“The training method I'm going to teach you is called Essence Unification,” Mum said, settling on the mat before me. “But before that, you must know that this process is extremely strenuous for unawakened individuals. And it remains difficult even after awakening for many. Before I begin my explanation, can you tell me the difference between you and an awakened?”
“Other than me not having an essence seed?” I said. “Awakened have a gift. Well, I have one too, but they can utilise theirs at will.”
“Anything more?”
“Hmm.” I thought hard. “Oh, awakened are not restricted from gaining the Way of Pain Tolerance and other self-harming ways.”
Mum nodded. “You are aware of the basics. Now, I'm going to tell you something that is not discussed enough.”
Easily, I became eager. Anything involving awakened could excite me.
“You see, essence does not exactly work as fuel for magic, or rather, it does not work on its own. You have to draw it to work, and to do that, you need Will.”
Are we thinking about the same will?
Or was she talking about something mystical, like an attribute, perhaps? I didn't even have to ask the question—she was already explaining it.
“Will is involved with a person’s aura, psyche, and many other things, but most of all, only the awakened have a substantial enough Will to draw essence at their liberty.”
Does that mean I am doomed to fail at learning Essence Unification?
No, if that were the case, Mum wouldn't have even considered teaching me.
“A Shaper tends to have more of this Will,” she continued, “making it possible for them to draw essence out of their body, even for a newly awakened Shaper. Anyhow, this Will works like stamina. Exert too much at once, and you’d be out of it for a while. Even with all the essence in your core, you won’t have a way to use it.
“Now, you might be wondering what all that has to do with an unawakened individual if they don't even have a substantial Will to begin with. The thing is, Pumpkin, you too have Will, albeit in a very embryonic form.”
“So that means I can perform Essence Unification?”
Mum nodded. “But there are a few caveats to that,” she said. “Your nascent Will is more rigid. Exercising it is good practice for your future, but overexerting it too much may do more harm than good. Meditation is arguably the best way to recover exhausted Will, but even it cannot restore Will at the rate you’ll exhaust yourself.”
She paused, peering at me with a thoughtful look. “As you are now, a little over an hour of Essence Unification should be your limit. Do that for three or four seasons, and you'll be fully prepared for Essence Weaving.”
“Weaving?” I asked, curious.
“You see,” Mum said, “although ambient essence remains mostly in ethereal vapour form, an awakened can only utilise it through threads of such essence, stitched together in a particular weave. The higher one’s mastery, the more complex the weave becomes. But we won’t be covering much of that tonight—or, in fact, before you awaken.”
After lunch, Mum sent me off to play, informing me my first lesson would begin in the evening. Needless to say, I was excited enough to cut short my playtime and return an hour before sunset. Of course, she didn’t start until she had finished all her tasks. I was certain she took some pleasure in watching me fidget with anticipation.
The masses believed that before an essence seed was formed, drawing essence was an impossible task. Like most beliefs involving the primal force of the universe, this one didn’t tell the whole truth. It was impossible to draw essence from outside one’s body, but one could still gain mastery over the faint, dormant essence that lay within.
“Most do not bother,” Mum said. “For them, the trouble does not outweigh the rewards they gain. But the practice of Essence Unification remains vital even after awakening...
“You are a couple of seasons too young to learn this, but since you are fairly accomplished with meditation, perhaps it won't be a disappointment.”
She had warned me several times about the likelihood of failure—said the process was too difficult for unawakened children to grasp and costed a great deal of time to even find a semblance of success.
“Can we begin now?” I made my intentions clear with the question.
“We can, but first, you need to promise Mum a couple of things.”
“I agree,” I said.
A smile tugged at her lips. “I never thought I’d say this, but there is a time to hurry and a time to be patient,” she said. “If it involves the primal force of the universe, patience is usually the optimal choice.”
“But I know what you’ll ask of me,” I whined.
She tilted her head questioningly. “And what might that be?”
“You won’t want me to do this practice without watching over me, and…” I racked my brain to come up with what else was there. “And I’m not allowed to complain if I fail or if the practice is too difficult?”
“Well, you got one right,” she said. “Under no circumstances are you allowed to practise this without my supervision until I say so.”
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“I promise,” I said loudly.
“Secondly, you are not to teach this to anyone.”
“Why?” I frowned. “Is it a secret like my gift?”
“It is dangerous to meddle with power beyond your comprehension,” Mum said conspiratorially. “I’ll be there to make sure you do not cause any undue damage during your practice, but who will be there for them?”
I frowned, finally understanding. After I swore to follow her demands, she finally began instructing:
“I’m going to show you the way to it,” she said. “Close your eyes, give me your palm, and feel the threads of essence I pour into you. It will be uncomfortable at first, and then painful. You may give up whenever you want.”
“I will not give up.” I clenched my fists.
“It’s not a matter of resolve. The key for you to understand, Pumpkin, is that Essence Unification requires seasons—days of steady accumulation rather than a single gruelling session.”
I shut my eyelids. No way was I giving up without even trying. She took my palm in hers, and soon the familiar warmth of her essence threads seeped into my skin. Mum didn’t weave them to cast the rejuvenation spell I was so familiar with, nor did she relinquish her control over the threads. Instead, she kept pouring a sizeable amount of essence, threading it through my body.
Goosebumps crawled up my skin as a prickly sensation rippled through me. I fought to keep my eyes closed, my focus intact.
“Visualise,” she instructed. “Visualisation is the secret to all essence-related arts.”
