Yan Hui’s breathing grew slightly hurried, her cheeks warm, her discomfort increasing. “I’ll try my best.” Her voice was low and heavy. All her careful thoughts seemed exposed before this man. From the moment her uncle had told her she must replace Wang Yulong to marry the Li family’s second son, she had thought—there was no better path than marrying him.
Her parents had died mysteriously, and her younger brother had left without support. With the Li family as reliance, she and Yan Shi would no longer live in constant fear, nor would the Wang family control Yan Shi.
Most importantly, things she had once been forbidden to touch—after marrying Li Suyu, she could finally reach for them. She knew well that her parents’ deaths hid deep, unfathomable waters. Before, she had not dared to probe the cause of their deaths. The figures involved—how could she possibly shake them? But if she lived on in cowardly silence, forgetting her parents’ wrongful deaths, how could she call herself their daughter?
Back in Bianjing, she had already resolved—she must seize this man.
“What are you thinking?” The man’s voice pulled Yan Hui back from her thoughts. She turned her gaze slightly, looking at Li Suyu from the corner of her eye. “I was thinking that what I’ve done for the General carries no false intent.”
“No one said your actions were false,” Li Suyu replied with a smile. “But that detached, indifferent air of yours—as if nothing concerns you—is truly unpleasant.”
Yan Hui’s expression hardened, her eyes shifting as she stared deeply at the man’s faint smile. “Then what should I do? When your grandmother arranges equal wives and concubines for you, should I hide in my room and weep in secret, playing the resentful woman?”
Li Suyu’s brows shifted slightly, but he said nothing.
Yan Hui drew in a shallow breath. *Does this man really want to see me become that pitiful figure?*
Suddenly, his face leaned close. Yan Hui instinctively moved back a little.
Seeing this, Li Suyu smiled. “No, I like the real Yan Hui.”
*Real?*
Yan Hui lowered her eyes, hiding the sudden flicker of emotion within them.
“Like the way you spoke to me about the northern frontier’s situation last time—that was the real you.”
Yan Hui lifted her gaze.
Li Suyu’s eyes deepened further.
“What are you afraid of?” he raised his brows, his gaze vast as the sea. “Have you grown too used to disguising yourself in the Wang household?”
The sound of carriage wheels grinding against stone rang rhythmically, perfectly masking the beat of Yan Hui’s heart. She met his gaze directly.
“There are many things I fear. Does the General want to hear them?”
“Of course,” the man said with a faint curve of his lips.
Yan Hui’s brows knit slightly. Though she kept her composure, Li Suyu had already seen through her. Yet she still chose to keep up the act.
“The General was born in the northern frontier, a place so free and unrestrained. Even when facing the barbarians, you could still live with ease. But ever since my parents died, my younger brother and I have only been barely surviving.”
“The Yan clan in Yunzhou was a family of some standing. My father served as Yunzhou’s Vice Magistrate. With my uncle’s family’s support, we should have risen steadily. But that year, my father offended someone. He and my mother died in the study. I remember—the study had been disturbed, many things had moved. It must have been that my father held something those people wanted.”
“At that time, my clansmen came to the estate after my parents’ deaths, demanding I hand over the family property my father had accumulated and my mother’s dowry. They claimed it was to safeguard it for my younger brother. But how could I not know that once our possessions fell into their hands, they would never return them?”
“So I sold everything that could be sold, and took my brother to Bianjing overnight.”
“To be honest with the General, the reason I went to seek refuge with my uncle was because my brother could not live as I do. I, as a woman, am like a weed—I can survive anywhere. But Yan Shi is different. I could not watch him waste his life. He is gifted, talented, even at a young age. He could not be buried by our parents’ deaths.”
“Though we lived under another’s roof at my uncle’s house, at least my uncle recognized Yan Shi as a promising seedling.”
“Before Yan Shi could stand on his own, I feared everything. But now I realize how naïve I was. My uncle may not let Yan Shi be wasted, but he already sees him as a pawn in his hand—just as he sees me.”
Yan Hui’s lips tightened. “I say all this only to let the General know that the burdens I carry are much like yours. I fear that because of my presence in the Li family, the officials in Bianjing will be displeased, and my brother will suffer for it. The Wang family and the Duke of Ying’s household are skilled in their schemes. To deal with Yan Shi would be as easy as crushing an ant.”
“The Emperor truly intends to suppress the Li family. When I replaced Wang Yulong, all of the court understood the Emperor’s meaning. Across the empire, the officials’ connections are intricate, like veins running through Bianjing. The Emperor’s intentions will soon spread throughout the realm.”
“I came to the Li family as nothing more than a pawn to humiliate them. So when the old madam treats me as she does, I can understand, and I can accept it.”
The unspoken meaning was clear: equal wives and concubines—she did not ignore them, but she could not afford to care.
Li Suyu half-squinted, meeting her clear gaze. “With such heavy thoughts, aren’t you tired?”
Yan Hui did not avoid his scrutinizing eyes. “It’s bearable.”
Suddenly, his grip on her hand loosened. Yan Hui frowned, withdrew her hand, and clenched her palm—his warmth still lingered there.
Li Suyu’s eyes were deep as an abyss. From his sleeve, he drew out a slender brocade box. He said: “Grandmother gave this to you.”
Inside the carriage, all sounds seemed to sink into the man’s shadowed, unreadable eyes as he opened the brocade box.
Within lay a simple hairpin—not of great value, just a wooden one. Yet the carved pearl blossoms upon it were exquisite, clusters of roses blooming vividly at the end.
“This was made by Grandfather when he was young. Grandmother cherished it deeply. After Grandfather passed, she never wore it again,” Li Suyu said calmly.
Yan Hui stared unblinkingly at the man before her. He smiled faintly, lifted the wooden hairpin, and slid it into her hair.
A spark lit in Yan Hui’s eyes, and she smiled knowingly. “Thank you.”
Perhaps it was an illusion, but in his eyes there seemed to be gentleness—and caution.
Li Suyu’s smile was light, his brows relaxed, and the coldness deep within his gaze slowly dissipated. He said: “There’s no need to tread so carefully in the Li family. Our people are all good.”
Yan Hui had seen much of the scheming and filth among the noble clans of Bianjing. A family like the Lis was truly rare—united, and even tolerant of someone like her.
“This trip to Yuzhou may take some time. When we return to Yuncheng, it should be just in time for New Year’s Eve,” Li Suyu said softly. “I feared you might not get along well with Grandmother at the estate, so it’s better to bring you along.”
Yan Hui looked at his profile. Since her parents’ deaths, she had never felt such peace. In truth, she realized—she could trust this man.