He knows you, recognizes you, you…
Hu Shen had seen rams mounting ewes and watched hunting dogs giving birth.
She figured humans couldn’t be all that different.
Her gaze swept over Xie Xixiao, then lifted to meet his deep, wary, and confused eyes. She opened her mouth but ultimately stayed silent.
This man was bound in chains, forced to kneel here. If she were to act like the ewe, she truly didn’t dare turn her back to him.
Over the past year, she had seen clearly—this man was like a wolf, resolute and sharp, his blood hot and his hatred just as fierce. If she really did that to him, he’d probably tear her throat out.
Perhaps because she stared too long, Xie Xixiao seemed to sense something unusual. His brow twitched slightly. “Miss Tuoba, do you have something to say to me?”
Hu Shen simply couldn’t bring herself to say it. She only mumbled, “You’ll know when the time comes.”
She stood up with the bowl, took off the outermost sheepskin cloak she was wearing, and draped it over his waist and abdomen.
His back was still injured, so she couldn’t properly wrap the cloak around him. The tent was bitterly cold, and she worried he might freeze to death before they even reached that point.
Hu Shen had thought about it—if Xie Xixiao died, she wouldn’t be dragged into this. But she could tell her elder brother wanted this first achievement.
She had been raised by her elder brother since childhood. Back then, he could have abandoned her, but he didn’t. Even the food and furs he obtained were always given to her first.
If possible, she wanted to help her brother.
Hu Shen tugged at the sleeves of the cloak, leaned in, and tied a knot behind Xie Xixiao’s waist to keep it from slipping off.
Her sudden closeness made Xie Xixiao stiffen. He frowned and looked down at her, just as Hu Shen glanced up and met his gaze.
He seemed on the verge of speaking but held back. Hu Shen didn’t think anything was amiss and said as usual, “I’ll bring you more food tonight.”
Winter on the grasslands was brutally cold.
Hu Shen disliked winter the most. Not only was the cold unbearable, but food was also pitifully scarce.
Normally, whether from hunting or plundering from Zhongyuan, everything had to be handed over to be distributed by the lord they served. Those who worked more received more, while the elderly, weak, sick, and young also got their share. This was the rule that allowed the grassland people to survive generation after generation. But for Zhongyuan people on the grasslands, few lords were willing to offer protection.
Their mother was from Zhongyuan, but her elder brother was different from her. She was a woman, not as strong or tall as her brother. She lacked the ability to win a lord’s protection, so for many years, she had relied on her brother.
Later, she grew up, her frame stretched, and she gained strength. Women on the grasslands were all skilled workers, and those who could endure hardship were everywhere. She was stronger than Zhongyuan women but still fell short compared to grassland women. Proving herself useful, so her brother wouldn’t have to work so hard, was difficult.
As she left the tent, the flap fell, and she seemed to see Xie Xixiao’s eyes still fixed on her—probing, wary. Yet she felt he was like a lamb awaiting slaughter, waiting to enter the trap, to be devoured by her and the other two women.
But what use was wariness? The ram that butted someone ended up being chopped a few extra times while roasting, just to soak in the flavor better.
“Hu Shen, what are you thinking about?”
Someone called her abruptly. She turned and saw Zhuo Li walking toward her, holding a freshly skinned sheep hide.
Zhuo Li wore a bearskin coat given by her husband, followed by two little ones—the elder ten years old, the younger five. They were born to her and her husband’s elder brother while he was still alive. Years of labor and winter winds had tanned her face and dried her skin, but her smile shone like the sun, and her loud voice brought joy to those who heard it.
She urged in Xianbei tongue, “Let’s go treat the sheepskins. It’s getting cold—the tents will be blown down by the wind.”
She walked over to Hu Shen and nudged her with a shoulder. “Where’s your cloak? It’s freezing by the river. Go back and put it on.”
