-----Lilu Flauros-----
I rise up from the coffin before they can splash acid on my face to help wake me up or whatever stupid plan Gnarl had in mind as the Minions get to work decking me out in my default Overlord armor. Oh yeah, it's time for some next level Evil...
Then the hunchbacked Minion who I recognize to be Gnarl begins leading the way. "I am Gnarl. Minion Master and devoted Servant of Darkness."
"The haziness will pass and your muscles will become limber again. You have been asleep for a very long time." He then goes on to run me through the Minion summoning tutorial in the Spawning Pit and give me the choice to either follow him to learn about directing Minions in combat, or skipping straight to the slaughter.
Naturally, as I have no prior experience with this world, I decided to follow him out to the training center for the advanced tutorials. Arriving out of a tunnel and into a surprisingly scenic little grove, I see the fucking Jester Minion dancing up on a tree branch while Gnarl's talking again.
"Being Overlord is more than just throwing a few Fireballs and causing chaos!" At which point the Jester hops down from the tree. "Proper Evil, takes skill... and maybe, well, just a bit of mayhem!
The the fucking Jester decides to piss me off with his mere existence by talking. "I think the sleeping beauty's a little rusty."
Gnarl groans in frustration before chipping in. "Our Jester, Sire. I really should have nailed him out for the crows long ago! Teach him to respect his Overlord!"
Oh, I plan to. At least until I kill him. I remember the ending cutscene for the base game and the Raising Hell expansion, I just fucking know that this bastard's one of the Second Overlord's "backups". And I don't plan on being locked in an Infernal Abyss.
But for now, I'll play the tutorial as it's intended. So I raise my axe high, and smack the Jester with peak-Human strength. Technically since I used [World Hopper], I'm here in my True Body which is part-Devil, part-Fallen Angel, part-Human, which means that a full strength blow from me would likely obliterate this little shithead.
"Stop! You're tickling, you're tickling!" Replies the Jester. Enjoy it while it lasts asshole.
"Good, now hit him again. Don't hold back!" Says Gnarl. Sorry, but I need him to actually survive the tutorial Gnarl. I'll kill him afterwards. So I beat on his little punk-ass like a gremlin-shaped pinata a few more times, much to the raucous delight of the nearby Brown's.
"See it's all coming back now. Evil is not something you just forget!" Says Gnarl. No, it isn't. I wonder what Gnarl would think if he heard about what I did to that Trial-world? I doubt any previous Overlords can say that they ruthlessly omnicided an entire planet before.
"Come on you metal lump... you're giving Evil a good name!" Taunts the Jester. I then punt the little shit into the air with a heavy strike.
While he goes cartwheeling through the air getting a x20-backflip combo, Gnarls exclaims. "That's it, now you've got him!"
I wail on him a bit more before he pussies out to the next phase of the tutorial and runs across a fallen pillar onto a raised area of ground that I can't access. I mean, I could jump up there with my raw strength as a Devil, or just fly with my wings, but this is the tutorial.
"Come on Princess. You move like a dead badger, shame you don't smell as good!" Taunts the little prick once again.
"He's out of your reach, Sire, use your Minions to shut his flapping mouth!" Calls out Gnarl. Again, I definitely could, but I'll play along.
"Oi tubs, they should call you the Overlard!" Considering I was an overweight fat-ass prior to DxD, that one kind of irks me. You're suffering will be legendary "father".
Ordering a Brown to go up and smack him in the face, Gnarl responds. "Oh it warms my black hear to see them running about the place... trying to rip each other apart."
Then we go through the sweeping tutorial and watch him run around like a little bitch for a bit until Gnarl finally says. "I think you're ready, Master. Accompany me to the Throne Room. Evil deeds won't do themselves! Feel free to beat him further if you wish!"
Okay, tutorial's over, time to go pro. I place my axe into my inventory while looking away from the Jester so he doesn't see what I'm doing. Then I call up [Mystic Bow] and draw it, time slows to a crawl due to the [Steady Hand II] Perk while my movement is unimpeded thanks to the [Ranger] Perk.
I whip around and crouch with the bow fully drawn while the Jester is distracted by the Minions I sent to beat him up and, once I've locked on, I loose the arrow. It goes in one ear and comes out the other as the Jester's soul, or rather the Soul Fragment of the Second Overlord, is ripped from the Jester's corpse and sucked into a Black Soul Gem I had on standby.
Normally I'd use Azura's Black Star since it was upgraded to have unlimited storage capacity, but considering the one Necromancer managed to nearly subvert it despite being nowhere near the Second Overlord's proficiency at possession... yeah, I'm not taking any fucking chances of him corrupting the Black Star.
So, for each of his Soul Fragments that I'm sure he planted in the Seven Heroes to help corrupt them, I've specially prepared individual Black Soul Gems to trap them in to prevent him from pulling any funny business.
