Inspector Carter stood just inside the little shack's doorway and grumbled, "You said it would be here until nine, that it wouldn't go off hunting until then! Instead the damned thing's killed again, while we were wasting time in the pub listening to your blasted stories!"
Martin hissed, "Turn that bloody light out! It has to be here somewhere, our source doesn't make mistakes like that!"
"Hold up," Colin said as he pushed past the inspector to get a closer look inside the shed. A moment later he added, "I think she's still alive. Martin get in here, looks like we've got a survivor!"
The tall Londoner hurried inside to get a look at the scene, and only then was I finally able to see in through the doorway.
The interior was lit up from Carter's torch, and from what I could see it looked more like a disused storage shed than an old duck-blind. There were some dusty old garden tools here and there, and a few rusted containers of fertilizer and pesticide scattered about. None of that mattered though, as my eyes fell on the victim. Something wasn't quite right about her, but I couldn't put my finger on what it was. Whatever it was left me with a cold weight in my gut though.
Huddled on the floor against the middle of the wall directly opposite the door sat what appeared to be a young woman. She looked no older than eighteen, and had some sort of dark lumpy fabric wrapped around her, so only her head was exposed. She'd nodded forward slightly, as if she'd been staring down at the floor in front of her. Her short brown hair was messy and almost matted against her scalp like it was wet, as if she'd been in the river perhaps. Her eyes were closed, as was her mouth. But I could hear what sounded like a very soft sobbing noise coming from her direction, and every few seconds she seemed to tremble slightly.
Both Carter and Campbell approached the woman, with the inspector on her left and the other man to her right.
The inspector angled his torch down so it wasn't shining directly at her, then carefully reached out to place a hand on her shoulder as he asked, "Miss are you alright? Can you tell me what happened to you?"
In response the head lolled backwards, but the eyes remained closed. And her expression seemed almost frozen, as if it was just painted on her face. Then I felt another shock as it hit me, her face actually looked like it was just painted onto her head. That's when her huddled body began to unravel completely, in a scene that I was positive would be replaying in my nightmares for years to come. What I first took to be some sort of lumpy blanket turned out to be dozens and dozens of long hairy appendages.
What originally looked like a young woman's head was actually the abdomen of some sort of unnaturally huge spider-like monstrosity. Except it clearly wasn't a spider. Beyond the size, it simply had far too many legs. Rather than eight there had to be a few dozen of them. Each was well over a meter long, three to four centimetres thick, and made up of way too many joints and segments.
As the huddled mass unwrapped itself into all those limbs it also revealed the monster's actual head, down where the woman's pelvis would have been if she'd been human. That was just as mind-wrenching, the head was almost as large as its abdomen but I couldn't see anything like a mouth. Instead it just had two huge unblinking soup-bowl-sized eyes, that reflected the torchlight with a soft green glow.
By that point both Carter and Campbell were stumbling backwards to try and get clear of the thing, but the monster's reflexes proved to be much quicker than either of the two men. About four of its legs instantly latched on to the inspector, two had him by either side of his head while another found his throat. The last hooked onto one of his hands, sending the torch flying across the shed and into the far corner. At the same time five more long multi-jointed limbs connected with the Scotsman. One had him across the face over his eyes, two more held firm to either side of his neck, and another pair snagged both his hands.
The men tried to struggle, but that only lasted a split second. Then both of them began screaming in chorus, as their bodies started to contort.
"Oh shit!" Martin gasped in alarm as he stumbled back a few paces.
At the same time I lunged forward to try and pull Carter free of the thing's grasp. It was way stronger than it looked though, and had too many more legs available to keep fighting back.
As I struggled with it I shouted at Smith, "Do something damn it! You're the expert, kill the damned thing!"
That's when I felt one of the monster's legs strike my forehead, while a second affixed itself to the back of my right hand. For just an instant I felt a burning pain deep inside my body, then a moment later it was gone as the monster physically tossed me backwards into the opposite wall.
I ended up between the doorway and Martin, who had his right hand raised as if he was going to point a weapon at it. His hand was empty though, and he didn't appear to be doing anything.
"What the fuck are you waiting for?!" I yelled at him as I tried to shake off the shock of what just happened to me. "Do something!"
"I can't!" he shouted back. "Not while it's got them, or I'll kill them too!"
"For fuck sake!" I cursed.
