The rain fell in sheets, and the water droplets clinging to the glass were crystal clear. They hung full and heavy, ready to fall. With a light touch of rain from above, they traced paths down the pane and vanished.
With a soft patter, Lu Huai squeezed his eyes shut. His long lashes drooped heavily, trembling like ripples caused by a raindrop falling into a lake.
The damp air clung to his bones, spreading a chill before he even realized it. He curled his fingertips slightly, his brow furrowed, as if his memories too were clinging to this cold dampness, drifting toward a place shrouded in haze.
Patter.
Another sound followed.
Fang Qiming’s hoarse cries of “diary” and “videotape” still rang in his ears, tearing apart the calm facade Lu Huai held within.
Lu Huai opened his eyes. Beneath his dark pupils, he saw the same confused, decadent rainy scene as he had years ago.
.
The tip of his pen glided across the paper, leaving a final answer.
Lu Huai scanned the exam paper from top to bottom with light-colored pupils. He capped his pen with one hand, but the commotion outside grew louder.
He removed one earphone; the classroom was empty. The paper lay on the desk, and Lu Huai leaned back in his chair with a lazy air, his nerves, which had been tight from concentration, finally relaxing. He sipped some water, and the sounds of the outside world now reached his ears without hindrance.
The noisy chatter, mixed with the sound of the rain, was a bit loud.
A flash of helplessness crossed Lu Huai’s eyes. He hooked his fingertip around the white earphone wire, but his movements froze when he heard what was being said next.
“Do you know about Chi Yuan from Class One?”
Chi Yuan.
Lu Huai’s lips straightened abruptly. He looked out the window, his indifferent gaze holding a hint of restlessness. At this time, even if a teacher had called Chi Yuan for a talk, he should have returned by now.
The whispering that he assumed was private passed through the walls, once again buzzing with precision against his eardrums.
“Him? Is he the one who was confessed to by a guy just now? I heard the person who was rejected is threatening to die if he does not agree.” The girl’s voice was sharp, her tone filled with ridicule.
It was normal; the awkward situations in other people’s lives were always just a distraction from the boredom of one’s own existence.
Lu Huai lowered his eyes. The overhead lights cast a shadow over him. His lashes trembled with unease, but his expression remained as indifferent as usual. No emotion could be seen, yet his face turned slightly away, revealing that he was not as unconcerned as he appeared on the surface.
“He is not threatening to die; he was really making a scene on the roof earlier.” It was a boy’s voice, but it was sharper than the girl’s he had been speaking with earlier, and it carried a mean-spirited, nasty edge. “I really do not understand how gay people can be so blatant, but that Chi Yuan is also…”
Bang!
“Damn it!”
With a sudden, thunderous crash, the two instinctively shouted in anger, abruptly ending their conversation.
“What the hell was that noise?”
Lu Huai withdrew his hand coldly. He kicked the desk, which had been knocked over against the wall by the impact, out of the way, and walked out of the door with long strides.
“It was the noise I made.” He lifted his eyes slightly, his gaze cold and indifferent. “Do you have an opinion?”
The boy who had been gossiping had a flat-top haircut; his features were not bad individually, but combined, they looked inexplicably awkward. Coupled with that gloomy, creepy gaze, it reminded one of the eyes of a rat in a sewer, cowardly yet matched with a detestable mouth.
Lu Huai watched the boy freeze and curled his lips slightly. His entire aura was like piercing snow, sharp enough that one dared not look him in the eye.
He walked toward the man, his tone devoid of any kindness. “Can you repeat what you just said?”
“I, I, I…” Perhaps Lu Huai’s presence was too overwhelming. The boy panicked and avoided his gaze, feeling he had spoken out of turn, yet he still could not understand.
Although he was in the same class as Chi Yuan and Lu Huai, he had little contact with either of them. Compared to Lu Huai, who seemed harder to provoke, Chi Yuan, who had a stronger presence in class, was easier to resent.
A flash of suspicion crossed the boy’s eyes. Is Lu Huai not at odds with Chi Yuan? So what is Lu Huai doing now? He only insulted Chi Yuan a few times; why is Lu Huai being so aggressive?
“I want you to repeat it.”
Lu Huai’s tone was extremely flat, his dark pupils devoid of emotion. He stared at the man with a silent sense of coercion.
The scene was as tense as a spring; even silence felt like it would cause it to collapse.
Rain began to pour down, drenching the buildings and the people. The atmosphere was somber and stifling in its strangeness.
