The clingy possessiveness packed tightly beneath Kwon Dajung’s sweet, coaxing tone was impossible to miss.
Yoon Gyujin casually reached over and ruffled his hair.
“Dajung, you’re here?”
Kwon Dajung only smiled at the rough, familiar gesture, as if Yoon Gyujin were petting a dog he had raised himself.
What could he say? It was a habit.
Whenever he looked at Kwon Dajung, he naturally felt like reaching out and petting him.
I really am hopeless.
He had already told Kwon Dajung they should break up. He knew he probably shouldn’t keep acting like this afterward.
He understood that perfectly well in his head.
Even so, despite genuinely trying to put some distance between them, it was far from easy.
They had spent five years practically joined at the hip. How was he supposed to start living like complete strangers overnight?
A bitter smile spread across Yoon Gyujin’s lips.
How did my life suddenly become this brutal? Just a few days ago, it was still relatively normal…
“You don’t have any field assignments today, right?”
Kwon Dajung had already taken the seat beside him and asked in an endearingly sweet tone.
Yoon Gyujin answered absentmindedly.
“No. I probably won’t have any for a while.”
He had rearranged everything—field work, office work, overtime, his entire work schedule—so he would have plenty of free time for the foreseeable future.
He had also asked other Guides to handle the guiding for Special Operations Team 1.
Ever since Director Yoon Palsik had learned about the pregnancy, he had been taking better care of Yoon Gyujin than the actual father of the baby.
He rearranged Yoon Gyujin’s schedule, bought him food that was supposed to be good during pregnancy, and even paid for supplements out of his own pocket, sending something over practically every other day.
The funny part was that he did all of that while constantly pressuring Yoon Gyujin to terminate the pregnancy as soon as possible.
If this hadn’t been such an unusual case that surgery was difficult for the time being, Yoon Gyujin might already have been dragged straight into a hospital room by Yoon Palsik himself.
That was how adamant the director was about it.
Yoon Gyujin understood where he was coming from.
It wasn’t arrogance to say that he was one of the indispensable members of the Guide Center.
He was the irreplaceable Guide responsible for managing the four Espers of Special Operations Team 1, a team notorious for being “where they dumped all the rejects.”
From Yoon Palsik’s perspective, it made perfect sense that he couldn’t afford to let him go.
And what if I risk giving birth and something goes wrong? What if I die?
According to Yoon Palsik, that would be nothing short of a loss to humanity.
His concerns had also included the identity of the baby’s father.
In fact, the very first thing he had said after regaining consciousness at the hospital had been—
“What are you going to do if the baby takes after its father?!”
What am I supposed to do? If the baby takes after its father, it’ll probably be beautiful.
That had been Yoon Gyujin’s completely vacant thought at the time.
Then again, he had still been half out of his mind from the shocking news himself.
The father could only be Kwon Dajung, and if the baby resembled him, then at least its looks would undoubtedly be exceptional.
There was no denying that Kwon Dajung was ridiculously beautiful.
The commonly accepted theory was that when God created him, He had poured every last ounce of effort and devotion into his appearance, then gotten so exhausted that He made his personality absolutely fucking awful.
Yoon Gyujin wholeheartedly agreed.
So if the baby takes after Kwon Dajung, it’ll definitely be beautiful. As for its personality…
Well. I’ll just have to teach it properly.
It wasn’t as though he had never done it before.
He had spent five whole years with Kwon Dajung, from the time Kwon Dajung entered the Center at nineteen until now.
The thought of going through all of that again was a little dizzying, but at least experience had taught him that with enough effort, a terrible personality could be corrected.
There was no reason to be afraid before he had even tried.
That confidence had a great deal to do with the fact that Yoon Gyujin was already leaning toward keeping the baby.
Yoon Palsik was firmly against it.
His doctor had also advised him that it would be better not to give birth if possible.
And above all, Kwon Dajung, the baby’s father, had never once said he wanted a child.
Even so…
If it’s born, then it’ll be my family.
People said there was no bond in the world stronger than the one between parent and child.
They said having a child could bring a person an incredible kind of happiness.
Yoon Gyujin had lost his parents when he was young and had lived alone ever since.
Maybe that’s why I’m so attached to the idea of family.
No. That has to be the reason.
After becoming a Guide, and especially after meeting Kwon Dajung, he had accepted that children simply weren’t part of his future.
He had given up on the idea.
And now, somehow, a child had come to him like a miracle.
How could I possibly give that up so easily?
That was also why he had brought up breaking up with Kwon Dajung despite knowing perfectly well that the reaction would be bad.
Part of it was because he couldn’t guide him for the time being, but if he did decide to have the baby, then taking time away from work would be the right thing to do.
Yoon Gyujin had taken all of that into account and tried to sort everything out by himself.
“Gyujin, this has been hurting since this morning.”
Kwon Dajung whined and pointed at his chest.
Pulled abruptly out of his thoughts, Yoon Gyujin looked him over.
“Where?”
“Right here. But I feel like it might get better if you guide me…”
As he whispered, Kwon Dajung smoothly laced their fingers together.
Of course he wasn’t actually in pain.
Yoon Gyujin knew perfectly well that this was just an excuse to ask for physical contact under the pretense of guiding.
Normally, he would have given in to that kind of coaxing and guided him.
Not today.
The doctor’s warning was still echoing ominously in his head like a curse.
