The moment I crossed the threshold of my apartment, I threw my school bag into the corner and immediately set to work.
Between the first-name standoff with Haruka and the real-estate extortion by the upperclassmen, my brain was completely fried.
I cooked up a rapid plate of cheap stir-fry noodles, ate like a feral raccoon, and then dove straight into a steaming hot bath to wash away the sheer panic of the day.
For a solid twenty-five minutes, I lay submerged like a content piece of boiled daikon radish.
The warm water was pure bliss, completely erasing my memories of Youka Academy, real estate conglomerates, and archery club regulations.
Eventually, the water grew cold.
I reluctantly stepped out of the tub, wrapping a single, somewhat frayed fluffy towel around my damp black hair, and clutched a second, terribly small towel against my chest.
My skin was glistening, completely flushed and pink from the steam, and my damp hair was clinging messily to my bare neck and shoulders.
I stepped into my bedroom, planning to change into my usual oversized cat-print t-shirt.
But as I reached for my dresser, an icy bolt of absolute terror shot straight down my spine.
“Remember the three-minute rule Kurogane-san... I’m calling the asphalt trucks.”
"Oh my god,"
I whimpered, my heart dropping straight into my stomach.
"The text back timer. The parking lot. The target practice."
Completely forgetting that I was literally buck-naked under two flimsy pieces of cotton, I tripped over my own futon and scrambled frantically to grab my smartphone from the kitchen counter.
The screen was practically emitting smoke.
[NOTIFICATION: 24 UNREAD MESSAGES FROM 'Kazari Shiori']
[NOTIFICATION: 11 UNREAD MESSAGES FROM 'Shizuku Fuyumi']
The first messages had arrived exactly fourthy-five minutes ago.
I was fourthy-two minutes past the legal eviction deadline.
[Kazari Shiori]: Kurogane-san~ Are you home yet? I had my personal chef send over a selection of white chocolate strawberries to your neighborhood, but my driver can’t find a building that looks sufficiently safe for human habitation. Please send your exact address. (45 mins ago)
[Kazari Shiori]: Kurogane? it has been four minutes. I am currently looking at a catalog of asphalt pavers. (41 mins ago)
[Kazari Shiori]: Fuyumi says you are probably avoiding us. If you are running away, I will simply buy the cellular tower closest to your district and cut off your internet connection until you text back. (29 mins ago)
[Shizuku Fuyumi]: Kurogane. Confirm your survival status. Your arm muscles should be iced immediately after yesterday's strain. (24 mins ago)
[Shizuku Fuyumi]: Shiori is being dramatic about the parking lot, but I am currently holding a composite hunting bow and looking at a map of your train line. Do not make me track you down. (19 mins ago)
[Shizuku Fuyumi]: ...Are you with Hinata-san at this hour? Answer me. (15 mins ago)
"They are completely unhinged!"
I shrieked to my empty living room, my face turning a fiery shade of crimson as I typed at a speed that defied human anatomy.
[Kurogane Mei]: I AM SO SORRY SENPAIS PLEASE DON'T PAVEOVER MY LANDLORD!!! I just got home and went straight into the bathroom! I was taking a bath!!! I didn't mean to ignore you I swear!!!
I hit send, holding my breath.
Surely, a completely normal explanation like basic human hygiene would diffuse the tension.
PING. PING.
Two text alerts went off simultaneously.
The responses were instantaneous.
[Kazari Shiori]: Oh? A bath? My, my... how incredibly suggestive, Kurogane-san~. Glistening skin, warm water... Were you thinking about us while you were bare in the tub? :Smug
[Shizuku Fuyumi]: A bath. Explains the delay. However, words are easily fabricated. Prove it.
I blinked.
My face reached a temperature that could cook a medium-rare steak.
[Kurogane Mei]: Prove it?! How do I prove I took a bath?! Do you want a picture of the soapy water?! The drain?! What does that even mean?!
[Kazari Shiori]: I think Fuyumi means she wants a selfie, And honestly, so do I. Show us your wet hair. Let us see how flushed your face is. Show us just how soft you look right now. If you don't send proof, I’m calling the asphalt trucks.
[Shizuku Fuyumi]: I merely wish to verify that you are properly drying your hair so you do not catch a cold before tomorrow's practice. A photo of your damp hair and bare shoulders will suffice as physical evidence.
I screamed, my voice cracking.
I looked down at myself.
I was literally standing in the middle of my room, completely naked under a single bath towel that was barely keeping my assets covered.
The steam from the bathroom had left my skin highly sensitive, my cheeks bright pink, and my damp black hair was dripping slowly down the curve of my neck and bare collarbone.
The chat room was spiraling into pure, unadulterated fanservice territory.
My inner closeted lesbian was experiencing a total systemic meltdown.
Two of the most beautiful women in the modern world were casually demanding a post-bath selfie from an NPC.
If I don't send it, my building becomes a parking lot.
If I do send it, I might die of sheer embarrassment.
Groaning in pure defeat, I grabbed my phone, flipped the front-facing camera on, and held it up.
Since I wasn't wearing my glasses, my red eyes looked unusually wide, glossy, and vulnerable in the lens. I adjusted the frame, aggressively cropping the photo so it only showed from my chest up—capturing my bare, flushed shoulders, the smooth line of my collarbone, and the dripping towel clutched tightly over my breasts.
Click.
I sent the photo into the shared chat group before my brain could logically process the consequences.
[Kurogane Mei]: [Attachment: 1 Image] THERE. Proof! My hair is wet, my face is red because my apartment has no central AC, and I am officially alive. Please leave my cellular tower alone!
The group chat went dead silent for a full sixty seconds.
The three little dots indicating typing would appear, then vanish, then reappear.
Finally, the alerts exploded.
[Kazari Shiori]: Oh... My... God. Kurogane-san Your shoulders... you look so incredibly delicious and vulnerable without your glasses. Look at those damp collarbones. I am saving this to my private cloud immediately.
[Shizuku Fuyumi]: Your skin is completely flushed. And your towel is clutched far too loosely. This is... highly undisciplined, Kurogane. Turn on your heater immediately. (And send one more without the towel blocking the view).
[Kazari Shiori]: Fuyumi!!! You bold silver fox! But yes, please comply with the archery captain's orders. For safety reasons.
Safety reasons?!
I threw the phone face-down onto my futon, wrapping myself entirely in my blankets as my body burned with a blush so intense I felt like a human radiator.