[2-12 Bible Black Aphrodisiac A clearly labelled bottle full of powerful aphrodisiacs made from a combination of magic and modern medicine.
One pill is enough to make someone lose consciousness from masturbating.
Overuse can easily result in death.] [3-17 Blue Archive Abydos Classroom Desk With Lunch Boxes A desk with someone’s warm and hearty bento on it.
Because of the roll’s high power, the desk miraculously has a fresh bento appear on it every day at lunchtime when no one is looking.] [10-8 Azur Lane Furniture Sets/Dragon Empery Estate One of the items on this page is summoned, chosen randomly.
Empery Estate Stone Path.
A simple but atmospheric path of flat stones appears around the lot outside of Jiro’s apartment.] Amidst training for the tournament and living my daily school life, the latter half of the week passes almost peacefully.
A bottle of pills appears in the night while I’m laying in my futon and failing to keep my thoughts pure.
An impurity reflected when we examine the bottle.
No sweet and wholesome multivitamin gummies this time, no.
High Strength Aphrodisiacs.
TAKE ONE ONLY.
Excess use can result in death from exhaustion.
Nymphomania and impaired judgement will occur rapidly.
Can be taken orally, vaginally, or anally.
Honestly that’s more terrifying than hot.
It gets put away with the same fearful care as the two guns that are also in the apartment, and I think it says a lot about how trustworthy I am that Kaori and Saeko are even willing to stay under the same roof as me when something like that is readily available.
Kind of reminds me of some of the more fucked up things I can make with the mad science knowledge dump in my head.
We get a much more pleasant surprise while Kaori sits on my lap during anime club one day however.
Even if she’s small, she can change her own weight to feel rather more substantial on me while I’m also enduring higher gravity to make the act of watching a fanservice-laden hot spring episode a productive one.
Admittedly the new desk that appeared didn’t quite match up to the others, but it’s still a replacement for the one Toujou destroyed.
And it came with a free bento box, one with those cute little squid-cut sausages, and still warm too!
The weirdest part was the next day, it had another lunchbox on it.
Not as warm, but still tasty.
And when we came in on Saturday, there was another one again.
Actually still warm!
A spooky mystery, but a tasty one too.
[9-6 Senran Kagura Leo Gallery One of the outfits represented by a picture on this page is summoned, chosen randomly.
Leo’s red silk dressing gown appears being worn by Saeko Busujima.] Then on Sunday I wake up, little Jiro already up and at ’em.
I don’t know what I was dreaming about, but perhaps Saeko was involved because when she gets up we can see she’s had one of my old shirts (another one, after the first got destroyed by skeletons) replaced by a luxurious red silk robe that looks amazing on her.
Admittedly I do kind of regret the loss of the ‘boyfriend’s shirt’ aesthetic she’d been content to rock for sleepwear of late, but she doesn’t question what I was dreaming of and just seems happy to have something fine and feminine to wear.
It seems to me a good omen that my power is firing on all cylinders today as we prepare ourselves and head off to Kuoh for our Sunday bout of supernatural combat.
Also I notice the concrete lot outside my apartment now has a border of flat stones forming a path all around it.
Which looks nice but probably isn’t as safe to walk on?
Definitely didn’t hear any of the construction that would’ve gone into putting that stuff down since we got home yesterday, so almost certainly my fault.
No one can prove it though, and it’s just a dilapidated empty lot below an old apartment building, so who’s even going to care?
It’s probably raising the property value.
Naturally Kaori’s monopolised the magic candle costume for herself as usual, and given her lack of other options no one’s likely to contest her on that.
Saeko’s gone back to the same outfit she first got summoned to this world in, right down to the bike pads.
It makes me feel a bit under-dressed for this kind of thing, rocking up to my first supernatural tournament in a basic ass tracksuit like the most stereotypical jobber in the world.
I feel a little bit better when we get there and I can see that the Gremory and Sitri peerages are all just wearing their school uniforms.
As established the school uniforms are classy and look nice, but it’s still pretty low effort, isn’t it?
Even Saeko’s accessorised her uniform and swapped out the basic skirt for a sexy thigh-slit one!
We all meet in the gymnasium, with Nanael soon arriving as well.
She’s brought with her Mittelt and the same gang that was there when she first made her challenge, along with three new additions.
One’s a guy with white hair wearing a black longcoat over a white gakuran style suit and a crucifix around his neck, the other’s a blonde girl in a nun outfit, and the last is… Issei Hyoudou?
