Morgause’s message turned out to be considerably less romantic than I had hoped.
Which, to be fair, was probably my fault for spending the entire walk back to the guild imagining that it might be a private invitation.
Maybe dinner.
Maybe dinner followed by something that required locking the door.
Instead, the Guild Master spread several documents across the table and said:
“We have a problem.”
All five of us were gathered in the same room again.
Monkar had returned to his armchair. Elizabeth remained standing, apparently incapable of sitting still for long after a fight. Sogard had settled near one of the windows, while Blazer occupied the chair beside me.
I was staring at Morgause’s seal on one of the documents.
Very pretty.
Elegant.
She had probably touched it herself.
“Nellie.”
I blinked.
Blazer was looking at me.
“Are you listening?”
“Perfectly.”
I was not listening.
The Guild Master continued before Blazer could test me.
“Over the last several days, we’ve received reports of monster attacks in areas where those creatures normally wouldn’t appear. Monsters abandoning their usual territories, becoming far more aggressive than normal, and displaying abnormal levels of endurance.”
That got my attention.
“Like the troll?”
“Exactly.”
Elizabeth crossed her arms.
“And what does Morgause have to do with it?”
The Guild Master pointed to the document bearing her seal.
“The Demon Queen reported similar incidents along the routes near her territory. Apparently, several monsters began behaving strangely after a caravan coming from demon lands suffered an accident.”
Blazer leaned forward.
“What was it carrying?”
“That’s part of the problem. The report only describes it as material intended for internal use at the castle.”
A little disappointing.
I had hoped Morgause had written something more interesting.
Maybe Nellie, come immediately.
Or Nellie, I’ve given your proposal serious thought and decided perhaps we should try the bed idea.
I knew I needed to stop writing imaginary letters from Morgause in my head.
I wasn’t going to.
The Guild Master placed a small glass container on the table.
Inside were several black seeds.
Or at least they looked like seeds.
“We found these between the troll’s teeth.”
Sogard approached first.
“It was eating them?”
“That’s what we believe.”
Elizabeth picked up the container and held it toward the light.
“Poison?”
“None of our alchemists recognize it.”
Monkar studied the contents from his seat.
“Smells roasted.”
Everyone looked at him.
The Guild Master frowned.
“How can you tell from over there?”
Monkar shrugged.
“Good nose.”
Elizabeth loosened the lid slightly.
Sogard immediately pushed her hand away.
“If the alchemists don’t know what it is, perhaps you shouldn’t inhale it.”
“I wasn’t inhaling it.”
“You were bringing it toward your face.”
“That’s called smelling.”
“Do you see why we normally don’t compete with unidentified substances?”
She gave him a look that strongly suggested another argument was about to begin.
Blazer took the container before it could.
He studied the seeds for a few seconds.
“So our mission is to find out what they are.”
“And where they came from,” the Guild Master added. “The troll followed roughly the same route where the caravan accident occurred. If these seeds were part of the cargo, there’s a chance other creatures consumed them as well.”
That would explain quite a bit.
It would also explain why Morgause had sent the message.
Probably.
Though a very small and extremely optimistic part of me still wanted to believe she had used the opportunity to indirectly ask about me.
The Guild Master unfolded a map.
“I want the five of you to investigate the route. Start here and move east until you find either the remains of the caravan or some sign of the missing cargo.”
Elizabeth pointed to a section of the road.
“We can cover more ground if we split up.”
“Bad idea,” Blazer said. “We still don’t know what else ate those things.”
“That’s exactly why splitting up would be faster.”
“Fast doesn’t mean smart.”
“You should understand that better than anyone.”
Blazer smiled.
“I’m touched that after all these years, you’re still trying to hurt my feelings.”
While they argued, I studied the map.
The marked route led east.
Toward Morgause’s territory.
Toward her castle.
What a wonderfully convenient coincidence.
I raised a hand.
“I can investigate this section.”
Blazer stopped arguing immediately.
He followed my finger across the map.
Then looked at me.
“Of course you can.”
“Is there a problem?”
“None at all. I’m sure your interest is entirely professional.”
The Guild Master seemed satisfied.
“Good. Then Nellie can begin in that area while we organize the rest of the search.”
I nodded with all the seriousness I could manage.
I understood my mission perfectly.
Investigate the strange substance.
Locate the missing cargo.
Discover what was affecting the monsters.
And, since I would already be nearby, visit Morgause.
