“You’re not human.”
Nezha stepped down from the throne, arms crossed, his icy gaze looking down at Shen Fuxing from above, his entire body radiating a murderous aura.
“Worthy of the Great God of the Three Altars and Seas.” Shen Fuxing lowered her eyes slightly, curling her lips into a mysterious smile. “That’s right, I’m not human.”
“I am a macaque from Siberia. My mission is to conquer the Heavenly Court! Kill King Li! Then snatch his Seven-Treasure Exquisite Pagoda, throw it to the ground, and stomp it to pieces!!”
“…Ha, you?”
Nezha sneered.
He took the Fire-Tipped Spear from her hands, stepped onto his Wind-Fire Wheels, and turned to leave without another word.
Because of his speed, a gleaming golden brick fell out from the Sky-Hiding Silk, landing right at Shen Fuxing’s feet.
With a heavy thud, but the wind rushing past Nezha’s ears was too loud—he didn’t hear it.
Shen Fuxing was a good follower. Seeing that her boss had dropped something, she bent down, picked it up, and without hesitation kept it safe on his behalf.
Before leaving, she grabbed a handful of nuts from the desk.
Becoming the only follower who had successfully stayed by the Third Prince’s side in centuries, Shen Fuxing’s days were undoubtedly good.
Everyone in Cloud Tower Palace who wanted to climb the ranks came to curry favor with her, hoping she’d put in a good word for them before the Third Prince.
Potato chips, fried chicken, crispy shrimp—if Shen Fuxing wanted to eat it, they could bring it back from the Mortal Realm.
Accepting bribes in secret never ends well, especially for a female rogue like Shen Fuxing who wanted the goods but didn’t want to do the work.
Out of a weakling underling’s devotion to her badass boss, Shen Fuxing would always set aside two-thirds of the snacks as tribute to Nezha.
The Third Prince was upright and incorruptible—he could refuse them, but Shen Fuxing couldn’t stop sending them.
For an entire week, every time Nezha returned from vanquishing demons, he’d find all sorts of random snacks on the desk in the Prince’s Hall.
All things mortal children liked—he’d stopped eating them long ago.
Nezha sat before the desk, leaning the Fire-Tipped Spear to one side. The cold expression on his face had been carved there for ten years without change—no emotion, no trace of mortal warmth.
He was about to call someone to take the things away.
But as his gaze swept past, the scene before him overlapped with a memory buried deep in his mind.
Nezha’s eyes paused.
In the old days, he was the havoc-wreaking little tyrant of Chentang Guan. Every time he got into trouble outside and came home to be punished by Li Jing, his mother would gather some malt candy and snacks and have them secretly delivered to his room.
A thousand years passed in the blink of an eye. After the Fengshen Dazhan ended, there was no more Yin Shiniang in the world—only the Bedside Goddess who bowed in great reverence every time she saw him.
The Third Prince seemed lost in thought. The Immortal Attendants in the hall dared not linger and risk offending him, fearing they’d bring misfortune upon themselves, so they all retreated outside.
In the evening, Shen Fuxing went in to deliver official documents. Nezha wasn’t in the hall. The spicy strips on the desk were barely touched, but the candied hawthorn skewer she’d casually placed there was nowhere to be seen.
“Immortal Shen, the Haihui Dashen has gone with King Li to drill the newly enlisted Heavenly Soldiers. He’s not in Cloud Tower Palace. Did you need him for something?”
The speaker was Yan He, the chief steward of Cloud Tower Palace.
Shen Fuxing’s eyes flickered. “Are they the new recruits who came up to the Heavenly Court in the same batch as me?”
“Indeed.” Yan He smiled. “This year’s Immortal Ascension Exam for Mortals had a rather high acceptance rate. Your batch alone numbers a full hundred thousand.”
“Sixty percent went to the Ministry of War. The remaining forty percent, like yourself, were assigned to various palaces as Immortal Attendants.”