Hu Shen mumbled a vague reply, took the sheepskin from her to carry, and reached for the elder child’s hand with her other hand, walking together toward the river.
Zhuo Li was fortunate—both were boys. Once they grew a bit older, they could join the adults in hunting, and life would only get better.
The riverbank was indeed bitterly cold, especially numbing to the hands. After soaking in the river water for a while, the hands would go numb, though they might itch unbearably later when warmed. Yet such frostbite was as common as eating or drinking.
Since their victory a year ago, Southern Liang had sent plenty of food and supplies—called rewards, but in truth, it was still a plea for peace. This was good too, allowing many on the grassland to survive the winter.
Living in such a place, she ought to have grown numb to killing long ago.
To survive, the grassland people had to raid, but taking from the Zhongyuan people meant the Zhongyuan people could no longer live.
Even so, when she saw captured Zhongyuan women, starving and freezing grassland women, grassland men wounded by bears or wolves, or Zhongyuan men whose stored grain had been plundered clean, she still felt suffocated. She wished to grow more numb, to shrink herself smaller, like a clump of wool washed away, so that her existence would bring no disaster to anyone.
Zhuo Li was always so cheerful, chattering nonstop: “Tomorrow night there’s a bonfire. The Khan is sure to reward many things, and your elder brother will surely get the most again.”
Hu Shen forced a smile. “Perhaps.”
But she knew her elder brother would indeed receive the most—not only because he was now favored by the Khan, but also because tomorrow night, his only sister would be bestowed upon a Zhongyuan man. This was the reward for her brother’s loyalty.
Truthfully, deep down, she believed that talk of bearing a child to tie a man’s heart was nonsense spouted by that wicked Zhongyuan defector.
How many women a man had, so many children he could have—how could that tie him down?
Children couldn’t even tie down a woman, just like her mother. Her mother had given birth to her and her brother, yet it never changed her longing to return to her homeland, to seize every chance to escape back. Even when caught and on the brink of death, she refused to stay on the grassland, wishing her ashes to scatter with the wind and drift home.
But the Zhongyuan people were suspicious and stingy. Women who escaped back from the grassland were seen as a disgrace; generals who fled back were viewed as traitors who had defected to the enemy.
The filth of Zhongyuan would stain them black, unwashed even by the purest snowmelt from the highest mountains. From the moment they set foot on the grassland, it seemed the Zhongyuan had only one path left—death.
What the Khan decided, no one could change.
The following evening, a bonfire was lit in the clearing outside the camp.
Food would be distributed, but women were not permitted to eat the roasted meat or drink the strong liquor.
But this night was different. There were many more women at the feast, and even Hu Shen could sit beside her elder brother. She glanced around and saw over ten women, each positioned behind their respective lords.
Her elder brother pushed the food in front of him toward her and wrapped his large hand around hers. "Are you cold?"
Outside, her elder brother would intentionally speak Xianbei with her, as if doing so could conceal the Zhongyuan blood running through their veins.
Hu Shen shook her head, but her elder brother still took off his outer robe and draped it over her. He had been away for several days and had only returned today with the Khan. Seeing her, he scolded her for wearing too little.
She looked up and noticed the wolf-tooth chain tied around his forehead. "A gift from the Khan?"
Tuoba Hu Lang paused, nodded to her, then reached out to pat her head, gently brushing her braid over her shoulder. "I can stay a few more days this time and spend more time with you."
Hu Shen looked at him but sensed a flicker of evasion in his amber eyes.
From the moment he saw her today, whether in speech or action, he had seemed stiff. It was likely because of the matter of betrothing her to a man from Zhongyuan. He knew better than anyone how difficult life was for children of Zhongyuan descent on the grasslands.
He spoke hoarsely, "Don’t worry. Just do your best. As long as I’m here, even if it doesn’t work out, it’s fine. No one will bully you in the future."
Hu Shen smiled at him. "I’ll do my best."