“Hyoudou-kun, what are you doing in school today?” I’m not the only one confused as Sitri questions his presence, although really the fact he’s palling around with all these supernatural beings should make it pretty obvious he’s in the know.
I know he had sex with Nanael, but why’d she bring him to this tournament?
“Don’t worry, Prez!” he steps forward with a grin, raising up his forearm before there’s a gleam of light and a metallic noise, an elaborate red gauntlet with a big green gem on the back appearing over his arm.
“I’m all clued up about the supernatural world, and I’m here to compete!” “That’s right!” Nanael backs him up, hands on her hips and chin jutted upwards.
“He’s my magnificent Red Dragon Emperor, and I’m counting on him to put on a good showing in this Monarch of Kuoh Tournament!” The boy every girl at school loves to hate is looked at with new eyes in light of this information, though I remember how he’d been when I ran into him outside the church and ask, “Damn dude, did you just awaken your hidden power or something?” He grins even wider.
“I did, it was awesome!” For some reason Mittelt and her friends all glare at that black-haired girl in their group.
Also it probably bears mentioning that that girl is wearing basically just a bunch of spiky leather straps rather than the cute and fashionable blouse-skirt combo I saw her in last time.
Talk about an image change!
Sitri glances at Rias who shrugs in acceptance before the student council president rolls with it.
“Very well.
So we have four groups competing.
Team Sitri, Team Gremory, Team Nanael, and…” she pauses while glancing my way.
“Team Jiro!” I blurt out without thinking, stepping forward and hoping Kaori and Saeko don’t take exception.
“Team Jiro,” fortunately Sitri takes it on board and neither of the girls who came here with me raise an objection to fighting under the banner of my name.
“Battles will be one on one duels fought here in the gymnasium, while each team will be allocated their own nearby space to observe from to reduce the chances of interference.” She concentrates on a magical circle that forms above her hand, which then projects a map of the school zoomed in around the gym.
Rooms marked out then proceed to light up in time with Sitri’s speech as she mentions them.
“Team Gremory will have the boys’ locker room, Team Sitri the girls’.
As they have volunteered the services of a healer, Team Nanael will take the nearby nurse’s office, and Team Jiro will have use of the equipment storage shed.” Why do I feel like I’m getting the short end of the stick with that one?
Nanael however takes that as her cue, putting her hands on the nun’s shoulders and pushing her forward with a timid squeak from the blonde girl.
“Anyone can come and visit between rounds and Asia-chan will heal you right up with Twilight Healing.
It doesn’t matter if you’re a devil or a pervert, this merciful saintly girl will take care of anyone, that’s how pure she is!” Why did she look at me like that when she said pervert?!
“But only if you need healing!” Nanael waggles her finger in chastisement.
“If you just want to come and harass her because she’s cute, you’ll suffer divine punishment!” “N-Nanael-sama!” that’s about all I can make out as the girl babbles the rest in something that sounds French or Italian, her face bright red.
She is cute though.
A blonde girl in a nun’s habit… it reminds me of seeing Akeno in her miko outfit.
Imagine the deadly combination they’d make together!
Honestly it’s kind of amazing Nanael’s managed to put together a group like this so quickly, talk about landing on her feet.
“Thank you Nanael-san, Twilight Healing is a well regarded sacred gear, we are grateful for your thoughtfulness in providing for its use during the tournament,” Sitri says diplomatically.
“Rias, if you would like to cover the actual rules?” she then hands off to the co-owner of Kuoh, at least until and unless this tournament determines another.
“Right!” Rias steps forward with a grin.
“Like Sona-chan said, the tournament is fought by single duels, and we’re going to draw random lots so people on the same team might have to fight each other.
You can forfeit if you want, or take it as a chance to show off!
A barrier’s been set up around the gym, but it’s not invincible, that means you have to follow the rules.
If you destroy the gym or interfere with the barrier, that’s a disqualification.
If anyone suffers serious wounds, the barrier will automatically teleport them to the nurse’s office where Asia-chan can heal them, so if you mess with that it’s like saying you plan on killing your opponent for real.
This is the same system used in rating games, so everyone can be at ease and fight freely so long as you follow the rules.” I can see everyone listening seems to be getting pumped up by Rias’s speech, the impending draw of no holds barred supernatural combat clearly one that everyone here can understand the appeal of.
“Now, because Sona-chan and I are the existing overseers of Kuoh, we’re exercising our privilege to skip the early rounds.
The winner of the semi-finals from the top bracket will have to face me, and the winner of the bottom bracket’s semi-final has to face Sona-chan.
