“South… South Korea.”
“Why did you suddenly leave and never contact me again?”
“Because… if I was the one who suggested breaking up first… it would be easier for both of us… and for Ji Xian too…”
“…”
This time, the silent one was Bian Xun.
The scent of tobacco and his breathing drifted repeatedly through the smoke, hanging faintly in the air.
In that world, Yan Mo had been Bian Xun’s fan from the very beginning.
From the days when Bian Xun had just started competing.
From when he was still an unknown nobody.
No matter whether he won or lost, Yan Mo supported him wholeheartedly.
He attended every match.
He liked every social media post the moment it appeared.
Support banners.
Merchandise.
At first nobody knew who Bian Xun was.
The items couldn’t even be given away.
But Yan Mo enthusiastically introduced him to people at events, handing out support lights and hats for free.
A person who wasn’t good at arguing had reddened his face multiple times while debating with antis online through his phone.
All of Bian Xun’s passion belonged to competition.
In everyday life—
His food.
His clothing.
His personality.
Everything was indifferent and calm.
As though competition had drained all his emotions.
Bian Xun appreciated and was grateful for the shy boy who always supported him.
So when Yan Mo confessed, Bian Xun only hesitated briefly before agreeing.
…Not because he loved him.
Because he was grateful.
In truth, many relationships do not begin with love.
Some start because everyone says the two people are suitable together.
Some start because the other person is attractive and makes one look good.
Some start because of matching family backgrounds, stable jobs, or decent conditions.
In reality—
Those are the majority.
“I don’t dislike them. They’re a good person. They’re pursuing me.”
And so—
Things naturally progressed.
But after they got together, Bian Xun, whose feelings had always been as calm as still water, met Ji Xian.
The spirited young mid-laner.
His mechanical skills were dazzling.
He was also a teammate.
Whether in-game coordination or personality—
Ji Xian was simply too compatible with Bian Xun.
People often say:
Why is it that after convincing yourself you don’t care about love and choosing someone suitable, you finally meet the person who truly makes your heart move?
And how innocent is that first “suitable choice”?
Yan Mo noticed Bian Xun’s concern for Ji Xian.
He noticed their chemistry.
He also noticed that Ji Xian wasn’t indifferent toward Bian Xun either.
Ji Xian admired him.
If Yan Mo hadn’t existed—
Perhaps the two of them would already have been together.
They liked each other.
Because of Yan Mo’s presence, Bian Xun never crossed the line.
Ji Xian never confessed.
Fans shipped them daily on social media.
Even teammates joked that Ji Xian was Bian Xun’s little wife.
And Yan Mo—
The official boyfriend caught in the middle—
Seemed like the unnecessary obstacle.
The extra person.
But what truly made Yan Mo decide to break up was a gathering.
It happened after a tournament.
A celebration dinner for Team TKG.
Yan Mo attended as well.
The atmosphere had been strange from the start.
The three of them felt uncomfortable.
The other teammates kept their heads down and ate.
Then, while Yan Mo was placing food onto Bian Xun’s plate, Bian Xun suddenly said to Ji Xian:
“There’s crab roe in that dish. You can’t eat it.”
Both Yan Mo and Ji Xian froze.
At that moment, the support player casually joked out of habit:
“Captain Xun treats his little wife so well!”
“Ohoho~”
“I’m jealous!”
Before the words even finished, the ADC viciously jabbed him with an elbow.
Only then did he suddenly realize what he had said.
Horrified, he looked toward Yan Mo.
The atmosphere became even more awkward.
So awkward that even the smallest sound seemed amplified.
Bian Xun opened his mouth.
Ji Xian looked happy for a moment, then seemed to feel like a third party.
His pride made him lower his face and silently put down his chopsticks.
Should I act generous?
Should I laugh it off?
Yan Mo asked himself.
If I get angry now, they’ll definitely dislike me.
They’ll think I’m petty and can’t take a joke.
But I’m the official boyfriend, aren’t I?
Why do I have to measure my anger?
Why do I have to be understanding and mature?
Shouldn’t I have every right to be upset?
Yan Mo looked at the extremely spicy dish in front of him.
He couldn’t eat spicy food.
Yet that dish had been sitting there from the very beginning.
He sat directly between Bian Xun and Ji Xian.
Bian Xun could notice what Ji Xian planned to eat next.
