When I stepped into the funeral hall, the smell of burning incense was the first thing to greet me.
After briefly exchanging greetings with the people inside, I walked a little farther in.
And even when I finally came face to face with the memorial portrait covered in flowers, no tears came.
Because I wasn't someone who had the right to cry.
A woman in mourning clothes clasped my hand firmly and said.
'Seol-han, thank you for coming.'
I'm truly sorry to say it, but her words were hard to understand.
Because I wondered if I wasn't, if anything, the one who deserved to be resented.
When I finished paying my respects and went outside, snow was coming down so hard I couldn't see ahead.
It was as if someone up in the sky were pouring it down resentfully out of grief.
I don't believe in things like gods or souls.
But just this once, I wanted to believe that something like that might really exist.
***
'I fell asleep just like that.'
I slowly opened my eyes. Judging by how quiet it was around me, it didn't seem enough time had passed yet for the other guys to come back to the dorm.
When I turned over to get up,
"You're awake."
Cha Min-seong was beside me.
"When did you get here?"
"Last night."
Last night?
I hurriedly checked the time on the digital clock sitting on the living room table.
It was 10:40 AM.
"What time does your practice start?"
"10."
I'm late.......
A newbie late on his very first day. I can't wait to see how the staff evaluation turns out.
Whether he knew of my anguish or not, Cha Min-seong strolled leisurely toward the kitchen, took a few side-dish containers out of the fridge, and lined them up on the dining table.
Most were seasoned vegetables, but tofu patties and stir-fried sausage and the like were mixed in here and there.
"Eat first."
"Is eating important right now?"
"It is."
The guy retorted flatly, opened the rice cooker, and scooped up a heaping paddle of multigrain rice.
"You've been sleeping since last evening and haven't eaten anything."
Setting a spoon and chopsticks beside the rice bowl, Cha Min-seong beckoned as if telling me to come over.
The only thing laid out on the table was a meal for one.
"What about yours."
"I already ate."
Half suspecting this guy had slipped poison into the food behind my back, I pulled out a chair and sat.
"You even ate breakfast, so why didn't you go to practice?"
"Because you didn't wake up."
"You could've woken me, though?"
"Why bother?"
I'd felt it when I saw him in the practice room too, but unlike his neat, young-master looks, this punk had a way of talking that could really piss a person off. Just because there's no cursing doesn't make it nice speech.
His actions were the same.
Look at him now, leaving me alone at the table while he sits on the living room sofa. I'm grateful he set the table, but normally in a situation like this, wouldn't you sit across from each other and talk?
When we met as reporter and idol, he'd at least seemed to be playing the social game properly. He'd done a good job of keeping a personality like this from invading his public life.
"The team leader said you'd be really tired, so even if you slept a while, not to bother waking you and just leave you be."
"And you actually decided to follow that to the letter."
"Because you actually looked tired. You didn't even budge when the kids were chattering right beside you."
Just then, a small vibration sounded.
Cha Min-seong immediately turned his head and checked his cell phone.
Apparently Solar let trainees use their cell phones when they weren't in training.
"Tell me when you're done eating. We'll go to the company right away."
"Just go ahead. I know the way to the company."
"Do you have a company access card? The team leader said she forgot to give it to you yesterday."
"......."
I have no memory of receiving anything like that. Kim Ji-su must have been really busy, so that'd explain it. She's having a rough time since the start of the year.
I couldn't keep stealing someone's precious time like this, so I emptied my bowl as fast as I could and got up.
"Do the dishes when we get back."
"Yeah, yeah."
After quickly sending the leftover side dishes back into the fridge, I borrowed what was stocked in the dorm to wash my face and brush my teeth quickly, then went out the front door.
Before washing, I asked Cha Min-seong if I could use some shampoo or body wash, and he said almost everything in the bathroom was Namgung Hyun's, so I should ask him.
Still, I couldn't go out without washing, so in the end I used it on the sly. Sorry, Namgung Hyun. I'll buy you all new ones later.
On the way to the company, Cha Min-seong walked ahead without turning his head once.
To top it off, it was that in-between morning hour when nobody was out walking, so only a heavy silence hung in the alley.
Eventually, around the time the company building came into view, I lost to my curiosity and spoke to him first.
"Weren't you the one who didn't like me?"
"Yeah, I don't like you."
What an honest guy.
Normally at a time like this, don't you sugarcoat it a little?
