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The Law of Averages

Chapter 117 / 317

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Chapter 117

The Law of Averages

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19:04 Cornygraham:

i think ur in the clear. feds annoyed w me but whatev. not gonna make any fuss.

19:05 Daniel Newman:

thx. that's a relief

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9:03 CornyGraham:

File attached 51.2kb: LolCat.jpg

9:07 CornyGraham:

File attached 91.1kb: FatCat.jpg

10:25 CornyGraham:

File attached 5.15mb: TubeCat.gif

14:30 CornyGraham:

File attached 60.4kb: PoleCat.jpg

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15:25 Daniel Newman:

how r things goin

15:43 Connor McFancyPants

: You've got to be more specific, Newman. I live an exceptionally busy life.

15:44 Daniel Newman:

with ur powers ass

15:45 Connor McFancyPants:

Things are progressing well. I've found a reliable way to activate them, and I am currently testing my limits. I suspect father will deem it safe for me to appear in public within a week.

15:45 Daniel Newman:

abby says party time once ur out. invite ur grl

15:46 Connor McFancyPants:

I shall inform Freya. Looking forward to it.

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8:30 BUFFBLONDE:

Congratulations Daniel Newman! You have won an all access tour to the APD! Please swing by at your earliest convenience to collect your prize and fill out a job application!

8:33 Daniel Newman:

nothx.

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10:10 Cornygraham:

File attached 42.4kb: EgoCat.jpg

12:04 Cornygraham:

File attached 3.4mb: WaterCat.gif

14:52 Cornygraham:

File attached 1.2mb: GroinhitFail.jpg

18:30 Cornygraham

:

File attached 7.1mb: SallySmiles.jpg

: Jealous?

18:31 Daniel Newman:

is that a pornstar?

18:33 Cornygraham:

;)

18:34 Daniel Newman:

tf is wrong wit u man

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8:30 BUFFBLONDE:

Good morning, Mr. Newman! I am a representative of the Austin Police Department, and I would like to formally invite you to visit the station at your earliest convenience. There are a few questions we'd like to ask you, and an application or two that you need to fill out.

9:17 Daniel Newman:

nah im gud.

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22:05 Cornygraham:

File attached 4.4mb:: DancingCat.gif

: This is me.

22:06 Cornygraham:

File attached 6.2mb: DanceFail.gif

: These are the criminals.

22:07 Cornygraham:

File attached 3.0mb: IAmTheLaw.gif

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8:30 BUFFBLONDE:

Mr. Newman, this is Captain Gable of the APD. I've recently been informed that there is some follow-up paperwork that you need to complete regarding the bomb incident that occurred several months ago. It seems like someone lost track

8:30 BUFFBLONDE:

of it in the shuffle, and we only recently noticed. If you could visit the station and take a look at some documents for us, and maybe hear a pitch or two, that would be most convenient.

8:31 Daniel Newman:

rly gregoir?

8:32 BUFFBLONDE:

You are mistaken, Mr. Newman. As I said before, this is Captain Gable of the APD.

8:32 Daniel Newman:

dude i have ur phone#

8:40 BUFFBLONDE:

This is a general phone number used for all texts by the APD.

8:41 Daniel Newman:

its on ur card.

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8:30 Kaneda Ito:

Good morning Mr. Newman! This isfjoik#! jfln flag.$

8:34 Kaneda Ito:

apples

8:39 Kaneda Ito:

Apologies, Daniel. Gregoir got ahold of my phone for a minute there.

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22:14 Cornygraham:

File attached 1.4mb: TastyTwins.jpg

: Twins! Damn I'm good!

22:17 Daniel Newman:

plz stop.

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10:10 Best Girl<>

Hey Danny! Can you check the freezer back at my house for steak? I think I had a few that are going bad soon. Need to cook them.

10:14 Daniel Newman:

File attached 7.4mb: WTF.jpg

: Why do you have a walk in freezer? How did I not notice this?

10:15 Best Girl<>

I like having options! ¯_(ツ)_/¯

10:17 Daniel Newman:

File attached 7.1mb: meat.jpg

: I don't even know what these words mean.

10:18 Best Girl

Oh! Grab the big wagyu plz! Thx

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1:24 Cornygraham:

we got her.

1:24 Cornygraham:

File attached 4.5mb: HappyCat.gif

1:25 Cornygraham:

heads up tho. u might get called to testify. won't be for a while. nothing major. depends on what she spills.

8:24 Daniel Newman:

congrats on the big catch. and thanks for the heads up. big relief for me.

13:09 Cornygraham:

File attached 7.2mb: AmorousAmy.jpg

: A hero's reward.

13:12 Daniel Newman:

why

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10:15 Connor McFancyPants has started a group chat.

10:15 Connor McFancyPants has invited Daniel Newman to the group chat.

10:15 Connor McFancyPants has invited Freya Valkyrie to the group chat.

10:15 Connor McFancyPants has invited Best Girl

10:16 Connor McFancyPants:

I've been cleared by multiple upgrade analysts. I can now go out in public once more.

10:17 Best Girl<>

Woo! Party time! Our place, eight o'clock! Be there!

10:19 Freya Valkyrie:

Thank you for the invitation, Abigail. I'll make sure Connor arrives on time.

10:20 Daniel Newman:

do i get a say in this?

10:21 Connor McFancyPants:

You know that's not how this works, Newman.

10:21 Best Girl<>

Of course! You get to pick the chips and salsa we're using! Grab some sodas too plz :>

10:22 Daniel Newman:

sigh. yes dear.

10:25 Freya Valkyrie:

I make excellent smoked salmon and caviar canapés.

10:25 Best Girl<>

Oh and alcohol! You can get that from my house. Liquor cabinet combo is my bday.

10:25 Best Girl<>

Maybe something a little simpler Freya?

10:26 Daniel Newman:

caviar is a bit too fancy for this kinda shindig

10:26 Connor McFancyPants:

What would you know about fancy, Newman?

10:27 Daniel Newman:

jackass

10:27 Connor McFancyPants:

Peasant.

10:27 Daniel Newman:

peacock

10:27 Connor McFancyPants:

Simpleton.

10:28 Daniel Newman:

trust fund baby

10:28 Connor McFancyPants:

Sugar baby.

10:28 Best Girl<>

I'll see you all tonight!

10:28 Freya Valkyrie:

Yes.

10:28 Daniel Newman:

fop

10:28 Daniel Newman:

cya'll tonite

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