"So what brought about this spontaneous date?" I tried for what must have been the fifteenth time to pry some detail- some tiny clue of what my evening held in store, but Deyha just shrugged as she had the last fourteen times I'd tried to phrase my confusion.
"The forecast." She spoke, surprising me with a clue I could actually go on.
"Is it… another clear night?"
"Not really." She exited the highway to a little state route. We hadn't been driving that long so I doubted this was a surprise over-night camping trip. q
"Do you want me to stop asking?"
I expected another shrug, but she 'hmm'd and tapped at the steering wheel. "I wouldn't want you to stop asking, much less stop being curious… but I'm also simply not going to tell you my plans."
"Not even indirectly?" I laid my hand over hers where she was holding the lid of her picnic basket shut.
She gave my fingers a brief squeeze but otherwise continued to foil my attempts to peek.
I opted to read road signs instead.
Wildlife and burn ban notices mingled with the typical highway markers until the first really noteworthy sign came up. "Third Corner State Park."
"I didn't pack for camping. Or even dress for it tbh." I gestured at my new sunflower dress.
"No worries." Deyha gave my hand another squeeze. "I brought a blanket for us to lie on."
"Don't national parks usually frown on that sort of debauchery?"
"Picnicing? I think they get pretty upset if you litter but I wouldn't call a pleasant meal out in nature 'debachery', would you?"
"Aha! So it's a picnic!"
Deyha chuckled and gave a brief meaningful glance at the basket before smirking at me. "Very well intuited. My super secret plan has always been to trick you into a dinner date at dinner time.."
"To be fair, I still don't know what's for dinner."
Deyha let go of my hand to lift the lid of the basket. "Apple pie, cheap wine, and hummus with chips."
"And the scissors?"
"Those aren't for eating."
I shook my head and sighed. To an extent it only made sense that it would be so difficult to get straight answers from one so very queer.
I let the mystery be and turned my attention back to the road. We'd graduated from a winding four lane highway to a little two lane road through a canopy of trees. I rolled my window down and held my hand out to feel the wind. We weren't going particularly fast but I still enjoyed the relative serenity of the sounds from the truck's tires and engine bouncing back off of the various tree trunks, kinda like someone was randomly choosing volumes on a white noise machine.
Gradually the trees thinned and we turned off onto a dirt trail. Camp sites and little staked out parking spots dotted the side of the trail with accompanying numbered markers and Deyha pulled into one just as the road began to make a hard turn.
I hopped out and stretched. None of the camp sites we passed were occupied, and I could just spy one tent through all the tree trunks halfway down the return road. I wagered that was pretty adequate as far as privacy was concerned.
"I didn't see a tent in the picnic box"
"There wasn't one, goober. The spot I had in mind is just a little walk that way." Deyha pointed toward a sign that indicated 'lake access' and a pretty well beaten trail into the woods.
"I didn't see fishing rods either." I remarked, but Deyha just shook her head this time.
I pulled the gigantic bundled blanket out of the bed of the truck and followed Deyha. The ground was cool under my hooves, no doubt from all the shade the trees provided here, and besides the birdsong and rustling leaves, it was so blissfully quiet. Even more-so than It was on the farm just by virtue of there being no facilities or nearby highways.
Deyha held the basket in the crook of one elbow so I occupied her other hand with mine as we made our way down the trail. The pads of my toe beans were already pretty tough, but I took care to avoid sticks and stones as the trees thinned out around us.
In no time I could see the water and I had to shade my eyes from the glare of the sun.
"Sunsets are probably amazing here."
"Ding ding ding, we have a winner." Deyha chuckled.
"That wasn't a guess!"
"Oh well."
Soon we were clear of the trees and I could see where the undergrowth thinned out into an exceptionally rough patch of rocks. There was no real beach to speak of but there was plenty of space with grass and wildflowers that would make for plush padding under a blanket.
Deyha pointed out a patch and I set about unclasping the belts that held the bundle closed. It seemed a bit heavy with hard lumps for just a blanket and sure enough I found a beach parasol collapsed down surprisingly small in the center. Deyha took that part and by the time I had the blanket spread out she had expanded it to be nearly as large as the already king sized blanket.