Yet he couldn’t see that Yan Mo had a dish in front of him he couldn’t swallow at all.
Bian Xun had always been indifferent toward him.
He never argued.
But he never actively tried to understand him either.
Yan Mo had thought that was simply Bian Xun’s personality.
But Bian Xun actively cared about Ji Xian.
Love.
And the absence of love.
The difference was suddenly so clear.
That day, Yan Mo finally put down his chopsticks.
In the oppressive silence, he quietly exploded.
Before Bian Xun could stand and follow him, Yan Mo gently said, in the same warm tone he always used:
“You all keep eating.”
“I’d like some time alone.”
“I’m obviously unwelcome and affecting everyone’s meal.”
“I’ll leave first.”
“That way nobody has to feel uncomfortable.”
I shouldn’t have sounded so sarcastic…
Yan Mo regretted the words the moment they left his mouth.
But more than anything, he wanted to ask:
What exactly did I do wrong?
Just because you’re more compatible, does that mean I should step aside?
Does that automatically make me the annoying obstacle?
But love could not be forced.
Even if he occupied the position of official boyfriend.
Even if he arrived first.
He couldn’t stop Bian Xun from falling for someone else.
That overwhelming helplessness made Yan Mo send a breakup message that very day.
Then he left that world.
Yan Mo glanced at the cigarette dangling from Bian Xun’s lips.
It had burned for a long time without being smoked.
He sighed softly.
After going through several worlds, Yan Mo had been forced to mature considerably.
His decision back then had contained some selfishness.
But he did not regret it.
He was tired of being an outsider in his own relationship.
And tired of Bian Xun never standing up for him.
Never protecting him.
Simply watching from the sidelines.
“It’s all in the past.”
Yan Mo unexpectedly comforted Bian Xun instead.
His pale, delicate face showed the same gentle tolerance as always.
“It wasn’t your fault.”
“Things like love aren’t something anyone can predict.”
“Besides, compared to me, an outsider, Ji Xian understands your passion for esports.”
“He can cooperate with you.”
“He can strive toward the same dream with you.”
“He really was more suitable for you than I was.”
“Even blood types have compatibility issues.”
“I guess…”
The young man smiled helplessly.
“I was just incompatible with you.”
Bian Xun: “…”
Bian Xun didn’t understand.
He had expected Yan Mo to curse him.
To call him a scumbag.
To mock him.
Yet why did this person always compromise with unfairness?
As though he had long grown accustomed to being treated badly.
Why did he continue understanding the people who hurt him?
This had always been Bian Xun’s fault.
No matter how beautifully it was explained—
Wasn’t it simply that he had a boyfriend who loved him, yet couldn’t stop himself from falling for someone else?
Back then, he had ignored Yan Mo.
Never realizing the pressure he carried.
Never realizing the pain of watching everyone support his boyfriend’s ambiguous relationship with another person.
“…Don’t do that.”
“What?”
Yan Mo didn’t understand.
The tall young man extinguished his cigarette.
His pale eyes settled on Yan Mo.
“When you say things like that…”
“Doesn’t it hurt?”
Yan Mo: “…”
“You’re the victim.”
“Aren’t you?”
Yan Mo: “…”
“Stop understanding everyone else.”
“Take care of yourself.”
“Yan Mo.”
“You didn’t do anything wrong.”
Bian Xun pulled out another cigarette and placed it between his lips.
His voice remained calm, carrying the roughness of someone who rarely spoke.
“We’re the ones who wronged you.”
“…………”
After a long silence, Yan Mo lowered his head.
“It’s nothing.”
“I’m used to it.”
Enduring things…
Was the one thing he had always been best at.
“You’ll stay here tonight.”
Bian Xun put down the phone after speaking with the front desk.
“I asked them to send fresh bedding.”
“I’ll sleep on the floor.”
Yan Mo immediately refused.
“No need.”
“I have money.”
“I can get my own room.”
He truly didn’t want any further involvement with an ex.
It wasn’t that he was afraid of Bian Xun.
But the awkwardness of facing an ex-boyfriend was still there.
Bian Xun waited quietly for him to finish.
Then he said:
“Are you sure that man is gone?”
“What if he’s waiting downstairs?”
“What if he knocks on your door tonight?”
“Have you thought about any of that?”