“Were you overwhelmed by this goddess’s beauty? It’s fine, lots of people react like that the first time they see me.”
“It’s over, it’s over, it’s over…” Wos kept repeating.
“The 5,000 dollars is gone… the house is gone… the stable life is gone… ah-ba ah-ba (ˉ﹃ˉ)…”
[Summoned character detected: Aqua]
[Beginning random ability copy]
[Copying…]
[Underwater Survival]: Aqua’s exclusive skill.
You don’t need to breathe and can move freely underwater.
(One of the few abilities of Aqua’s that has never been screwed up.)
Tom and Jerry looked at each other and saw worry in each other’s eyes.
Although they didn’t know what was wrong with this new woman, judging from Wos’s reaction, it was clearly not good news.
“Hello there!” Aqua noticed Tom and Jerry, and her eyes instantly lit up.
“What cute little animals! Can you talk?”
Tom cautiously took a step back, and Jerry hid behind Tom.
“Aw, don’t be scared!” Aqua reached out a hand, wanting to pet Tom.
“This goddess loves little animals the most! Especially you, kitty, you’re so good-looking!”
Tom hurriedly waved his hands in refusal.
“Huh? You really can understand me!” Aqua got even more excited.
“Amazing! What breed are you? I’ve never seen anything like you in the Heavenly Realm!”
Wos finally recovered from his despair, slowly sat up, and looked at Aqua, who was busy pestering Tom and Jerry.
“Aqua…” His voice carried deep exhaustion.
“Do you know who you are?”
“Of course I do!” Aqua proudly puffed out her chest.
“This goddess is Aqua, the Goddess of Water! The most beautiful, the smartest, and the most powerful goddess in the Heavenly Realm!”
Hearing the words “the smartest,” the corner of Wos’s eye couldn’t help twitching.
“Then do you know where you are right now?” Wos continued.
“Well…” Aqua looked around.
“It looks like the mortal realm? But why is it so run-down? Isn’t the mortal realm supposed to be prosperous?”
“This is New York, America, in 2007.” Wos rubbed his temples.
“And this isn’t your original world. This is another universe, called the Marvel Universe.”
“The Marvel Universe?” Aqua tilted her head.
“What’s that? It sounds impressive!”
Looking at Aqua’s innocent expression, Wos felt his blood pressure skyrocketing.
This world had Iron Man, Captain America, Thor, the Hulk…
and all kinds of villains too, Thanos, Loki, HYDRA…
And now, this chaotic world had one more Aqua.
Wos could already picture the future scenes:
Aqua flooding half of New York with a flood spell, purifying the Mississippi River into holy water and wiping out the fish, or shouting “I’m a goddess, you must worship me!” in front of the Hulk.
And then, just like Loki, she’d be grabbed by the feet by the Hulk and smashed around like a pendulum until she was a mess…
and honestly, that outcome was something Wos desperately wanted to see.
“It’s over.” Wos collapsed onto the floor again.
“This time it’s really, completely over o(TヘTo).”