“No guiding until you reach twelve weeks. Since we suspect this pregnancy may be a side effect of guiding dependency syndrome, guiding could be extremely dangerous for both the fetus and for you. Especially for the mother—no, that’s not quite right. The pregnant patient—well, whatever. The point is, it’s not good.”
I could take the risk with my own body, but if it could hurt the baby, that’s different.
I just can’t guide until twelve weeks.
Yoon Gyujin stood and picked up his glass.
He quickly turned his head away from Kwon Dajung, who was staring at him with wide eyes.
“Go to the Guide Center and ask whichever Guide is available.”
I’m leaving.
With only one thought in mind—I need to get away before Kwon Dajung says anything else—Yoon Gyujin walked away almost at a run.
He set his glass on the return counter and had just pushed open the café door when he caught a familiar scent behind him.
“Gyujin, did I do something wrong?”
An arm wrapped around his waist and pulled him sharply backward.
Kwon Dajung held him tight, making sure he couldn’t escape.
Startled, Yoon Gyujin turned his head.
One look at his face told him everything.
He’s fucking furious.
Cold eyes stared straight into him.
Kwon Dajung had been like this that morning too, but at least then he had pretended to behave.
Now he looked one step away from becoming completely unhinged.
If refusing to guide him once leads to this, what the hell am I supposed to do from now on?
“Are you angry with me? Is that what this is? Do you hate me that fucking much? Is that why you’re saying all that bullshit about quitting and refusing to guide me too?”
“Bullshit…?”
“Then what the fuck is it? Why are you treating me like this, Gyujin?”
Does he think he can say everything in a threatening tone and then make it okay by turning sweet at the end?
Yoon Gyujin let out a tired sigh.
He patted the back of Kwon Dajung’s hand where it was wrapped around his waist.
“It’s not like that, so let go for a second.”
“No.”
Kwon Dajung tightened his hold deliberately.
“If I let go, you’re just going to run away. You think I don’t know that?”
His arms squeezed even tighter.
Yoon Gyujin’s breath caught.
He immediately gestured in alarm.
“Hey, wait. You’re squeezing my stomach. Let go for a second.”
Of all places, Kwon Dajung had wrapped his arms tightly around his abdomen.
It probably isn’t enough to hurt the baby, but still. What if something happens?
“My body hurts because of you. My heart hurts because of you. My head hurts because of you. There isn’t a single part of me that doesn’t hurt. My mental state is in pieces, so now I can’t even work. How am I supposed to go in like this? If I lose control, it’ll be your fault. Then you’ll go to prison too.”
“Stop talking nonsense about prison and let go first.”
Yoon Gyujin let Kwon Dajung’s rambling go in one ear and out the other as he focused on getting free.
Kwon Dajung looked deeply unhappy about it, but when Yoon Gyujin told him to stop, he did actually listen.
Yoon Gyujin swallowed another sigh as he looked at him.
Kwon Dajung remained planted firmly at his side as if he had no intention whatsoever of backing down.
Then he raised an eyebrow, silently demanding an explanation.
After a long exchange of wordless looks, Yoon Gyujin finally surrendered.
“…Fine. You want guiding, right? I’ll do it. We’ll go to a guiding room.”
The doctor had explicitly warned him not to.
He had been told it could be dangerous for the baby and bad for his own body as well.
Still—
Would doing it just once really cause anything serious?
More than anything, with Kwon Dajung clinging to him this desperately, it was hard to keep saying no.
This is exactly why I tried to quit.
If I stay near Kwon Dajung, I already know how this is going to end. I’ll keep getting dragged along until I give in.
I can never beat him.
As he walked ahead, Yoon Gyujin rubbed his forehead.
If there have to be side effects, I wish they’d happen to me instead of the baby.
Do I just have to leave that to chance too?
Unlike the gloomy Yoon Gyujin, Kwon Dajung looked utterly delighted.
He slung an arm around Yoon Gyujin’s shoulders and smiled brightly, as though he hadn’t been threatening him moments earlier.
Even those dramatic emotional swings over a little physical contact had become thoroughly familiar to Yoon Gyujin.
The guiding rooms were only one floor above the café.
They walked down the corridor past a long row of doors until they found an empty room.
Yoon Gyujin placed his hand against the fingerprint scanner.
There was a click as the door unlocked, followed by a recorded announcement.
— Guiding Room 211 is now open. Authorization code DS3844.
— Please observe all guiding regulations. First, refrain from inappropriate physical contact. Second, Espers must comply with all instructions given by the Guide. Third, the use of abilities inside the guiding room is prohibited. Fourth, all activity within the guiding room is recorded and monitored in real time—
“Sit.”
Yoon Gyujin nodded toward the recliner in the center of the room.
He pulled a simple chair over beside it and called to Kwon Dajung, who was still standing near the entrance.
“But we’re keeping it short today.”
Kwon Dajung hurried over with a pleased, almost bashful expression and immediately settled into the recliner.
He pressed a button to lower the backrest, then held out his hand.
Yoon Gyujin gave a faint snort of amusement and took Kwon Dajung by the wrist.
“I’m starting.”
From here on, all I can do is leave it to chance.
Feeling the steady pulse beneath his fingertips, as though he were taking Kwon Dajung’s pulse, Yoon Gyujin lowered his eyes.
He had been guiding for twenty years.
By now, it was as natural to him as breathing.
An invisible current flowed from his hand.
Kwon Dajung’s familiar warmth spread through their joined hands, and Yoon Gyujin’s energy followed the path worn smooth over five years of daily contact.
Then, in the very next instant, Yoon Gyujin lost consciousness.