Before I came back to now, of the 108 who took part in plain old 'Recycle,' the members chosen by the Star Keepers numbered 9 in all.
The 9 who debuted under the group name 'Cyclone,' decided by vote, had worked like crazy, quite literally, for the 1 year of their contract with MTV.
But as always, a survival group's biggest problem shows up right before that contract ends.
Title : [Exclusive] Cyclone, contracts terminated
Anon1. Nice! Now all that's left is for our Pil to soar!
└ Anon2. @Anon1 > Guess you don't know it hurts more to fall once you've flown?
Anon3. Will my timeline finally get quiet, or even messier
└ Anon1. @Anon2 > You're a Kim Mun-hyeok fan, aren't you?
Whenever an article about 'Cyclone' went up, not only the article comments but every community out there caught fire. Honestly, just thinking of the words contract termination brings it all back as vividly as if I were looking at it right now.
Title: [Cyclone 9, Day 1 of Wishing for Support]
Anon1. sorry but leave my kid out of that
└ Anon2. @Anon1 > ??? who's your kid? don't pour cold water on a post written in good faith;
└ Anon3. @Anon1 > it's so obvious whose fan you are tsk tsk
└ Anon1. @Anon2, @Anon3 > oh yeah, whose fan am I? quit the mind-reading;; and do you all know you're breaking the board rules right now?
└ Anon4. @Anon1 > you broke the rules first lol just apologize to the OP
It's probably the same with any group, but the voices of fans supporting individuals were much louder than those of fans supporting the whole group, and while the fans fought fiercely, Cyclone itself split apart just as fast.
['Cyclone''s Lee Sang-pil debuts solo]
[Plum Ent. announces new group led by 'Cyclone''s Kim Mun-hyeok]
Just like that, the ones who'd been mentioned most began racing each other to announce their next moves, and I got pushed out of the market yet again.
If my skills had been outstanding enough to squeeze into that gap, would the story have been different?
'Here we go again. Anyway, go back a bit further.'
Just as I was about to sink into gloom, Super Strong Dragon, drifting through my memories with me, started grumbling.
A bit further back....... Right. After Cyclone disbanded, there were also people who'd been on Recycle and didn't make the group, but debuted solo before the buzz died down.
[Kim Du-seong, who made his name on 'Recycle.' Now he takes on acting!]
['Recycle' alum Park Min-hwan's emotional ballad]
['Recycle' contestant Yeo Eun-gi heads out solo!]
Acting, dance, rap, singing and so on, each of them debuted in whatever field they were confident in.
And Yeo Eun-gi, whom I'd marked, debuted as a solo rapper, but his results were so dismal that at some point he vanished from the industry. Of everyone on Recycle, the only one who kept the glory to the end was Yu Yeon-su, who debuted as Cyclone's main dancer, I think?
'See? Out of 108, only one made it. You think all 107 ended up like that because they lacked skill and buzz? Well— your skills are still way short, but is there any need to get discouraged by comparing?'
Hm. Come to think of it, the main dancer survived, right? That's strange.
While I was puzzling over what had been so special about Yu Yeon-su, Super Strong Dragon poured out more words than it had in a while. There was some scathing criticism mixed in, but it was about being worried for me, so it wasn't too bad to hear.
True. Besides, with you here, everything's going to be different from before.
'Right. Make sure you remember that. But why do you even remember what the communities said?'
No, think about it. What else is a trainee going to do, when outside of practice his daily routine is staring at his phone until he falls asleep? I just checked the community reactions to note what not to do before and after debut. Debuted idols have their agencies or managers check the communities and pass along the info, but trainees like me have no choice but to check them ourselves.
'Hmm— guess you did work hard, in your own way. Still, don't overdo it this time. If you get caught browsing the communities, all kinds of trouble will break out, you know? Anyway, good luck.'
Having listened to my long, long excuse all the way through, the thing left a short piece of advice and once again vanished without a trace.
Tacking on all that just to say one line, good luck. Are all authors like that?
"Now then, shall we welcome the contestants you Keepers will be keeping?"
But just then, the MC's line coming from beyond the partition sounded off somehow.
Isn't it normal to say something like being chosen, or being cheered on? Where on earth did keeping come from?
"Don't tell me...... they're trying to say that picking us is keeping the idol industry safe?"
Once again, the first to speak up was, of course, Kim Se-jun.
I had to keep my mouth shut so hyung wouldn't scold me, but what he said pierced the very essence of Star Recycle with pinpoint accuracy.
Judging by how well he knows all this, did he get in through some connection with the production?
