Eren looked at Mikasa in his lap and closed the distance to her face. Their faces were just inches apart. Bit by bit, even that remaining distance started to close, but in the midst of this intimacy, the Mikasa who was standing just beside them, her hands started to separate even more.
She wasn't even pretending anymore; her fingers had been just for show from the start, but now they were so far apart that she should have just removed them from her face entirely.
Just as their lips were about to touch, the world spun. The vast, blurry sky suddenly had a ceiling, and the ground full of grass was replaced by a sticky, fleshy heat.
Mikasa, who had been laying on Eren's lap, was somehow standing now. Their heads were still closing the distance without stopping. They kissed, but this was different—it was Mikasa, not Eren, who initiated it. Her both hands closed on Eren's cheeks; she held Eren's severed head, kissing it. Tears streamed from her eyes, but like a fleeting moment, the kiss ended just as it had started.
The original Mikasa, who had been completely shy just a moment ago, stood there frozen. Her lips were parted and her eyes widened. She couldn't even believe what had just happened. Just a second ago, she was standing in the beautiful shade; now, she was inside the mouth of a Titan, watching her other self hold and kiss Eren's decapitated head.
This was nothing but hell. What kind of sick prank is this? Who is doing this? She didn't know, and she has no means of finding out. Placing her among thorns right after showing her flowers—who was doing this to her, and why?
Humans invented language to share information, but language developed into something so special which can also express the emotions they are feeling. But for Mikasa, no word can express her emotions right now.
And for the answer to her question, who is doing this?, she is standing right in front of her, although she can't see the blonde girl in white clothes. Ymir, with eyes colder and emptier than a frozen well, is gazing at Mikasa with her dull gaze.
The tears falling give her the answer she has been looking for for eons. Her silhouette started to become ethereal and dissipated into the air. No one noticed her departure, just as no one noticed her standing there.
Just as she left, the mirage of that reality started to scatter.
Mikasa woke up on the back of the Jaw Titan. Armin was in front, looking at her with a gaze full of worry.
"Did he say something to you too?" Armin asked, his eyes still tearing.
But Mikasa didn't understand what he was saying. Looking at her look of not understanding what he was asking, Armin rephrased it: "Did you also remember the visions?"
This time, Mikasa understood what he was talking about and she nodded, confirming.
Armin thought Eren didn't talk to Mikasa; there was not a single thing Eren had revealed about this in his returned memories. But when he looked at the tear-filled face of Mikasa, her shaking shoulders, and her downed head, he guessed maybe they had some conversation.
Just then, they heard a sound like something crashing—the sound was like a boulder had spilled from a mountain. When they looked down, on a far boulder, they saw a spider-web-like crack on that rock. In the middle of it sat embedded the Armored Titan. His armor was broken beyond repair; a massive hole was visible on his chest, and blood created a puddle at the base of the rock. No smoke, which appears when a Titan is healing, was coming from the Armored Titan's body.
But soon, they shifted their focus from him. The sound of crackling became very clear in the silence of this vast field. Eren had extended his hand. When the glowing centipede touched it, sparks flew, creating the crackling sound they had just heard.
When I saw myself holding Eren's head, it was like someone was opening and looking into my heart with a dull blade, cutting slowly, fiber by fiber. That scene was so similar to before, when I was in the elf Titan's mouth and my blade was about to come down on Eren's neck. What I was about to do... I was just an inch away from killing Eren. That dream maybe was the future that my choices would have created for me.
But I don't want that future. A future where there's no Eren—what's the point of that future? Even if I saved the world, what about Eren? Who saves him? I... I can't even imagine that future in my thoughts. How can I live in that future?
Mikasa—maybe a butterfly had flapped its wings, or the act of Eren sparing her again and again, combined with the accumulated guilt and sorrow of this, had changed her mind. Even if the world will become the enemy, even if it is only for a few years and I have to go to hell to share his sins, it doesn't matter. That's the thoughts running in her mind in that movement.
By now, she also understood the reason behind Eren's actions. He, from the start, never wanted to kill them; he wanted to give them a future where they could be free. So he started that from himself—he gave them the choice of being with him or not.
And when Reiner said that if it were him in Eren's place with millions of lives on his hands, he would want someone to take this power or kill him, they believed him. But they didn't think that Eren is not Reiner. He gave them the freedom to choose because he was doing all that for their freedom from the start, so if he restrict their freedom, there is no point to the Rumbling at all. But they didn't think of that.
The sole reason that Eren wanted to die was not just because he killed many people, but the act of his friends becoming his enemies, even wanting to kill him to stop the Rumbling at all costs. He wasn't left with a reason to live. Even if he fought back with all his power and won and continued the Rumbling, then what? In the end, he would be alone. His friends—Mikasa, Armin—they all left him. If he lives, then for whom?
Now, Mikasa choosing him over the world is something that would have given a reason for Eren to fight, to live. But now it's too late; he is gone. Changing choices after a certain point does not change the outcome. From the moment Eren's friends decided to become his enemies, he signed his name on his death certificate. Now, her choosing him is of no use, but she doesn't know this.
The Jaw Titan flew toward Eren.
"Now!" she shouted, her voice full of urgency. I have to tell him. He can stop now. There's no need to continue this.
"E... R... E... N!"
I shouted. I want him to know that he is not just family—that I love him. Even if there are only a few years left, they are more than enough for me. I won't regret it. Just come with me; we can have a small family somewhere unknown.
But Eren ignored her shout; he didn't even look at her. The glowing centipede crawled onto his back. She understood this was the last chance there was for her to tell him that there is someone who wants him to live, that he doesn't have to die. Once Eren transformed into the Founding Titan, she would never be able to see him again; he would disappear from their eyes as if he were never there.
But in reality, Eren isn't thinking anything about dying or disappearing. He just wants to take back the Titans' power so they can't bother him again, and so these powers don't get into the wrong hands ether.
The Jaw Titan was still far above Eren. I can't wait anymore.
Mikasa jumped from the Titan's back. Her ODM gear cable cut through the sky as it embedded into the Titan's massive body.
But she wasn't alone in jumping from the Jaw Titan. Armin, who had also recovered some energy, jumped with her. He didn't know what Mikasa wanted to do, but maybe she had some plan, so he followed her.
I looked at Mikasa and Armin coming toward me. Well, if I wanted to, I could just crush them in the air, but there is no need for this. I can feel it is just a matter of seconds before the glowing centipede will merge with me, and that will create an explosion large enough to nuke them up.
Just as they landed on my shoulder.
BOOM!!!
continue—