For the umpteenth time, Chu Yishan began doubting her own judgment. [Maybe he really doesn’t have a System?]
After all, this was already Sang Xiaotian’s third failed attempt to distinguish between sin, cos, and tan in trigonometry.
[With grades like these, shouldn’t he have been eliminated during the Placement Exam?!] Chu Yishan demanded of her System. [I remember you saying that Quanzhou’s main campus eliminates fifty students!]
The System checked. [Sang Xiaotian ranked fifty-second from the bottom at the time.]
Chu Yishan: […Even so, there’s no way he should be this bad!! With his ability, he’d be considered below average even in primary school!]
As she cursed inwardly, she raised her head and looked at the silent Sang Xiaotian, wondering whether this possible fellow transmigrator was pretending to be stupid.
Perhaps if he acted stupid enough, the teacher would eventually sigh and ask Jiang Wan to tutor him… Wait, so that was his strategy? How cunning!
Chu Yishan gritted her teeth and contacted her System. [Check the mission progress.]
The System replied, […The other party’s comprehension rate is 0.9%, and your tutoring time is 48 minutes.]
Chu Yishan looked up at Sang Xiaotian again, her face twisting into an expression of agony. [It’s still only 0.9%? Couldn’t you at least round it up for me?]
The System added, [Host, there is another possibility.]
Chu Yishan replied weakly, [Let’s hear it.]
The System explained, [The defective System may have already exhausted his usefulness. Following that line of reasoning, it will probably detach from this world very soon.]
Chu Yishan’s expression turned serious for two seconds, but when she looked down at the homework in front of her, her spirits immediately sank again. [Forget it. I’d better finish my own mission first…]
…
Chu Yishan was suffering, and Jiang Wan was entirely responsible for that.
But Jiang Wan was suffering too.
—Because the newly arrived fifth transmigrator was inflicting an extraordinary amount of psychological damage on her.
The new Romantic Conquest System and its transmigrator had taken over the body of the original English Class Representative. This was the first time Jiang Wan had witnessed a transmigrator possessing someone’s body, so she really should have taken the opportunity to gather more information. Unfortunately, the psychological damage was simply too severe.
“Jiang Wan.” A deep male voice sounded nearby.
Here we go.
Jiang Wan expressionlessly raised her eyes toward Shen Pingze, the English Class Representative.
“Hand in your English homework,” Shen Pingze said, looking at her.
The instant Jiang Wan silently placed her exercise book in his hand, Shen Pingze’s expression suddenly changed, and he began collapsing toward the floor. He eventually managed to support his unsteady body on one knee and let out a long breath. “Thank goodness. I didn’t get your exercise book dirty.”
Jiang Wan: “…”
Shen Pingze raised his head while supporting himself on his knee, deliberately lowering his voice. “It must be because the name Jiang Wan carries so much weight that holding something bearing your name feels unbearably heavy.”
Jiang Wan tried desperately to endure it, but her toes still curled inside her shoes from secondhand embarrassment.
Then Shen Pingze’s System announced, [Mission Complete. Emotional Fluctuation Points +1. Current Emotional Fluctuation Points: 6. For every 10 points accumulated, you may exchange them for 10 Talent Points from any character around you.]
Shen Pingze thought, [Tch, only one point? What an unyielding woman. Is it really so difficult for her to develop feelings for someone else?]
Jiang Wan: “…” WHY DO YOU HAVE TO TALK LIKE THAT EVEN WHEN YOU’RE SPEAKING TO YOUR SYSTEM INSIDE YOUR HEAD?!
Jiang Wan decided she wouldn’t sleep tonight. She was going to spend the entire night undergoing intensive desensitization training.
As a fictional character fighting against transmigrators, she absolutely refused to admit defeat!
After finally enduring until the end of supervised evening study, she discovered that torrential rain had begun pouring outside the teaching building.
Jiang Wan glanced out the window while packing her schoolbag, but she wasn’t particularly worried.
—Someone as forgetful as her had never developed the habit of checking weather forecasts or bringing an umbrella. There was always someone else worrying about such things on her behalf.
Even if all her roommates were absent, Yue Mingshi would come and escort her back to the dormitory.
“Jiang Wan, didn’t bring an umbrella?” Unfortunately, Shen Pingze appeared again. “—Would you like to descend into this pitch-black night with me?”
Jiang Wan didn’t answer. Instead, she began wondering whether the original Shen Pingze would still have the will to continue living in this world once the transmigrator left his body.
But if Zhou Wenxing could survive it, Shen Pingze probably could too… right?
