She could neither swallow it nor spit it out.
Lian Qiao’s face turned bright red from the effort. In a moment of distraction, she accidentally swallowed it.
“…”
What did this count as? Had she just shared an indirect kiss with him?
It was too terrifying. Lian Qiao wiped her mouth incessantly with her sleeve. “Why didn’t you say so earlier?”
Lu Wujiu replied indifferently, “Who told you to move so fast?”
Lian Qiao felt like killing him right now, but before she did that, she had to clean herself up.
Just as she was agonizing over whether to find a stream to wash her mouth or simply go get her stomach pumped, Lu Wujiu’s lips curled into a slight smirk. “I remembered wrong. I drank from the other cup. Yours hasn't been touched.”
Lian Qiao: “…”
He was playing her, wasn't he?
Her temper flared instantly. She unsheathed her sword and swung it toward Lu Wujiu. “I’m definitely killing you today!”
Strangely, Lu Wujiu—who usually liked to defeat enemies in three moves—didn't move an inch today. For the first time, Lian Qiao held her sword against Lu Wujiu’s neck.
Lian Qiao was in disbelief. “I actually won? Don't tell me your Spirit Vein test results were fake?”
Then, she heard a heartless, cold sneer.
Lu Wujiu squeezed out a few words: “…It’s just that I can’t use my mana anymore.”
Lian Qiao was overjoyed. “You have no mana?”
Lu Wujiu: “…Shouldn't a normal person ask for the reason when encountering such a thing?”
“That would be someone else.” The corners of Lian Qiao’s mouth quirked up, barely able to contain her glee. “As for you, I’m already being incredibly kind by not setting off firecrackers to celebrate.”
Immediately, she began to calculate rapidly. “I need to announce this news to the whole world. First, I’ll tell your rivals at Qingping Mountain, and those senior and junior sisters you chased away with your attitude… oh, wait, and that junior brother who sent you a love letter.”
She spoke in a mocking tone, “I bet they’d all be very happy to see you in this weak, defenseless state. It wouldn’t be so bad if they came one by one, but if they… all surrounded you at once, oh my, how could you possibly handle that—”
Lian Qiao was about to rush out triumphantly when Lu Wujiu called out to her, “Stop. Are you sure you want to leave?”
Lian Qiao looked back with a beaming smile. “Why, are you scared? That’s easily fixed. Call me 'Great-Aunt' three times, give me three bows, and then shout 'Great-Aunt is number one in the world,' and I’ll spare you. I promise not to tell a soul. How about it?”
The corner of Lu Wujiu’s lip twitched in a cold sneer.
“…Pathetic.”
Her demands were exactly the same as when she was eight years old.
He had thought she might at least be a little less childish by eighteen.
Lian Qiao was furious. “Then don't blame me!”
With that, she turned to leave, but just as she reached the door, her legs suddenly went weak. She had to grab the door bolt for support.
“…Didn't you lose your mana? What did you do to me?”
Lu Wujiu sat down leisurely and began to sip his tea. “Shouldn't you be asking yourself that?”
Lian Qiao gritted her teeth. “What did I do? It’s not like I’d plot against myself!”
Lu Wujiu glanced at her. “But that’s exactly what you did.”
Lian Qiao fell silent. This… well, it did seem like the symptoms of a Gu poison onset.
Could it be that the trigger for this Gu was her distance from Lu Wujiu? Did she have to stay close to him to suppress the onset? But what on earth was this thing?
She blurted out, “I clearly used the 'Number One Itching Gu in the World,' not this ghostly thing!”
Lian Qiao immediately covered her mouth after saying it.
The next moment, Lu Wujiu slowly looked up. “Oh? 'Number One in the World'? I appreciate you going to such trouble.”
Lian Qiao wished she could seal her own mouth. She turned her head and tried to stomp out again, but with every step she took away from him, the flush on her face deepened. It felt as if a pair of small claws were scratching and digging at her heart…
This was absolutely not the Itching Gu. What kind of broken poison was this?!
Seeing that she was about to lose her reason, Lian Qiao decisively turned back, shuffling shyly in small steps until she was beside Lu Wujiu.
Lu Wujiu spoke with a half-smile, “Why are you back? Weren't you going to announce the loss of my mana to the public?”
Lian Qiao: “I pity you, so I decided not to.”
Lu Wujiu looked like he couldn't be bothered to entertain her.
A moment later, Lian Qiao suddenly saw his fingertips flicker, and a flame manifested out of thin air.
Lian Qiao: “…Didn't you say you couldn't use mana?”
