Today he was undoubtedly happy, extremely happy. But after the initial burst of joy and excitement, he now began to feel somewhat lost and bewildered.
Today he had fallen in love with a man at first sight. He truly felt that everything about this man matched his aesthetic to perfection; he liked every single thing about him. Even stranger, it felt as though he were very familiar with him, as if they had known each other for a long time, and perhaps had even loved him for a long time already. This feeling was somewhat bizarre. He didn’t know why he would suddenly feel this way, nor did he know what to do next.
He was still a patient, a psychiatric patient. He probably wouldn’t like someone like him, right? That must be it. The moment he saw him today, he started throwing punches. Maybe he looked very much like someone he despised.
Ning Anyu felt somewhat melancholy, unconsciously turning the black smart band on his wrist.
This had been custom-made for him at great expense by his father. It could detect an episode a few minutes before it struck and would automatically send an alert to his accompanying caregiver. On top of it was a small button; pressing it would extend a tiny needle to inject a tranquilizer directly into his body.
Only, ordinary tranquilizers didn’t work on him, so this medication was also specially formulated. Once injected, a person would immediately fall into a deep sleep.
This was an emergency measure taken by his parents to enable him to go out normally. Whenever he went out, at least one caregiver would accompany him. In the event of an episode, after he was injected with the medication and fell unconscious, the caregiver would bring him back.
Yet why did he have this strange illness? There had never been a history of mental illness in his family. Furthermore, even when he wasn’t having an episode, he often felt uneasy and anxious, as if some very important matter was waiting for him to finish. That was why he always liked to release his physical energy through fighting, through sweating it out in hand-to-hand combat, to drive away this feeling.
His sleep was always very light, as if a nerve inside him remained constantly taut, trying to keep him awake. He was afraid that if he fell into a deep sleep, he would forget some crucial matter. He didn’t know why it was like this.
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However, ever since meeting that man a moment ago, he felt that the agitation and torment that had long lurked hidden in his heart had vanished. Just like now, he could quietly sit down and slowly ponder his problems. Although his heart held some confusion and bewilderment, deep down, he felt secure and at peace.
That night, Ning Anyu experienced a rare deep sleep, but he sank profoundly into a strange dream.
In a classical, opulent room, a man was frantically rummaging through chests and cabinets.
Gold, silver, pearls, and jade were scattered messily all over the floor.
That man actually looked identical to him, except he was dressed in ancient attire. His clothes were luxurious, resembling the attire of an emperor from some dynasty in a television drama.
Only, at this moment, that man’s expression was panicked as he searched everywhere for some object, muttering incoherently to himself.
Ning Anyu only felt that it was exceedingly bizarre, so he walked up to him and tried to ask, “Hey, who are you? Why do we look so much alike?”
Yet the other person didn’t notice him at all, and suddenly spun around, crashing straight into him.
It was only at the moment of impact that he realized he seemed to be a formless, ethereal shadow. Upon being collided with by that man, they actually merged into one, and his heart instantly absorbed the intense emotions that man was feeling at that moment.
He couldn’t control this body; he could only feel what it felt and act as it acted. At this point, he finally heard clearly the frantic muttering tumbling from the man’s lips.
“I can definitely save you! The forbidden technique controlling me was so powerful yet I managed to uproot it, there’s no reason I can’t save you! There’s no reason.”
“Where did it go? There was clearly one pill left.”
Finally, the man fished out a small box, a flash of surprise lighting up his eyes, tinged even with a hint of madness.
“Found it! I found it! The Fortune-Transferring Pill, I found it! I can finally save you!”
Yet immediately after, tears uncontrollably welled up and rolled down his eyes. Ning Anyu felt the muscles in his own face twitching from excitement and heartache, a trembling voice spilling from his mouth: “Feng Qing, I’m sorry, I don’t want to die either, I can’t bear to leave you.”
“But I have no other choice. A life for a life, this is the only way.”
“Don’t blame me. If there is an afterlife, I will definitely come find you, and I will stay by your side forever, never letting anyone hurt you again!”
Then he tilted his head back and swallowed that medicinal pill.
Ning Anyu jolted awake from the dream, hot tears still rolling down the corners of his eyes.
He sat up, the raw grief in his heart causing him to hug his knees, burying his head between them as he continued to cry, venting the emotions brought over from the dream.
He didn’t know why he had actually experienced complete empathy with the man in the dream.
Although he didn’t understand what on earth had happened to him, he himself felt truly, deeply heartbroken.
Why would he have such a dream? Could that man in the dream be himself? Was it his past life? Then who was the Feng Qing he wanted to save? That feeling, it felt like someone he deeply loved.
Could it really be Chu Xichen from his past life? Otherwise, why would he have that exact feeling the very first time he saw him today? It felt like he had already loved him for a long time, had been separated for ages, and had finally found him.
Although this was mystical, the feeling was so real. He didn’t understand the beginning of it all, had no basis for it, only the feeling.
Yet why did taking that medicine mean trading a life for a life? What kind of medicine was that? Poison? Could dying by taking poison allow him to trade for the other person to live? Ning Anyu found it utterly unbelievable.
Ning Anyu thought about it for a long time without coming to any answers, and finally decided to stop thinking about it altogether. No matter what had happened in a past life, he had found Chu Xichen now anyway, and living his future days well was what mattered most.
The next day, after handing over all his work and finishing the transfer procedures, it was already afternoon. Chu Xichen packed up the belongings from his office that he needed to take with him. Although it wasn’t much, it still filled two large bags.
As he walked down to the lobby on the ground floor, he heard someone calling out from behind. Turning around, he saw Tian Luo hurrying toward him.
“I heard you’re getting transferred. Is that true?” Tian Luo asked, staring at him with a pair of wide, round eyes.
“Mhm. Tomorrow I’m heading to the Municipal Prison Bureau. I don’t know which prison they’ll assign me to.”
Tian Luo was his junior from university. Back in school, Tian Luo had always loved coming to find him, using all sorts of excuses to seek him out. At first, he thought she was just one of those pursuers, but she told him she simply admired him as a top student and looked up to him as a role model.
Chu Xichen had been an academic high achiever from childhood, skipping grades starting in elementary school, and had earned a double master’s degree by the age of thirty-five. Moreover, while at J University, he had also won the championship in the national college students’ free combat tournament. In short, he excelled in both literary and martial arts, and his looks completely crushed everyone else around, making him a cold, ascetic, abstinent male god. Plenty of people liked him, and quite a few confessed their feelings boldly, which sometimes caused him a great deal of trouble.
At first, when Tian Luo tried to strike up a conversation with Chu Xichen, he completely ignored her. But she never took it to heart, and the next time they met, she would cheerfully go over and greet him anyway. Over time, Chu Xichen grew accustomed to it, feeling that she had a good temperament and wasn’t pretentious or affectation-prone. Gradually, he started chatting with her and even had a few meals together.
Therefore, Tian Luo could be considered Chu Xichen’s only relatively close female friend.
Hearing Chu Xichen’s words, Tian Luo’s jaw nearly dropped in shock.
“Why? And the Prison Bureau of all places? Are there a lot of psychiatric patients there that need seeing?”