“There’s no way I can take that kind of role!”
Baek Kiryang, who had rebelled against me in the loudest voice since the program began, covered his mouth with his hand, apparently regretting his own outburst. He couldn’t hold my gaze for more than two seconds, constantly rolling his eyes, unable to find a place to look.
He seemed to think I was going to kill him just for yelling at me once.
I rested my chin on my hand and silently watched Baek Kiryang. Then, Baek Kiryang looked at me with increasing terror. If meeting my gaze scared him, he could just look away, but he stubbornly squinted his eyes and studied my expression.
‘How should I deal with this pathetic weakling?’
After that process was repeated about 10 times, Baek Kiryang’s face turned almost ashen.
In my defense, I didn’t do anything. I just stared at him.
“If this continues, something bad will happen.”
“I never thought the first brave soul to refuse Seungbeom-hyung’s orders would be that hyung….”
I could hear the members, who were watching the situation, muttering. I wasn’t that angry, but it felt like everyone around me was making a bigger fuss than necessary
“What did I do….” Baek Kiryang clutched his head as he listened to them, slowly realizing what he had done.
He looked so fragile that I was afraid he would break if I touched him wrong. Seeing that, the rest of the members could not stand it anymore and intervened.
“Hyung, perhaps it’s best if you just forgive him.”
“Getting emotional like that is something anyone can do. So, please just forgive and let him go.”
“That’s right. Even if it was me, I would have been a little intimidated by the role too. But if you had given it to Kiryang-hyung, he would have been so scared.”
Lee Hwayoung was an exception because he had been focused solely on the lyrics and didn’t show any interest in Baek Kiryang.
I shifted my gaze from Baek Kiryang to look straight at the members’ faces.
“I haven’t said a word yet.”
“Yes…..”
“Yes…..”
With that, the rest of the group returned to their seats. I opened my mouth only after the members stepped back.
“Hyung, say it yourself. How long are you going to just wait for the members to speak on your behalf?”
“…….”
A silence flowed as if someone was about to die. Baek Kiryang’s face had always been pale, but as he lost even more color, he now almost looked like a sick person.
“You can’t answer?”
“I’m sorry……”
When I asked again, Baek Kiryang bowed his head and apologized.
It seemed like he thought he could escape the current uncomfortable situation if he apologized. However, a mere apology was not what I wanted. I shook my head firmly at Baek Kiryang’s attempt to avoid the issue.
‘It’s about time to slowly fix that habit.’
I absolutely must settle a score with this weakling today.
“No. Not an apology. I don’t need an apology. What’s the point of that? Tell me exactly why you dislike it. If there’s a valid reason, then it’s something that needs to be fixed.”
“…….”
“Tell me.”
Noticing that I would no longer tolerate his behavior, Baek Kiryang lowered his head deeply and spoke in a heavy voice.
“Because that role … is a pair with Nicholas.”
“Because you feel burdened to be paired with Lee Hwayoung?”
His answer was unexpected. I just thought he was acting like that because he was burdened by taking on an important role.
“Does that mean it’s okay if it’s someone other than Lee Hwayoung?”
When I asked again with a puzzled expression, Baek Kiryang nodded with a pale face as if he was about to faint at any moment. Then, while glancing at Lee Hwayoung, he began to speak.
“I can never even come close to Nicholas’s level … our talents, are completely different … Nicholas exudes class even when he’s just standing there, but I will just come across as cheap, tacky in comparison. If I took on that role, people would undoubtedly compare me to him, and it would make it hard for them to focus on the performance. Then, the performance would be ruined because of me…..”
Hearing that answer, the members all panicked and began to comfort Baek Kiryang. They seemed to be very alarmed by the string of negative words that came out of his mouth.
“No, what are you saying? Hyung, why are you so unconfident?”
“Who told you to think so negatively!”
“Hyung, you are precious. You deserve to be loved.”
I set aside the members who were comforting him and asked a different question.
“Then, if you were given the role as a pair with me instead of Lee Hwayoung, would you have just accepted it?”
“Yeah……”
I pondered Baek Kiryang’s answer, my chin resting in my hand.
‘Since he said that he’s okay with me, it’s not simply because he’s scared. He’s not scared because of the difference in popularity either.’
Digging into Baek Kiryang’s tunnel wasn’t something that I had tried just in a day or two. He had always been timid and had low self-esteem, so it wasn’t all that surprising to see him belittling himself like this.
But I still couldn’t figure out why, out of all people, he was so particularly fixated on Lee Hwayoung.
Lee Hwayoung has stood out since the very beginning of the program, so why is he feeling inferior now?
This was difficult to understand.
And the choice of vocabulary and tone of speech were also odd.
Baek Kiryang wasn’t someone who struggled with stuttering or any particular speech issues. He simply had a habit of trailing off because he lacked confidence. However, every time he uttered certain words, he stammered badly, almost as if he were hiccupping. It was as if saying those words stirred up painful memories.
‘Those aren’t words he usually uses. Something seems off?’
He wasn’t the type to obsess over abstract concepts like talent or class. A guy who happily followed Do Yuda and Zen around wouldn’t care about such things. There were plenty of others who were obsessed with those things and talked about them endlessly.
For example, Frick…..
‘Don’t tell me….’
As soon as I absentmindedly thought of that name, an ominous feeling crept up on me. I quickly searched my memory in response to that strange sensation.
Then, the words Frick had said and the words Baek Kiryang had spoken quickly passed through my mind, as if pages of a book were being flipped.
“Wow, what you’re wearing right now is luxury brand, right? How much is everything you’re wearing combined?”
“Are you going to apologize to the public like that? You have no manners. You’re just not prepared. Just go home.”
