Pei Chongxi tilted her head back and swallowed two pills before leaving the house.
She had always repented taking medication for schizophrenia and hallucinations, yet she still strictly followed her doctor’s orders today before stepping out.
Standing inside the police station, she watched Yu Shan and An Rong handling the paperwork inside. Because An Rong was already an eighteen-year-old adult, she did not require a legal guardian.
After watching for a while, Pei Chongxi squatted casually at the entrance of the police station to smoke. Taking a deep drag, she exhaled the smoke through her nostrils.
She wore red soled high heels and little to no makeup, yet her breath taking beauty remained undeniable. Her lips lacked color, and her brow was tightly furrowed, as if she had just recalled something utterly absurd.
Was any of this real or fake?
If all of this were merely a hallucination, a police officer should have approached her by now to ask why she was here, yet no one did.
“Hey, don’t squat there smoking! Didn’t you see the sign right next to you?”
A police officer walked up, stood beside Pei Chongxi, and tapped on the no smoking sign.
Pei Chongxi took another drag. She wasn’t even sure if the officer standing before her was another hallucination or a real person. Taking another heavy drag, the cigarettes she smoked were strong enough to make onlookers cough just from catching a whiff, the officer’s voice grew louder.
“Smoking is prohibited here! Don’t pretend you can’t hear me.” The officer’s voice was loud enough to make her ears ring.
Pei Chongxi blinked her dry eyes. Dubiously, she raised her head to look up at the officer warning her.
“What happens if I keep smoking here?” she asked in a gentle, hesitant voice.
Having taken her medicine this morning, her head felt dull, and everything she saw seemed veiled in a thick fog. Yu Shan hadn’t trusted her to drive, so she personally arranged for an assistant to transport Teacher Pei here this morning.
“Picking quarrels and provoking trouble. Five to ten days of administrative detention.”
Pei Chongxi fell silent for a moment. She glanced at the cigarette in her hand, then looked back at the officer, who seemed far too real to be a hallucination.
During those few seconds of hesitation, Yu Shan rushed over like she had seen a ghost, hastily blocking the officer’s view of Pei Chongxi.
“Our teacher didn’t mean to smoke on purpose. I’m so sorry for causing you trouble.” Yu Shan quickly snatched the cigarette from Pei Chongxi’s hand. “Teacher, you can’t smoke here! Didn’t Miss An take all your cigarettes away? Where did you even pull this one out from?”
The moment Yu Shan heard “five to ten days of detention,” she panicked, terrified that eager journalists lurking nearby might capture the moment on camera.
Watching Yu Shan extinguish the cigarette against a trash can before throwing it away, Pei Chongxi pressed her throbbing temples.
“I’m sorry for causing you trouble,” she said softly.
The officer looked between Pei Chongxi and Yu Shan, who was desperately offering apologies. Eventually, he turned and went back inside the station.
Yu Shan let out a long sigh of relief. “Teacher, when the officer spoke to you, why didn’t you respond?!”
Pei Chongxi continued rubbing her aching temples. “I wanted to see if they would actually lock me up.”
“Teacher!” Yu Shan shrieked in a panicked whisper. “You can’t test things like that! What if you ended up with a criminal record?!”
Compared to Yu Shan’s frantic panic, Pei Chongxi remained remarkably calm.
Inside, An Rong was having her photo taken for the paperwork. Noticing Pei Chongxi walking in, she immediately retracted her gaze, standing obediently and quietly in place.
For every step Pei Chongxi took forward, An Rong took a step back toward the side. Every time Pei Chongxi tried to come closer, An Rong dodged further away.
Seeing that Pei Chongxi insisted on walking toward her, An Rong turned around and glared, her eyes carrying a mix of alarm and warning.
An Rong warned her with her eyes. This is a police station. You, a homosexual, better stay away from me.
Pei Chongxi stood not far away with her arms crossed, leaning limply against one of the pillars as if she had no spine. The officers passing by merely glanced at her; seeing that she was no longer smoking, they looked away.
The application process went smoothly. Within ten minutes, An Rong received an ID card that officially belonged to her.
By this time, Pei Chongxi was already standing at the door catching the breeze. Without the stimulation of nicotine, her spirits grew increasingly sluggish, and everything around her seemed draped in a heavy haze.
So, had An Rong really come back to life?
Pei Chongxi couldn’t find an answer.
Standing at the entrance of the police station, she thought about how ineffective the psychiatric medication she took for hallucinations was. Or perhaps she should ask the police inside, if a person had been dead for ten years, yet their appearance and age remained completely unchanged, what kind of case would that fall under?
Realizing she would inevitably be kicked out as a mental patient if she asked, Pei Chongxi let out a soft chuckle at her own thoughts.
If everyone treated An Rong as a real person, then she was real. Pei Chongxi simply chose to stop overthinking it.
An Rong walked up to her cautiously, keeping a wide distance between them, and proudly waved the ID card in her hand toward Pei Chongxi.
“I’m a person with an ID card now. I can go out and get a job. I’ll pay back the money I owe you.”
An Rong blinked. She originally intended to say it with a stern face, but as she spoke, an uncontrollable smile spread across her lips. An eighteen-year-old girl couldn’t hide her thoughts, whenever something good happened, it showed clearly on her face.
Pei Chongxi had a mint candy in her mouth. Biting down on it, she turned her head to check on her assistant and manager, who showed no signs of abnormality. She withdrew her gaze and murmured, “That’s good.”
Saying this, she stepped forward and grabbed An Rong’s wrist with her fingers.
“Ah! What are you doing?!”
An Rong’s expression turned instantly terrified, attracting the attention of the police officer working inside.
“What’s the relationship between you two?”
The officer who had reprimanded Pei Chongxi for smoking stepped forward, pointing at Pei Chongxi’s hand gripping An Rong tightly.
Pei Chongxi said softly, “An Rong and I are classmates.”
Classmates?
Forget about the officer, even Yu Shan, who had been helping orchestrate the whole process, found it hard to believe. Teacher was twenty-eight years old, while this young girl was only eighteen. How could they possibly be classmates?
An Rong blinked. She tried to pull her hand back, but her heart was racing with guilt, under the officer’s scrutiny, a cold sweat broke out across her skin. Although society was open minded now, An Rong’s mindset was still stuck in that isolated town from ten years ago.
“She and I really are classmates. High school classmates,” An Rong explained frantically.
Seeing that An Rong wasn’t struggling further and that they clearly knew each other, the officer issued a couple of warnings. “Don’t pull and push in public!” before walking away.
An Rong breathed a sigh of relief.
Compared to her anxiety and panic, Pei Chongxi remained completely composed throughout the entire ordeal.
As they walked out of the police station, An Rong suddenly caught a whiff of the scent on Pei Chongxi. Like an agile cat, she leaned in, sniffing near Pei Chongxi’s neck, wrist, cuffs, and collar over and over again.
The girl’s breath brushed past the skin of Pei Chongxi’s neck and inner wrist.
This girl with double pigtails, who had just been bouncing around, now looked completely vigilant. “Did you smoke again?!”
A sudden gust of wind blew past, tickling Pei Chongxi’s throat and triggering a fit of coughing.
“Cough, cough, cough…”
After dry coughing, a sickly, pale flush flushed across Pei Chongxi’s bloodless face.
“You’re coughing and you still dare to smoke? Do you want to die?!” An Rong’s eyes widened. For a moment, she completely forgot about her fears of whether homosexuals would be locked up by the police.
Pei Chongxi, who had looked frail in the cold wind, now coughed even more violently. Her body bent forward slightly, coughing so hard it seemed as though her internal organs would come spilling out.
Yet, a trace of a smile flashed across the woman’s jet black eyes, lacking any real fragility or pitifulness of a sick person. When she raised her eyes again, her face returned to that sickly, listless state.
“Didn’t I confiscate all your cigarettes? Where did you find another one?!”
An Rong smelled the pungent scent of tobacco on Pei Chongxi. Without another word, she slapped her hand onto Pei Chongxi’s back, gently patting it to soothe her breathing.
The two stood extremely close, as if instantly transported back to the high school infirmary. Back then, Pei Chongxi refused to lie down, insisting on leaning half her body against An Rong’s shoulder. Both wore blue and white school uniforms that carried the subtle scent of bar soap. They were poor back then, unable to afford fragrant laundry detergent, relying instead on cheap coarse soap to wash their clothes.
Now, things were different. Pei Chongxi’s high-end trench coat drifted with the fragrance of luxury perfume. Living with her for so long, An Rong’s clothes had also absorbed the same pleasant scent, resembling a freshly cut, succulent orange brimming with juice.
Pei Chongxi was coughing so hard she could barely catch her breath, leaning her entire weight weakly against An Rong.
An Rong couldn’t bring herself to ignore her. She glanced nervously back at the police station, then looked down at the frail Pei Chongxi coughing in her arms. Throwing caution to the wind, she pulled her even tighter into her embrace.
“Sigh, look at you. You know your body is weak, so why do you keep messing with cigarettes and alcohol? Smoking isn’t enough for you, you even have so many cigars in the cabinet. I saw those cigar humidors and couldn’t bear to throw them out together… You’re really asking for trouble,” An Rong grumbled while continuously rubbing Pei Chongxi’s back to ease her breath. “Should we go to the hospital? Is there something wrong with your lungs, or do you have bronchitis?”
An Rong rambled on endlessly.
Pei Chongxi’s breathing was ragged, and a feverish flush painted her cheeks from coughing. Her eyes glistened with tears.
The scene was as breathtakingly beautiful as a siren emerging from the deep sea. Coupled with a delicate weakness that seemed ready to collapse at the slightest breeze, and her year round preference for formal black and white clothing, she looked strikingly like a widow mourning her lost love, exuding a frail, melancholic beauty.
An Rong was momentarily mesmerized, unable to avert her eyes.
A slight curve tugged at the corner of Pei Chongxi’s pale lips. Choosing not to care whether the An Rong before her was real or fake, she pressed her cold hand against An Rong’s cheek.
