“Don’t hate me.”
Looking down and staring at Sumire’s white palms, I ended up blurted out something completely different.
What on earth am I even saying right now?
This is a total losing move. I’m a complete loser.
But that was my true feeling.
Whether Sumire is being selfish or acting sly, none of that really matters anymore. I don’t want to fight over something like this.
Sumire always says selfish things, and I just go along with it saying it can’t be helped, and that’s how we’ve always gotten along so well all this time.
Sumire’s hand touched my head.
While stroking my hair, she pulled my whole body in close.
“As if I could ever hate you over something like this.”
My face was buried right against Sumire’s chest.
Filling my nose. A nice scent. Sumire’s scent.
“Sorry for teasing you.”
Even though she was just patting my back and head, it felt like my heart was being grabbed. She squeezed me tight. This was my first time feeling anything like this.
“I’m sorry too…”
“You don’t have to apologize. Aoi didn’t do anything wrong at all.”
I felt like crying.
But there was no way I could cry here.
So that she wouldn’t notice, so she couldn’t see my face, I wrapped my arms around her waist and clung to her.
Sumire’s body is soft and warm, and it makes me feel safe.
The unpleasant, nervous pounding quickly settled down.
Instead, a different kind of pounding thudded and surged through me.
“…Oh no.”
After hugging for a little while, Sumire muttered softly.
I finally lifted my head. That was the cue for our bodies to pull apart. A faint blush dusted Sumire’s white cheeks.
“Right now, my chest felt all tight and squishy. My heart is still pounding like crazy. Did you notice, Aoi?”
Even if she asks me that, my own heart was pounding just as hard, so I had no room for that.
「”Hey, I wonder if this means I like you? Do you think I’m seriously in love with Aoi?”」
“I-I don’t know about that…”
“But Aoi is seriously in love with me, right…”
“W-Wha!? N-No one said a single thing like that!”
“Eh, really? So, you don’t mean it like that?”
“I-I mean, you see… I don’t really know… Probably, just like Sumire!”
I ran away by saying “just like Sumire.” But it’s true that I don’t really understand.
Even when people around me talked about first loves and things like that, I always answered that I didn’t have anything like that.
That’s why I can’t say it clearly even now.
Maybe I’m just getting confused in the heat of the moment.
While I was making excuses in my head, Sumire’s hand touched my cheek.
“Then, shall we do it one more time? That way you might figure out if you like me.”
“Eh?”
“You know, Aoi’s kiss was amazing. My heart raced like crazy and I got so excited.”
「”W-Wha?”」
“Come on, try it again. Forcefully pushing me against the wall and doing a chu—”
“I am not going to do something like that! That’s why that happened just in the heat of the moment…”
“Where did you learn such an erotic kiss? That’s sketchy~…”
That wasn’t me.
Someone who wasn’t me possessed me… right, like imitating what you see in dramas. Probably.
“I mean, kissing or getting kissed… we’re not even properly dating, so isn’t that kind of bad?”
“Then, do you want to date?”
“D-Date?”
“Yeah, in secret with everyone. If it’s that, it’s fine, right?”
“T-That! You’re messing around like that again…”
“I’m not messing around? I mean, this happened because of Aoi, so take responsibility properly, okay?”
Wait, is this my fault?
If you trace it back, it’s still Sumire’s fault… but if I hadn’t kissed her, things wouldn’t have turned out like this…?
I don’t get it anymore, everything’s a mess.
“You went quiet again. Aoi is so wishy-washy… Well then, I’ll kiss you, so if you hate it, refuse, okay?”
Sumire walked closer until our toes bumped into each other.
I raised my arm, trying to say “wait a minute,” but in reality, I only placed my hand on her waist. I closed my eyes and tilted my face slightly, making it easier for Sumire to kiss me.
Our lips met without a sound.
It felt shallow yet deep. It was a gentle kiss.
“Ah well, we did it. So that means it’s a yes.”
When I opened my eyes, Sumire was smiling. She held up her index finger right in front of me.
“Nfuh, it’s a secret, okay?”
A mischievous smile like a rom-com heroine. The signature pose she was doing this morning too.
Sumire probably sees right through me. Knowing there’s no way I would refuse here. Knowing it went completely according to plan.
And I’ve gone ahead and accepted it with all my might too.
But since it’s frustrating to just admit that, I put up the least bit of resistance.
“…You’re gonna get bored of it right away anyway.”
“I wonder~? Won’t Aoi be the one who gets serious right away?”
“It’s you who should be asking what’s with getting all serious just from a little kiss.”
「”Eee, Aoi has so much experienceー. No way, I’m gonna get attackedー.”」
Sumire muttered in a flat, deadpan voice as she sat down on the sofa.
She beckoned me with her hand, saying “Come here.” Feeling like my pace was completely thrown off, I sat down next to her.
Sumire’s hands wrapped around my upper arms. She brought the tip of her nose close to my neck.
「”Mmm, this is pretty nice. Now I can sniff you as much as I want.”」
“W-Wait, stop it, you’re too close.”
“Why? We’re dating so it’s fine, right?”
“What do you mean ‘because we’re dating’… is that all you have on your mind?”
“Hm? Other than things like that, what kind of things do you mean?”
Sumire made a blank face. Are you kidding me, this girl.
Pushing Sumire’s hand away with my elbow, I took my smartphone out of my bag.
“Well then, for now… should we take a picture together?”
“Hm? Why?”
“You know, to commemorate us starting to date in secret…”
“Whoa, Aoi is really getting into it. I mean, that’s kind of heavyー.”
「”W-Wha? This is normal!”」
Eh, is it not?
Couples out there do things like that, you know.
「”More importantly, let’s decide on a secret sign first. This one looks like it’ll get found out. This one is still okay. This one got exposed.”」
“It’s already exposed though.”
“By the way, Aoi, if you ever cheat on me… you know what’ll happen, right?”
The pressure is strong right away.
Even so, I found myself feeling relieved. For some reason, Sumire’s words felt comforting.
“Mm~~…”
When I stroked her head instead of answering, Sumire let out a purr like a cat and lay face down on my lap.
I vaguely thought that my relationship with Sumire would just keep going on forever like this.
But it was something fragile that could collapse over the smallest thing… sooner or later, it might have been our fated destiny to change.
I don’t wish for such dramatic changes or destiny.
Even if we don’t change, even if we don’t move forward… during all that time, the sensation transmitted to my hands stays the same.
The setting sun stretched deep down to our feet.
Before we knew it, both of us had gone silent. Slowly, a quiet time passed by.
I used my fingers to comb through Sumire’s hair as she made a complete pillow out of my knees.
It feels like, what am I even doing without even changing my clothes, but this isn’t bad either.
As I was lost in such thoughts, Sumire abruptly raised her head.
「”Hey, let’s take a bath before anyone comes back.”」
“A bath? Why?”
「”Because we’re gonna do ecchi after this, right?”」
“Huh?”
…Huh?