I debated telling her there wasn't much sun left to shade from but I sensed I'd already critiqued more than enough of her plans. She set it down to block the glare off the water and set the picnic basket on the center of the blanket.
I thought she would pull out the chips but instead she grabbed the garden qshears that I had taken to be scissors.
"You know, scissors aren't actually involved in scissoring, right?"
"Mhmm. I was actually hoping you'd make that joke." She handed me the smaller pair. "It's for the grass. I figured it wouldn't hurt to get you some really fresh food for a change."
"We're… eating their grass?"
"Mhmm."
I followed her toward the water where patches of reedy grass cropped up.
"These are invasive." Deyha stepped over a few rocks and knelt down next to a patch. "A while back I actually took a quick contract to come and clear the place out. It's good forage, so the park sought out the nearest farm to bring out some cows to munch it down. An honest misunderstanding I'd say. Still, I came out and did a collection a year or so ago, not long after you came to stay with us actually."
She cut the stalks out a little ways above the water line, and I followed her lead on another nearby bunch.
"At this point in the season, the plants are just about to start putting energy back into the roots, so we get to collect the tops when they have the most to offer, while the roots starve through the fall and winter."
I surveyed the nearby beach, only a couple dozen of these patches existed in the first place. "I guess you must have done a pretty good job, because there isn't all that much to collect."
"Thanks. Yeah there was about double this last year, but no matter. And you don't have to eat it of course if you don't like it."
"Is the park paying you to clear it this time?"
Deyha shrugged. "I let them know we are coming and they… encouraged folks to seek other campsites for the weekend."
"So this wasn't so spontaneous after all."
"Never said it was." She shot me a crooked grin and I rolled my eyes.
She didn't seem shy to get her claws wet so I let her grab the farther out bits while I kept to the rocks. The boulders were worn smooth but I found plenty of traction on the moss.
The clouds were just beginning to turn colors when we brought our haul back to the blanket. I'd worried that some wildlife might have been lured toward the picnic basket while we were away, but we found the site completely undisturbed.
"Did you bring something to wash it with? Or is the lake clean enough to use that?"
"The lake would actually make it dirtier in all likelihood." Deyha grunted as she eased herself down onto the blanket. "Keep an eye out for bugs of course but there isn't any pesticide to wash off of these. Trust your gut if it tastes off." She separated off about half of what she had collected and wrapped it in some oversized rubber bands that she had stashed in the basket. "Xander tells me this stuff was pretty middling as far as her favorites go. She ate it, but she probably appreciated it mostly for the variety."
"Mkay." I started chewing on the tops of a reed as I began braiding the rest aimlessly. I'd done rattan dolls and pads in the past but given the even shapes of the reeds I decided I'd try for a basket this time.
"What's in the works for Snaft time today?" Deyha scooted closer on the blanket and I leaned into her as she rested an arm on my shoulder.
"Snaft?"
"Snack-craft. I'm not gonna call it Crack time."
"You're too much." I laughed at the absurdity of the improvised word. "I think I'll try a basket today, though I can promise it won't look as good as that." I nudged the picnic basket with my knee.
"That's fine, it's not a competition after all. Does it taste allright?"
"Oh, yeah. Totally. There's a lot more water in it than I'm used to, almost like miniature celery, but I don't mind that at all. What are you going to eat?"
"Mmmm." Deyha reached into the basket. "Chips and hummus. Though you're welcome to some as well."
"Even if I dip my grass in it?"
"Doesn't bother me as long as it doesn't leave a bunch of bits in the hummus."
I shrugged and relaxed against her. Before long, I could weave in the reeds somewhat blindly so I laid my head back and watched the clouds. They were very fluffy today, well defined and glowing pink and orange around the edges as the sun crept toward the horizon.
"That cloud looks like a baby turtle." I pointed up and Deyha followed my gaze.