“I don’t have much self-control,” Pei Chongxi murmured softly. “I feel so miserable that I can only rely on smoking and drinking.”
Pausing briefly, she added, “Those cigarettes and alcohol aren’t expensive, just the ordinary stuff you can buy at any convenience store. If you dislike them, feel free to burn them or throw them away.”
An Rong was rendered speechless. “That’s still expensive! A cheap pack of cigarettes costs at least ten yuan. That’s ten yuan!”
When she worked at the grilled fish restaurant, handing out flyers outside in the snow for two hours would only net her around ten yuan.
Standing a short distance away, Yu Shan witnessed the scene. Initially anxious when her teacher suddenly started coughing, she had wanted to take her to the hospital immediately. But listening further, something felt off, was that cough even real?
Yu Shan realized the truth and promptly stopped the assistant who was about to start the car.
“Wait here. Teacher and Miss An have something to discuss.”
“Oh, okay,” the assistant replied, confused. “Are we still going to the hospital today?”
“Probably not.”
Familiar with the routine, Yu Shan pulled out her phone to reschedule the day’s appointments and meetings.
An Rong didn’t dare let Pei Chongxi stand out in the cold wind, so she guided her into the enclosed car.
Space in the back seat was limited, forcing An Rong to sit close to Pei Chongxi once again. Pei Chongxi still appeared physically frail and exhausted, slumping her weight onto An Rong.
This brought the two even closer. Eventually, An Rong gave up resisting and leaned against the door, while Pei Chongxi rested her head against An Rong’s shoulder, just like how they used to sleep head to head during high school lunch breaks.
Pei Chongxi’s fingers pressed lightly onto the girl’s leg.
Her eyes carried a heartbreaking fragility, flickering with a desperate plea that even she herself hadn’t realized.
“Do you really have to move out? Do you really have to go work outside? Out there, you’ll be bullied by bosses, run into thugs, and face hardship from others.”
An Rong looked at her, puzzled. “Don’t you face bullying from bosses at your job too? Your boss still assigns you work that forces you to stay up all night.”
“Sister Pei, we live in the human world, so we’re bound to encounter all kinds of bitterness. If there were only joy and no suffering, that would be a privilege reserved for heaven,” An Rong replied naturally, having tasted bitter hardship from a young age. In her eyes, life was inherently full of suffering.
“Look at how rich you are now, Sister Pei, yet you’re still exploited by your boss.”
Pei Chongxi, who didn’t actually have a boss, parted her lips slightly before resting her head back against the crook of An Rong’s neck.
She greedily inhaled the scent blended with An Rong’s body heat. Under the influence of the psychiatric medication, the scene made her body feel so pleasantly sluggish, as if she had returned to those high school afternoon naps.
An Rong pulled a small notebook from her pocket. “You bought me clothes, treated me to meals, bought me coffee… Plus, staying at your place every day, using your bedsheets and quilts…”
An Rong listed item after item, finally coming up with a shockingly large number. “I will pay all this money back to you. Also, I plan to move out. Staying at your place all the time really isn’t convenient.”
Pei Chongxi’s earlier coughing fits and ragged gasps had been fake, but now, her breathing hitched for real. She sat up abruptly, trapping An Rong in the corner between the seat and the car door.
Their noses almost touched.
Thinking Pei Chongxi was going to kiss her, An Rong quickly turned her head aside, only to realize that the other woman was simply staring straight at her.
“You want to move out and live on your own? Why?”
Pei Chongxi’s voice lost its gentleness and subtle coquettishness from moments ago, turning intensely possessive and cold.
“What’s wrong with my house?”
An Rong answered candidly, “There are too many downsides! There aren’t even bus stops near your place, how am I supposed to travel to work? I plan to check out the nearby older residential complexes to see if there are cheap places for rent. I’ve earned a little money cleaning your house lately, so sharing a small room with a roommate should be affordable.”
An Rong offered a dry explanation, yet Pei Chongxi remained pressed closely against her.
Their proximity was intimate. Pei Chongxi’s hand pressed down firmly on An Rong’s leg; were it not for her pants, five faint red finger marks would surely be visible on her fair skin.
“I don’t allow it,” Pei Chongxi rasped softly. “An Rong, I don’t allow you to move out.”
Pei Chongxi had lived in old residential neighborhoods before. When she and An Rong stayed together during high school, they lived in an old complex. Bugs were rare in the winter, but during the summer, cockroaches and mice frequently scurried around. Naturally, both girls were terrified.
Yet, over time, Pei Chongxi had grown accustomed to it. Meanwhile, An Rong constantly babbled that a top student like Sister Pei shouldn’t touch dirty things, voluntarily grabbing a flyswatter to deal with the pests herself.
Once, waking up in the middle of the night to a rustling sound near their ears, they turned on a flashlight only to find a cockroach nibbling on An Rong’s hair.
Pei Chongxi leaned in and pressed her lips against the corner of An Rong’s mouth. “I have money now. Why can’t we live a better life?”
Unable to push her away, An Rong whispered, “You’re the one with money, not me… You were always a great student, Sister Pei, so you deserve to be wealthy. Unlike me, I was destined to accomplish nothing.”