Ever since the “Physics-based Fire Style” incident, Senju Naoki’s status at the Ninja Academy had become exceptionally unique.
On one hand, he became a “monster” that all the students kept at a respectful distance.
No one dared to make loud noises in front of him; they even took detours around his seat, fearing they might accidentally provoke this lord and be blasted into dust by some “physical phenomenon.”
On the other hand, he had become a “god” in the hearts of some people.
The “Naoki-boss Fan Club,” led by Jiraiya, was quietly established.
It didn’t have many members—actually, he was a commander without an army.
However, Jiraiya’s propaganda skills were top-notch.
Every day at school, he would brag about how unfathomable Boss Naoki was, claiming that the Fire Style that day was just the tip of the iceberg and that the boss’s true strength was enough to destroy the world, and so on.
Meanwhile, Orochimaru had completely transformed into a stalker-cum-researcher.
He would appear around Naoki on time every day, using his golden slit pupils to record Naoki’s every move.
“Naoki-kun yawned three times today, at an average interval of one hour and fifteen minutes.
This proves his mental energy consumption is high, likely related to maintaining the massive Chakra within his body.”
“Naoki-kun ate Tri-color Dango for lunch and chewed 32 times, indicating his digestive system is very healthy and capable of efficiently absorbing energy.”
“When Naoki-kun sleeps in class, his breathing is steady and his heart rate stays at 60 beats per minute.
This is a high-efficiency meditative state; he is using sleep to recover and refine Chakra!
How scientific!”
…Such records filled the small notebook he carried with him.
To this, Naoki just wanted to say: I didn’t, I’m not, don’t talk nonsense!
I yawn because I’m sleepy, I eat dango because I’m hungry, and sleeping is just plain sleeping!
It has absolutely nothing to do with cultivation!
But no one believed him.
Under the “Over-interpretation” filter of the entire school’s teachers and students, any of Naoki’s salted fish behaviors were interpreted as profound cultivation.
Him sleeping on the desk was “sinking into the spiritual world to perceive the origin of the Ninja Way.”
Him staring out the window was “insight into the laws of nature, seeking the ultimate truths of heaven and earth.”
Even him eating potato chips in class could be analyzed by Orochimaru as the conclusion of “balancing Yin and Yang Chakra in the body by supplementing specific trace elements.”
Naoki completely gave up struggling.
Think whatever you want, as long as you don’t bother me.
Thus, he contentedly lived the salted fish life of his dreams.
Every day at school, amidst the “do as you please” looks from the teachers and the “after you, Great One” awe of his classmates, he would find a window seat to sleep and space out.
Occasionally, he’d get his ears pulled and be lectured by Tsunade, then watch Jiraiya get pummeled by her, and just like that, the day would pass.
After school, he had Jiraiya as his number one lackey to wait on him hand and foot, and people even scrambled to help him write his homework (though he never turned it in).
It was simply too wonderful.
If it weren’t for that wretched system popping up every now and then to assert its presence, Naoki felt he could live this way until the end of time.
This afternoon was a theory class at the Ninja Academy.
On the podium, a Chunin teacher was explaining “Nature Transformation and Shape Transformation of Chakra” with spit flying everywhere.
The content was dull and tedious, making Naoki drowsy.
He yawned, his eyelids beginning to fight as he prepared for a friendly meeting with the God of Dreams.
[Ding!]
That cold, familiar mechanical voice rang out again at an inopportune time.
[Detected host performing salted fish behavior: Sleeping in class.]
[Judgment in progress…]
[Remaining silent while the masses are clamorous, seeking inner peace in the hall of knowledge—this is disdain for the mundane, the ultimate height of solitude and arrogance!]
[Compatibility 95%!]
[Salted fish behavior has triggered a random mission!]
Naoki’s heart skipped a beat.
Again?
His scalp went numb whenever he heard the words “random mission” now.
The last random mission was to blow up the school, which almost sent him to the afterlife on the spot.
What did it want this time?
[Random Mission Issued: Inspecting the Territory.]
[Mission Description: As a man who has inherited the soul of the Uchiha (self-proclaimed by the system), how can you not patrol your own territory?
Naka Shrine, as the symbol of the Uchiha Clan’s power and glory, awaits the return of its master.]
