Arjun Mehra spent the next ten minutes trying to convince himself that he had not just acquired five hundred years of cultivation.
Unfortunately, reality disagreed.
He stood alone in the maintenance corridor behind the panda enclosure, staring at his right hand.
Then he clenched it.
A sharp cracking sound echoed through the air.
Not from his fingers.
From the concrete wall beside him.
A spiderweb of fractures spread across the surface.
Arjun froze.
The wall froze.
Even the pigeon sitting on the nearby trash can seemed to freeze.
Slowly, very slowly, Arjun looked at his fist.
Then he looked at the wall again.
“That wasn’t me.”
The system answered immediately.
HOST HAS SUCCESSFULLY ABSORBED 500 YEARS OF CULTIVATION.
CURRENT SURVIVAL PROBABILITY HAS INCREASED FROM 0.000000001% TO 0.00000001%.
“That’s not reassuring.”
THE NINE HEAVENS DEMON REALM IS EXTREMELY DANGEROUS.
“I’m standing behind a panda enclosure!”
PRECISELY.
Arjun considered smashing his head against the wall.
Then he remembered that he might accidentally destroy the wall.
Or the building.
Or possibly himself.
He wasn’t entirely sure how cultivation worked.
Which was a sentence he never thought he would have to say.
A sudden vibration in his pocket startled him.
His phone.
He pulled it out and stared at the screen.
BANK BALANCE: ₹2,341
At least one thing in his life remained painfully normal.
His landlord had already called twice this week.
His motorcycle needed repairs.
And now there was apparently a voice in his head that believed his workplace was a demon realm.
Fantastic.
A familiar chewing sound interrupted his thoughts.
Crunch.
Crunch.
Crunch.
Arjun slowly turned around.
Bruno was sitting less than three meters away, happily devouring another bundle of bamboo.
He had no idea how the panda had escaped the enclosure again.
Frankly, Arjun no longer had the emotional energy to care.
“Bruno,” he said.
The panda looked up.
“Are you an ancient demon emperor?”
Bruno blinked.
Then he sneezed.
A piece of bamboo hit Arjun’s shoe.
“Yeah,” Arjun sighed.
“That’s about what I expected.”
The system suddenly activated.
WARNING!
THE HEAVENLY BEAR EMPEROR HAS INITIATED COMMUNICATION.
“…What?”
HOST MUST RESPOND APPROPRIATELY.
“He sneezed!”
ANCIENT DEMON LANGUAGE IS COMPLEX.
Arjun stared into the void for several seconds.
Then he made a decision.
If his brain had truly broken, he might as well cooperate with the hallucination.
He looked at Bruno.
“Greetings, Great Bear Emperor.”
Bruno scratched his ear.
“I appreciate your mercy in not killing me.”
Bruno yawned.
“I humbly request peaceful relations between our species.”
Bruno rolled onto his back.
Silence.
Then every notification in Arjun’s vision exploded at once.
SPECIAL MISSION COMPLETED!
Successfully Negotiated Peace with the Heavenly Bear Emperor Evaluation:
PERFECT
Rewards:
Beast Language Mastery
Heavenly Beast Affinity
300 Years of Cultivation
One Random Divine Skill
“Wait—”
A golden light erupted inside his body.
Arjun felt as though he had been struck by lightning.
The world suddenly became sharper.
The wind.
The sunlight.
The heartbeat inside his chest.
Everything.
At the same time, information flooded his brain.
Instinct.
Knowledge.
Languages.
Thousands of sounds he had never understood before suddenly became crystal clear.
He heard chirping nearby.
A sparrow sat on the fence.
“…The human looks stupid,” the sparrow said.
Arjun blinked.
The sparrow blinked.
Then it flew away.
A monkey screamed somewhere in the distance.
“STEAL THE BANANAS!”
Another monkey screamed back.
“NO!
WE STEAL THE TOURISTS!”
Arjun felt his soul leave his body for the second time that morning.
“No.”
Bruno looked at him.
The panda opened his mouth.
“More bamboo.”
Arjun froze.
The panda froze.
The universe froze.
“You can talk?”
Bruno tilted his head.
“No.”
“What?”
“No bamboo.”
Arjun stared.
Bruno stared.
Then the panda resumed eating.
For the first time in his life, Arjun genuinely considered quitting his job.