My eyes swept the inside of the shed in desperation, and immediately fell on a sturdy-looking garden spade. It had a stout wooden handle and the business end appeared to be solid steel. I grabbed that, and in one motion I lunged forward and swung it around with all my might. I deliberately angled the blade so it struck the false face edge-on, and the effect was almost devastating.
The thing's head-sized abdomen burst like a balloon full of rancid jelly, spattering the wall, the inspector, Colin, and most of all, me. The damn thing still wasn't dead yet, but I'd hurt it enough that it released both Carter and Campbell. The two men collapsed to the floor on either side while I stumbled backwards spitting foul goop out of my mouth. And that was all the space Martin needed to do his monster-hunter thing.
With his right hand raised towards the creature Smith uttered some words my brain couldn't process. Then he clenched his hand into a fist, and the giant unholy spider began to twitch and convulse like it landed on a mains power line.
I had to scramble all the way back to the opposite wall to avoid it as it thrashed about on the floor, then after a few more seconds it finally stopped moving all together. Another second or two later and all its dozens of limbs went limp, and at long last it seemed to be dead. Only then did Marten relax his hand and let his arm drop to his side.
"Carter!" I gasped as I dashed forward to check on the fallen inspector, "Are you ok?!"
He was laying face down on the floor in the far left corner of the shed. His beige trench coat ended up mostly covering him, but to my immense relief he slowly started moving just a moment later. That relief was short-lived though, as I suddenly noticed the long chestnut locks spilling forth from the inspector's head.
With a soft feminine groan Carter pulled himself upright, and I found myself staring at what appeared to be an attractive brunette in her early forties. Her rich brown hair hung down a dozen centimetres past her shoulders, and even in the dark shed interior I could tell she had a pretty face, with wide lips and high cheekbones.
"Are you ok?" I asked nervously. "How do you feel?"
The inspector sighed, "Tired. Dizzy. Confused. What's the matter with my voice?"
I grimaced, "It got you. The monster. It uh..."
"The bloody thing got its hooks in the both of us," a high-pitched feminine voice commented with a thick Scottish accent from the opposite end of the shed.
Campbell was upright now as well, and sure enough instead of a stocky bearded man I found myself looking at a Celtic beauty with long red hair and bright green eyes.
The redhead made a face as he added, "I'd say bollocks, but it feels like I'm fresh out."
I had no idea how to respond to that, so I turned my attention back to the inspector again. "Can you stand? We should probably get out of here. And get cleaned up, I'm not sure it's a good idea to leave this gunk all over us."
Carter nodded as he reached over to pick up his torch then struggled to get up.
I ended up helping him to his feet, and that's when we both got the next surprise. The inspector's clothes were hanging off his new femme body, which had lost a good fifteen centimetres in height compared to his original form. It meant I was actually taller than him now, and I could see it in his pretty hazel eyes that he was still processing all the new sensations.
"Try not to panic ok?" I told him. "I know this is a lot, but you're alive and that's the main thing."
I added, "That spell, remember? You can use it to fix yourself. You'll have to wait a month, but start doing the prep spell at the new moon, then you can turn yourself back to normal at the full moon next month. Be part of the eighth wave."
"Fair warning," Colin commented as he looked down at his own ill-fitting clothing. "That spell might not be much use to us. Remember what Martin and I said, how the damn thing fed on male life force? It obviously didn't drain us completely since we're still breathing, but depending how much it took..."
My eyes widened as his voice trailed off, "What are you saying? Without that male energy you might not be able to change back?"
"Or wait," I added nervously. "Without any masculine life force that just leaves you with the feminine... Are you saying that's actually changed you into women? I mean the changes are more than just physical?"
"That was Grace's theory," Martin replied. "Colin and I knew it was a possibility when we took the assignment. At least it means there probably won't be any dysphoria. We even picked new names in advance, just incase. Isn't that right, Phoebe?"
"Stuff it Shelly," Colin responded with a scowl. "Don't think I won't still kick your arse. After my head's stopped spinning anyways."
"Worst thing is I'm probably going to spend the next month getting poked and prodded and examined by Dr. Bishop," he grumbled as he slowly got to his feet. Then once he was standing his eyes widened for a moment, before he let out an angry curse. "Goddess damn it! Why'd I have to end up being the short-stack of the group?!"