Other than that we’re going to have a draw to decide the other brackets, although…” she pauses while going over the numbers present and doing some mental math.
“There’s an odd number of people here.” Huh.
Does that mean we have to do a qualifier, like a test of strength or something to eliminate the weakest?
Yet as people trade looks and surely speculate on how we’re going to reconcile this, the white-haired guy in Nanael’s group makes a, “Yare yare,” noise and spreads his arms.
“I’m just an ordinary human so it’s not as if I had much chance of winning.
I’ll bow out so I can focus on guarding the sister instead.” “Yeah you definitely wouldn’t have won anyway,” Nanael instantly agrees, making his ‘nobly self-sacrificing’ expression twitch angrily before he plasters on a smile and theatrically steps back from the rest of his group.
The tournament brackets are then drawn up while Shinra produces one of those lottery crank wheels for assigning places randomly, people starting to turn it for their numbers to be determined.
Before I can take my own turn however, a short blonde girl wearing an abundance of lace and ruffles marches up to me.
“Kyuhuhu, I never expected you to actually turn up, fatty!” Mittelt gives a saccharine giggle, leaning forward and looking up with a playful fanged grin.
“What’s your fighting technique?
Threaten with a gun and violate the girls into submission?
There’s lots of ripe targets for you in this field!” Kaori instantly lets out a delighted sounding gasp and asks, “Wait, is this the girl you had sex with?” Please God kill me now.
“Why are you like this?” I ask in a despairing tone of voice, trying to block out the sensation of judgemental eyes on me from everyone else in the gym.
“You didn’t complain last time I ran into you in your dirty tracksuit,” she counters, pressing her dainty hand into the pudge of my belly and making a pleased sound, although mercifully this time she does not work her hand down below the waistband of my pants.
Even fallen angels have some sense of propriety in public it seems.
“I was… swept up in the moment!” I try to muster some form of defence, though I know it hardly sounds good.
“Awww, would you like it more if I was an obedient daughter instead of a bad girl who needs your firm hand, Daddy?” she coos and I am doing everything I fucking can to stay calm and not pop a boner in this situation even when her calling me that in that voice reminds me of some of the most glorious moments spent nailing her against the stained glass window.
There’s definitely some strain in my voice as I tell her, “It wouldn’t hurt if you were nicer, yeah.” Her smile grows wider.
“Really?
Do you want a sloppy girlfriend experience with Mittelt?
A small girl sitting on your lap and showering you with deep wet kisses before letting you breed her with some doting baby-making sex while holding hands?” her hand creeps off my belly to find my own, lacing her delicate fingers between my thicker ones to further emphasise her teasing.
[7-11 Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid Special 7 Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Wedding An episode all about weddings from different cultures.
This summons a wedding dress.
Being worn by Mittelt.] I tried, I swear to God I tried, but there’s a tightness in my pants and Mittelt’s bare fingers against mine are suddenly wreathed in ivory silk, matching the white dress she now wears, sleeker than her elegant gothic lolita ensemble and leaving her shoulders bare, but making up for it with a much longer skirt, though one that’s about as filled out and voluminous as the petticoat-supported one she had on before.
Even the black bow on her head has been replaced by a white one with sweet smelling yellow roses in the centre.
She looks adorable.
She looks innocent.
She looks like a bride.
She doesn’t even seem to have realised it at first, smirking up at me even as surprised noises come from those around us.
“Oh, you like that don’t you, you big sensitive brute!
Kyuhuhu, well how about this?
If you make it further than me in this tournament, I’ll show you my softer side afterwards,” then she lets go my hand and steps back, turning around and finally noticing her changed clothes.
“Hueh?” a flat-footed noise of confusion comes out, looking down at herself and reaching to grab at her new bridal skirt.
Fuck, this is the worst!
Not even looking back at Kaori and Saeko, I (awkwardly, hunched over) hustle towards the table set up for drawing bracket numbers.
Only to be met with an absolutely frigid reception.
Rias and Akeno are both looking at me with expressions of such disgust I’ve never seen on their faces before.
“You look like you were having fun, Jiro-kun,” Akeno says frostily, her eyes slitted almost shut and her lips turned up into a barren smile.
“I see you and that fallen angel have patched things up nicely,” Rias agrees in a tone of voice straight from the arctic, crossing her arms and not even hiding her glare behind a fake smile.
“… I tried to warn him,” Sitri says from a bit off to the side, not quite as angry seeming as my two classmates, but I can definitely feel the disappointment in her voice.
