“Here, Da Ya. I snuck this egg out of the kitchen especially for you. Hurry up and eat it. Your dad couldn’t bear to eat it himself. Sigh, the last time I had an egg was last month.”
The man standing before Tang Li wore a brown hemp tunic. He held out an egg to her, his reluctant gaze fixed on it as he swallowed hard, looking as though he desperately wanted to eat it himself.
Tang Li could guarantee that if she said, “Dad, I’m not hungry. You eat it,” her father wouldn’t hesitate or put up even the slightest show of refusal. He would swallow the whole thing in one bite.
That was exactly what he had done yesterday!
There was a little paternal love there, but not much.
Her father would never shortchange himself for anyone. In their household, the only person who ate more eggs than him was Second Uncle, who could actually read and study.
Tang Li raised her face, thinner by a good deal after her illness, and put on an expression of delight mingled with emotion as she accepted the egg. It wasn’t particularly large. One bite took half of it.
The egg had come from a hen raised on vegetable leaves and earthworms, and even without seasoning, it was fresh, savory, and delicious, without the slightest trace of gaminess.
Tang Xun had been waiting for his daughter to refuse it. He stared blankly as she ate with obvious satisfaction, then said somewhat against his better judgment, “Eat more. Take good care of yourself and get your strength back. If you like them, Dad can get you more.”
Tang Li immediately put on an expression of filial admiration.
“Thank you, Dad. I knew you loved me the most. You’re the best! I want two more eggs tonight.”
She knew perfectly well that when her cheap father secretly collected eggs, he had skimmed off quite a few for himself. He had more than ten eggs hidden away, and every now and then he would treat himself to a private snack.
Tang Xun hurriedly said, “We keep track of all the eggs in this household. At most, I dare steal one every few days. If I take too many and your grandma finds out, she’ll skin us alive.”
At that, a trace of indignation crept into his voice.
Every egg his mother collected, aside from the ones she boiled for Second Brother, was saved and taken to market to exchange for money to buy Second Brother’s writing brushes, ink, paper, and inkstones.
So what if he could read?
Fortunately, Tang Xun was clever. He had figured out exactly when each of the hens laid eggs and secretly collected quite a stash for himself. He hid them in the hollow of the old tree in the courtyard, covering them with branches and grass. Whenever he got a craving, he would sneak one out for a little treat.
These past few days, he’d only been willing to take out some of his precious eggs because his daughter had fallen seriously ill and nearly died.
Tang Li blinked. Her clear black-and-white eyes, set in a face no bigger than a palm, made her look especially innocent.
“Dad, don’t worry. I found more than ten eggs in the hollow of the old tree in the courtyard. We can secretly split them among ourselves and eat them.”
She clasped her hands together, her face full of gratitude.
“It must be Heaven taking pity on me because I got sick and specially sending me these eggs. Thank you, Heaven!”
Tang Xun couldn’t smile.
His painstakingly hoarded eggs!
How had his daughter discovered them? He had hidden them so carefully. He had even pulled off a bunch of branches and grass to cover them.
But for the sake of maintaining his image as a loving father, he couldn’t tell her the truth. All he could do was play along.
“Yes. Thank Heaven.”
He consoled himself with the thought that at least the eggs had gone into the mouths of the eldest branch of the family. So it wasn’t a total loss.
Even so, his heart ached.
He forced out a few more insincere words before walking away, swallowing his pain.
Watching his back as he trudged away like a wandering ghost, Tang Li happily poured herself a cup of water.
She had eaten the egg too quickly, and it was sticking in her throat.
【Host, why go to all this trouble fighting your father over a few eggs? Once you bind yourself to this system and complete the assigned missions, you’ll be able to eat dragon liver and phoenix gall every day if you want.】
A voice full of exasperation rang out in Tang Li’s mind.
She rolled her eyes.
【And then I’ll have to wake up before the chickens and go to bed after the dogs? I’m not stupid!】
Half a month earlier, Tang Li had come down with a bad cold and nearly died. In her delirium, she had awakened memories of her previous life in the modern world.
Before she could make proper use of her experience from that life and imitate the heroines from the novels she’d read by starting a business and making money, the Virtuous Empress Development System had appeared.