"Yeah, I can see it. That one looks like a magical leoplurodon" She pointed at another nearby cloud.
"That's not a thing." I squinted at her but she shook her head.
"Totally a thing. They live on Candy Mountain."
"You're mocking me."
"No! No, not at all. The one you mentioned genuinely looks like a turtle to me--"
"A baby turtle."
Deyha chuckled. "Appologies. A baby turtle. And I suppose if I said it was a baby magical leoplurodon you would be okay with that classification?"
I pretended to think for a moment before nodding and grinning at her.
Deyha sighed and looked up at the clouds again. "So that would make that one… a baby stingray?"
"Sure, I'll accept it."
"Because it's a baby?"
I nodded again and I hummed contentedly as Deyha pulled me close.
Her breath was hot on my ear when she spoke next, "I'm beginning to think you have some sort of fixation on babies, my dear."
"Baby fever is a thing and I have it. Just ask my doctor."
"Truly." Deyha murmured and I forgot about my little grass basket entirely as she reached around to hold my chin.
I turned toward her eagerly, kissing her as if it was a matter of life and death, and when I next opened my eyes I found I had climbed into her lap on instinct. The fabric of my dress was being stretched to its limit as it caught on my knees so I took a moment to pull it free before kissing Deyha again.
"Easy, easy." Deyha murmured against my lips as I settled into her lap. The warmth and pressure between my thighs had done nothing to calm me down, quite the opposite in fact.
"Nobody's looking." I whispered. "You should breed me. Persistence is key, remember?"
Deyha fell back on her elbows and cackled but I followed her down, holding her face to steal another kiss. Still despite everything, I didn't feel like she was getting as excited about the idea as I was.
I sat up, partly to let her catch her breath, partly to focus the pressure on my pelvis against hers.
I spread my hooves a little further to rest just that little bit of additional weight on her lap. I didn't care if she felt the wet spot she was causing, in fact, I hoped she would tease me about it. I hoped she would do something about it.
If I was a little disappointed in her lack of physical responses to my advance, the way she looked up at me helped me not worry it was for lack of interest.
"Carolyn said she was trying to foster an interest in exhibitionism, but I honestly hadn't expected that she had made so much progress."
"This hardly counts, Deyha. There's like two other people in this entire park."
She shook her head. "But your screams could wake the dead I fear, I'm not sure I want to put you through the embarrassment of discovery."
"Then gag me. Shut me up somehow. Hold you hand over my mouth and fuck me." I punctuated the order with a little hop on her hips and she huffed, finally sitting up to loop an arm around my waist.
"What has you so impatient? Are you certain we can't wait until we get back to the farm?"
"Don't get me started on 'waiting'." I narrowed my eyes at her. "I waited a long time for you to ask me out, and I've waited a long time for you to get me pregnant. All I've learned in these last few months is that patience is abso-fucking-lutely not a virtue."
"Okay, okay." Deyha eased me off her lap and moved the basket off the blanket. "I still think it's a bad idea, I don't think I could bear to silence you."
I nodded. "We can work around that. I'll just work you up with my hands and mouth or something and then you can tell me right when you're about to cum so that you can put it inside me."
Now Deyha was blushing, and I could finally see the first indications that she might be getting aroused.
"You don't want to orgasm too?"
I laid a hand on her lap, imagining that she was steaming with heat the way I felt. "Babe, after all the romantic plans you've made today, the last thing I need is another hit of dopamine. I'd love to return all these gestures in kind, but I'm running out of ways to sincerely indicate to you that I want your babies."
"I don't know why I thought it would be an effort to convince you."
"Convince me of what? To have your kids? Honestly Deyha…" I trailed off. "What do you mean? That this was like… a proposal of some sort?" I gestured at the picnic basket.
"Well, not that I was trying to butter you up or something, just that…" Deyha scratched the back of her head. "Carolyn found someone that can do the invitro and prenatal care."
"Then yes, the answer is fucking yes."
"I haven't even--"
I tackled Deyha, taking a little less care than I probably should have to be gentle. Still, I figured she got the message as I kissed her.