“Just like Trainer Frick said, I’m terrible….…”
“Heh.” I was so dumbfounded, I could only manage a bitter laugh.
I could immediately tell where the over-the-top praise for Lee Hwayoung and the provocative language came from.
The words that Baek Kiryang had just uttered were not his own thoughts. They were all things he had heard from Frick. Baek Kiryang mistakenly believed that Frick’s baseless criticisms, made merely to vent his own stress, were all true.
‘This weakling was already pretty timid to begin with, but that bastard made him even worse.’
Frick had relentlessly followed Baek Kiryang around to bully him, because among the S-Class trainees, Baek Kiryang was the only one who could be easily swayed by him.
Woo Kangwon was as big as a door, and I was next to Do Yuda. Lee Danbi consistently responded to nonsense with ‘
Oh, really?
’, and Lee Hwayoung was just Lee Hwayoung.
Among the S-Class trainees, who were never easy to deal with, Baek Kiryang was the only one Frick could target. I could now somewhat make sense of Baek Kiryang’s irritatingly cowardly attitude.
I sighed heavily and opened my mouth, “That’s something you heard from someone else, isn’t it?”
“…….”
Baek Kiryang glanced towards the camera and nodded weakly.
He seemed to mistakenly think that if he made such a small movement, it wouldn’t be caught on camera. What nonsense. The production team was probably already making tale of ‘
The reason why Trainee Baek Kiryang lost confidence…
.’ in their heads, more than ready to milk this to make the viewers cry.
‘Baek Kiryang’s fans are going to have their hearts ripped apart when this footage airs. They already hated Frick.’
However, just showing his struggles wouldn’t be enough for proper screentime. People couldn’t handle directly witnessing ongoing pain in real-time. There always needed to be a narrative of overcoming pain and wounds, and that was exactly the result Baek Kiryang had to achieve in this mission.
‘Maybe even offering some comfort wouldn’t work.’
I quietly looked down at Baek Kiryang, who was so completely demoralized that he couldn’t even raise his eyes from the floor. And then, I calmly asked him. This weakling would get scared if I raised my voice even just a little.
“Hyung, do you sincerely think that you are such a worthless person?”
“…..Yes.”
Baek Kiryang hesitated a bit to the unusually softly asked question, then gave an honest answer. I nodded as if I had expected his answer and began to speak.
“Originally, the easiest thing in the world is to point out flaws, while finding someone’s strengths is harder than it seems. Incompetent advisors love to point out flaws and delude themselves into thinking they’re incapable of giving compliments, when in reality, they simply choose not to.”
“…….”
“Was the person who said that to you a competent advisor, hyung?”
Baek Kiryang shifted his gaze nervously, clearly uncomfortable.
It was an indirect way of saying
no
.
“Then, hyung, try to think of the advisor who seems the most outstanding to you.”
Although there were a few bastards like Frick, this program still featured a lot of qualified trainers and composers. I asked that while recalling people like Jay or Seezy, who had helped with Do Yuda’s vocal training.
Then Baek Kiryang, who had been hesitating, gave me an unexpected answer.
“…You.”
Emh.
I was taken aback for a moment, but I continued speaking without showing any sign of being flustered.
“…Alright, then let’s make that person’s advice your top priority.”
It was rather nice. I vowed to take this opportunity to confine Baek Kiryang in a prison of praise.
I’ll make him forget everything about Frick’s bullshit.
“Hyung, I think you have a natural talent for singing. It’s really rare to find someone who can consistently deliver good vocals without any ups and downs. Your appearance is unique, you’re tall and has good proportions, and you have a certain aura as well. You’re good at memorizing lyrics quickly, so you will be a big help in urgent situations. And because you’re detail-oriented, you can also easily assist other members with their parts.”
As I kept listing his strengths, Baek Kiryang, whose face turned completely red, stammered ‘
Eh, uuh
‘ while blinking like crazy. His expression, which wandered back and forth between being happy and embarrassed, was really unfamiliar.
Don’t be so embarrassed, please.
Because I’m about to get embarrassed too.
“Seungbeom-hyung’s face turned red.”
“Wow, awesome.”
“Why is the atmosphere so ticklish?”
I could hear the other members who had been watching from the sidelines whispering among themselves. I silenced them with a glance and turned my attention back to Baek Kiryang. Then, I flinched.
‘Ugh.’
Baek Kiryang’s face, bright red and flushed, stared straight at me with an intensity that was almost unnerving. I instinctively leaned back, but he just kept coming closer.
“Really? Do you really think so?”
“Umm…..”
‘Why is he suddenly like this? Is this the first time he’s ever heard a compliment?’
After clearing my throat a couple of times, I avoided Baek Kiryang’s intense gaze and continued with what I had to say.
“There are still many things that need improvement, so don’t like it so quickly. Hyung, your biggest problem is your lack of confidence, and you need to work on not being so nervous around me. Don’t be so self-conscious on stage. Every time I see you doing that, hyung, I’m so frustrated because it’s such a waste of your singing talent.”
“….I-I’m so happy. You’re the first person to say something like this to me.”
After the carrot, the whip was next.
But what am I supposed to do if the child just grins even when I whip him?
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Translator’s Corner:
omg I looked up the problem in previous TN, expecting results like my mouse is malfunctioning or something is wrong with the cable or I should replace it quickly etc, BUT ALL THE GOOGLE SEARCH RESULTS FROM TOP TO BOTTOM ARE TALKING ABOUT ILLNESS????????
[force close browser]
AAAA I REALLY LIKE THIS ARC. IT’S SO WHOLESOME. I read this part so many times but I still smiled when I read that “…You” part OMGGG
Why are we already on chapter 90 though