“Shen Pingze, what are you doing?” Jiang Wan’s Dorm Leader arrived carrying an umbrella. She eyed Shen Pingze suspiciously, noticing that he had both hands planted on Jiang Wan’s desk. “What are you trying to do to Jiang Wan?”
“How could I possibly do anything inappropriate to our little princess?” Shen Pingze chuckled softly. “Cheng Lixue, you’re worrying far too much.”
Cheng Lixue exaggeratedly rubbed the goosebumps off her arms.
Jiang Wan had been enduring this all evening, but she finally couldn’t take it anymore.
Pointing at her temple, she asked with genuine concern, “Has there been a robbery in there? Do you need me to call the police?”
Cheng Lixue undid the fastening strap on her umbrella and casually stuffed the phone charging cable Jiang Wan had forgotten on her desk into her schoolbag. “Shen Pingze, stop being so cringe. Can’t you speak normally?”
“What does ‘cringe’ mean?” Jiang Wan asked casually as she pushed the end of the charging cable back inside her bag and zipped it up.
Cheng Lixue thought for a moment, then pressed the button on her umbrella with a sharp click, opening it right there in the classroom.
Jiang Wan, who had just finished closing her bag, suddenly found her vision darkening.
Cheng Lixue held the umbrella over Jiang Wan’s head. In an instant, her expression transformed into one of dramatic determination, as though she were declaring, Even if the heavens pour down rain, I’ll hold this umbrella for you alone.
She pointed angrily at Shen Pingze. “Just hearing what you said earlier made my heart skip a beat! Who do you think Jiang Wan is? She’s the person our Class Six—and even the whole of Quanzhou—cherishes most dearly!”
Shen Pingze: “…”
Standing beneath the umbrella, Jiang Wan felt absolutely nothing. “…Here we go again, huh?”
“But what were you thinking, Shen Pingze?” Cheng Lixue’s eyes blazed as she continued with theatrical passion. “You think Jiang Wan is someone you can casually flirt with? You can’t possibly bear the weight of everything that represents! Kindly address her as Little Wan… no, as Goddess Wan! Thank you!”
Jiang Wan pushed aside the wobbling black umbrella and said faintly, “…You already let it slip, didn’t you?”
Is there anyone in this school besides me who isn’t a complete drama queen?
Oh, right. I just participated in the great battle at Quanzhou’s Hogwarts branch campus with them.
Never mind, then.
Quanzhou students don’t criticize their fellow Quanzhou students.
Jiang Wan took a deep breath and shouldered her schoolbag. “Let’s go.”
“Oh.” Cheng Lixue closed her long-handled umbrella, then gave Shen Pingze another look. “Still want to compete with me in cringe literature?”
Shen Pingze: “…No, thanks.”
He even took a cautious, almost reverent half-step backward to make way for Jiang Wan and Cheng Lixue.
Jiang Wan walked past Shen Pingze without giving him another glance.
But she heard his voice screaming inside his head, overwhelmed by shame and indignation.
[AAAAAH! DID YOU SEE THE WAY THEY LOOKED AT ME?! THEY DEFINITELY THINK THERE’S SOMETHING WRONG WITH MY BRAIN! MY LIFE IS OVER!!]
The System replied, [Your life ended a long time ago.]
[I told you ages ago that you picked the wrong person! I can’t complete missions like this…] Shen Pingze complained tearfully. [No, I can’t keep doing this. I’m going to write a resignation letter.]
The System replied, [There is no such thing as resignation in the profession of being a Host.]
Shen Pingze said lifelessly, [You’re completely useless.]
System: […]
In a calm, humble tone, as though even the collapse of the entire world before his eyes wouldn’t surprise or devastate him, Shen Pingze said, [And I’m even worse than useless. I’m a paramecium. Hehehe.]
Jiang Wan: “…” Isn’t this guy just an overworked corporate employee?
The System attempted to comfort Shen Pingze. [Host, your performance over the past half hour deserves a seven out of ten.]
Jiang Wan thought that was certainly true. Even his internal monologue sounded convincingly pretentious.
Shen Pingze exploded. [DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MUCH COURAGE IT TOOK ME TO BUILD UP ENOUGH SHAME ENERGY TO ACT LIKE THAT FOR HALF AN HOUR?! IT WAS HARDER THAN GETTING A CALL FROM MY BOSS AT FIVE IN THE MORNING AND DRAGGING MYSELF OUT OF BED TO WORK OVERTIME!]
Jiang Wan: “…” YOU REALLY ARE A CORPORATE DRONE! AND ONE WHO’S BEEN COMPLETELY MANIPULATED BY CAPITALIST BOSSES!