"Then for what reason are you personally escorting me all the way to the practice room? You could've had the other kids do it."
"The other kids have to practice."
Excuse me, do you think that counts as an answer? Don't you practice?
"Unbelievable. And here you were throwing a whole fit, telling me to quit if I had a conscience."
"While you were sleeping, Ha Hyun said you seemed like a good person, so we should watch you a while longer. If so, then even if I don't like you, I should watch for now."
He faithfully carried out my demand that he take my side. I didn't know he'd act on it right away like this, though.
"Thanks so much for trusting me."
"I'm not trusting you. I'm trusting Ha Hyun."
"Ah, is that so."
Cha Min-seong tapped his access card on the security device attached to the wall. Soon, with a short chime, the door into the company opened.
With that last exchange, Cha Min-seong and I didn't open our mouths again the whole way down to the basement practice room.
The stuffy bookworm, who had walked ahead keeping silent all the way to the destination like that, suddenly tossed out a single remark as the practice room came right up in front of us.
"I'm not looking after you like this next time, so wake up on your own."
'Next time,' huh.......
Still, for a newcomer who'd just rolled in from outside, it seems I got off to a pretty decent start.
***
...Should I just die?
"Hyung, are you okay? Are you alive?"
"Oh my, why did such a handsome gentleman go so early~ Seo-jun, go get a white cloth!"
"Hyun-hyung! There's no white cloth, but there's a chroma key cloth. What should I do?"
"Then let's use that. It'll be convenient—we won't have to blur him when we edit the practice room videos. Seol-han-hyungnim~ We'll take responsibility for protecting your cold-handsome image, so go in peace!"
"Hyun, Seol-han-hyung's having a hard time, don't tease him. And Seo-jun, go put the chroma key cloth back in the supply room."
Now I see why their group's name is PLUTO. A bunch of grim reapers with no blood or tears but overflowing with stamina and talent.
After dance class ended, the guys gathered one by one beside me as I lay face-down on the floor and poured out ridicule without a break.
No, actually, the only one pouring out ridicule was Namgung Hyun.
He looked like an angel, but what he did wasn't much different from a devil.
In the chaotic conversation, only Cha Min-seong's voice couldn't be heard.
Judging by the flashy footwork ringing out over there along with the music, it seemed he'd tuned out the younger guys' misdeeds and was diligently doing some leftover practice.
Even in all this, look at how he matches the music beat for beat without a single slip. How is his footwork that clean, with nothing extra?
I shooed away the spectators gathered around me with a wave of my hand as if chasing off flies, then wriggled up and sat leaning against the practice room wall.
For the three hours of dance class that followed right after lunch, I diligently flailed my arms and legs according to the trainer's explanations, but the response I got back was the glorious verdict that I looked like a squid on a grill.
Maybe the workplace I should have been reporting to wasn't a music show stage but a highway rest stop.
Both have music playing and people gathering, so the mix-up was understandable.
I knew the road to an idol debut was rough, but going through it for real, it wasn't something a human being should have to do.
Especially because I was in an emergency where I had to shape up to a pro level in a relatively short time, the trainer's criticism was even more merciless.
Taking a moment's break, I decided to spend some time reviewing just how big the fire that had fallen on my feet was.
The PLUTO debut I knew of was in August this year.
Factoring in the music video shoot date, that meant I had to show rapid enough growth to at least stand side by side with those four within half a year.
At this point, this isn't a fire on my feet—it's a blaze swallowing my whole body.
But this time, an irregular situation had occurred where Baek Ji-hyuk left and I came in to take his place, so couldn't the debut date get pushed back?
Debuts getting delayed for all sorts of reasons happened often at any agency.
The moment I held that small hope, a not-so-welcome guest appeared before my eyes again.
[Breaking] PLUTO's 'Debut Canceled' at Last After Schedule Keeps Getting Delayed
The debut of Solar Entertainment's rookie boy group 'PLUTO' has finally been canceled.
'PLUTO' is the boy group Solar Entertainment—called the success legend of small agencies through Colorize's success—was set to unveil based on that know-how.
However, the sudden departure from the agency of trainee 'Baek Ji-hyuk,' who had been mentioned as part of the final debut team, set off emergency lights inside Solar Entertainment. In the end, agency officials stated that 'debuting as originally planned has become difficult' and revealed that, after discussion, the debut plan had been canceled.