The system explained that its purpose was to cultivate an empress of unparalleled virtue for the Jing Dynasty, thereby prolonging the fortunes of the Great Jin and collecting energy in the process.
As long as she diligently completed the tasks it assigned, she would earn Achievement Points that could be exchanged for items in the system shop. She could also increase her reputation, eventually becoming famous for her virtue, being selected for the imperial palace, becoming empress, and leaving her name in history for all eternity.
It was a grand and perfectly round cake it had painted for her.
Unfortunately, Tang Li took one look at the course schedule in the system’s backend and rejected it outright.
According to the system’s curriculum, music, chess, calligraphy, and painting were merely the most basic subjects. Astronomy, geography, medicine, embroidery—she had to master all of them.
And she would have to study for more than sixteen hours every day.
Even in her final year of high school, she’d never had it this bad.
Was this even a life fit for a human being?
Whoever wanted to be this virtuous empress could go ahead and be one.
Tang Li wasn’t even remotely tempted.
With the way the system had arranged things, even if she actually became this so-called virtuous empress, she wouldn’t get to relax for a second, let alone enjoy herself.
Meanwhile, the relatives around her would be the ones benefiting from her efforts, rising to prosperity along with her…
She would suffer while everyone else enjoyed the rewards.
Wasn’t that just saying other people’s happiness had to be built on her suffering?
That was double the suffering!
Reject it!
Absolutely reject it!
Tang Li glanced at the countdown in the upper-left corner of the system.
There were still 21 hours, 8 minutes, and 47 seconds.
Once the countdown reached zero, the system would be forced to leave because it had lost its host.
Judging by how desperately it had been trying to persuade her these past few days, it would probably face punishment if it failed to complete its mission.
【Are you really not going to think it over? If you refuse to do the missions and collect reputation, your entire branch of the family will end up homeless and die without even a proper burial.】
The system sounded extremely anxious now. It had even begun volunteering information.
【Your branch of the family is cannon fodder in an imperial-examination novel. Your father is the contrast character, while your second uncle is the male lead.】
Tang Li, who had been looking bored a moment ago, immediately became interested.
【So you’re saying Second Uncle won’t just pass the provincial examination—he’ll eventually rank highly in the imperial exams and become an official?】
Since he was the male lead, his future obviously wouldn’t be limited to some low-ranking official. He might even become a prime minister.
Tang Li’s second uncle, Tang Zheng, was quiet and taciturn. He didn’t talk much, and his relationship with her father was merely so-so.
More precisely, her father was the one who disliked Second Uncle.
But Second Uncle was usually quite good to the two children of their branch. He often brought them little things from the city.
A few days ago, when he’d returned home and learned that the original Tang Li had fallen ill, he’d specifically brought her some sweets so that she could have something sweet in her mouth while taking her medicine.
Because she obediently took her medicine, Second Uncle had even given her a jade pendant.
Tang Li was genuinely curious.
If her own brother was going to become an official, then no matter how useless her cheap father was, surely he wouldn’t starve to death.
So how exactly had their branch ended up in such a miserable state?
She couldn’t figure it out, so she decided not to bother guessing.
Instead, Tang Li decided to freeload off the system’s information.
【Really? I don’t believe you. Unless you send me the original novel and let me see exactly what happens to our branch.】
The system was fighting for its performance rating, too. It immediately transmitted the plot of the original novel to Tang Li.
It was counting on her learning the truth and then agreeing to bind with it so she would diligently complete the missions.
After receiving the entire plot, Tang Li fell silent.
Her father really was something.
He had somehow managed to take a perfectly good hand and completely ruin it.
As far as academic talent went, her cheap father actually had some.
When he was young, the Tang family had even spent money sending him to school. But after attending for only a few days, he found it too tiring and quit.
For years afterward, he did nothing but loaf around at home.
Once the family assets his great-grandfather had left him were tricked away, he turned his attention to the money in Grandma’s hands.
He swindled the money out of her under the pretext of opening a shop. Before long, he’d squandered every last bit of it.
Grandma was literally angered to death.
Their entire branch was then expelled from the family home, their reputation utterly ruined. Even beggars passing by would spit at them.
By contrast, her diligent and studious second uncle not only passed the imperial examinations with flying colors, but even became the youngest person in the entire Great Jing dynasty to achieve the distinction of placing first in all three examinations.