I was visualising before she even asked me. My only advanced attribute helped, as did my experience with the Way of Essence Sense. I could practically see the essence; with my bare eyes if it was outside, and in my mind’s eye if it was inward. The latter provided more minute details, though it also required my utmost concentration.
“Can you feel my essence moving into your own?” she asked, though she didn’t expect an answer. “Visualise your essence, just like mine, and try moving it along.”
This was where the challenge began. I clenched my jaw and had to force my essence to listen to my command.
“Easy,” Mum said. “Try not to fight it. A nascent Will is weak, and your body doesn’t yet know the way, but it is possible to draw essence within without making it feel like a battle every time. Coax it by visualising it moving through the pathways.”
It was easier said than done. Essence moved naturally within its channels all the time, but controlling it with my mind was an entirely different feat.
“Do not rush… mastery takes years, not moments.” She clasped my palm, easing me. “Focus. Take only as much essence as you can handle and circulate it the way I’m showing you. The pace is of no concern.”
I listened, because otherwise, it felt impossible.
“Now comes the painful part,” Mum warned. “Lead the essence to your centre—to your abdomen—and imagine a circle.”
I coaxed my colourless transparent essence to follow the path after her bright golden threads. Sweat formed on my body as a pricking pain assaulted my abdomen, where my essence was accumulating. My form quivered, my back shook, as though my gut was being twisted from the inside. A groan escaped through my clenched teeth, and Mum’s grip tightened.
She asked if I wanted to continue. I replied by pressing on.
“Imagine a circle of essence, ever swirling and condensing with each moment towards a spherical form,” her voice echoed in my mind. “Only draw more essence when you’re fully in control.”
The pain persisted the longer I drew the essence. She had warned me my body would need time to adjust to the new flow, and only then would the twisted pain cease. No wonder she had been reluctant to teach me.
By the third circulation, Mum stopped handholding my essence, though I could sense she kept a few threads leashed on my essence in case I encountered a problem.
I did not.
By the fourth round, I drew more threads of essence into the fray. By the seventh round, the flow had doubled. At first, it took me about a quarter of an hour for a full circulation, but the time only shrank the more familiar I became with the whole process.
Unlike meditation, however, this process was not peaceful. By the ninth round, exhaustion weighed on me, my Will fraying. I had to slow my pace and finally stop inducting more essence into the centre by the twelfth round.
The familiar feeling that remained, other than the dull twisted sensation, was the warmth of my mother’s palm as I fell fully into the process.
[A new Way is available: Essence Unification I (1/10)]
At last, the familiar voice of the spell rang in my mind, announcing the fruit of my labour. A satisfied smile touched my lips as I gave in to the exhaustion.
***
Ashlyn
Ashlyn supported her son as he fell asleep on her lap, a content smile resting on his lips. With a quick examination, she found nothing amiss inside his body and withdrew her threads of essence.
Unable to hold back any longer, Jinn finally crept into the room. Their eyes met for the briefest moment before he turned his attention to Arilyn. A sigh escaped him, the tension dropping from his shoulders. He settled beside her and opened his lips.
“For all your protests against helping him form an essence seed, you so easily taught him the process to form it on his own.”
“I didn’t…” Ashlyn glowered at him, but her shoulders didn’t straighten, knowing there was some truth in his words. “It’s merely the elementary method of Essence Unification. To form a seed, he will need to advance beyond that.”
That would take at least a year and a couple of seasons, she thought. By then, he’d be at the accepted age for awakening. Of course, she would be delighted if he ultimately formed his essence seed without the help of the ritual, but her heart couldn’t help but worry—worry about how agonising the next few weeks would be for him.
“I don’t know,” Jinn mused, a rare smile playing on his lips. “Our son seems intelligent and diligent enough to figure all that out.”
Ashlyn bit her lip. “Perhaps I shouldn’t have shown him the way, but I feared he’d try to figure it out on his own and fall into disaster.”
Her gaze returned to her boy. At ten seasons old, he had grown so much—so much that she missed the days she could cradle him in her arms without him protesting. She nuzzled his wild mane of unruly red hair. Finding his face pale, his Will dwindled, she sent a twirl of rejuvenating light into his chest.
“Your worry is unfounded,” said the father, placing his palm over hers. “He doesn't even have a secured Aether root yet, and the amount of essence in his body is too low to harm him in any way. As long as we watch over him, he’ll be fine.”
“I know,” she whispered. But a mother’s heart never stopped worrying. “Sometimes, I feel so resentful of his gift for taking away his chance of having a normal childhood.”
Jinn’s countenance betrayed an expression that said he didn’t feel the same way. But he was clever enough to keep his opinion to himself.
“Look on the bright side, if he succeeds at creating an essence seed, he will receive an Honour.”
A frown crawled onto her brow. Ashlyn hadn’t thought of it that way when she decided to teach him. Creating an essence seed on one’s own was not an impossible task, though it demanded perseverance and raw talent.
“Honestly, I thought it would take him days to get the hang of it,” he said. “I was double his age when I formed anything that resembled an essence seed. He looks like he merely needs a couple more seasons and more essence to succeed.”
“I keep forgetting he can see essence,” she mumbled.
“He can?” It was news to Jinn.
“Didn’t I tell you?” asked Ashlyn. Finding him shaking his head, she returned, “Perhaps you would have known if you had been here with us.”
The mood soured instantly, and all he managed was to look ashamed.
“Ash, you know I was—”
“I know,” she said, standing to her feet with Arilyn in her arms. “Doesn’t make it easy.”