"We are busy, Anko-sensei," Sasuke said coldly. "We need to find an Earth Scroll. We don't have time for games."
"Oh, scary Uchiha," Anko teased. She turned her attention to me. "But this one... he smells interesting. Like fox and... something else."
She lunged at me. It wasn't a killing blow, but it was fast. A test.
"Hidden Shadow Snake Hands!" Anko shouted.
Snakes erupted from her sleeve, hissing and snapping toward me.
I didn't panic. I had the Adamantine Chain seal. But using it on a proctor might reveal too much. Instead, I relied on my enhanced vitality and the water walking skill I had mastered to slide backward on the damp moss.
"Too slow!" Anko grinned.
She stepped forward to close the gap.
However, the forest floor was treacherous. A massive tree root, slick with morning dew and slime, lay directly in her path.
"Warning," the System narrated. "Terrain Trap Activated. The 'Slippery Root'."
Anko’s boot hit the root. Friction vanished instantly.
"Whoa!" Anko yelped.
Her snakes, which were extended toward me, suddenly jerked back as she lost her balance. The sudden recoil caused the snakes to knot together in mid-air—a biological impossibility that only the System could engineer.
Anko fell forward.
I was standing directly in front of her. My instinct was to dodge, but my "hero" programming (and the potential for points) made me catch her.
I opened my arms. "I got you!"
It was a mistake.
Anko was heavy, not because of fat, but because of pure muscle and the momentum of her fall. She slammed into me.
We both went down.
Behind me was a steep, muddy incline leading down to a small, stagnant pool of water.
We tumbled down the hill.
"Let go of me, kid!" Anko shouted, though she was clinging to my jacket.
"You let go!" I yelled back.
We rolled through thorn bushes and mud, finally splashing into the shallow pool at the bottom.
Splash!
The water was muddy and thick. I landed on my back, half-submerged in the muck. Anko landed directly on top of me.
But the System demanded art.
Anko’s trench coat had become waterlogged instantly, weighing her down. Her mesh shirt was soaked, clinging to her skin like a second layer. Her legs were straddling my waist, pinning me to the muddy bottom. Her hands were pressed into the mud on either side of my head.
And, because the snakes from her jutsu were still confused and knotted, they were currently wrapped around both of us, binding her wrists to my shoulders in a makeshift handcuff scenario.
Anko lifted her head, shaking mud out of her violet hair. She looked down at me. Her face was inches from mine. She was panting from the exertion and the surprise.
From the top of the hill, Sasuke and Sakura peered down.
"Naruto!" Sakura screamed. "What are you doing to the proctor?!"
"Netorare Situation Detected!" The System announced, practically vibrating. "The 'Mud-Wrestling Instructor' Event. Authority Figure Bondage Bonus! Wet Clothing Bonus! Shy Points Gained: Three Thousand."
("Three thousand points! I am rich again!")
Anko blinked, staring at me. Her usual sadistic grin was gone, replaced by a flush of embarrassment that cut through her tough exterior.
"You..." Anko growled low in her throat. "You have really good balance, kid."
"It was the root," I gasped, trying not to focus on how soft she was despite the mesh armor. "And the snakes. They tied us up."
Anko looked at her snakes. "You useless reptiles! Untie us!"
The snakes hissed apologetically and dissolved into smoke.
Anko scrambled off me, splashing water everywhere. She stood up, looking like a swamp monster, albeit a very attractive one. She tried to wring out her coat, but it was hopeless.
"This is going to take hours to dry," Anko complained, her face red. She glared at me. "If you tell anyone that Anko Mitarashi fell into a mud pit with a Genin, I will feed you to the bears. Understand?"
"Understood!" I said, saluting from my position in the mud. "Secret safe with me!"
"Hmph." Anko tried to regain her composure. "Consider this passing the spot check. You survive falling down a hill. Good durability."
She leaped up the trees, disappearing into the canopy as fast as she could to hide her shame.
"System Notification," the voice added. "Anko Mitarashi Interest Level: Curious/Embarrassed. She is now a 'Recurring Target'. Rito Effect probability increased in her presence."
I climbed out of the mud pit and walked up the hill. I was caked in dirt, but the Vitality Unseal was already working, keeping my energy levels high despite the cold mud.
Sasuke looked at me with a mix of disgust and awe.
"You fall down a hill and land in a hug with the proctor," Sasuke shook his head. "You are the most unpredictable ninja I have ever met."
"It is a gift," I said, shaking off the mud. "Now, let's get that scroll."
We continued deeper into the forest. The air grew colder. The silence became oppressive.
About an hour later, we entered a clearing dominated by massive bamboo stalks.
"Hold up," Sasuke signaled.
A figure stepped out from behind a bamboo stalk. It was the Grass Ninja from the gate. The one with the long tongue.
He was wearing a wide brimmed straw hat that hid his eyes, but his smile was visible—and terrifying.
"My, my," the ninja hissed, his voice like sandpaper sliding over bone. "I have been waiting for you, Sasuke-kun."
"Who are you?" Sasuke demanded, pulling out a kunai.
"Just a humble examinee," the ninja said. He reached into his pouch and pulled out an Earth Scroll. "I heard you need one of these. How about a trade? The scroll... for your life."
He swallowed the scroll. Literally. He unhinged his jaw and swallowed the entire scroll whole.
Sakura gagged. "That is disgusting!"
"Naruto," Sasuke said, his voice trembling slightly. "Run. This guy... he is on a different level. This is not a Genin."
.....
...