-----The Wizard/Second Overlord-----
While dealing with the lingering will of this damned Wizard that still dares to resist my control, I suddenly feel an excruciating pain in the depths of my Soul.
"GGGAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!" I exclaim as a torrent of magical power comes erupting out of me unbidden. "What in the name of the Gods was that?! I've never felt such pain except... Oh, clever bastard. It seems that good-for-nothing whore of a priestess taught you some tricks after all. I don't know how you knew the Jester had a fragment of my Soul bound to him, but no matter."
It's at that point that the dregs of The Wizard's spirit rear their ugly head and take advantage of my momentary lapse in concentration. "Dammit. Just give in already!"
Stupid little bastard son of mine, causing all kinds of unnecessary problems. It's bad enough that he "killed" me already, but it seems like he suspects I may have survived. He's right, obviously, but that raises a new series of problems. If he decides to try and hunt down and do, whatever he did, to the rest of my Soul Fragments...
-----Lilu Flauros-----
-----The Dark Tower-----
"Um, Master? What was that all about?" Asks Gnarl. It seems he caught the tail end of the action and while he clearly knows that I just did something involving magic, he clearly doesn't know what.
"That Jester annoyed me. Find me a new one."
It's at that point that one particular Minion starts going wild with joy going "pick me! Pick me!"
I look at him and ask for his name. "Name's Quaver, your Dark Majesty! Can I please, please, please be the new Jester?!"
Quaver? Huh, well that makes this easy. "Sure, you're the new Jester. Don't do something stupid like insult me or talk down to me and I won't kill you."
"Yippee!" He exclaims as he rushes down to take the Jester's Hat for himself.
"Oh bother! He's never going to shut up now! He'll be driving us all up the walls with his infernal singing!" Groans Gnarl.
"In other words, he's a source of perpetual suffering? Sounds like he's doing his job properly then as a loyal servant of the supreme Evil." I respond, much to Gnarl's reluctant acknowledgement. I don't know why he's complaining, Quaver's fucking hilarious in the second game.
With the best Jester Quaver unlocked and the tutorial for basic Minion control finished, it's off to the Throne Room to complete my first mission.
After reaching the Throne Room, Gnarl goes on his little rant about the Seven Heroes basically trashing the Tower and absconding with all of the Tower Objects, most crucially the Tower Heart is missing, which is bad. So, Gnarls sets the Tower Portal to the Heart's last known coordinates and I step on in.
-----Mellow Hills-----
Arriving at the portal entrance/exit connecting The Dark Tower to the Mellow Hills, Gnarl goes on a diatribe about how he hates anything and everything to do with how lush and green and bright everything is. Honestly, I feel the same, and that's not even the Devil part of me speaking. That's a holdover from my Human life. I always preferred Fall and Winter, and my favorite weather condition to be out and about was when it was dark and overcast.
I'm going to enjoy watching the land be enveloped by Darkness as I embrace the path of Evil. Things will become much more pleasant around here. "Sheepie's!" Exclaim the Browns I summoned from the Minion Gate. I order them to begin smiting the shit out of all the sheep they can find.
Meanwhile, I set about collecting the dropped Brown Lifeforce that the sheep produce when they're slain. I note one of the Tower Objects off in the distance across a body of water that I think I need Blue Minions to access. I on the other hand have more sophisticated means of expediting this process.
I conjure a Frost Thrall and order it to freeze over the section of water separating me from the Tower Object and order my Browns to collect it. "Ah! An Object! I like Objects!" Exclaims Gnarl.
Eventually, the Browns get the Pillar back to the Tower Gate and send it back. "Ah, a Minion Command Pillar! You can now command more Minions in the field, Master!" Yeah, I guessed as much.
"By the way, Master? I've never seen such creatures as what you summoned before. What exactly was that?"
"Oh, it's nothing special. Just a little something called 'none of your Gods damned business'."
"Understood, Master. I'll leave your dark and terrible magical secrets to you." Oh good, he can be taught.
After wandering around the Mellow Hills for a while, I finally find the path of progression, by which I mean I find the crucified Farmer who's afraid that the pumpkins are plotting behind his back. He warns me that his farmstead's been overrun by Halfling's, so I send in the troops to flush them out.
As they're ruthlessly slaughtered to the last, Gnarl comments on the fact that the Halfling's are releasing Evil Essence when they're killed, which is weird since they're normally the textbook definition of Lawful Good. Anyways, we run around some more and eventually find the Tower Heart in the middle of a pumpkin patch.
After smashing our way through the pumpkins, thankfully without them turning into Duel Monsters, we reach the Tower Heart and begin transporting it back to the Gate. I knock over a few crumbling stone walls to form shortcuts and other pathways so that we can not only get the Heart back to the Gate, but also progress the main story.
Eventually, we reach the Gate without incident and the Tower Heart is sent through. With that, I return to the Dark Tower.
All in all, a good start to my campaign of Evil.