Not marrying is unwillingness, yet marrying also seems unwilling…
Upon hearing this, Yan Tongshu immediately threw away the leaf in her hand and straightened up to look at Yan Liangrong.
Yan Liangrong's red lips parted as she spoke: "Tongshu, when Father was alive, our Yan family was once unrivaled in the capital. Later, Father offended Prince Ming, and the Yan family began to decline. Then, after you entered Xianlin Hall, the Yan family completely lost its standing in the capital. Our family cannot go on like this forever, can it?"
Yan Tongshu lowered her head.
Not to mention that she had no desire to leave Xianlin Hall, even if she did, she still carried the crime of deceiving the emperor. If she were to leave Xianlin Hall to seek merit and attract attention, it would surely bring about fatal consequences.
Yan Liangrong sighed: "Tongshu, I know it’s not easy to leave Xianlin Hall."
Yan Tongshu raised her eyes to meet Yan Liangrong's gaze: "So, what is your idea, Sister?"
Yan Liangrong's eyes sharpened, and her voice lowered: "Rather than being trapped to death in Xianlin Hall, it’s better to place our hopes on your brother-in-law. The position of Chaofeng Lang is currently vacant. Why not provide some financial support to your brother-in-law and help him secure the position? In the future, as he rises step by step, he can also pull you out of Xianlin Hall and restore the Yan family’s prestige."
Yan Tongshu could understand Yan Liangrong’s anxiety.
Yan Liangrong had always been a competitive and unyielding person. Zheng Chun had missed several opportunities for promotion due to various reasons, and now, as he approached thirty and entered middle age, how could she not feel anxious?
However… this was not the first time Yan Liangrong had asked the Yan family to support Zheng Chun.
Yan Tongshu lowered her eyes and tactfully declined: "But… Sister, the money is all in Mother’s hands. My monthly salary is also entirely handed over to Mother for distribution. The allocation of family funds depends entirely on Mother."
Yan Liangrong’s phoenix eyes gleamed sharply: "I know, but you are the son. Everything in the Yan family will belong to you in the future. I must first discuss this with you before speaking with Mother, so as not to harm our sibling bond. Don’t you agree?"
Yan Tongshu changed the subject again: "Mother must be waiting anxiously. Let’s go over first."
Yan Tongshu turned to leave, but Yan Liangrong smiled and tugged at her sleeve: "Take your time, no rush. Later, if I speak with Mother, you should also put in a good word for your brother-in-law."
With things laid bare to this extent, there was no room for ambiguity anymore.
Yan Tongshu stood still and said seriously: "Sister, although these words may hurt our sibling bond, I can only say that I cannot help you."
Yan Liangrong’s smile froze on her face.
Yan Tongshu continued: "Sister, I am nominally the only son of the Yan family, responsible for upholding the family’s reputation. But both you and I know that the one who truly makes decisions in the family is Mother. The last time you came home seeking financial help, Mother had already refused."
Moreover, that was Yan Liangrong’s fourth time returning home to ask for help.
Mother had said that things should not be repeated more than three times.
Yan Tongshu’s tone was calm but firm: "Sister, if Mother agrees to help Brother-in-law rise to power, I will have absolutely no objections. But if I speak up for you, it will put Mother in a difficult position. I do not want to harm our sibling bond, nor do I want to hurt Mother."
Yan Liangrong pursed her lips, her eyes revealing a strong stubbornness: "I have been urging your brother-in-law to build his connections in the official circles. He is truly working hard. You cannot dismiss him just because he has been unlucky for a while."
She raised her head and looked directly at Yan Tongshu, her eyes blazing: "I believe in your brother-in-law. With hard work, he can definitely climb to a position as high as Father's."
Yan Tongshu carefully chose his words, testing the waters cautiously: "Actually, I think our current life is quite good."
No need to work, easy to slack off, no hardship, money to be made, and no worry about the day when the crime of deceiving the emperor might be uncovered, leading to the execution of the entire family.
Yan Tongshu: "Moreover, I see that Brother-in-law has a sincere and gentle temperament and seems quite content and satisfied with his current life."
Yan Liangrong shot him a sharp glance, stating firmly: "Tongshu, your brother-in-law will definitely succeed. I believe in him."
Yan Tongshu: "…"
Yan Liangrong's personality was just this strong-willed and stubborn. Just as when Madam Yan had forbidden her from marrying Zheng Chun, she had insisted on doing so. What she wanted, she would get.
Seeing that continuing the conversation would strain their sibling relationship, Yan Tongshu quickly changed the subject: "It's getting late. Let's go pay our respects to Mother first. We can discuss everything else later."