“I can’t help these things, they just happen!” I offer what pathetic defence I can even while Nanael and friends are suddenly clustering around Mittelt to question her.
“Just gimme my number!” That storage shed is looking a lot more comforting by the second as I twist the wheel and with a ker-plunk noise a ball rolls out of it with my fate.
Number nine, great, whatever.
Akeno writes my name down on the board listing the pairings for the first brackets while I just flee off to the corner of the gym, burning under the looks I’m getting.
If nothing else at least Mittelt looks adorably flustered as Nanael badgers her about looking like a blushing bride, but she’s just a victim.
I’m the one taking the blame even if I had no control over what happened.
“If there’s a guiding force behind your power, it definitely has a sense of humour,” Kaori says as she flies on over to join me.
“I hate everything,” I answer, shoulders sinking inwards.
As omens go for the start of the tournament, this is a terrible one.
However at least one person here seems to feel nothing but admiration after such a sight.
“Wow, do you have magic cosplay powers as well as martial arts, Onano-senpai?!” Hyoudou gushes as he comes bounding over with a big grin, looking back over towards Mittelt who’s enduring her own frosty reception at the lottery crank.
“A bride too, that’s so classy!
Could you have put her in a bunnygirl outfit?” If I had control over it, that would be an awesome flex, it’s true.
Before I can come up with some answer, Kaori speaks for me.
“Jiro-kun’s great with clothes, I have him to thank for this as well, isn’t it nice?” she asks, posing in the air in front of the second year boy.
“Arrgh, you even have a sexy fairy familiar!” tears glisten on Hyoudou’s eyes and he clenches his fist while staring at Kaori.
“I thought that handsome bastard Kiba was the one to be jealous of here, but I underestimated your power!” “Yeah… yeah, my power is definitely not one to be underestimated,” I say, feeling a heavy weight upon those words.
Of course I’m not just gonna explain the details to any random person I meet.
Cat’s out of the bag with Rias and Sitri’s groups and I don’t really regret it given my situation at the start, but I don’t want to broadcast the particulars if I can help it.
I’m spared further awkwardness by Shinra announcing that the tournament brackets have been decided and everyone clusters back over to that side of the gym where we can see a board’s been put up.
Because of the numbers there’s two preliminary fights between numbers sixteen to eighteen, the winners of which feed into the first round proper which comprises eight bouts and it progresses straightforwardly from there.
The first prelim is between Kalawarner who I don’t know, and Tomoe Meguri, a second year girl in the student council who I know by name but not really much past that.
Far more interestingly, the second prelim is between Akeno and Shinra.
A duel of the vice presidents!
Battle between two of the most well regarded girls in Kuoh.
A lot of people like to pit them against each other in ‘who’s hotter’ contests (I’d always vote Akeno if anyone asked me, which they never did), but I bet no one ever expected them to be duking it out like this!
“Ara, it seems like we’re going to be settling things early, Tsubaki-san,” Akeno says, a hand on her cheek as she gives Shinra a look not dissimilar to the one she was giving me earlier.
“Please let me apologise in advance for any embarrassment you suffer by losing before the tournament even begins properly,” Shinra says coolly in return.
I can practically see sparks flying between their gazes, this trash talk is great, exactly what you want to see in a supernatural tournament arc!
The winner of that first match will face Hyoudou in the actual first round, while the winner of the second is up against… Saeko?!
Oh man, now I don’t know who to root for.
Ordinarily I’d want Akeno to win this one, but then I’d be in a difficult position for the next fight.
Not to mention I’d already thought a fight between Saeko and Shinra would be amazing to see.
It’s a dilemma!
As for the rest of the brackets, I’m fighting in the first match of the first round, against Reya Kusaka.
Another member of the student council and a second year.
Cute girl, we’ve literally never said two words to each other.
Still I look towards her and see her giving me a fierce look back, her face framed with brown hair that falls in twin braids down her back.
I just give her an awkward sort of smile and nod back, it’s hard to trash talk someone when you know basically nothing about them, and it’s not like I have a grudge against her.
“I’m not going to marry you even if you win, Onano-senpai!
It doesn’t work like that!” What the fuck was she thinking?!
“I never asked!” I blurt out, mortified.
“You need to defeat him, senpai.
For women everywhere,” Toujou says with a somehow accusing look on her blank expression directed at me as she steps up next to the student council girl.
I just grumble and look back at the board rather than engaging further, there’s nothing useful I can say in the face of this madness.
Speaking of Toujou though, the second fight is between her and Kaori.
