“You don’t need to say sorry; I’m the one who should be apologizing.”
Hua Yanqiu remained standing in the distance. She had to admit that seeing Shen Manyu in such a state caused a wave of regret to crash heavily against her heart.
Shen Manyu had clearly stated long ago that she was homophobic. However, from her own perspective, Hua Yanqiu had seen that Shen Manyu didn’t seem to reject her presence, leading her to arrogantly assume that Shen Manyu was simply being duplicitous.
So arrogant, so high and mighty—relying solely on her subjective judgment, she had so easily passed a final verdict on Shen Manyu.
This was her mistake, a fault she could never escape.
“It’s okay, it wasn’t your fault either,” Shen Manyu said, lightly raising her hand to carefully wipe away the tears at the corners of her eyes.
She didn’t seem to have fully recovered from the scene yet. When she looked toward Hua Yanqiu, her gaze instinctively dropped a bit, avoiding direct eye contact.
Seeing this, Sister Qi took two steps closer. Noticing that Shen Manyu didn’t show any signs of rejection, she handed her a pack of tissues.
“Thank you.” Shen Manyu took them and gave her a faint smile.
This time, the smile seemed completely genuine and moving, without a hint of negativity. It was hard to pinpoint exactly why it was beautiful, but it was exceptionally so.
Sister Qi dithered for a moment, thinking to herself: If this is the Shen Manyu that Hua Yanqiu fell for, it doesn’t seem so hard to understand.
She found herself less and less able to see through Shen Manyu—or perhaps, it was for this very reason that Hua Yanqiu couldn’t let go of her interest.
If the Shen Manyu of the past was a brainless, selfish fool, her current “level” was many times higher. Correspondingly, her thoughts were buried deeper. They could no longer understand Shen Manyu’s intentions.
They knew that Shen Manyu’s deliberate approach to Hua Yanqiu must have a purpose. Yet, even knowing she harbored ill intentions, they couldn’t bring themselves to simply push her away.
At this thought, Sister Qi was suddenly startled. In the past, she would have immediately become vigilant and urged Hua Yanqiu to stay away to avoid being manipulated by such a calculating person.
Yet now, she was watching with her own eyes as Hua Yanqiu sank deeper and deeper, without any intention of strongly intervening.
When did her vigilance become so weak?
Sister Qi felt there was something “wicked” about Shen Manyu, but despite her thoughts, she couldn’t muster much genuine dislike for her.
If even she felt this way, it was even more so for Hua Yanqiu.
Hua Yanqiu watched Shen Manyu quietly as she slowly and methodically wiped the tears from her cheeks and eyes. Her movements were unhurried, slow, and meticulous.
She wondered what memories this scene had unearthed for Shen Manyu. Her expression was slightly dazed, a faint shadow lingered between her brows, and the corners of her mouth were turned down slightly, her face revealing a touch of imperceptible indifference.
Every movement was clear and organized; there wasn’t a hint of pathetic desperation. Reason constrained the intense emotions surging in her heart, allowing only a small portion to show on the surface.
In that moment, Hua Yanqiu suddenly realized that she and Shen Manyu were actually the same kind of person.
Even though their personalities appeared worlds apart on the surface, they were both fundamentally rational and restrained people.
People like this do not simply choose to flee when faced with difficulties.
Just as this thought crossed Hua Yanqiu’s mind, Shen Manyu finished wiping her tears and slowly raised her head to look in her direction.
This time, she seemed to have built up enough mental fortitude. Her gaze was slow but steady, without any hint of avoidance.
When those tear-streaked eyes met Hua Yanqiu’s, the crystal-clear orbs sparkled like stars in the sunlight. It immediately reminded Hua Yanqiu of the most vibrant light at the moment a firework explodes.
Though the extreme brilliance was like a night-blooming cereus—fleeting and gone in an instant—that most beautiful moment remained fixed on the retina, branded into the mind, unforgettable for a long time.
She was so full of life, frank and firm; extreme beauty and extreme desolation together composed a symphony of life’s rise and fall.
In that brief moment of eye contact, Hua Yanqiu clearly heard the thumping of her own heart. Flustered and hurried.