Her gaze drifted toward the surrounding darkness. Perhaps the spies were hidden there now, waiting for the grand spectacle the Khan had prepared for them.
When the time seemed right, a man stepped forward to flatter the Khan, praising him for his loyalty, his respect for talent, and his humility. He claimed that he, like the others, had surrendered out of genuine loyalty.
But Hu Shen thought to herself, what humility? It was doubtful whether the Khan even understood such words.
Her elder brother whispered beside her, "That’s the one who came up with the idea. His name is Yuan Shigong. He used to serve as a deputy general."
The man was around forty, not particularly tall, with narrow eyes and a thin mustache. He did indeed look treacherous.
A man rotten to the core.
Hu Shen chewed on her meat, thoroughly despising him in her heart.
The Khan soon followed his words and began bestowing rewards—fine wine, cattle, sheep, tents, and finally, women. In the Khan’s words, the six stubborn ones became newly surrendered, formidable generals.
Hu Shen’s name was called. She stepped forward and knelt on one knee alongside the other women, accepting the command.
Later, she withdrew with the other women.
News traveled fast. When she returned to her tent, she encountered Zhuo Li, whose usual smile was gone. "Your elder brother is so capable. Why would the Khan still give you away? That man from Zhongyuan is fierce. My husband saw him on the battlefield. If he hadn’t run fast, his head would have been cut off. What about you? Will your head be cut off too?"
Hearing this, Hu Shen laughed, finding her somewhat endearing. She quickly pulled her into the tent and shared some of the rewards the Khan had given her.
She reassured her, "The Khan wants me to be his woman. He won’t cut off my head."
Zhuo Li didn’t believe it, and truth be told, neither did Hu Shen.
So she thought to herself that before Xie Xixiao sincerely surrendered, she must never let him touch a weapon.
As night deepened, Hu Shen saw Zhuo Li off and waited alone in her tent for her elder brother to return.
She sat by the campfire inside the tent, warming her hands. When Hu Lang entered, he carried a wine jug, the scent of alcohol clinging to him.
Hu Shen hurriedly reached out to support him, but he steadied himself, gazing deeply at her before pressing the wine flask into her hand. "Xie Xixiao—I've clashed with him many times. He's a fiery-tempered man and likely won't yield to you. Take this and make him drink it."
Her hand stiffened instantly, and her sense of smell seemed to sharpen at that moment—she thought she caught a whiff of blood.
Such things were common on the grasslands. After hunting deer, they would make deer-blood wine to drink. It was said to stir excitement, and they would drink it before entering their tents to torment the women inside.
She never imagined that one day, her own brother would personally hand her such a thing.
"Go now."
"Now?" Hu Shen looked up in surprise. "It's so late, and he's still injured. Brother, can't we have someone remove the chains from him and let him recover for a few more days?"
Hu Lang placed a hand on her shoulder to reassure her. "Don't worry, the chains have already been taken off. But you can wait—Naye and Guzi won't wait for him to heal."
Naye and Guzi were the other two women bestowed upon Xie Xixiao.
Hu Lang tightened his grip on her shoulder. "Little sister, now that we've come this far, we must see it through perfectly. We can't let all our efforts go to waste in the end. He knows you, he's familiar with you—you'll have an easier time than those two. Little sister, persuade him to surrender, make him serve the Khan. As long as he's willing, once we conquer Zhongyuan in the future, I promise you a life of comfort. We'll go to Mother's homeland, live in a grand mansion, with servants at our beck and call, and never suffer the hardships of the grasslands again."
Hu Shen's breathing grew rapid at his words, the wine flask in her hand turning scalding hot. Her mind spun with dizziness, and by the time she regained her senses, her brother had already pushed her out of the tent.
Her brother was right—since she had already decided to do this, if someone else beat her to it, wouldn't all her efforts be in vain?
Her steps heavy, she clenched the wine flask tightly and walked toward Xie Xixiao's tent.
Author's Note: