Madam Lü’s family was drinking their buckwheat porridge when they suddenly heard Second Fool Liu banging his copper basin.
“What is that idiot doing now?” Wu-shi asked.
“Don’t bother with him!” Madam Lü said firmly. “No matter what he shouts, none of us are to pay any attention to him! Understand?”
Liu the Eldest and Wu-shi had never seen Madam Lü so determined to cut off Liu Er before. Knowing she was truly serious this time, they obediently fell silent.
But not long afterward, Liu the Eldest’s older son spoke up.
“Grandma, there seems to be smoke coming from the roof.”
“You little brat, you don’t understand,” Madam Lü said. “Smoke can’t escape when it’s raining. It’s not unusual for there to be a little smoke inside the house.”
“Oh.” Liu the Eldest’s son blinked and asked again, “Then can’t the fire get out either?”
“What fire? Where did you see a fire? If you keep talking nonsense, I’ll spank you!”
“But…” The boy pouted and pointed at the flames on the roof. “There really is a fire!”
Madam Lü and the others looked up.
They instantly panicked.
“Fire!”
“Quick! Someone come help put it out!”
They shouted as they rushed outside.
The entire roof was already engulfed in flames.
“YOU CRAZY WOMAN! I’LL KILL YOU!!!”
Madam Lü screamed, rolled her eyes, and fainted on the spot.
But that one scream was enough to shake heaven and earth, completely drowning out the sound of Second Fool Liu’s copper basin.
“Quick, quick, quick! Everyone come help put out the fire!”
Although the village chief’s innocence had been violated by Madam Lü, when someone’s house caught fire, the old man still did his duty.
He led the entire village over, everyone carrying pots, bowls, basins, and whatever else they could use to carry water.
But it was already too late.
The Liu family’s roof was made of thatch, and there was a huge pile of dry firewood beneath the back eaves.
Once the flames caught, everything went up in fire.
All they could do was watch helplessly as the roof and all the furniture inside the house burned to ashes, leaving behind nothing but blackened earthen walls.
Faced with this sudden disaster, everyone tactfully remained silent.
Only Second Fool Liu’s voice continued echoing through the night.
Bang, bang, bang—
“It’s dry and windy!”
“My mother’s house has burned to the ground!”
…
When Madam Lü woke up and saw that her house had been burned until it looked like a bald bachelor from Java—completely black and hairless—she immediately burst into tears.
“Village Chief! You have to stand up for my family this time!”
“That crazy woman definitely did this!”
“You can’t let her get away with it!”
“Send her to the authorities! She must be sent to the authorities!”
Seeing how miserable she was, the old village chief temporarily put aside what had happened the previous night.
Taking the matter seriously, he had someone call Xiang Xi and Second Fool Liu over.
“Xiang-shi, were you the one who started the fire?”
Xiang Xi naturally gave the classic three-part answer:
“Not me. I didn’t do it. I don’t know anything.”
“If it wasn’t you, then who could it be?” Madam Lü glared at Xiang Xi, looking as though her eyes were about to pop out. “You damned crazy woman! Even if I have to risk my life, I’ll send you to the authorities today!”
“Not me. I didn’t do it. I don’t know anything.”
“You…” Madam Lü was so furious she nearly lost her soul.
She turned to the village chief.
“Village Chief, hurry and have someone tie her up!”
The village chief was wondering whether he should have Xiang Xi restrained immediately when Second Fool Liu suddenly jumped out.
Bang, bang, bang—
“Don’t argue! Don’t make trouble!”
Bang, bang, bang—
“I burned my mother’s house!”
Village Chief: …
He had seen stupid people before, but he’d never seen anyone this stupid!
Setting fire to someone’s house wasn’t a minor offense.
He could be beaten with a cane and thrown into prison!
Who in their right mind would do something like that and then beat a drum while going around announcing that they were the culprit?
Madam Lü was stunned too.
Was her stupid son truly beyond saving?
“Madam Lü,” the village chief asked, “do you still want to report this to the authorities?”