Lu Wujiu said, “I can't, but I never said I couldn't use it against everyone. It's only against you.”
Lian Qiao: “…”
Devious, cunning dog of a man! It was a good thing she hadn't acted on impulse, otherwise she would have lost face in public again.
As for why it was "again," Lian Qiao didn't really want to recall.
She secretly tried to use her own mana, and as expected, it didn't work against Lu Wujiu either.
Lian Qiao was bewildered. “What is going on?”
Lu Wujiu said indifferently, “Shouldn't I be asking you? Since things have reached this point, unless your brain is filled with water, you should sit down and think carefully about exactly what Gu you used yesterday.”
Lian Qiao sat down heavily, not being particularly demure about it.
“This lady wants to know more than you do, obviously.”
Of course, as she sat, she quietly scooted her bottom closer to Lu Wujiu to feel less hot. Then she grabbed a book from the table and began to fan herself rapidly.
“Well… yesterday, I went to the Treasure Pavilion and swiped an Itching Gu. Then, while I was hunting a Yaoguai in the small forest, I sent a message for you to come over. But when I opened the Gu container, I found there were two inside. For some reason, one crawled toward you, and the other suddenly turned around and burrowed into my arm. I thought I was doomed and rushed back to get anti-itching medicine. It didn't act up during the day, but when night fell, I… I was worried about you, so I wanted to see how you were doing. I sneaked in, but who knew I'd be caught by you immediately? And after that, you know what happened…”
Lu Wujiu saw through her at once. “You weren't worried about me; you sneaked over to watch the show.”
Lian Qiao wasn't the least bit guilty. “So what? Haven't you been laughing at me for half a month already?”
Lu Wujiu gave a cold laugh. “Unbelievably stupid.”
After a long silence, he rubbed his brow. “You likely… mistakenly took the Love Gu.”
Lian Qiao looked up sharply. “What is that?”
“Legend says it's a Gu that prevents a man and a woman from being apart. Those who are gu-poisoned are forced to be tied together, facing each other day and night; hence, it's called the Love Gu. However, this thing is too unethical and was classified as a Forbidden Gu long ago. It hasn't appeared in the world for hundreds of years. How on earth did you manage to take the wrong one and end up with a Forbidden Gu?”
Lian Qiao instantly bristled. “You suspect I gave it to you on purpose? Keep dreaming! The people begging to marry me could form a line from the top of Wuxiang Zong to the bottom of the mountain. Would I need to use such despicable means to poison you?”
Lu Wujiu said coldly, “You'd better be telling the truth.”
“Of course!” Lian Qiao chanted three times in her head not to argue with him, then calmed herself down. “Then what do we do? We can't really be tied together, can we? If that's the case, I’d rather die!”
Lu Wujiu said, “Find the Divine Physician. He might know.”
Lian Qiao shook her head decisively. “No, Divine Physician Han is a big mouth. If he finds out I took a Forbidden Gu by mistake, he’ll definitely tell my father. My father would surely put me in solitary confinement. The Immortal Sect Competition is in three months; I've prepared for three years, and I can't miss it.”
Lu Wujiu remained unmoved. “Whether you can participate or not, what does that have to do with me?”
What a heartless dog!
Lian Qiao crossed her arms. “Fine, then you go ahead. Since this Love Gu comes in a pair, it must be removed together to work, right? If you go to the Divine Physician, I won't participate in the gu-removal. Since you have no mana, you'll definitely lose even if you step onto the stage. At most, I’ll lose some face, but your title as the number one in the Way of the Sword will be gone!”
Lu Wujiu glanced at her coldly. “We can't find a medicine cultivator, and we can't not remove it. What exactly do you want?”
Lian Qiao hadn't thought of anything either. “…Is there a medicine cultivator as skilled as the Divine Physician but who keeps their mouth shut?”
Lu Wujiu was about to tell her to look in her dreams, but he actually remembered one. “There’s a medicine cultivator in the black market. His medical skills are outstanding—perhaps even better than the Divine Physician's—and he is tight-lipped.”
“He's the one!” Lian Qiao’s eyes lit up. “Wait, how are you so familiar with the black market? Wow, I didn't expect that while you look all dignified on the surface, you actually frequent such places in private?”
Lu Wujiu was expressionless. “Oh, you're right. You’re not leaving? Shall we head back then?”
Lian Qiao decisively shut up.
The two of them sneaked out under the cover of night. When they teleported to the black market, they even wore disguises.
