Send me forth into the snows of loneliness if you must. I shall shiver in perpetual want of your warmth.
Ellen Seams
Alice held the crystal to her chest while her cheeks flamed beet red. She could swear that she was about to burst in flame from the entire lines she had received from that idiot. “Why is she so sweet and ignores me for so long.”
“ALICE! THREE LOAVES!” Screamed Mistress Tianna.
Sighing she tucked the crystal away in the apron she wore. The flour stains on it showing a lot more mess than she really liked. Clearing her throat and waving at her face until she cooled down just a shy more. Looking flushed from the ovens was alright but blushing like some silly lovestruck teenager would be horrifying. Reaching into the dome of the oven, with all the bread stuck to the ceiling in their rounds. With spatula and basket in hand she shucked three loaves that were being kept warm off the wall and held them aloft. The sweat on her brow just shy of being an embarrassment.
“Coming Tianna!” With three quick swipes she knocked off some flour from the counter. With a deep breath she erupted from the back kitchen into the bakery proper. Her face frozen in a smile as she looked at the man who had been fighting to be her betrothed for the last few weeks.
“Oh, hello Henry.” Hairy palmed bastard. I know you spend all your goddamn coin at a whorehouse. “I’m surprised to see you. I thought you wouldn’t be able to afford a few loaves of bread. Last I saw you were passed out in the street.”
His slimy yellow teeth were wide as he looked at Alice hungrily. “Oh, I’ve had quite the windfall actually. I was going to take this bread and talk to your mother about your future.”
Bile flooded the back of Alice’s mouth at the thought of this filthy man taking her when there was so much better out there. Even stupid, no good, silly, Ellen would be better. She placed the platter of bread hard on the counter so hard it clanged.
“Alice,” Tianna warned as a warm matronly hand settled on Alice’s shoulder. “Henry is a customer so I expect you to be cordial.”
With a gaze that should have been able to kill, she smiled with all the warmth of a frozen winter lake. “Well Henry, I’m sure that if you are good company I cannot fault you for spending time with my mother. But wouldn’t it be wiser to talk to my father?”
Sweat beading on his forehead Henry’s smile faltered for just a moment. Being the daughter of a blacksmith that had a famously bad temper had its benefits. That and his complete blindness that she was sleeping with Ellen some nights mixed with a sense of extreme overprotectiveness. Leaning back and crossing her arms she waited for whatever the slimy man was going to say.
“I’m sure your father is a very busy man. I wouldn’t want to bother him. You know. Don’t want to make it so he misses any work… or something.” It was Henry’s turn to sweat as his eyes darted around as if Alice’s father would burst through the door at any moment.
The uncomfortable silence that filled the air was like a heavy weight on the toad that was chasing the swan. He grabbed the bread, leaving a mark behind to pay for them. “Thank you for your business Henry, do come by whenever you want the softest bread in all the kingdoms.” Tianna had the gall to curtsy to the slimy fuck.
Alice didn’t do anything but stare as Henry retreated from her gaze. Her temper flaring. Maybe Ellen isn’t so bad. Compared to this disgusting filth. Throwing her nose in the air she went to storm away but a matronly hand landed on her shoulder and made her pause. Pausing she turned and looked at the second mother she ever had. The fear she had been tamping down being given a shot of courage to make itself known. Clearing her throat, “Yes, ma’am?”
“Look, I know that he would be a foul choice to be a suitor. But it is not your place to debate wether someone is to be your husband. You must listen to the desires of your parents. If, which I’m not saying it’s going to happen, but if he can meet an appropriate bride price. He’ll be your husband. And if you want to remain unbeaten you may want to make sure he doesn’t feel that you hate him.” Tianna’s eyes were boring into her. Drilling deeply enough to penetrate the tough outer shell.
The tears at the corner of her eyes threatened to fall and she forced herself to shut off all those silly emotions that were supposed to guide her through life. They didn’t know what was good for her. Just because Ellen made them sing glory doesn’t mean that is what she really needed. “It wouldn’t be very fair. That man, he would spend every spare mark on the comforts of another woman. My legs would never part for such a beast willingly. I’d loathe to ever bear him a child.”
