[Deathwish Count]: Getting every married woman in the shinobi world pregnant might be a slight exaggeration.
[Doujin Artist]: Not really.
This guy has way too much stamina.
[Riku-sama] [Group Owner]: Speaking from experience?
[Doujin Artist]: You’re the one who claimed you could “take off” seventy-two times in one night.
[Deathwish Count]: Seventy-two times…
Alucard drew a slow breath, his expression showing something dangerously close to reverence.
[Riku-sama] [Group Owner]: You believed that just because I said it?
I also told you my junk was bigger than your head.
You believe that too?
[Doujin Artist]: Hard to say.
For all I know, you’ve been modified into some kind of laboratory freak.
[Riku-sama] [Group Owner]: What the hell do you mean, laboratory freak?!
You’re seriously impossible!
Riku’s mouth twitched as he pushed open the door to his office.
As mentioned before, he worked as an instructor at the Academy.
His main subjects were Civics and Conduct and Tactical Deployment.
In simpler terms, he taught classroom subjects rather than combat training, which placed him fairly close to the bottom of the Academy’s internal pecking order.
Still, Riku was an Uchiha and handsome enough to stand out wherever he went, so unlike most instructors who taught academic subjects, he was anything but anonymous among the students.
The love letters scattered beneath his office door were proof enough.
Sometimes Riku really had to admire how early children in the shinobi world matured.
Click.
The moment the door closed behind him, Uzumaki Kushina emerged from his body.
She casually bent down, picked up a pink envelope from the floor, and began reading it.
“Inuzuka Hana?” Kushina glanced at the name.
“Isn’t this girl around Itachi’s age?”
“Yeah.
They’re classmates.”
Riku answered absentmindedly while sorting through some manuscripts at his desk.
A few seconds later, however, he sensed that the atmosphere had changed.
He looked up.
Kushina was staring at him as though she had just discovered he was human garbage.
“Big Sis?
What’s wrong?”
“What do you think?”
“You can’t blame me because someone gave me a love letter!
That was entirely her decision.” Riku immediately defended himself.
“Besides, there’s no way I’d be interested in a little girl like that.
That would be disgusting.”
“Oh?” Kushina raised an eyebrow.
“Then who are you interested in?”
“My gorgeous Big Sis, obviously.”
The answer came without the slightest hesitation.
Six months ago, Riku might have stumbled over those words.
Now they rolled off his tongue with suspicious ease.
“Hmph.
You certainly know what to say.”
Kushina naturally settled onto his lap and wrapped both arms around his neck.
“Maybe one day you’ll get tired of me and go looking for someone younger and prettier.”
“Never happening.”
Riku slid a hand around her waist, his voice firm.
“Honestly, I wouldn’t even mind if you did find someone else.” Kushina sighed softly.
“A woman like me, who’s already had a child, was never expecting to keep you all to herself.
But there are still lines you absolutely cannot cross, understand?”
“Relax.
I really don’t—”
Knock!
Knock!
Knock!
A rapid series of knocks interrupted him.
Whoosh.
Kushina instantly dissolved into blood mist and flowed back into Riku’s body with the ease of long practice.
Riku straightened his clothes and calmly called, “Come in.”
Creak.
The door opened, revealing Sarutobi Hiruzen dressed in ordinary clothes.
“Lord Hokage?!”
Riku hurried to his feet and bowed as though genuinely caught off guard.
“Sit, sit.
There’s no need to be so formal.” Hiruzen smiled warmly.
“I’m not here on official business.
I simply wanted to have a little chat with you.”
“Yes, Lord Hokage.”
“How have you found your years working for Root?”
“My colleagues have always treated me well, and Lord Danzō is practically family to me,” Riku answered with a perfectly sincere expression.
“I see.”
Sarutobi Hiruzen took out his pipe, placed it between his lips, and sighed.
“You’re a good child, Riku.
You’ve sacrificed a great deal for the peace and stability of the village.”
Outside the old man’s field of vision, Kushina silently emerged from Riku again and began angrily shaking her fist at the back of Hiruzen’s head.
The sight nearly destroyed Riku’s composure.
He barely suppressed a laugh before answering, “It’s only what I should do.”
“You shouldn’t dismiss your contributions so easily.”
Hiruzen shook his head, a kindly smile spreading across his weathered face.
“That In-Depth Guide to the Will of Fire you compiled is an invaluable resource for all of Konoha.
The village has never been stingy when rewarding those who have rendered such meritorious service.”
“I could only write it thanks to the wisdom and experience that you and Lord Danzō passed down to me,” Riku replied modestly.
The compliment landed perfectly.
Sarutobi Hiruzen’s smile widened until he looked positively delighted.
He personally doubted that Shimura Danzō possessed anything resembling wisdom or useful experience concerning the Will of Fire, but he understood the position Riku was in.
If anything, the young man’s tact only made Hiruzen regard him more favorably.
“I seem to remember that you once wanted to become a medical-nin?”
‘Huh?’
Riku stared at him.
‘How far back are we talking here?
Back then, Riku had already realized he possessed very little natural talent as a conventional shinobi, so he had considered changing direction and studying medical ninjutsu instead.
Obviously, that plan had gone nowhere.
For Hiruzen to deliberately bring it up now, he was clearly trying to create a sense of familiarity between them.
The problem was that Riku no longer needed medical ninjutsu in the slightest.
Strictly speaking, he barely even qualified as a shinobi anymore.
“I’ve already written to an excellent teacher on your behalf,” Hiruzen continued, exhaling a ring of smoke.
“I expect to receive an answer soon.”
“Then I’m very grateful, Lord Hokage.”
What else was Riku supposed to say?
All he could do was accept the favor with appropriate gratitude.
“I’ll let you get back to work.”
Hiruzen rose from his chair and gave him a meaningful smile.
“There’s no need to mention our conversation today to anyone else.”
Especially Danzō.
Riku understood the unspoken message perfectly and nodded.
“Of course, Lord Hokage.”
Click.
Once the door closed behind Hiruzen, Kushina reappeared and turned toward Riku.
“Who do you think he found to teach you?”
“Who do you think?” Riku asked with a smile.
Kushina rested her chin on one hand.
“Tsunade?
No…
that can’t be right.”
“Hard to say.
Depends on what that old man offered her.”
Riku shrugged and turned his attention back to the group chat.
[Riku-sama] [Group Owner]: What the hell?!
Eriri-chan, you started a livestream and didn’t even tell me?
On the livestream, several figures on Eriri’s side had already formed a combat formation.
Opposite them stood an enormous creature resembling a monstrous praying mantis.
That was a Calamity Beast.
Their forms were not limited to insects.
Some resembled ordinary animals twisted into monstrous shapes, while others looked like malformed creatures that barely seemed to belong in the natural world at all.
[Doujin Artist]: Hmph.
Why should I go out of my way to tell you?
It’s not like you’re anyone special to me!
In reality, Eriri had already been preparing to notify him.
She simply refused to admit it.
[Riku-sama] [Group Owner]: Huh?
Yukinoshita Yukino and Gokou Ruri are in your world too?
Wait—holy shit, Kasumigaoka is STACKED!
Those thighs!
Black stockings digging into soft flesh like that?
There’s no saving any man who sees this!
[Doujin Artist]: UCHIHA RIKU, YOU BASTARD!
GO DIE!