Meanwhile, it was also made known that Mr. Pyeong, formerly a trainee at Solar Entertainment, took his own life in despair over his circumstances after the debut was canceled, drawing much sympathy.
'Mr. Pyeong,' of all things. Now it won't even write my name properly.
Okay, okay. So if the debut date gets pushed back, it's over? And if I can't debut like that, I die again?
Pyeong Seol-han's life: cheaper than a tire.
Threatening me with death at every turn—what a simpleminded jerk whose life has only 0s and 1s.
Come to think of it, if this were a novel, wouldn't this be something like a 'status window'? Do status windows usually pop up with long text like this?
I've read a few famous web novels too, for trend research, and I remember most of what shows up in them taking a concise approach that only conveys the objective.
For example,
[Urgent] Debut as boy group 'PLUTO' by August this year.
- Penalty for failure: Death
Like that. Don't you know netizens these days won't read anything over three lines?
And if this really is a situation like something out of a fantasy novel, then give me that. A stat-boosting event.
Why won't you give me a secret technique where I level up fast after just a little training? Isn't there anything like my proficiency going up after a few dances, so my dance grade rises from D to C?
Don't tell me there's nothing because I'm being divinely punished? Harsh. So harsh.
As I was diligently trash-talking it to its face in my head, another window rose up beside the [Breaking] window.
[Life Tips] TIPS for a Smart Trainee Life!
(1) Be sure to keep 'this' in mind for trainee life!
① No practicing alone
People without fundamentals need a teacher to check their form is correct. Practicing alone brimming with baseless confidence is a no-no! When practicing individually, be sure to ask the trainees around you for help!
② Fix an irregular daily rhythm
Let's keep up a life of sleeping at night and waking in the morning! All-nighters are bad for your skin and health—absolutely not!
③ Correct inappropriate language habits
A gourd that leaks inside leaks outside too! Starting from your trainee days, cut down on how often you use slang and profanity, and work to develop proper, refined language habits!
============
(2) How can I practice well?
A trainee's growth efficiency differs depending on who teaches them!
Let's go learn from a teacher tailored to help with each practice item!
Dance ▷ Ha Hyun (★Recommended), Namgung Hyun
Vocals (Rap) ▷ Ha Hyun (★Recommended for beginners), Namgung Hyun (★Recommended for intermediate), Seo Seo-jun (※Absolutely forbidden for beginners!)
This bastard, seriously.
It won't give me the stat-boosting event I asked for, and instead it's handing me a school newsletter for parents.
No, but what's that number 2? Where did Cha Min-seong's name go? He doesn't just lack social skills, he can't teach either? He's got it all.
Even Seo Seo-jun, who was at least listed under vocals, had a dismal note in his parentheses.
Seeing that he's forbidden for beginners, he must be no help at all for learning the basics.
I turned my head and looked at the model teacher with two recommendations. Then, when our eyes met, Ha Hyun smiled and came over.
"It's hard, isn't it? The first day's like that for everyone. You're doing well, so don't worry too much, and let's hang in there together for the next class too!"
Indeed, the character of a fine educator worthy of two recommendations.
Is my only choice to prostrate myself flat before Ha Hyun and beg tearfully every self-practice session, if I want to escape my squid-on-a-grill state even a little faster?
Ah, right.
Since the guy's here, I should mention that.
"Ha Hyun."
Ha Hyun, who had been looking back toward the members, turned around with a question on his face.
"Thanks for the potato chips."
I took the ones he bought me that day back to the gosiwon and ate them for dinner. They were salty and good.
Ha Hyun soon caught the meaning of my words and nodded with a bright smile.
Just then, the vocal trainer came in and announced the start of class.
At the same time, Namgung Hyun and Seo Seo-jun, who had crept over, each grabbed one of my arms and pulled me to my feet.
To be exact, they 'tried to pull me to my feet.'
"Heok....... This hyung is too heavy, what do we do......."
"Don't give up, Seo-jun! This is exactly the weight a senior has to bear......!"
They're making a big fuss. Anyone watching would think I was some chunk of iron.
It seemed that if I left them to it, my arms would pop out before I got up, so I just tensed my lower body and got up on my own, and the guys made proud faces as if they'd accomplished something.
"We were a help, right?!"
Help, my foot. So confident, when you were trying to wreck my shoulders.
Instead of answering, I finished my revenge by roughly ruffling their hair.