“Let-!
Let go!”
“Ah, pleeease!”
She must have been an Elf Queen, her grip was no joke.
No matter how much I shook my leg to get her off, she showed no signs of letting go.
I didn’t think I could do it with my own strength, so I called for our Meracle employee, Kim Yang.
“Hey, Kim Yang!
Come in!”
“Ye-yes, Boss?”
“Drag this thing out of here!
Throw her outside the building!”
“Whaat?
Bo-Boss!
Is this an esteemed client?”
“No!
Not anymore!
She was a senile old woman!”
“A-an old woman?”
Kim Yang is a Beastkin.
She’s from the 5th Floor of the Tower, and since I brought her over as a foreign worker, her speech is a little slurred.
I named her ‘Kim Yang’ because of the Sheep Horns sprouting from her head and her fluffy white hair.
[1]
“Throw her outside!”
“Ou-outside?”
“Ah, nooo!
I refuse!
Just you try it!
I’m going to go to a cafe with a young boy, eat cake, and order couple’s drinks!”
“Agh!
Hey, Kim Yang, what are you doing!
You don’t want your paycheck?
Outside-!”
“Ou-outside!
Ram-!
Ram-ming!”
Kim Yang immediately stuck her head out and charged.
‘Ah, for fuck’s sake-.’
Suddenly, the fact that Kim Yang’s paycheck was three days late flashed before my eyes like a revolving lantern.
Crash-!
Bang-!
*
“Ahem.”
Lenea, the Elf Queen I ultimately failed to kick out.
She sat cross-legged on the chair, staring this way.
“I’m counting on you.
I heard Meracle is the best in this industry.
And that you never turn away a client who comes to you.”
A sigh escaped me on its own.
No matter how competent a Matchmaker I was, what was I supposed to do with a 1,900-year-old grandmother?
“Me-Meracle not the best.”
“Hey, Kim Yang?!”
Kim Yang’s bombshell, dropped while she was serving tea.
I tried to stop her urgently, but it was already too late.
The 1,900-year-old Elf Queen, whose hearing was still top-notch, didn’t miss it.
“Huh?
No way.
On the 4th Floor where I’m from, rumors that Meracle is the best are widespread.”
“4th Floor, no cellphone.
4th Floor, barbarians.”
“Barbarians…”
She looked indignant, but it wasn’t wrong.
Unlike the 3rd Floor, Earth, the 4th Floor is a typical classic medieval fantasy world.
With no relays, TVs, or cellphones, the transfer of information is limited.
“So.
I spread rumor.
That Meracle is the best.”
“…”
Lenea glared, her eyes wide with anger.
Only now did she realize she had been deceived.
“No wonder-!
An office with just two rooms and a single foreign worker?!
I thought it was far too shabby to be the best in the industry!”
“A-ahem.
It’s not a lie.
Compared to the matchmaking agencies on the 4th Floor, we are the best.”
“Because there are no matchmaking agencies on the 4th Floor!”
You really hit the nail on the head!
Dammit.
I’d better deposit Kim Yang’s paycheck into her account quickly.
She’s got a loose tongue because she hasn’t been paid.
“But one thing, not wrong.”
“Not wrong?
What is?”
“Meracle, always takes client who come.”
Kim Yang slowly stepped back.
She bowed her waist at a 90-degree angle.
“This is Meracle.
In countless worlds, we will find your miracle.”
“…B-but.
You just told me to get out.
Called me an old woman.”
“That, Boss’s strategy.
To get much money.”
“Whaat?!”
Ah, seriously.
It’s all ruined because of Kim Yang.
“Boss’s me-method.
Fi-fifteen people so far ha-have been like that.”
Because of Kim Yang’s slurred speech, I often mistake her for an idiot.
But Kim Yang isn’t intellectually challenged.
She’s just awkward with the language of the 3rd Floor, Earth.
“Hah!
This is truly absurd.”
Lenea shot to her feet.
“Deceiving a client?
So you were just a Swindler?
Right, the moment I saw your face, I had a bad feeling.”
“Spoken like a true 1,900-year-old, bringing up face-reading now.” [2]
“Hmph!
We’ll see if I ever come back!”
Thud!
The door slammed shut irritably.
Kim Yang slowly closed her eyes.
“Hey, Kim Yang, thanks to you, a client just left.”
I was going to coax her and squeeze some money out, but thanks to you, it’s ruined.
“Bo-Boss.”
“Yeah?”
“I, not get paid.”
“…”
“I, not employee.”
“…”
“Give me money.
You, you, son of a bitch.”
*
The 3rd Floor where we live, Earth.
The Tower is divided into a total of six floors.
It might be possible to go higher, but for now, only up to the 6th Floor is open.
The 1st and 2nd Floors are exceptions we can skip.
The 4th Floor is a medieval fantasy world inhabited by humans, Elves, Orcs, and Dwarves, the [Rajesta Continent].
The 5th Floor is where Martial Artists, Taoist Immortals, and creatures like Dragons and Mythical Beasts live, [Old Murim].
The 6th Floor is where bodies are transplanted into machines or technology is developed to a wondrous degree, [Cyber City].
These four floors each absorbed the strengths and weaknesses of the others, maintaining their own kind of symbiotic relationship.
For reference, Kim Yang is from the 5th Floor.
Slurp.
Because I paid Kim Yang’s salary, my meals from last night’s dinner to today’s lunch have been cup ramen.