She heard the sound of a flower blooming in her own heart.
Shen Manyu spoke with apology, “Senior Hua, I’m sorry. It’s my fault for not being able to adjust in time. It won’t happen again next time.”
She no longer called Hua Yanqiu by her name as she had before. It was as if she had sensed something and was deliberately trying to distance herself from Hua Yanqiu.
Hua Yanqiu closed her eyes. She wanted to say something, but felt that words were so pale and powerless; for a moment, she didn’t know what else she could possibly say.
She wanted to tell her not to be so formal and polite—it made one’s heart feel stifled. She wanted to ask why she couldn’t just call her name cheerfully and happily like before.
A heart full of annoyance filled her mind; for the first time, Hua Yanqiu felt such a deep sense of regret.
But even if she could do it all over again…
She had only been acting according to the character’s setting in the script, and had even restrained herself the entire time, without making any transgressive moves outside of the script.
Shen Manyu understood her consideration and her gentlemanly nature; she understood even more the noble character that was deeply ingrained in her bones.
Hua Yanqiu was a proud person. She would never stoop to something as low as taking advantage of someone when there had been no tacit progress in their relationship.
Therefore, her reaction just now had been a bit excessive—it was even an unfair displacement of anger toward Hua Yanqiu.
Consequently, as she gradually calmed down, she couldn’t help but feel a sense of guilt toward Hua Yanqiu: “Don’t worry, I will adjust as quickly as possible. Once filming officially begins, I won’t let my personal reasons delay the progress of the entire crew.”
“If there is another opportunity to rehearse with you…”
The ice on Hua Yanqiu’s face quietly melted. Although there were still no obvious emotional fluctuations, the ripples in her eyes were incredibly soft as she said gently, “You can come find me anytime.”
Shen Manyu’s lips curled slightly. She gazed at her without blinking as all heavy thoughts left her. Following her instincts, she gave Hua Yanqiu a relieved and lighthearted smile.
“Thank you!”
She took back her script. Sister Qi made way for her and opened the door. Shen Manyu thanked them both once more and, under their complex gazes, returned to her own room with poise.
The room was empty. The curtains had excellent shading; as soon as the door was closed, the entire room became so dark one couldn’t see their own hand in front of their face.
Darkness seemed to be the best camouflage. Being in the dark might cause anxiety or fear for others, but as Shen Manyu merged into the shadows, the ubiquitous feeling of being watched gradually faded away.
Darkness was the source of her sense of security. Only in the dark could she find a moment of respite.
She leaned her back against the door, thinking of nothing. Every expression she had worn earlier seemed like a mask. Now, the mask was peeled off by its owner; the habitually curved corners of her mouth flattened, and her pupils almost dissolved into the night. All flirtatiousness and charm vanished, leaving only extreme coldness and indifference on her face.
Her arm trembled uncontrollably, unable to hold the script. The thick stack of paper slipped from her fingertips and fell heavily to the floor.
She didn’t look down, nor did she squat to pick it up. She felt weary and powerless, her heart filled with dejection. Her spine slid down the door until she was sitting on the floor.
The air conditioning in the room wasn’t on. The darkness was engulfed by a stifling heat and irritability. Sweat broke out on Shen Manyu’s forehead, and her body felt lazy; she didn’t want to move at all.
The phone screen lit up for a moment, and the short notification sound felt like a shock to the heart.
Light leaked from her pocket. Shen Manyu rested the back of her head against the door, her eyes lightly closed, sitting quietly and indifferently.
There was a pause on the other end before a second notification sounded.
The person on the other side seemed to be waiting for Shen Manyu’s reply. The notifications were very regular, sounding once every few moments.
However, unlike the string of urgent, frantic messages Jing Yanqing used to send in a fit of rage, these notifications were unhurried, fully displaying the patience of the person on the other side.
At a moment like this, besides Hua Yanqiu, it seemed there was no one else who would message her.
Shen Manyu lightly pressed her hand against her chest. Her palm could clearly feel the rapid heartbeat—thump after thump, the strong vibrations causing her entire chest cavity to ache with a swollen intensity.
Did she hate Hua Yanqiu?
Shen Manyu couldn’t help but ask herself.