In the end, he caught the eye of a princely household and married a commandery princess.
The family genealogy even gave him an entire page of his own.
He had practically become a legend in their little county.
【Host, you don’t have much time left! If you don’t start working hard, your branch will be expelled from the family in less than half a year.】
【Your father currently still has twenty taels of silver and ten mu of farmland left to him by your great-grandfather. We need to find a way to make him spend that money on you, or his fair-weather friends will trick him out of it. As a newcomer benefit, the host can draw a Newcomer’s Gift Pack. It is guaranteed to contain at least one Dream-Infiltration skill. You can use it on your father and make him believe that you will become the future empress, so he’ll willingly spend money cultivating you.】
【Your father is somewhat insecure when it comes to your second uncle. As long as you can become empress and bring honor to your branch of the family, he’ll surely reform himself and mend his ways.】
The system had everything arranged down to the last detail.
But Tang Li wasn’t buying a single word of the grand cake it was selling.
In her opinion, the person in their branch who most desperately needed to be bound to a system and whipped into shape was her father!
People in this era still cared greatly about a woman’s parents and their conduct, especially the imperial family.
If she wanted to catch the imperial family’s eye, how extraordinary would she have to be before they could overlook her father’s character?
This system was such a burden!
Why couldn’t it be a Perfect Dad Makeover System instead?
Rather than whip herself into shape, Tang Li would much rather whip her parents into shape and be the one who lay back and enjoyed an easy victory from the starting line.
She was only eight years old, after all.
【Can’t you modify yourself into a Perfect Dad System?】
【…No.】
【You can’t even do something this simple. Useless! Absolutely useless!】
The system was wounded by Tang Li’s dismissive tone and hurriedly tried to demonstrate its strengths.
【Our Virtuous Empress Development System is genuinely useful. Even a piece of rotten wood can be carved into a work of art. As long as you complete the courses assigned by the system, you’ll obtain the corresponding skills. For example, after completing ten thousand medical lessons, you can become a miracle-working physician.】
【After completing two thousand lessons on the Four Books and Five Classics, you’ll possess the scholarly learning of a licentiate. Complete twenty thousand lessons, and you’ll become one of the great scholars of your age!】
Tang Li’s tone turned subtly interested.
【So if I complete twenty thousand lessons, passing the provincial examination will be a piece of cake?】
【Forget passing the provincial examination. Becoming the top scholar wouldn’t be a problem either.】
Seeing Tang Li’s attitude begin to soften, the system became even more diligent, introducing the courses in its backend one by one and boasting about each skill as though it were the greatest thing under Heaven.
Tang Li’s eyes lit up.
A system like this would be such a waste on her.
It belonged with her father!
【System, come on. Let’s negotiate.】
【You don’t want to get recalled after failing your mission, do you?】
…
Late that night, Tang Xun quietly climbed out of bed and crept into the courtyard.
He reached his hand into the hollow of the tree.
It was completely empty.
Tang Xun let out a long sigh.
Sure enough, that girl had taken all the eggs.
He wondered where on earth Da Ya had hidden them…
Tang Xun was devastated.
He decided that tomorrow he would go into the county town and buy himself some meat buns to satisfy his craving.
Four big meat buns this time!
As for the others at home, they had eggs to eat. He wouldn’t bring any back for them.
With that thought in mind, he was about to turn around and go back inside when his foot slipped.
He pitched forward and went straight into intimate contact with the ground.
The impact left his vision swimming with stars.
In his dazed state, he seemed to hear an unfamiliar voice.
Something about rising to wealth and glory…
About having a page of his own in the family genealogy…
An image even appeared before his eyes: himself dressed in magnificent robes, standing inside a resplendent golden palace.
Someone seemed to be asking him whether he was willing.
“I’m willing! I am!”
Of course he wanted his own page in the family genealogy.
He wanted everyone to know that he, Tang Xun, was the most accomplished man in the Tang family.
Tang Xun eagerly agreed.
【Tang Xun has given his consent. The Virtuous Empress Development System is now officially bound to Tang Xun.】
A voice suddenly appeared in his mind like a thunderclap, blasting Tang Xun’s thoughts into a complete blank.
The Virtuous Empress System?
Him, a virtuous empress?
Seriously?