Flying on the airplane, I watched the white clouds pass by. My constant companions outside of my criminal activities, my gray headphones, rested on my ears. But my thoughts only briefly touched on the song that was playing.
[Music Lyrics:
*I feel like I'm almost there,*
*But I'm not a pile of bones drifting in the silent wind.*
*I can't go back, remaining in complete ignorance,*
*To this interrupted but unceasing voice.*]
I had done it. I killed my father. No, Kaneki Scott. He had stopped being my father the moment he left us. A slight bewilderment was what you could say about my state after the last drops of life force had entered my body. He was a professional hero with years of experience fighting villains and criminals.
[Music Lyrics:
*You make me go,*
*You make me drown.*
*I have nothing left to lose.*
*You make me go,*
*You make me drown.*
*No, I don't want this!*
*I don't want this!*
*I don't want this!*
*But I know there's no one there.*
*I'm just walking along the precipice…*]
And he died at the hands of a thirteen year old brat. It was almost funny. He could have run away. He could have called other heroes to capture me. In that case, I would have had to hide or actually take his wife and daughter hostage, or come up with another plan.
[Music Lyrics:
*I feel like I'm living in your shadow.*
*Sadness has settled into my shallow wound.*
*I can't throw away my rusty knife.*
*It seems that you, unknown to anyone, were always there.*]
But the plan to play on his pride had worked. He had no doubt that he would beat me. To him, it probably looked like a professional boxer who had won several tournaments stepping into the ring against an amateur who had only ever hit a punching bag at home. If I had used "Rejection" at the beginning of the fight, he might have gotten serious and even run away when he started losing.
[Music Lyrics:
*I will hold you tight…*
*Taking this breath, I will swim away.*]
And there was the result. After several weeks in the United States, I was flying back to Japan with a confused feeling about what had happened. I wanted to laugh and cry. Sadness and satisfaction swirled in my mind in a constant rotation. Several years of preparation and searching had partially paid off. The organization behind the laboratory remained. And Giran should help with that.
[Music Lyrics:
*I know there's no one there.*
*I will stay, I will stay.*
*I know there's no one there.*
*I know there's no one there.*
*I know there's no one there!*]
And I needed to figure out how to get that information from him. Torture and interrogation were an extreme method and an unreliable one at that, since he could simply lie. That left only bargaining. He would name his price: money, completing a task, or stealing something. All the other informants I knew just shrugged when I asked about that organization. But I needed to ask around again. Maybe one of them had learned something new.
[Music Lyrics:
*Don't let me go (Don't let me go)*
*You make me drown (Don't let me go)*
*I will move forward, toward shaky answers.*] (milet — Drown)
And when I found out what this organization was and where its research complexes were located, I would take my revenge. For the fear and terror that still lived inside me, for the pain and despair that had become my constant companions. It was just that before, they had tormented my soul, but now they enveloped my enemies and victims. That moment would be my triumph, the result of my efforts and training. I just needed to prepare better, learn their strengths and weaknesses. And when they least expected it, I would destroy their plans, instill despair in them, and let them experience pain.
An ethereal wisp of dark purple smoke swirled unnoticed around the dark haired teenager's hand, his red eyes like burning coals fixed on the airplane window.
[Music Lyrics:
*I know there's no one there.*
*I will stay right here.*
*I'm just walking along the precipice…*]
*
*
*
Returning to Japan was uneventful. Of course, no one was waiting for me at the airport. I didn't tell Izuku about my return, and besides, he had school. Expecting Giran to be joyfully waiting for me was stupid. If that had actually happened, I would have been firmly convinced of one thing: I had finally lost my mind completely, and madness had swallowed me whole. So without any delay, I took a high speed train to Musutafu, and from there went to my rented apartment and collapsed onto my bed.
I started scrolling through social media and the news. Not finding anything interesting, I stared at the ceiling.
"Test subject number twenty three, do you feel any discomfort, weakness, or strange reactions in your body?"
My body was strapped to a metal operating table with belts. The familiar feeling of Dark Matter slowly flowing through my body was gone. My eyes widened.
"Where am I? I can't be a test subject. I escaped from there. This can't be happening."
My head was immobilized, so I couldn't see who was speaking.
"Number twenty three, have you forgotten how to address me? Don't worry, I'll be happy to remind you. After punishment. You've been a bad boy."
The face of Kaneki Scott leaned over me with a wide smile. Through his eyes, an abyss stared back at me.
"You refused to come back to me. So Daddy needs to teach you a lesson. Now, number twenty three, answer the first question. I'll repeat it. Do you feel any discomfort, weakness, or strange reactions in your body?"
"No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No."
"Excellent, so you don't feel anything. I think the new drug can be tested today. Number twenty three, prepare yourself. It's going to hurt a little."
"NOOOOO!"
I woke up screaming and crying. The air crackled around me, and dark purple lightning flashed through the room. My sweaty hands were clutching the bedsheet. I was breathing like a hunted animal. It was just a nightmare. It was just a nightmare. It was just a nightmare. It was just a nightmare. It was just a nightmare. It was just a nightmare.
A few minutes of self reassurance helped a little. It was night outside, and the night city was living its own life. I put on my training clothes and left the apartment. I headed toward an abandoned warehouse where I often trained. I moved in leaps across the rooftops. Streets and the lights of illuminated apartment windows flashed by, but I didn't care about the view.
Soon I arrived at the old, abandoned building. Inside there were only rotten crates and various pieces of scrap metal. I did a warm up routine, preparing myself for a long training session. During all the exercises, I made myself permeable in such a way that it didn't make the training easier. Then I held "Rejection" over my entire body for as long as I could. After that, I punched the warehouse walls, trying to keep the Dark Matter I released under control.
The accumulating fatigue drowned out the emotions from the nightmare. My thoughts began to flow smoothly again in my mind. I continued training until my body gave out completely. I didn't care. My Dark Matter enhances all of my physical characteristics, including recovery.
Tired, I walked home through the alleys. From ahead, I heard the voice of some drunkard.
"Hey, kid, what do you hic think you're…"
* * *
The man, dressed like an ordinary office worker, stopped talking when he felt a tremor run through his whole body. The teenager walked past him, brushing him with his red eyes. The man would have sworn he saw a dark aura surrounding him.
* * *
He was not my victim and not my enemy. I needed to get better control over my emotions and intentions. Failing to restrain them was a weakness. I could not afford to be weak.