Just as the Elf Queen said yesterday, the office was shabby.
I’d grandly named it Meracle, but at best, it was divided into two rooms: a consultation room and an office.
My desk was organized with client lists and data, and an ashtray sat beside it.
I used to smoke here, but clients didn’t like it, so it’s now an unused item.
The ashtray outside is piled high with cigarette butts because it’s a pain to empty.
“Bo-Boss.”
Kim Yang, who only has a chair without a desk, calls me while on her phone again today.
For reference, Kim Yang is an SNS Influencer.
Being from the 5th Floor and having a pretty face, she gains followers rapidly just by posting about her daily life.
“What.”
“She’s here, client.”
The door opened as soon as Kim Yang finished speaking.
And.
There stood the 1,900-year-old Elf Queen, on the verge of tears.
“N-no one-.”
“…”
“No one will take me.”
“…”
“They told a 1,900-year-old like me to just grow vegetables under a tree.”
Of course.
Why would famous places in this industry like ‘Taphon’ or ‘Wedding Company’ accept a 1,900-year-old?
Elves were evaluated with particular coldness in this market.
“Meracle…
you said you take everyone, right?
That you never turn away a client who comes to you?”
Please, just say yes.
I placed a hand on the shoulder of Lenea, who was pleading with her entire body.
“We find your miracle.
Welcome to Meracle.”
“Ah, ahh-!”
Moved, she grabbed my hand and poured out her words like a lament.
“I want…
to get married.”
“Of course, you should.
You’ve lived carrying so many burdens as an Elf Queen.
Shouldn’t you at least live for yourself in your later years?”
“Sob, is it possible with a younger man?
If possible, a Cha Eun-woo look-alike.”
“…Let’s start with the consultation first.”
“It’d be nice if he had a lot of money too.”
“I said let’s start with the consultation!
Before I get the urge to kick you out!”
*
Back in the consultation room.
Consultations are always conducted via face-to-face interviews.
I can communicate with those from the 4th Floor, but I can’t read their writing.
“Name, Lenea.
Race, Elf.
Age, 1,901.
No house, one bow for assets, both parents deceased.
No house, 1,901 years old, and a special note…
former Elf Queen?”
“You just said my age twice.
It hurts, so please be careful.”
“Yes, well.
You know we proceed with a Ranking System, right?”
“Mm, it’s scoring me as a person overall, I see.
It’s not particularly pleasant, but I am confident.”
“In the Ranking System, F-Rank is the lowest and S-Rank is the highest.
We average the subdivided ranks to determine the Overall Rank.
Then you get a Matching with people of a suitable rank.”
For example, a B-rank would generally only meet people around A~C-rank.
“Mm!
I’m counting on you!”
“First, Appearance, S-Rank.
Assets-”
“This bow is really expensive!
Elves go crazy wanting this!”
“…Well, alright.
Assets, A-Rank.”
“Ooh!”
In reality, there are often cases where weapons or armor excavated from the 4th Floor are worth the price of an apartment.
And if an Elf Queen owns it, its value is practically guaranteed.
“No worries about your parents’ retirement.
Profession, unemployed.
Education?”
“Uh, I was taught by my parents.”
“Homeschooling.”
Profession and education.
Both E-Rank.
“And this is the most important part.”
“Mm!
Ask me anything.”
“Can you bear children?”
“…?”
Lenea responded with a dumbfounded expression.
But I was serious.
“I mean, who’s going to take you if you can’t even have kids.
I don’t know when menopause hits for Elves-”
Lenea stood up and immediately aimed her bow.
A Halo of Light radiated out, forming the shape of an Arrow.
“H-h-h-how dare you-!
How dare you ask such a thing of someone!”
“What?!
This is really important!”
“Y-yo-!
You-u-u!
I can bear them!
Elves don’t have menopause!”
Oh, really?
That’s a bit surprising.
After that, I asked a few more things.
Hobbies, smoking and drinking habits, health condition, dating history, etc.
“Now, taking everything into consideration.”
“Mhm!”
“You’re an F-Rank.”
“…”
Lenea’s highly expectant expression gradually fell.
“W-wait, why?
I’m pretty.”
“You’re 1,900 years old.”
“This bow-!
The bow is really rare, too.”
“You’re 1,900 years old.”
“A good wife and wise mother!
I’m wise and confident I’ll only have eyes for my husband.” [3]
“You’re 1,900 years old.”
“…I’m an Old Maid.
I’ve never even dated.”
“So you’re a 1,900-year-old with no dating experience.”
“Should I kill you?”
The Arrow from the Halo of Light was about to appear again, so I hurriedly added.
“But-!
For someone just like you, I’ve found the perfect person!”
“Oh?”
“From the same 4th Floor!
A Prince, no less!
Plus he’s handsome!
And loaded with cash!”
“Ooh?!”
When I showed her the photo tucked in the file, Lenea’s eyes went wide.
It was a chic-looking, white-haired handsome man.
“Not bad?!
Can I really meet this man?”
“Yes!
Of course!
This is Prince Valentino of the Belden Kingdom!
It was very difficult for us to land a contract with him.”
“Ooh!
As expected of Meracle!
Truly the best!”
“Of course, there is one very minor problem.”
“If it’s minor, it’s fine!
I can finally date a handsome man-!”
“You’ll be, approximately, his 127th Wife.”
“Hey, you fucking bastard.”