Tianna softened and turned the young woman to look into her face and took a deep breath, “It is just our place. Unseen, behind the men that we support. I didn’t really love my dear husband but I supported him with all that I had. That he had left me with a son when he passed is a blessing. And when that boy is done with his schooling I will gladly hand him the store and return to the kitchen. That is only a year away. And when that happens we won’t be able to afford to keep you on.
“You’ll have to learn that sometimes it is better to bend than to break. That in the end it is better to take someone disgusting into your embrace and try to shape them into something better than just trying to accept everything as is. If you do end up with Henry it would be wise to give him everything he wants so that he doesn’t seek the whores. For your own sake. So you do not starve in the winter nights.” Tianna rubbed her arms gently and sighed looking at her apprentice.
“Why not just marry me to your son? What would be so wrong with that? Then, you could retire knowing I could handle the cooking, rest at home, and then I wouldn’t ever have to worry about disgusting filth.” Alice tried to grasp onto hope as the second woman to raise her looked deeply into her eyes.
“I’ve already arranged a bride price for another. Otherwise, I would agree and let you wait the time until he is a man in entirety. But, that isn’t what fate has in mind for all of it.” A floury hand pat her face, leaving an unfortunate print there as Tianna laughed just a little, “Now, why don’t you go ahead and head back into the kitchen. We don’t want the rolls to burn for the lunch rush.”
Nodding Alice took a deep breath, putting on the armor of self control and wiped the flour away from her cheek, “I’m going to have wiped off my makeup by the time I’m done cleaning this. But you’re right. We don’t want to lose all that product.”
Stepping away Alice slipped through the door and into the back as she went back to the oven and started pulling out all the rolls. The fresh scent of bread filled the air as she opened the vents to spread the delightful and alluring aroma for all those that were going to be here for lunch.
Taking out the crystal Alice looked at the door and turned her back so that she wouldn’t be seen writing out what she was about to do.
My Love,
I’m sorry that I’m so cold to you. That I’ve locked away my heart when all I want is for us to be able to run away and marry one another. Like in the far east where I hear that such binds are well accepted and known. Beyond the kingdoms. Won’t you whisk me away? Won’t you run with me. To gather all the money we have and get out of the kingdom and see what is truly out there for us. Instead of being slaved to whatever our parents want?
Please, I love you so dearly. I know I put on a cold front, like the winter storm you think I’ll leave you in. But I will be your warmth. I will lay with you whenever you desire. I will cook you your meals so that you may never grow hungry. I don’t mind that you will wander. I know the times when you smell of another woman’s perfume when you come see me. I know I’m just one of your choices and not the one you will be with and only with. But you are my one. Let me be selfish and pretend that we will be together.
I beg you now. With all I have. Take us away from here. Take us where we can be together even if that costs me my family and all I have made with my life. I’ll serve you, I’ll walk upon my knees at your feet if it means we are together.
With Eternal Love
Alice Seams
She stared at the message. Looking at it and feeling the tears that wanted to be shed with it. That it would be so easy to bare it to her. All she had to do was send it on its way. But slowly, delicately she wrote the arcane symbol to delete all of what she put on there. Reading the message she received once more she sighed.
Wiping at her eyes she straightened her back. Time to get back to work. She grabbed the ingredients and whipped up a batch of batter to get turned into the cakes they would be baking for the night time selling to all the women that wanted a sweet treat.
Her arm grew sore as she beat the last of the batter into the right consistency and then started pouring them into their sheets. It would have to set and level while she stoked the wood stove to be ready to bake the real money maker they kept ready. Now having to wait she grabbed the pulled loaves and walked out into the front of the store and started to fill all the baskets with covered bread to keep them warm and fluffy.
“I’ll have the cakes ready by tonight. What flavors do you want for the fillings and frosting?” She stood up straight and looked imperious and like she was controlling the kingdom that was the bakery.
“I bought some lemons. Make a curd for the stuffing and zest in a proper frosting. And then, go into the cold cellar and grab the white chocolate. A dusting of it along the rim would be perfect.”
Nodding she turned around and went to do the rest of her business for the day. Putting Henry out of her mind. It wasn’t like her mother would just sell her off at a moment’s notice. It would take more than that to sway her father. She would just talk to him, about how unworthy and slimy Henry was. That he was a frequent visitor to the whore houses and had poor hygiene. Surely her father would see how unworthy the worm was and smite him for his insolence.
Then I’ll tell Ellen what I feel.