[Mission Objective: Within this day, please head to the Uchiha Clan’s Naka Shrine and complete a check-in before the secret stone tablet passed down through generations of the Uchiha Clan.]
[Mission Reward: “Three-Tomoe Sharingan (Passive effect: Enhanced dynamic vision, can be permanently hidden)”.]
[Failure Penalty: Wear a women’s kimono in the Konoha Village central square and dance the complete “Gokuraku Jodo,” with a live broadcast to the entire village provided by the system.]
Looking at the mission panel, Naoki almost spat out a mouthful of blood.
Naka Shrine?!
Check-in in front of the Uchiha stone tablet?!
System, have you gone mad?!
What kind of place was that?
That was the Uchiha Clan’s forbidden ground!
Forget a Senju like him, even ordinary Uchiha Clan members couldn’t approach without permission!
And what era was this?
This was the era when the Second Hokage, Senju Tobirama, was in power!
He, the biological grandson of Senju Tobirama, was supposed to stroll into the forbidden ground of the Uchiha Clan, who hated the Senju the most?
What was the difference between this and a Jew running into the Nazi SS headquarters and shouting “Heil Hitler”?!
This was dancing in a minefield?
No, this was fucking dancing the tango in a minefield while holding a nuclear bomb!
“System, I protest!
This mission is too dangerous; it’s impossible to complete!” Naoki roared frantically in his mind.
[Protest denied.]
“I refuse to do it!
At most, I’ll just dance!
It’s not like I haven’t faced social death once or twice already!” Naoki decided to be firm for once.
[Detected host attempting to defy the mission.]
[Initiating penalty preview…]
The next second, an extremely high-definition and realistic scene appeared in Naoki’s mind.
In the scene, “he” was wearing a pink, lace-trimmed ornate kimono with exquisite makeup, performing those butterfly dance steps he was all too familiar with from his previous life in the busiest central square of Konoha Village, accompanied by demonic music.
The crowd was packed layers deep around him. This chapter is updated first at g.com.
His grand-uncle Senju Tobirama stood at the very front, his face ashen, a Water Severing Wave already forming in his hand.
His grand-aunt Uzumaki Mito was laughing so hard she was shaking, even pulling out a Camera to record the event.
Tsunade covered her face with an “I don’t know him” expression.
Jiraiya and a bunch of kids were whistling and jeering on the side.
Orochimaru was nearby, giving a live commentary in his signature raspy voice: “Oh~ the angle of that waist twist is 32.5 degrees, perfectly showcasing the flexibility of human muscles…”
And up in the sky, a giant screen made of Chakra was broadcasting this scene in real-time to every corner of Konoha…
“Stop!
Stop!
Stop!”
Naoki felt like he was about to suffocate.
He would rather be sliced in half by his grand-uncle’s Water Severing Wave than let this happen!
“I’ll take it!
I’ll take it, okay?!” he shouted in his mind, feeling humiliated.
[Mission accepted.
Wishing the host good fortune in battle.]
The system’s voice disappeared.
Naoki slumped on the desk, having lost all will to live.
He glanced out the window toward the Uchiha Clan Compound, as if he could see hell beckoning to him.
How was he supposed to slip out of school, sneak into the heavily guarded Uchiha Clan Compound, find the legendary Naka Shrine, and finally check in before that even more legendary stone tablet without alerting anyone?
This mission difficulty was simply hell-tier!
How could an eight-year-old, weak (in his own mind) little salted fish like him possibly complete it!
Wait…
Weak?
Naoki suddenly remembered the reward he had just obtained—[Uchiha Fluid Taijutsu Basics].
In that set of Taijutsu, there seemed to be…
just the right techniques for stealth and concealing one’s presence?
With a thought, the information regarding the Uchiha Fluidity Art resurfaced in his mind.
Indeed!
It contained not only efficient killing techniques but also a complete set of methods for stealth, tracking, counter-tracking, and breath concealment.
It was practically tailor-made for assassination and infiltration!
Could it be…
the system issued this mission just to make me practice the new skills I learned?
Naoki felt like he had grasped something.
Perhaps…
this mission wasn’t as hard as he thought?
He glanced at the teacher still talking incessantly on the podium, then at his drowsy classmates.
A plan quietly formed in his mind.