"Sensei!" Ino stood up to greet him.
This was the mistake.
Ino was sitting on the aisle seat. The floor of a BBQ restaurant is naturally a bit greasy. As she stood up, the towel she was wrapped in got snagged on the edge of the wooden booth.
She felt the towel pull. Instinctively, she let go of the table to grab the towel so she wouldn't flash the entire restaurant.
Loss of balance ensued.
"Whoa!" Ino cried.
Simultaneously, a waiter was rushing past carrying a pitcher of ice water. Ino bumped into the waiter. The waiter stumbled.
Asuma, seeing his student falling and a waiter about to crash, rushed forward like the Jonin he was.
"I got you!" Asuma said, reaching out.
But the System was the director of this scene, and it hated simple catches.
Ino slipped on the greasy floor. She fell forward, arms flailing.
Asuma caught her, but because of the momentum, he fell backward into the empty booth behind him.
They landed with a crash. Asuma was lying on the bench seat. Ino landed face-down in his lap.
But here is the kicker: The waiter, trying to regain balance, swung the pitcher of ice water. The water flew out in a perfect arc.
It splashed directly onto Asuma’s crotch area, where Ino’s face was currently buried.
"Gah! Cold!" Asuma yelled.
Ino, panicked and blinded by the towel that had now fallen over her head, tried to push herself up. Her hands scrambled for purchase. She grabbed Asuma’s belt.
From the doorway, Kurenai Yuhi froze.
Her beautiful red eyes widened. What she saw was her boyfriend (unofficially) lying in a booth with his female student buried in his lap, soaking wet, frantically grabbing at his belt while he yelled about sensations in his lower regions.
"Netorare Situation Detected!" The System announced, practically vibrating with excitement. "The 'Forbidden Teacher-Student Scandal' Event. Bonus points for Kurenai witnessing it! Shy Points Gained: Two Thousand Five Hundred."
("Two thousand five hundred!") I choked on my water. ("That is massive! But Asuma is going to die!")
"Asuma?" Kurenai’s voice was icy cold. The temperature in the restaurant seemed to drop ten degrees.
Asuma’s eyes bulged. He looked at Kurenai, then down at Ino who was still struggling in his lap.
"Kurenai! It is not what it looks like!" Asuma shouted, his voice cracking. "It’s the water! She slipped! The towel!"
Ino finally pulled the towel off her head and looked up. She was inches away from Asuma’s face. "Sensei? Why are you wet?"
"Get off me!" Asuma gently but firmly pushed her away, scrambling to stand up. He looked like a deer caught in headlights.
Kurenai crossed her arms. "I leave you alone for five minutes to check on your team, and you are... wrestling with Ino?"
"I tripped!" Ino defended herself, her face turning scarlet as she realized the position she had been in. "The floor is greasy!"
"It is true!" I shouted, standing up to defend them (and secure my points). "It was a chain reaction of physics! I saw the whole thing! It was purely accidental!"
Kurenai sighed, rubbing her temples. "You and your team are always causing a scene, Asuma." But her eyes softened slightly. She knew Asuma wasn't that kind of guy, but the visual was damaging.
"Let's just... sit down," Asuma said, wiping his pants with napkins. "I need a smoke."
"No smoking in here," the waiter said nervously.
We rearranged the seating. Asuma and Kurenai sat at the table next to us. Ino sat back down next to me, utterly mortified.
"I want to disappear," Ino whispered, pulling the towel over her head again like a monk’s hood. "First the water jutsu, now this. Why is today cursed?"
"It is not cursed," I whispered back. "It is just... lively."
"Naruto-kun," Hinata whispered from my other side. She was looking at the grill with intense concentration. "Is it my turn now?"
("What? Does she think this is a turn-based game?")
"No, Hinata," I said quickly. "You just eat. No moving."
"Okay." She reached for a piece of meat with her chopsticks.
At the exact same moment, Shikamaru reached for the same piece of meat.
"Warning," the System said. "Minor Collision Event."
Their chopsticks touched. A spark of static electricity—caused by the dry air and the polyester carpet—zapped them both.
"Ouch!" Hinata jumped.
Her hand jerked back. She knocked over the bottle of spicy dipping sauce.
The bottle spun on the table, spraying sauce like a lawn sprinkler.
It sprayed a line of dark brown sauce directly across Shikamaru’s face, then continued to spray across Choji’s shirt, and finally ended by spraying a line down the front of my orange jacket.
Shikamaru sat there, sauce dripping from his nose. "I hate BBQ."
Hinata looked horrified. She grabbed a napkin and instinctively reached out to wipe Shikamaru’s face.
"I am sorry, Shikamaru-kun!"
She leaned across the table. But the table was wide. She had to stretch.
As she stretched, her chest pressed against the table edge, pushing her assets up. From Choji’s perspective, and more importantly, from the perspective of the entire restaurant, it looked like she was offering herself to Shikamaru on a platter while wiping his face intimately.
"Netorare Situation Detected!" The System added. "The 'Devoted Service' Event. Low Impact, but high frequency. Shy Points Gained: Four Hundred."
"I can clean my own face, Hinata," Shikamaru said, leaning back to escape the awkwardness.
"Right. Sorry." Hinata sat back down, looking defeated.
I checked my total balance.
Previous Balance: 1,300. Asuma Event: +2,500. Sauce Event: +400. Total Shy Points: 4,200.
I grinned. This dinner was a disaster for social norms, but a goldmine for my power.
("System, open the Shop. I want the Multi-Shadow Clone Jutsu.")
"The 'Multi-Shadow Clone Jutsu' (A-Rank Forbidden Technique) Memory and Chakra Expansion costs 3,000 Points," the System stated. "This will allow you to create up to one thousand clones, depending on chakra. It also includes the 'Mass Experience Transfer' passive, allowing you to learn faster."
.....
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