A loud voice echoed across the zoo.
“Everyone!
Emergency meeting!”
Director Wang.
Arjun groaned.
The system screamed.
WARNING!
THE HIDDEN IMMORTAL PATRIARCH IS SUMMONING THE SECT ELDERS!
“No, he’s calling a staff meeting!”
THIS IS CLEARLY A CULTIVATION ASSEMBLY.
Before Arjun could argue, his feet had already begun moving.
The employee break room was crowded.
About fifteen staff members sat around folding tables.
Caretakers.
Veterinarians.
Security guards.
Janitors.
Completely normal people.
At least, they had been normal ten minutes ago.
Now Arjun wasn’t so sure.
The system scanned the room.
Then it panicked.
WARNING!
MULTIPLE HIGH-LEVEL EXPERTS DETECTED!
Arjun’s eye twitched.
The system highlighted a fifty-year-old janitor.
ANCIENT SWEEPING SAGE.
A security guard.
HEAVENLY SPEAR KING.
The receptionist.
THOUSAND ILLUSION FAIRY.
Arjun sat down before he fainted.
Director Wang entered the room carrying a folder.
The system nearly exploded.
WARNING!
WARNING!
HIDDEN IMMORTAL PATRIARCH APPROACHING!
Director Wang cleared his throat.
“Good morning.”
Nobody answered.
Mostly because nobody liked meetings.
Arjun understood.
If he hadn’t just discovered that his coworkers might secretly be immortal cultivators, he probably wouldn’t have answered either.
Director Wang sighed.
“We have an important announcement.”
The room became quiet.
“Today, representatives from Kapoor Wildlife Corporation will be visiting the zoo.”
Several employees exchanged glances.
Kapoor Wildlife Corporation was one of the largest wildlife organizations in the country.
Rumors had circulated for months that they intended to buy Green Paradise Zoo.
Director Wang continued.
“The lead representative will be arriving this afternoon.”
The door suddenly opened.
Everyone turned.
And Arjun forgot how breathing worked.
A young woman walked into the room.
Long black hair.
Sharp hazel eyes.
A white shirt beneath a fitted blazer.
Confident.
Elegant.
Beautiful.
She looked around the room calmly.
Then her gaze stopped on Arjun.
For some reason, his heart skipped a beat.
The system completely lost its mind.
WARNING!
WARNING!
WARNING!
The entire world turned red.
ANCIENT EXISTENCE DETECTED!
Arjun nearly fell out of his chair.
“What now?!”
NAME: UNKNOWN
TITLE: NINE-TAILED CELESTIAL FOX PRINCESS
STATUS: SEALED
THREAT LEVEL: CATASTROPHIC
“…No.”
HOST SURVIVAL PROBABILITY: 0.0000000001%
“No!”
The woman walked forward and extended her hand.
“Hello.
I’m Aisha Kapoor.”
Arjun stared at her hand.
Then at her face.
Then back at the hand.
She raised an eyebrow.
“Are you alright?”
“No.”
The answer escaped before he could stop it.
The room fell silent.
Aisha blinked.
Director Wang looked embarrassed.
Someone coughed.
Arjun wanted to die.
The system interrupted.
EMERGENCY MYTHICAL QUEST
Escort the Nine-Tailed Celestial Fox Princess safely through the Demon Realm.
Failure:
Death.
Success Rewards:
Chaos Heavenly Eyes
Thousand Years of Cultivation
Divine Artifact
Mystery Reward
Arjun looked at the quest.
Then at Aisha.
Then at the quest again.
She smiled politely.
Unfortunately, according to the voice inside his head, that smile belonged to one of the most dangerous beings in existence.
“Mr.
Mehra?” she asked.
“Yes?”
“I was hoping you could show me around the zoo.”
The system began playing funeral music.
Not metaphorical funeral music.
Actual funeral music.
Arjun closed his eyes.
Of course.
Of course the ancient fox princess wanted a private tour.
And of course refusing would probably trigger another mission.
When he finally opened his eyes, he managed a weak smile.
“Sure.”
Aisha smiled.
Director Wang smiled.
Everyone smiled.
Only Arjun knew that he had just accepted what was, according to his system, a suicide mission.
And somehow, he had a feeling that this was only the beginning of his problems.
To Be Continue….