Shen Fuxing: “Ascension Exam? Didn’t the Jade Emperor send Taibai Jinxing to the Underworld to—”
Yan He covered her mouth, the corner of his lips curving slightly. “What is the Immortal saying? I don’t quite understand.”
“…”
So that’s how it was.
Yan He released his hand, tucked it into his sleeve, and said with a faint smile: “His Majesty’s rule over the Three Realms is no easy task. Some things must be written into the year-end summary and reported to the Three Pure Ones. Please don’t say such things that would embarrass everyone in the future.”
Shen Fuxing changed the subject. “Where are they drilling?”
“Near the Southern Heavenly Gate.” Yan He turned and set down a stack of documents, then looked back. “You can wait here—”
Shen Fuxing was already gone.
Outside the Southern Heavenly Gate, sixty thousand Heavenly Soldiers stood in formation, their momentum soaring like a rainbow.
Too many people—one glance and the eyes went dizzy, impossible to take them all in.
Shen Fuxing snuck around, skulking and hiding behind a cloud, poking her head out to try and find that familiar face in the crowd.
So absorbed was she that she was caught red-handed without realizing it.
Sensing something wrong, she turned her head—good heavens above, a giant!
His nostrils were bigger than her head!
He came right up in her face, a pair of furious bulging eyes, blue-faced with a bushy beard, fully armored, carrying two Xuanhua battle axes on his back. At first glance, he looked exactly like Zhang Fei.
Shen Fuxing had no time to appreciate his “magnificent beauty.” She turned her head and pinched her nose, thinking to herself—how many years has this big brute gone without brushing his teeth? The breath blasting from his nose stank worse than her boss’s reputation in the East Sea!
Standing this close, it was all blowing right in her face!
No—she was going to puke.
The Giant Spirit God saw the little immortal before him merely glance up at him once, then immediately start retching like the world was ending. His brows shot up on end.
“—Hm!?? What do you mean by that? Am I really that disgusting to look at?”
Shen Fuxing straightened up, struggling to lean against a pillar. “Here, do what I do.”
“Cup your hands over your nose and mouth.”
“Breathe out.”
“Then take a big, deep sniff.”
The Giant Spirit God did as told.
The Giant Spirit God collapsed.
His body was like a mountain, crashing down into sleep, shaking the sea of clouds.
The weather was excellent today, the sun blazing high, and sixty thousand new recruits were drilling in perfect unison under the battle cries of the divine generals—when suddenly, the sunlight overhead was blocked.
Looking up, some bastard was using them as a mattress!
The orderly ranks instantly dissolved into chaos.
No one wanted to be flattened into a meat patty on their first day on the job, so they scattered in every direction, fleeing for their lives.
King Li, clad in his marshal’s robes and holding the Seven-Treasure Exquisite Pagoda in his hand, stood on the reviewing platform, frowning and bellowing, “Don’t panic! Don’t panic!”
In the moment of crisis, no one listened to him.
What had been a solemn and majestic scene had turned into a chaotic, squawking marketplace.
“Who! Who is causing this disturbance!” King Li roared in fury. “Nezha, apprehend the troublemaker at once!”
“Nezha obeys.”
Realizing she had caused trouble, Shen Fuxing crouched low, ready to slip away—when a flash of red appeared before her, standing on the Wind-Fire Wheels.
His expression was cold, utterly devoid of emotion.
Poor Shen Fuxing had no escape route. All she could do was take a step back for every step the Third Prince advanced, small and helpless.
Nezha: “How long have you been in the Heavenly Court?”
Shen Fuxing slowly raised her hand, making a “nine” gesture.
“Nine days and you still get lost. Pathetic.” Nezha crossed his arms, shooting her a disdainful sidelong glance.
Stepping past her, he grabbed the massive Giant Spirit God with one hand, and with a flash of red in the air, hurled him to the front of the reviewing platform.
Leaving Shen Fuxing frozen in place, not having processed what just happened.
The Southern Heavenly Gate had no dust, but it had clouds, and Nezha’s rough toss of the Giant Spirit God had the same effect as a wooden cabin that hadn’t been cleaned in ten years suddenly getting a thorough sweep.