“Don’t you think Shen Pingze is acting a little strange?” Cheng Lixue asked in confusion after they left the classroom, swinging her umbrella. “He never used to talk like that. Today it’s like he suddenly fell and damaged his brain.”
“Maybe that’s just puberty,” Jiang Wan suggested, withdrawing her attention.
“That’s true. Boys are all idiots.” Cheng Lixue accepted the explanation immediately. “But when it comes to competing in cringe dialogue and melodramatic teenage angst, I won’t lose! I’ve got plenty of experience! Next time he comes to harass you, I’ll immediately rush over to protect you!”
Jiang Wan: “…” I don’t want to know where all that experience came from.
Although she desperately wanted to make a sarcastic remark, Cheng Lixue really had charged in and overwhelmed Shen Pingze with a devastating combination of verbal attacks.
So Jiang Wan took a lollipop from her schoolbag and handed it to her. “Thank you.”
Cheng Lixue: =口=
Jiang Wan: “?”
Cheng Lixue stopped walking and pulled out her phone, her eyes sparkling. “Say that again! I want to record it so I can show off to Su Li and Lin Xiaoqing later.”
Jiang Wan: “…If you don’t want the lollipop, give it back.”
…
Sang Xiaotian was extremely anxious.
Even though his Intelligence Points were already hovering dangerously between the levels of an ordinary person and someone with an intellectual disability, he could still recognize that he was only one step away from falling into the abyss.
Once his Intelligence Points actually dropped below seventy, he might not even be capable of thinking normally the way he could now!
…Although thinking was already becoming rather difficult.
Sang Xiaotian rubbed his temples and looked toward Jiang Wan, who was sitting by the window in the front row.
Their next class happened to be PE, so many students had taken advantage of the break to go to the restroom and change clothes. Jiang Wan, who had arrived at school already wearing sportswear, didn’t need to bother. She was reading while waiting for her friends.
Sang Xiaotian clenched his fists and attempted to negotiate with his System. [System, give me an easy mission. If I become intellectually disabled, you won’t benefit either, will you?]
The System replied mercilessly, [The difficulty has already been adjusted once according to the Host’s circumstances. You must wait before another adjustment can be made.]
Sang Xiaotian: […] Are you a bank customer service representative evaluating my credit card limit?!
He made up his mind. If he failed the next mission, he would immediately unbind himself from the System before it could impose a punishment. That way, he could at least preserve the thirty Intelligence Points he had left.
But he couldn’t unbind himself now, because there was still a chance to turn things around.
He could still take one last gamble! As long as he succeeded this time, everything would be fine from then on!
Sang Xiaotian took a deep breath and said to his System with the determination of someone burning his bridges, [I’m ready. Issue the mission.]
The System announced, [Mission Issued: During PE class, receive a drink or water personally handed to you by Jiang Wan. Success will extract 1 Intelligence Point from Jiang Wan. Failure will deduct 1 Intelligence Point from the Host.]
The enormous weight pressing on Sang Xiaotian’s chest lifted halfway.
—This mission really was simple. Although the reward was correspondingly small, it was perfectly suited to someone like him, who desperately needed to escape the danger zone.
All he had to do was pretend to be dying of thirst, collapse beside Jiang Wan, and ask her for help.
Simple!
Sang Xiaotian clenched his fists and stood up from his seat.
…
“Jiang Wan—”
Jiang Wan raised her head toward the classroom doorway. The three girls who had gone to change clothes had finally returned.
She closed the Portuguese-Chinese dictionary in her hands and stood up. Under Sang Xiaotian’s intensely hopeful gaze, which he was desperately trying to disguise as indifference, she picked up her enormous water bottle.
“Every time I see you carrying that giant water bottle, I think it’s absolutely adorable,” Cheng Lixue said with a smile. “It suits you perfectly.”
Jiang Wan glanced at her and ignored the unspoken implication behind the compliment.
“That’s because I chose it so well.” Su Li raised her chin proudly. “I examined every single water bottle in the shop and conducted a thorough inspection before buying the biggest one they had!”
Jiang Wan said expressionlessly, “I can’t even hold it steady with one hand.”
Su Li replied, “That’s exactly why it’s cute!”
Lin Xiaoqing quickly reached out, pinched Su Li’s lips shut, and glared at her.
“Although it does have one function I hadn’t considered before,” Jiang Wan said, looking at the water bottle.
“What is it?”
“It would hurt a lot if you hit someone with it,” Jiang Wan replied.
All three roommates simultaneously looked at the water bottle, which was even bigger than a brick.