Preferably after picking up my wine and changing clothes.
Two objectives.
One trip.
Efficiency.
I investigated absolutely nothing on the way there.
To be fair, I looked to both sides of the road a few times.
I saw no trolls.
I considered that part of the investigation complete.
As Morgause’s castle came into view between the mountains, my thoughts steadily abandoned anything related to mysterious seeds.
Attempt number thirty-four.
Now that was important.
I still needed to pick up the red lingerie, but first I could check Morgause’s mood.
If she seemed receptive, I could come back properly prepared.
If she tried to kill me immediately...
Well, I could work with that too.
I found Orbit near one of the side paths leading toward the castle.
He was leaning against a boulder, checking a list written on a piece of parchment.
When he saw me, he smiled.
“You’re back quickly.”
“Official business.”
Orbit raised both eyebrows.
“That’s new.”
“I’m investigating something.”
“That’s even newer.”
I decided to ignore him.
I pulled out one of the black seeds the Guild Master had allowed me to take as a sample.
“Do you recognize this?”
Orbit barely glanced at it.
“Of course.”
I waited.
He went back to his list.
“And?”
“And what?”
“What is it?”
Orbit looked at me as though the answer should have been obvious.
“Coffee.”
I went silent.
I looked at the seed.
Then at Orbit.
“That doesn’t look like coffee.”
“Because it hasn’t been ground yet.”
“I know how coffee works.”
“Then I don’t understand the question.”
I stepped closer.
“Orbit, a troll ate this, crossed part of the region, entered the city, destroyed half a street, and forced all five heroes to fight it.”
Orbit blinked.
“Oh.”
That was not quite the reaction I had expected.
“‘Oh’?”
“So that’s where one of the sacks ended up.”
“One of what sacks?”
“Hellista’s.”
Something inside my head began clicking into place in a way I really didn’t want to accept.
Orbit folded the parchment.
“A shipment of coffee arrived for her yesterday. The wagon lost a wheel near the forest, and three sacks rolled down the slope. We found two.”
I looked at the seed between my fingers again.
“Are you telling me a troll ate the third one?”
“Probably.”
“And that’s why it was like that?”
Orbit nodded with complete seriousness.
“It’s concentrated infernal coffee. Made for demons. It gives you a substantial boost in energy, speeds up mana flow, and in large quantities can cause some aggression.”
“Some?”
“Usually the person drinking it doesn’t try to knock buildings down.”
“Orbit.”
“But normally the person drinking it doesn’t weigh two tons either.”
I pressed one hand against my forehead.
The Five Summoned Heroes.
An emergency summons.
Alchemists studying an unknown substance.
A troll regenerating at a ridiculous speed.
All because of coffee.
“How strong is that stuff?”
Orbit thought for a moment.
“Hellista drinks four cups every morning.”
That didn’t answer my question.
Although, after meeting Hellista, perhaps it did.
I looked back toward the road I had come from.
I could return to the guild.
Explain what happened.
Turn in the evidence.
Report that the great troll mystery had been caused by a demon secretary with a deeply concerning caffeine dependency.
The mission would practically be over.
It was the responsible thing to do.
The logical thing.
The thing any sensible heroine would have done.
Then I looked toward the castle.
I thought about Morgause.
About how completely red her face had become during our last encounter. About her legs. Her waist. The feeling of having her body so close to mine whenever she cornered me.
My imagination immediately went several steps further.
I wanted to kiss her until she forgot why she was supposed to be trying to kill me. I wanted to find out how that proud expression would change if her hands ever moved over me without the intention of slamming me into a wall. I wanted to know how far I could push her before she finally stopped pretending my words had no effect on her.
I imagined her above me.
Then beneath me.
Then I imagined a situation where neither of us was wearing enough clothing for me to care who was where.
I had to close my eyes for a second.
Yes.
I definitely had far too many ideas.
Orbit put away his list.
“You’re making that face again.”
“What face?”
“The one you make right before making a terrible decision involving Her Majesty.”
I looked one last time toward the road back to the city.
I could do my duty.
Or I could go see Morgause.
I thought about it for approximately two seconds.
I slipped the coffee bean into my pocket.
“Orbit.”
“Yes?”
I smiled.
“Attempt thirty-four.”
His smile appeared immediately.
“Wise choice.”
It wasn’t.
But if everything went well, I hoped to be far too busy to regret it.