That’s gonna be a messy one.
After that it’s Kiba versus Mittelt.
I’ve no idea what either’s actually capable of so who knows how that’ll go?
Then it’s Nanael against Raynare, and a battle of the student council with Ruruka Nimura against Momo Hanakai.
I think Hanakai’s the hotter of the two, so I’m gonna root for her on that one.
Lastly there’s Dohnaseek versus Tsubasa Yura.
I’ll root for Yura since I don’t know who Dohnaseek is.
After everyone’s had a chance to take in the brackets, Sitri makes her announcement.
“The first match between Kalawarner-san and Meguri-san will begin at ten o’clock in fifteen minutes.
Everyone should retire to their team’s assigned areas, Nanael-san has agreed to place magic crystals in each room which will broadcast the matches so we’ll all be able to watch without risk of being caught by stray attacks.” Hyoudou gives the tall woman with hair a darker shade of blue than Nanael’s an encouraging cheer while the rest of her party seems rather apathetic, and Meguri gets some pep from her student council colleagues.
Since I don’t know either of them I stay out of it and instead head to the storage shed outside the gym, Kaori still with me and soon joined once more by Saeko.
“I won’t say anything,” she says, which makes me appreciate her all the more, “But I did hear a lot of other people say things.
I’m sorry, Jiro-kun.” “Yeah… that was a bad one,” I just agree, opening the door into the rather dour blockhouse that even Kuoh’s generally classy aesthetic can’t really do much for.
It looks like a concrete bunker you’d put on a beach to resist an invading army, the inside full of things like gym mats, hurdles, pommel horse, springboards, posts, balls from basket to soccer, all the kinds of things you’d need to give a bunch of teenagers a well rounded physical education.
No actual seats or any amenities like that of course, but the gym mats are piled up to a level that it’s not really that bad to sit on them, even if it kind of smells from accumulated years of sweat.
Still, there is something to it I guess, it’s kind of a stereotypical location for a secret hook up, and I’m here with two hot girls.
Sadly I’m not going to be railing Saeko across the gym mats any time soon, but all the same it’s a location that inspires thoughts of the prospect.
We don’t have long to settle in before our gloomy surroundings are lit up by Nanael coming through the door.
Like she’s actually glowing, it’s the kind of thing you don’t notice when she’s in direct light but in here she stands out like an LED.
“Alright, so this is Team Jiro, huh?” she asks, looking over the three of us.
“I don’t know anything about you other than what that one did to Loligoth,” she points directly at me as if there was any doubt.
Then her hand cups her chin as she gives us a scrutinising look before pointing at us from left to right.
“Demonfey Temptress.
Half-Orc Bandit.
Revenge Seeking Ronin.” “Excuse me?” Saeko asks in as piqued a tone as I’ve ever heard from her.
“Why am I a half-orc?” I protest, before realising the rest is just as bad, “Why am I a bandit?!” “I don’t mind my one,” Kaori says cheerfully.
“Everyone needs a good title when they’re announced before a match,” Nanael says, waving a dismissive hand over our objections.
“I don’t know anything about you three so I had to go with my instincts, if you have a better one let’s hear it.” Shit, I need to come up with something good fast before I’m announced to the world as Jiro the Half-Orc Bandit.
This is even worse than when I came up with my company name, I definitely don’t want any dick jokes in this one.
“Unfettered Samurai,” Saeko on the other hand only takes a second to come up with her own alternative.
“That one’s pretty good, I can use it,” Nanael agrees, dismissing us for a moment while I’m thinking as she lets out a grunt and produces a big silvery orb out of thin air, hefting it in her hands before she lets go and it simply hovers in place.
“This’ll broadcast the fights so you can watch.
Last chance, pig boy,” she taunts me with the kind of grin on her face that does not belong on an angel, her hand atop the crystal and some glowy connection forming between them.
Fuck, fuck.
What’s a good title?
What do I want people to hear before I make my debut in the world of supernatural combat?
“Uhh…” shit, my head is completely blank, I didn’t have any time to come up with something good.
Something based on my abilities.
Sub Zero Shinobi?
Kung Fu Scientist?
Doctor of Miracles?
Uh… “Demon King of Sixth Heaven!” Fuck, it’s already a title I have to use in that cringy chant, why not try to own it?
“Hahaha, I’m not calling you that!” Nanael just laughs at me and turns, effortlessly floating out of the shed as easily as she’d entered.
“Maybe you can at least be a chivalrous bandit?” Saeko offers supportively into the depressed silence that ensues.