"I repeat." I spoke against her lips before kissing her again. "The answer is yes. Now would you kindly fuck me?"
"I'm so sorry," Deyha held my hips and eased me back so that she could sit up. "But as much as I love you, the answer is still no."
"Deyhaaaa~" I whined but she was completely unmoved.
"Once we're home I'd be more than happy-- overjoyed in fact-- to attend to you, but I'm not okay with doing anything here."
"How rudely fucking valid of you." I grumbled, trying to inject some humor despite my disappointment. "If debauchery is off the picnic blanket then… I don't know. How long did you want to stay out? Is it too early for pie and wine?"
"I was thinking we could stay late enough to see if the clouds clear out for stargazing, but I'd settle for watching the sunset before we pack up." Deyha tugged the wine bottle free of the basket and used the shears to tear off the foil cover. I thought we would be out of luck without a cork screw, but it ended up being a screw top bottle.
With a bit more fiddling she got the cap free and she took a tentative sniff of the top.
"Ugh." She stuck out her tongue. "Carolyn told me this was cheap but I didn't know it was inedible."
"What? What's wrong with it?"
Deyha took a sip and wrinkled her nose. I half expected her to spit it out but she just grimaced and screwed the cap back on.
"Carolyn's Aunt sent it as a Christmas gift a while ago and one way or another it has gone off."
"Is it toxic?"
Deyha shrugged. "I feel like alcohol by definition is poison, but no I'm pretty sure it's just a harmless bad taste."
"Lemmie see." I held out my hands for the bottle and after a pause Deyha uncapped it and passed it to me.
I hadn't had many wines in the first place, but whatever I expected this was something a little beyond. The flavor sent me back, hijacking some long buried connection in my brain to a scent I'd known as a child.
"Okay, I promise this is relevant…" I struggled to arrange my explanation. "You know those magic school movies that were big news a few years ago? And now the author is a psycho?"
"Yes?"
"Well, the second movie based on her books had toys with slime, honestly a bit ahead of its time, but there was a model I had where the whole play feature was to pour green slime over figurines." I held up the bottle. "This tastes exactly like that slime smelled. Like, it's dead on. I don't know what ingredients they could possibly have in common, but I just had the strangest blast from the past of playing for hours and hours with this gross smelly slime and wizard figurines."
"That… is pretty weirdly specific."
"I have little control over the pathways my mind forms." I took another sip and spat on the grass. "Nope, still nasty."
"When you said you'd try anything twice I didn't think you meant it literally."
"I'm just special like that." I handed her the bottle and set aside the unintelligible tangle of grass I'd made. "Now how would you like to kill time while the sun plunges inexorably toward the horizon?"
Deyha hummed and rummaged in the basket. "Hard to say, especially since even talking about snacks could wind you up." She retrieved the hummus and popped the lid off.
"And whose fault is that, hmm?"
"I suppose I must take responsibility."
"Oops, you stumbled on another phrase, I've been set off again." I drawled sarcastically and got up on my hands and knees.
"No I didn't!" She laughed, "this is like playing minesweeper on max difficulty, I swear."
"Then it's a skill issue."
"What did I even say?"
"There's a whole trope about having one of the people in a sex scene say they will 'take responsibility' before or right after possibly getting someone pregnant." I crawled around to kneel behind her and began scratching lightly at her back.
"I… can see how that would be a trope you'd familiarize yourself with."
I shrugged. "Try it out sometime if you want. Just maybe not right this instant unless you have some sort of kink for winding me up."
"Nope. Definitely not my kink. I assure you, I don't seek out ways to make you horny just to watch you squirm."
"Then maybe stop talking about it~" I sang through gritted teeth and dug in a little harder with my fingernails.
I knew that giving her any sort of massage was opening me up for accusations that I was trying to lower her inhibitions or some crap like that, but at the immediate moment it just seemed to me to be the most productive way I could fidget.
However, instead of teasing, Deyha relaxed under my hands; slumping forward and hunching her shoulders as I worked over the skin.