Li Jing on the reviewing platform coughed violently from the dust.
Today was truly infuriating him to death!
He’d deal with Nezha later—first, let him see which reckless god had the audacity to cause trouble on his turf.
“What’s going on with the Giant Spirit God? Who did this?” Li Jing swept his gaze around and bellowed.
The sixty thousand assembled stood silent as chickens, no one answering.
Shen Fuxing tucked her hands into her sleeves, hiding behind Nezha like a quail.
“Scared?” Nezha glanced back at her.
“…I didn’t even touch him.” Shen Fuxing raised her head slightly, whispering her defense with an innocent look.
Nezha remained expressionless, maintaining his half-turned posture.
“Nezha, who are you whispering with?”
From the high platform, Li Jing’s brows knitted tightly as he cast a questioning glare at them.
“A minor immortal, recently assigned to the inner hall as an attendant.”
Nezha had always been a loner. Over the centuries, the personnel department had recommended no fewer than a thousand attendants to him. He never accepted them, but never refused either—he’d toy with them for a bit and toss them out of his palace.
Now, suddenly, there was an exception.
Word had it she was only fifteen or sixteen, of mortal origin, and had gotten lucky when the Heavenly Court faced a manpower shortage, recruited by Taibai Jinxing.
Li Jing had long heard of Shen Fuxing’s name.
“Shouldn’t she be at Cloud Tower Palace? How is she here?” Li Jing demanded.
Under the gaze of the crowd, Nezha said flatly, “The girl is foolish, with no memory to speak of. She got lost and wandered in here by mistake.”
Li Jing narrowed his eyes, shifting his gaze to Shen Fuxing. “She’s the only outsider here. For no reason at all, why would the Giant Spirit God be lying unconscious on the ground?”
“Guards! Seize this immortal attendant for me!”
Nezha stood before Shen Fuxing, the Sky-Hiding Silk fluttering fiercely, his proud and towering back never shifting an inch.
His expression indifferent. “The Heavenly King does her too much credit.”
Though Shen Fuxing was strong, bringing down the Giant Spirit God was a fantasy.
Li Jing held his pagoda aloft, paying him no mind. “Whether she did it or not, one interrogation will reveal the truth!”
In full public view, the Heavenly King ordered the arrest, yet the Third Prince acted as if he hadn’t heard, standing utterly still.
The Heavenly Soldiers dared not approach, and naturally couldn’t get past him to seize Shen Fuxing.
The air seemed to freeze, the tension growing ever more severe.
Li Jing was deeply displeased.
This defiant son of his was becoming more lawless by the day!
Openly defying his father’s orders—if not for his pagoda in hand, wouldn’t the boy be climbing right over his head!
“Your Majesty the Heavenly King, this minor immortal did witness the Giant Spirit God’s collapse. Might I trouble you to step closer?”
In the dead silence, Shen Fuxing stepped out from behind Nezha of her own accord, breaking the tense atmosphere.
She had no choice—Nezha was the only one who could protect her, and the only one willing to. To please him, she had to sacrifice King Li.
Hearing this, Li Jing swept his marshal’s robe and descended the reviewing platform without a hint of caution.
He came to stand beside the Giant Spirit God’s massive head.
Shen Fuxing said nothing, merely pointing at the Giant Spirit God’s slightly open mouth.
Li Jing assumed poison had been placed inside the mouth, so he stepped closer and leaned down to look.
A suffocating stench hit him full in the face, instantly flooding his entire nasal cavity, traveling through his respiratory tract and into his lungs.
Li Jing’s face turned purple, and he couldn’t breathe for a moment.
With his last shred of consciousness, he clutched the Seven-Treasure Exquisite Pagoda to his chest, rolled his eyes back, and fell stiffly to the ground, his “death pose” exactly matching the Giant Spirit God’s.
“Quick! The Heavenly King has been attacked! Seal off the entire area!”