Madam Lü gritted her teeth.
“Of course!”
“You’d better think carefully,” the village chief warned. “If you really report it, Liu Er will be beaten and thrown into prison.”
“No, that’s not how it happened,” Madam Lü hurriedly said. “My son is an idiot! What does he know about setting fires? That crazy woman must have instructed him! Village Chief, have your people tie up that crazy woman!”
The village chief looked troubled.
“It’s true that your son is an idiot, but… Xiang-shi is crazy too.”
The implication was obvious.
It wasn’t certain who had instructed whom!
“If you really report this, the most likely outcome is that both of them will be beaten fifty strokes and thrown into prison!”
Madam Lü: …
Ahhhhh!
Why had she been possessed by the devil back then and married that crazy woman to her second son?
Was it because she had dominated Nan Zhu Village for too many years, and even Heaven couldn’t stand it anymore, so this was her punishment?
Bah!
She refused to believe in any of that nonsense!
Her fate was in her own hands, not Heaven’s!
“Madam Lü?” the village chief asked. “Are you tying her up or not? Give me an answer.”
“Don’t tie her up.”
Although she hated Xiang Xi, she couldn’t bear to let her stupid son go to prison.
More importantly, if both of them went to prison, she’d have to deliver food to them every day.
Wouldn’t that mean losing her house and having to spend money feeding them too?
That would be losing everything!
The village chief secretly breathed a sigh of relief.
If they tied them up, they’d have to send them to the authorities.
If they sent them to the authorities, there would be a trial.
If there was a trial, he’d have to appear as a witness.
And because something had happened in his village, the county magistrate would probably give him a good scolding.
This was much better.
The mother wouldn’t pursue the matter, the son and daughter-in-law wouldn’t be punished, and the village chief wouldn’t get yelled at.
Everyone was happy.
As for the house that had burned down…
A house couldn’t feel pain.
What was the big deal about burning it down?
“All right, everyone, disperse!”
The house had burned down, and the matter had been settled.
Xiang Xi was satisfied too.
What goes around comes around.
Madam Lü had received her punishment, and that was enough.
There was no need to completely destroy her.
After all, Xiang Xi wasn’t some vengeful demon who held grudges over everything.
Right?
“Second Fool.”
“Present!”
“Let’s go home.”
“Yes!”
Completely satisfied, Second Fool Liu carried his copper basin and followed Xiang Xi.
Bang, bang, bang—
“It’s dry and windy!”
Bang, bang, bang—
“Be careful with the candles!”
…
The grass huts were gone, and it was raining outside.
So Xiang Xi took Second Fool Liu into the mountains and found a sheltered spot beneath a cliff where they could spend the night.
It wasn’t particularly cold at night during this season.
As long as they kept a fire burning, they didn’t have to worry about getting sick.
Besides, Xiang Xi was already extremely accustomed to living outdoors.
Compared with the hell-level difficulty of the Amazon rainforest, this little bit of wind and rain was nothing.
As for Second Fool Liu, he was carefree and sturdy.
After having good food, good drinks, and plenty of excitement that day, he simply spread some dry grass on the ground and fell fast asleep.
Around midnight, Xiang Xi was awakened by the cries of wild beasts.
She added some firewood to the fire, but after that, she couldn’t fall asleep again.
Bored, she began studying the phantom world once more.
She planned to use it to predict whether any wild beasts would attack them.
But after trying it, she made a major discovery.
Previously, she could see roughly one minute into the future through the phantom world.
But now, to her delight, she discovered that she could see ten minutes into the future!
And while ten minutes passed in the phantom world, only a brief moment passed in reality.
It didn’t even take a second!
This was amazing!
If this ability could keep leveling up, wouldn’t she eventually become a god who could predict the future?
Just thinking about it felt incredible.
As for exactly how the ability leveled up, she still had no idea.
For now, she could only pay more attention to it and use the ability whenever she remembered.
Surely, sooner or later, she’d figure out how to make it level up.