The old armor plates had long since been modded away, but Deyha's skin had remained textured by the experience. I'd caught her rubbing her back on the corner of a wall once after insisting that it "didn't itch" and there was "no discomfort" so Carolyn and I had been doing our best to make things easier.
Carolyn had even begun working on ideas to renew the skin entirely, but Deyha was insistent on keeping her scars. She wore them almost like they were tattoos, and besides, the zigzagging arrows were interesting, even if they looked a little strange.
Deyha chuckled as I pulled her shirt up and felt around for skin flakes.
"Yeah, yeah." I mumbled. "I'm not trying to take your clothes off, babe."
"I wasn't going to say it."
"You were thinking it real loud."
Regular back scratches tended to help keep the skin on her back from getting itchy, but I'd found that despite my best efforts some spots insisted on shedding skin in layers as though constantly healing from a sunburn. Peeling them had become a guilty pleasure of mine, and I knew Deyha didn't mind.
She flexed her shoulders briefly before sighing. "I wonder if the skin will ever just act normal."
"I think if it was going to figure itself out without genetic intervention it would have done so by now-- though we can try some creams to rule out skin conditions."
"Mmmm" Deyha hummed non-committally.
I fixed her shirt and smoothed the wrinkles before scratching like I had in the beginning. "Or, I could just keep giving back scratches all the time, making you so completely dependent on my care that you never…" I trailed off.
"Never what?"
"I didn't think that far ahead. I'm trying to think of something funny that doesn't either seek to control you or feed into some rejection sensitivity on my part."
"Speaking of rejection sensitivity, you've handled the letdown just now pretty well. I'm proud of you."
I leaned forward and draped my arms over her shoulders. Seeing an opening I nabbed the chip that she had just stuck in the hummus.
"Thanks babe. I do my best. Also sorry for stealing your chip.-- not that I'm actually sorry, but I feel like I should say so anyways."
Deyha laughed and shook her head. "Yes. Stolen. Because I definitely would have just left a chip poking out of the hummus if I didn't want you to take it."
This time I took the one out of her hand. "How about now, smarty pants?" I went to eat it as well but she caught my wrist, redirecting my movement to her own mouth instead.
"All according to plan."
I rolled my eyes and sat back to continue rubbing her shoulders. Occasionally she would hold up a chip for me and we settled into a comfortable silence as we snacked.
Once the sun was low enough that it didn't hurt to look at the sky, Deyha moved the umbrella away and I laid back on the blanket next to her. The clouds we had pointed out before were long gone and the few that were left were on their way out, swept away by winds that seemed to only exist hundreds of feet above us.
"Did you still want to stay until the stars are fully out?" I rolled toward Deyha and rested my head on her shoulder. It was a little bit of an awkward position but I decided to pretend it was the most comfortable place in the universe anyways.
"Given how kind the clouds were to buzz off, I had kinda been leaning toward the idea… but I also don't want to keep you longer than you wanted."
"Interesting choice of words."
"You know I don't mean--"
"I do, I do. I'm just a gremlin who sometimes says mean things for fun. I want you to keep me forever of course, but as beautiful as the stars will be, I have more earthly priorities right now."
"Oh, is it time for an extraction?"
I sat up to squint at Deyha. "Kinda, but I think you know that's not what I meant."
"Bathroom break?"
"You're a butt." I got up on my hands and knees and crawled over to the parasol. With a bit of fiddling I was able to figure out how to collapse it. I stood and stretched as Deyha folded the blanket. I handed her the folded umbrella: I couldn't help but think that I hadn't collapsed it quite as neatly as Deyha would have liked, but she didn't hesitate long before she was rolling the blanket around it.
"So what now? Do you just want to head back?" She took the bundle of reeds out of the basket and handed it to me so that the lid could shut.
"Well I certainly don't want to take any stops on the way."
"What do you want to do once we are home?"
I smirked. "Now, now, Deyha. It's not polite to refer to a person as a 'what'. It's basic grammar and politeness to ask 'who' I want to do."
"Okay, point made."