Yan Liangrong nodded in agreement: "Mm."
Soon, the two arrived at Madam Yan Deng Yingci's residence. After chatting for a while, Yan Liangyu also arrived.
Yan Liangrong's appearance resembled Madam Yan's more—bright and dignified. Yan Liangyu, on the other hand, took after her biological mother, the concubine Chen Meirong, gentle and elegant like a secluded orchid.
Yan Liangyu bowed in greeting: "Mother, your daughter pays her respects."
Madam Yan raised her hand slightly: "Rise."
Yan Liangyu sat down beside Yan Tongshu: "Elder Brother, I'll sit next to you."
Yan Tongshu handed her a piece of pastry: "White Jade Cake, your favorite."
Yan Liangyu smiled sweetly: "Thank you, Elder Brother."
As she spoke, Yan Liangyu took the White Jade Cake in her hand and took a delicate bite.
Seeing that everyone had arrived, Madam Yan said solemnly: "The Zhou family will be here soon. When they arrive, everyone must be alert and not lose propriety."
Everyone replied in unison: "Yes."
Madam Yan looked at Yan Liangyu, her posture dignified: "Liangyu, especially you."
Yan Liangyu put down the pastry and straightened her back.
Madam Yan leaned slightly toward Yan Liangyu: "Before your mother arrives, I have some words to say to you carefully."
Yan Liangyu replied meekly: "Yes, Mother."
Madam Yan: "I never approved of your relationship with Zhou Zhengxun."
Yan Liangyu's fingers trembled slightly, her embroidered handkerchief twisting tightly in her hands.
Madam Yan looked at Yan Liangyu, her gaze as gentle as water yet filled with immense strength: "Back then, you were young and impulsive, doing some foolish things with that Zhou Zhengxun, forcing both families to acknowledge this engagement. Mother also knows that you truly admired Zhou Zhengxun, and Zhou Zhengxun genuinely cared for you at the time.
But now, the Zhou family has risen in status and is no longer what it used to be. Over the years, Mother has swallowed her pride, and your mother has also set aside her dignity, repeatedly negotiating with the Zhou family to set a wedding date. Yet the Zhou family has made endless excuses, delaying until today."
Yan Liangyu's long eyelashes trembled, and her face suddenly turned pale: "It is my fault for causing Mother and my mother to suffer."
Seeing her distress, Madam Yan felt pained as well and comforted her: "Actually, this is not your fault. Back then, you were only thirteen, too young to understand human affairs. In the end, this matter is the Zhou family's fault.
The Zhou family arranged your engagement with Zhou Zhengxun but delayed mentioning marriage and refused to break off the engagement. That is why things have dragged on to this embarrassing point and why your age has been delayed."
Madam Yan spoke, her heart truly aching. She placed a hand over her chest, pressed gently, took a steadying breath, and then continued, "Today, Mother must be completely honest with you. You are already sixteen, and after the new year, you will be seventeen. From matchmaking and discussing marriage proposals to finalizing the engagement, negotiating between the two families, selecting an auspicious date, and finally holding the wedding—all of this requires at least half a year. If we delay any further, there will be no suitable, well-matched families left for you to consider.
So, today's marriage discussion is Mother's final effort on your behalf. When the Zhou family arrives later, you are not to speak. Leave everything to Mother. If we cannot settle on a wedding date today, then this marriage will be called off. Fortunately, we have only exchanged birth charts so far, and no betrothal gifts have been given. When the time comes, Mother will withdraw from the engagement on your behalf and retrieve your birth chart. Then, we will arrange a better match for you."
"Yes," Yan Liangyu replied softly, bowing her head without protest.
From the tumultuous elopement at thirteen to now, nearly seventeen, the days had slowly dragged by.
At first, she had been naive, unable to grasp the Zhou family's intentions.
Now, after nearly four years, even she understood.
It was simply a matter of the Zhou family weighing the pros and cons, evaluating her worth, and deciding whether she was worth marrying into their family.
Suddenly, Yan Liangyu felt warmth on the back of her hand. She looked up to see Yan Tongshu holding her hand, comforting her, "Don't be sad. Things will work out in the end."
Yan Liangyu nodded.
In truth, at this moment, she could no longer distinguish her own feelings.
After dragging on for so long, marrying Zhou Zhengxun had become an obsession—she was unwilling to give up on the marriage, yet she also seemed unwilling to go through with it.
Stuck in the middle, unable to move forward or step back.
Was she sad? Did she even know whether she was sad or not anymore?