The next few hours blurred into pacing and half formed panic.
I could not sit still, could not focus on anything but the memory of Kael’s sharp blue eyes and Seraphina caught between us like a rope in a game neither of us had agreed to play.
By the time three o’clock rolled around, I had rehearsed a dozen versions of calm in the mirror and believed none of them.
The garden tea table was set beneath a canopy of white blossoms, porcelain cups steaming gently, the afternoon light soft and golden. Seraphina was already seated, and Kael sat across from her, looking every bit like a man who belonged wherever he chose to sit.
"Ethan," Seraphina said, smiling, relief flickering briefly across her face. "You came."
"Said I would." I took the empty seat, which put me directly across from Kael, close enough to see the small scar on his chin catch the light.
"Lord Ethan," Kael said, pouring tea with unhurried precision. "I hope I am not intruding on your afternoon."
"Not at all." Inside my head, the opposite thought screamed louder than I could control. "He is absolutely intruding, he knows he is intruding, this whole tea thing is just him circling closer, watching, waiting for me to slip."
Seraphina’s eyes flicked to me for half a second, something unreadable in them.
Kael leaned back in his chair, easy, unbothered. "Sera tells me you two have grown close these past days."
"We have spoken," I said carefully. "She has been a gracious guest."
"Gracious," Kael repeated, testing the word like it did not quite fit. "That is one way to describe her."
Seraphina cut in smoothly. "Kael, do not interrogate him. We are having tea, not a trial."
He raised both hands, feigning innocence, though his eyes stayed locked on me the whole time. "Merely making conversation. Is that not what tea is for?"
The conversation limped along like that for a while, polite on the surface and razor edged underneath. Trade routes. The weather in the northern province. A dry comment about the Duke’s collection of unnecessarily large statues. Every few minutes Kael would ask something that sounded harmless and land somewhere far too close to the truth, and every time, my thoughts betrayed me a little louder than I wanted.
"He’s fishing, he’s definitely fishing, does he suspect something specific or is this just his personality, why does every question feel like a hook, stop sweating Ethan, drink your tea, look normal, you can do normal."
Seraphina’s mouth twitched, the ghost of a smile she was clearly trying to suppress.
"Something amusing, Sera?" Kael asked, catching it.
"Nothing," she said quickly. "Just enjoying the tea."
I nearly choked on mine.
An hour in, Kael excused himself to send word ahead to his family about his safe arrival, leaving Seraphina and me alone at the table for the first time all afternoon. The moment he was out of earshot, she exhaled like she had been holding her breath the entire time too.
"He suspects something," I said quietly.
"He suspects everything, all the time. It is exhausting to watch, honestly. He has always been like this, even as a child. He cannot let a mystery sit unsolved."
"Great. So I am a mystery now."
"You always were." She poured herself more tea, hands steady despite everything. "Ethan, my father has been negotiating a marriage alliance with Kael’s family. For months now."
The words landed heavier than I expected. "Marriage. To Kael."
"It would be strategic. Beneficial. Everyone would call it a good match." She stared into her cup like it held answers. "The version of me before I met you would have simply accepted it. Smiled, nodded, done as expected."
"And now?"
She looked up, green eyes steady on mine. "Now I am not so sure anymore."
Inside my head, hope and terror collided at exactly the same moment. "She’s not sure, that means there’s a chance, a real one, but what do I even do with that, I cannot ask her to refuse an alliance for me, that is not fair, that is not my choice to make."
"You should do what makes you happy," I said finally. "Not your father. Not Kael. Not anyone but you."
She studied me for a long moment, something soft settling behind her eyes. "That is very wise, for someone who panics about tea etiquette."
"I contain multitudes."
She laughed, real and warm, cutting straight through the tension that had been sitting on my chest all afternoon. "Yes. You certainly do."
We sat in easier silence after that, the garden humming quietly around us, until Kael’s footsteps returned across the gravel path. His expression had shifted slightly, something more measured in it now, like a decision had been made somewhere behind those blue eyes.
"Lord Ethan," he said, sitting back down. "A question, if you do not mind."
"Go ahead." My stomach was already sinking.
"Your sister. Lily. I understand she was sent to a convent some years ago." He said it lightly, but his eyes were anything but light. "I have been curious. What exactly happened to her?"
The garden seemed to go very quiet around me.
"He knows about Lily. How does he know about Lily. Nobody talks about Lily, the novel barely mentions her, this is not supposed to be a thread anyone is pulling yet."
I kept my face as still as I could manage. "She was unwell. Sent away for her health. It was a long time ago."
Kael’s expression did not change, but something behind his eyes sharpened, like a hunter catching a scent. "Unwell. I see."
Seraphina’s hand found mine under the table, quick and reassuring, gone again before Kael could notice.
"That must have been difficult," Kael said, watching me carefully. "Losing a sibling that way. Sudden. Unexplained."
"It was a long time ago," I repeated, because it was the only true thing I could safely say.
He smiled then, thin and knowing. "Of course. Forgive my curiosity. I find families fascinating. All the things they choose not to say."
The system flickered in the corner of my vision, unwelcome and precisely timed.
"Protagonist Kael. Current opinion of you updated. THREATENING. He is actively investigating your family’s secrets. Recommendation. Proceed with extreme caution."
Extreme caution. As if I had been proceeding any other way since the moment I woke up in this body.
Tea ended not long after, polite goodbyes exchanged, Kael’s parting glance lingering on me just a second too long before he walked off toward the guest wing.
Seraphina stayed behind, waiting until he was well out of earshot before turning to me, worry plain on her face now that the performance was over. "He knows something, Ethan. Or he is close to knowing something."
"I know." Eighty four days left, and now the protagonist himself was circling my sister’s secret like he already sensed blood in the water.
"We need to find Lily," Seraphina said, quiet and certain. "Before he does."
I nodded, the countdown ticking silently in the corner of my mind, faster somehow than it had ticked an hour ago. 🍃
We sat there a while longer after Kael disappeared toward the guest wing, the tea gone cold in front of us, neither of us in a hurry to break the quiet.
"How do we even start looking," I finally asked. "I do not even know where the convent is. I barely remember Lily’s face."
"I know where St. Mary’s is," Seraphina said. "My family has donated there for years. My aunt is a benefactress. It would not be strange for me to visit."
"And me?"
"You come as my guest. A reason to travel together without raising questions." She said it simply, like she had already been turning the plan over in her head before I had even finished panicking about it.
"You already thought this through."
"I think about a lot of things you do not hear," she said, a small smile tugging at her mouth. "Not everything broadcasts, Ethan. Just the loud parts."
That should have been comforting. Somehow it was not, not entirely, though I could not explain why.
"When do we leave," I asked.
"Soon. Before Kael digs deeper. Before your father notices we are gone." She glanced toward the guest wing, where Kael’s shadow had long since vanished. "He will not make this easy. Neither of them will."
I looked down at my own hands, pale and unfamiliar even now, three days into wearing them. "None of this has been easy so far."
"No," she agreed. "But you are still here. Still trying." She reached across the table and squeezed my hand once, quick and warm. "That counts for more than you think."
The sun had shifted lower while we sat there, gold light stretching long shadows across the garden path, servants beginning to clear the tea things around us with quiet efficiency.
"We should go before someone asks why we are still sitting here," Seraphina said, standing, smoothing her dress.
I stood too, the countdown ticking somewhere in the back of my mind, steady and indifferent to everything else happening around it.
"Tomorrow," she said. "We start tomorrow."
I nodded, and for the first time since Kael’s name had entered my life, the fear in my chest had something else sitting beside it. Something that almost felt like a plan. 🌆