“…”
“Who upset you?” Cheng Lixue asked with certainty.
“No one.” Jiang Wan thought for a moment before explaining, “A medical drama I watched a few days ago mentioned that blunt-force injuries can sometimes be more serious than injuries caused by sharp objects. It just occurred to me.”
A classmate walking nearby casually joined the conversation. “What drama?”
“ER,” Jiang Wan answered without blinking. After a brief pause, she added, “Emergency doctors are really cool.”
The other students enthusiastically joined the discussion.
“I think so too! Saving lives right out of the Grim Reaper’s hands is unbelievably cool!”
“Little Wan, did you know I’m planning to become a doctor? I just taught myself CPR a few days ago! Do you know the five key points of CPR?”
“Huh? Aren’t there ten key points?”
Having successfully steered the conversation in another direction, Jiang Wan prepared to leave the stage to her drama-loving classmates.
If you can’t beat them, join them. Mm.
…
“…Look, you’ve already finished your Diagnostic Exams,” the PE teacher said with his hands on his hips. “So today’s PE class will also be a physical fitness test. Eight hundred meters for the girls and fifteen hundred meters for the boys. Now pair up and start warming up!”
The students from Classes Five and Six immediately began wailing.
“Nooooo—!”
“Aren’t physical fitness tests supposed to be announced in advance? Don’t spring a surprise attack on us, Teacher!”
“Teacher, it’s that time of the month for me!”
The PE teacher snapped, “Aren’t you a boy?! Go warm up with the other boys!”
Cheng Lixue acted first. “Jiang Wan, want to pair up?”
Jiang Wan nodded indifferently.
Eight hundred meters wasn’t particularly difficult for her. It was only about as much exercise as she’d normally do for a warm-up.
“All right, follow my movements—”
As Jiang Wan warmed up, she began mentally reviewing the dozens of Portuguese words she’d just studied in her dictionary, mechanically following the others through each movement.
“Stand back-to-back with your partner and link arms. Good. Now the student on the left bends forward—”
Cheng Lixue, who stood 174 centimeters tall, bent forward, and Jiang Wan, at 159.5 centimeters, immediately found both feet lifted off the ground.
Cheng Lixue: “Hehehe.”
Jiang Wan snapped back to attention. “…Is this why you wanted to pair up with me?”
Cheng Lixue: “Hehehehehe! Isn’t it fun?”
Jiang Wan smiled at her too.
The PE teacher continued, “Good. Now switch. The student on the right bends forward—”
Jiang Wan planted her feet firmly on the ground, tightened her linked arms, exhaled, and bent forward. With sheer determination, she managed to lift Cheng Lixue’s feet a full fifteen centimeters off the ground, nearly sending her sliding headfirst toward the ground.
Completely unprepared, Cheng Lixue blurted out a terrified “Damn!”
The girls nearby burst into loud applause.
“Miracles happen when you use enough strength!”
“Lift her higher!”
“Make her do a headstand!”
Cheng Lixue: “…WHAT HAPPENED TO OUR CLASSMATE BOND?!”
“Want to play again next time?” Jiang Wan asked.
Cheng Lixue shook her head repeatedly. “No, no, never again! Next time I’ll do it with Lin Xiaoqing. She’s only 161 centimeters tall.”
Lin Xiaoqing, who had been applauding from just three meters away, slowly lost her smile. “…Jiang Wan, where’s that water bottle you said would really hurt if you hit someone on the head with? Can I borrow it?”
…
Not far away, the boys were absentmindedly warming up while watching the girls, their voices filled with envy.
“That looks so nice. I want to go over there too…”
“Want someone to lift you up? I can help.”
“Damn, stay away from me! I’m not into guys!”
Sang Xiaotian couldn’t join their conversation. He stared at the running track and sank into thought for a moment before speaking.
[System.]
The System replied, [Host.]
Sang Xiaotian said, [There’s a very serious problem.]
The System asked, [What is it?]
Sang Xiaotian admitted, [I might faint before I’ve even run a thousand meters.]
The System replied, [I see. Strength, speed, and intelligence—all F-rank, then?]
Sang Xiaotian had no idea what the System was talking about. With a heavy heart, he was assigned to the first group and prepared to run two laps around the track before pretending to collapse from exhaustion beside Jiang Wan.
The System encouraged him. [That’s right. You already have experience with sliding onto your knees. You performed the movement perfectly last time. Just do it again.]
Sang Xiaotian: […]
…
Jiang Wan had been assigned to the third group, so she stood beside the sports field waiting.