But Super Strong Dragon gave no answer to the question I'd half asked myself. If he really had a connection, it definitely would've told me, so apparently not.
Just as I was starting to feel awkward for suspecting the guy for nothing, a staff member quickly glanced back and forth between me and Jun-hyeok hyung beside me and raised their voice.
"AP! Get ready!"
"Yep!"
"Yes!"
The time had come to go back up on that dazzling stage.
***
"Just do what you did in rehearsal. All right, go on in!"
While the staff member explained, hyung and I straightened our backs, blinked to put some moisture back into our dried-out eyes, and gave each other a short nod.
Hyung and I had even learned how to walk from an AP model hopeful and practiced it. On top of that, we'd been lucky enough to rehearse, so there was no way we'd make a mistake.
"Hello! AP Entertainment 5th-year trainee Jeong Jun-hyeok."
"And 3rd-year trainee Lee Jae-min!"
Keeping a steady pace, we walked to the middle of the stage, stopped perfectly on the cross of tape, split the self-introduction with perfect timing, and bent at the waist to ninety degrees.
Then, counting one, two, three inside, I raised my head, and someone tossed out a remark.
"AP? Didn't an idol group of theirs just come out?"
"......!"
And in that moment, my body stiffened on its own.
The very first words out of Park Hui-su sunbae-nim, whom I respect most, were a mention of our AP!
'It's not like she mentioned you, so why are you so happy? Anyway, Park Hui-su, huh....... In my day, I think she made more songs for other people than her own.'
True, I couldn't argue if people remembered her more as a composer than as a singer.
Park Hui-su sunbae-nim debuted as main vocal 5 years before Star Recycle came out, on 'My-dol,' Korea's very first idol survival program. But even though the network had spent big money back then, when it didn't take off, the network ignored the rest of the contract period and forcibly disbanded My-dol, you know?
Then she went back to her original agency and worked as a singer-songwriter, but she quit that soon too, and suddenly became better known as a composer. That's the story.
'Aha. So you're after her composing skills? Though it looks like she's here as a vocal trainer.'
Yeah. To be honest, it'd be a lie to say I'm not. Her vocals were rated lower than her composing, but I liked them. Besides, vocals and composing have a lot in common, so I'm sure there's a lot to learn.
'Is that so? Anyway, if you want to get anything, first you've got to catch her eye, so give it your best.'
That's exactly what I plan to do.
While I steeled my gaze at Super Strong Dragon's advice, Choi Su-jin sunbae-nim, here as the dance judge, set down the paper she was holding and raised her head.
"Then shall we see the stage you've prepared?"
"Yes!"
"Yes!"
It wasn't a song made for us, but just knowing I finally got to perform on a stage made my emotions swell.
The audience was five in total, counting the sunbaes and the MC. Unlike shows where the contestants come in first and take their seats, this was my first time seeing a system where the seats fill up in the order of performance.
Having to perform in front of such a small audience, I couldn't help feeling that going up first was both lucky and a shame. But that didn't mean I wasn't going to give it my all.
Once it aired, everyone on the other side of the screen would be the audience anyway!
'That's your problem. You turn into an optimist out of nowhere, I'm telling you? You'd be better off pessimis—'
Shh. It's starting.
'You've memorized it so well you could do it if someone poked you awake, and you're still fussing. So fussy.'
While Super Strong Dragon grumbled, the intro to the AP senior group's debut song began to play, the one I'd been humming even in my sleep for the past 2 weeks, just like it said.
♬ ♪-♩ ♪! ♬ ♪- ♪!♩ ♩ ♩!
Marveling at timing that landed exactly right, I exchanged a quick look with hyung and started to move.
Boom— Boom! Emotion, bursting out!
The Fantasy I've dreamed of every night!
Fantasy!
The song had come out a good 10 years before now, so its feel was a little different from today's. But I'd chosen it because I thought its flow, where the busily chopped beat merged into a strong, pounding thump and then sped up again, had a strong pull that drew people in.
My Love for you
Absolutely Never Stop!
Never Stop!
Trying to add the chorus on top of the intense dancing, I was starting to run out of breath.
Honestly, it was a hard song for someone like me, who falls short on dance, to sing through as well, so it was a choice I'd never have made on my own without hyung's and Team Leader Seol's help.
Still, I've got to smile. If only for the me who worked so hard to get here!
'Hey! You're not the only one who worked hard. I had it way worse, you know?'
Yeah, yeah. You worked hard too, dragging me all the way here.
No, but how can you not hold out for even that little bit and pop out again?