Sure enough the redhead was a lot smaller than he used to be. I'd guess maybe a hundred and fifty-five centimetres tall at best. He was practically swimming in his clothes now, having gone from a stocky masc frame to something significantly more petite. Except in the chest area, which he'd obviously just noticed as well. Based on the way he was giving his new bust an experimental poke.
"You know what this means, don't you?" Martin asked with a teasing smile as he looked his friend up and down. "It means you owe me a hundred quid."
The redhead whined, "Damn it Martin, seriously? You really expect me to pay up now?"
"Wait what?" I frowned. "Why are you charging him money? For saving his life? That's terrible! And anyways I had a part in that too you know!"
Colin, or Phoebe perhaps, shook their head, "Nah it's nothing like that. Just a friendly little wager we made up front, about whether or not one of us would fall victim to the damn thing."
"He said it wouldn't get either of us," Martin chimed in. "I bet it'd get at least one of us. And I was right. So pay up, partner."
The redhead pouted, "Later. We need to burn this place to the ground first, destroy the remains along with any other evidence. And I need a damned shower or something, get this slop out of my hair."
"I'm also going to need some new clothes," they added with a little huff and a sigh.
Phoebe continued to complain as the four of us filed out of the small shed, then Carter and I watched in amazement as the other two raised their hands and pointed at the old wooden structure. They mumbled some more indecipherable words, and a moment later the old building was ablaze. Then we all hurried back through the trees towards the Land Rover.
Our get-away encountered a slight delay at that point, while Carter took a few seconds to adjust the drivers seat and mirrors to account for his new stature. Then the engine rumbled to life and we were off.
As we got moving I asked the redhead, "Are you serious about changing your name? Are you really going to start going by Phoebe from now on? And what about pronouns, will you start using she-her pronouns now too?"
"Yeah I suppose so," she shrugged. "Like Martin said, we were warned up front what could happen, I knew this was a possibility. So what the hell? Ms Phoebe Campbell doesn't sound so bad."
That left me with some mixed emotions, but for now I just scowled at both her and Martin. "You might have shared that warning with the inspector and I earlier, you know?"
Phoebe rolled her eyes, "Slipped my mind. Anyways I doubt it would have scared either of you off."
Carter didn't have anything to say about that. Instead as we pulled back out onto Danby Lane he commented, "Normally I'd be hauling you two straight into the detachment office in Castleton to record your statements, but I don't believe I'm feeling up for that right now. If I drop you off at the pub so you can collect your SUV, will you still be about in the morning so we can collect your statements then?"
Phoebe nodded, "Aye we'll be here. I'd rather you took us straight back to our rental cottage though, if you don't mind? I don't want to muck up my nice leather interiors with this slime. I need a shower first, Martin and I can pick up my Grandland later."
"All right then," the inspector replied. "As long as I've got your word you'll be available tomorrow."
Martin and Phoebe both promised, so we continued on to let them out at the rental cottage. And needless to say we didn't need to ask for directions, since we already knew exactly where the two were staying.
After Smith and Campbell left the vehicle I moved into the passenger seat next to the inspector. Then as we got moving again he shook his head and sighed, "I have no idea how I'm going to explain any of this. Either to my superiors in Whitby, or all my colleagues here in town."
A moment later he grimaced, "And what the hell am I going to tell Maureen?"
"I don't know sir," I replied in what I hoped was a compassionate tone. "But I'll do whatever I can to help."
He thanked me as we pulled over to stop in front of Mrs. Whitmore's B&B. "Here you go detective. I'm sure you're as eager to get yourself cleaned up and sorted out as I am."
I couldn't argue with that, but I still hesitated regardless. I gave him a worried look as I responded, "Honestly sir I'm not entirely comfortable leaving you alone right now."
"Why don't I stay with you tonight?" I suggested, "To make sure you're going to be ok. I know it's not really the same thing, but I do have some experience with er, gender matters. I might be able to help."
He frowned, then bit his lower lip as he seemed to consider my offer. After a few seconds he sighed, "I appreciate the offer Trillium, but I don't think that will be necessary."
"I'm sure I'll be fine," he added before I could argue. "And if I'm not, then I'll give you a call. Alright?"
I could tell from his tone that his mind was made up, so I just nodded as I unbuckled my seatbelt. "All right sir. Good luck."
"Have a good night Sharpe," Carter replied. "I'll see you in the morning."