However, that medicine cultivator only cared about money, not people. His first words were: “Fifty thousand spirit stones for a consultation. Pay first, see later.”
“Fifty thousand? Why don't you just go rob someone?” Lian Qiao was shocked.
The medicine cultivator didn't bother to look up; he reached for a bell to call the next person. Lian Qiao immediately pressed it down. “I’ll pay! I’ll pay, alright?”
Then she looked at Lu Wujiu. Lu Wujiu stood with his arms crossed, his face clearly saying 'What are you looking at me for? I wasn't the one who insisted on coming to the black market.'
Fine, she would endure it.
Lian Qiao painfully coughed up fifty thousand spirit stones. Only then did the medicine cultivator finally take her pulse with an air of indifference.
He immediately diagnosed it as the forbidden Love Gu, matching their suspicions.
Sure enough, anyone who could charge such exorbitant fees and still survive in the black market had to have some skill.
Otherwise, they would have been hacked to pieces long ago.
He knew more detailed information. It turned out that the Love Gu’s onset lasted for one hour. During this hour, the two must not be separated by even a step. In severe cases, they not only had to stay together but might also have to kiss, or go even further, to resolve the symptoms. Otherwise, at best their spirit veins would be shattered, and at worst they would die on the spot.
Furthermore, unlike other versions of the Love Gu, the reason this one was forbidden was due to a special symptom—not only was the intensity of the onset variable, but the timing was also unpredictable.
If they were lucky, it would act up every few days. If they were unlucky, it could happen several times in a single day…
Lian Qiao was dumbfounded by what she heard.
So, what if this broken Gu acted up right when she and Lu Wujiu were dueling?
Would they have to kiss while they fought?
Lian Qiao imagined that scene, and her skin crawled with goosebumps. “…Which pervert created this ghostly thing?”
She really wanted to know.
Even the medicine cultivator, who was well-traveled and knowledgeable, clicked his tongue in wonder, becoming interested. “It is said that this was created by a Yaoguai woman who was obsessed with a cultivator. The Yaoguai woman gave him her heart and soul, but the cultivator remained cold and indifferent. So she thought of this wicked scheme, intending to tame the cultivator step by step. Thus, there is another characteristic of this Gu: neither party can use mana against the other during an onset.”
Lian Qiao was silent.
That Yaoguai woman was truly a piece of work.
But she had another question: “Our symptoms seem different from that Yaoguai's. Why do I feel burning hot all over while he remains completely unaffected?”
“Because that cultivator was exceptionally steadfast and possessed high-level Daoist arts. After discovering he was gu-poisoned, he repeatedly tried to force the Gu out—unsuccessfully, of course. Despite that, he still wouldn't yield, even going so far as to feed the Gu with his own flesh. But is this Gu so easily tamed? In the end, it evolved so that when one party suffers an onset, the other remains unaffected, and they take turns. Then, seizing the day it was the Yaoguai woman's turn for an onset, the cold-hearted cultivator ruthlessly pierced her heart with his sword.”
Lian Qiao: …What a drama of love and hate!
“Since the Yaoguai woman died, what happened to the cultivator?”
“She’s a Yaoguai, how could she die so easily? She was saved, but although her life was spared, her heart had died. She was completely disheartened and simply let the cultivator go. Conversely, after experiencing this brush with death, the cultivator realized he wasn't entirely without feelings for the Yaoguai woman. The two of them, strangely enough, slowly ended up together.”
Lian Qiao: ?
What a twist. The story of this Yaoguai woman and the cultivator was certainly convoluted.
However, the medicine cultivator’s next words shocked her even more.
“However, after only a few days of happiness, they still died.”
“…Why?”
“Well, it was because they had bad luck. On their wedding day, that Love Gu acted up ten times in a single day, and each onset lasted an hour, so, ahem…”
“…”
Lian Qiao guessed an unspeakable thought. Could they have… died in that way?
That was too embarrassing!
She decided that if she and Lu Wujiu ever reached that point, she would rather just strangle herself on the spot for the sake of her dignity.
Fortunately, though, tonight’s hour had already passed. She finally didn't have to endure this broken poison anymore.
But soon, she thought of an even more troublesome problem—
Since they were taking turns, next time, although she wouldn't be burning with fire, Lu Wujiu would be. And since she wouldn't be able to use mana against him then, she wouldn't be able to resist. Wouldn't she be like a sheep entering a tiger’s den, at the mercy of his whims?
Thinking of this, Lian Qiao immediately hugged herself tightly, looking at Lu Wujiu with the wariness one would show a rogue.
Lu Wujiu: “…”