While she was still mentally reviewing Portuguese vocabulary, the girls beside her suddenly began discussing something.
“Did someone fall over there?”
“No, I think someone fainted?”
“Who is that? I can’t see clearly.”
“Looks like… Sang Xiaotian?”
Jiang Wan looked up.
Sang Xiaotian was sprawled face-first on the running track. He hadn’t even completed one lap, having covered only about three hundred meters.
Jiang Wan: “…” Didn’t you just say you could run a thousand meters?!
…
Sang Xiaotian struggled to turn himself over while gasping for breath. His thick prescription glasses had been flung away when he fell, leaving nothing but blurry patches of color in his vision.
He stretched a hand desperately toward Jiang Wan’s direction. “Water… Give me water…”
But his vision was soon swallowed by a hopeless darkness.
—A group of helpful boys waiting beside the track had gathered around him.
One professionally leaned down to listen to Sang Xiaotian’s heartbeat, another vigorously pinched the pressure point beneath his nose, and a third rolled up his sleeves and shouted, “Everyone move aside! I’ll give him CPR! I still remember the five key points of CPR!”
“You remembered wrong! There are ten key points!”
Amid the chaos, someone pressed down hard on Sang Xiaotian’s chest, making him feel as though his breastbone had nearly fractured.
He grimaced in pain and reached out to stop them. “No, I want water…”
“See? Sang Xiaotian said ‘no’! Your five key points are wrong! Let me do it! My turn, my turn!”
Sang Xiaotian was barely breathing. “I want to drink…”
The Sports Representative, who was bent down close to Sang Xiaotian, frowned and shouted, “Quiet down, all of you! He’s trying to say something! —Sang Xiaotian, what do you want to drink?”
Sang Xiaotian felt an overwhelming sense of relief. “I want to drink Jiang Wan’s water.”
The surrounding boys stared at him expressionlessly for several seconds.
Sang Xiaotian: “?”
The Sports Representative was the first to jump up. “Well, well! You look so honest, but you actually came up with a trick like pretending to be sick?!”
“Damn it! In your dreams!”
“Who wouldn’t want that?!”
“That’s the whole reason I joined the Tennis Club! Whenever Jiang Wan comes to watch Yue Mingshi, she buys water for everyone!”
“What makes you think you deserve special treatment?! Get up and keep running!”
Several boys grabbed Sang Xiaotian and hauled him to his feet. Two or three of them supported him as they began running forward together.
The male PE teacher finally arrived. “What’s going on?”
The group of boys swept past along the running track, still energetic enough to answer loudly.
“Teacher, Sang Xiaotian ran out of strength, so we’re helping him!”
“That’s right, Teacher! This is the spirit of friendship between classmates!”
“And friendship between different classes!”
Sang Xiaotian struggled in vain. He could only watch in despair as the girls disappeared rapidly from his field of vision. His eyelids grew heavier and heavier until he finally collapsed into genuine unconsciousness from exhaustion.
The girls who had watched the entire incident were speechless.
“What on earth are they doing…?”
“They’re so stupid.”
“They really love showing off. Like peacocks spreading their tails.”
Jiang Wan said calmly, “Isn’t it wonderful? Such friendship between classmates.”
Less than half a minute later, the boys came running back in a panic, carrying Sang Xiaotian.
“Teacher! Sang Xiaotian fainted from heatstroke!”
By the time Jiang Wan stepped onto the running track, a teacher had already carried Sang Xiaotian to the school medical station on his back.
His System delivered its judgment in a cold voice.
[Host has lost consciousness. Estimated time until awakening: 37 minutes. Mission deemed failed. Intelligence Points -1. Current Intelligence Points: 69, below the normal threshold. Host deemed incapable of continuing missions. System separation commencing.]
When Jiang Wan effortlessly completed her eight-hundred-meter run and reached the finish line, a gentle notification sounded in her mind.
“World Restoration Progress: 2.5/15.”
Jiang Wan: “…”
She couldn’t help looking back at Chu Yishan, who had just finished running in the previous group, and sighing.
Sang Xiaotian was different from the transmigrators. He had retained his own consciousness; he’d simply been tricked into binding himself to a defective System.
—Jiang Wan had known about that difference for some time, but she hadn’t realized it meant he would only count for 0.5.
In other words, Chu Yishan herself wasn’t worth 1/15 at all. She was only worth 1/30, and her System accounted for the other 1/30.
Chu Yishan, who hadn’t even caught her breath yet, looked up in confusion and met Jiang Wan’s disappointed gaze.
Chu Yishan: “…?” Why are you so disappointed in me? What did I do?! HUH???