Lu Huai stopped and did not approach further.
“Can someone like you truly stand so high and judge others so casually?”
His voice was so low it was hard to hear. Lu Huai’s eyelashes drooped, shielding a hint of self-mockery.
The wind blew his bangs aside, clearing his view of the sky. He turned around, his white school uniform splashed with rain, bringing a refreshing chill. Today was truly a bad day for everything.
He returned to the classroom.
His desk had been shattered into two halves, exposing what was inside.
Filled with supplementary study materials that propped up the skeleton of his desk, it was barely held together in a box shape. Lu Huai knelt down slowly. The exertion of slamming the desk had caused a persistent, unbearable ache in his lower back. Lu Huai frowned, leaning against the side of the desk, his fingertips reaching out cautiously toward the crack.
He pulled out a box from the side.
The box was not flashy; it looked more like a wooden casket. Held in his fair, slender fingers, it was handled with total, cherished care.
Lu Huai let out a soft breath.
His plans seemed to have been completely disrupted again.
Even though he knew perfectly well that it would not succeed.
He had always been steady in his affairs, much like how he had expected his own failure.
Lu Huai opened the wooden box. Inside was a yellowed notebook and a videotape. The tape was nothing surprising, just scenes of sprawling mountains and boundless oceans, holding countless metaphors and his expectations. By comparison, the diary inside the notebook was much more straightforward.
Why choose today?
Lu Huai stared at the last page of the notebook, rubbing it, suddenly wanting to retreat. Perhaps it was because he had just heard Chi Yuan’s rejection, or perhaps it was because the timing had deviated from what he considered the best moment, and now they were moving in opposite directions.
Lu Huai put the wooden casket away, lowered his eyes, and tidied the scattered books, stacking them in his arms.
Then, he heard footsteps behind him.
Step by step.
“Lu Huai?” Chi Yuan squinted slightly, feeling a bit uneasy. The incident of being confessed to in public had stirred up rumors, and he did not want Lu Huai to know. Yet, the moment he stepped into the classroom, he saw this person crouching on the floor.
“Yes.” Lu Huai answered vaguely. His fingers gripped the spine of the book so hard his fingertips turned white. He pursed his lips, wanting to walk past the other man.
Seeing Lu Huai’s form pause for a second, almost stagnating, and catching sight of the precariously stacked books, Chi Yuan reached out to help instinctively, but the other man moved past him without a word.
The hour hand pointed exactly to the center; two hours had passed since school let out.
Lu Huai finished packing his books. He lowered his eyes to the wooden casket, pressed his tongue against the roof of his mouth, and tucked it into his bag.
Chi Yuan was wrapped in dampness, his deep-set features looking exquisite in the humid atmosphere.
At this moment, he fixed his phoenix eyes on Lu Huai, frowning impatiently. “Why is your desk like that?”
Lu Huai smoothed out the wrinkles in his clothes, his fingertips straightening the fabric as if clearing away the chaotic and complex emotions. He should have replied, “What business is it of yours?” with a rational, biting tone. But he was so exhausted now that he could only shake his head, unwilling to say a single word.
“As the class monitor…”
“So what if you are the class monitor?” Lu Huai interrupted him directly, his clear voice making every word resonate. A sneer touched his brows and eyes. “Are you also responsible for your classmates’ emotional states?”
The tension of the sky met the force of the pouring rain, creating an empty echo between heaven and earth.
At that moment, the sound of thunder and rain reached their ears simultaneously.
Lu Huai felt Chi Yuan’s gaze turn cold instantly. He met it without retreating or avoiding it, though the stiffness in his lower back now throbbed with a dull ache, forcing him to support himself against the desk.
“Lu Huai, what do you mean by that?” Chi Yuan clenched his fists and asked coldly. “Even if you want to mock me over this, there should be a limit, right?”
“Mock?” Lu Huai rolled the word on his tongue and between his teeth, then suddenly let out a dry laugh. “Yes, it is mockery.”
He lifted his head, his eyes scattered with fine, silvery light, shimmering brightly. “So that is your assessment of me…”
“You…” Chi Yuan sensed something was wrong. He stopped himself, irritable. “Otherwise…”
He had been following the student council to register students that afternoon when a boy had suddenly rushed out to confess his love. There was a group of students leaving school, all eager to watch the fun. The boy’s unorthodox behavior in the public eye had caused the flowing crowd to spontaneously surround them.
Chi Yuan had no prejudice against the gay community, but he hated being treated like a monkey in a cage or becoming gossip fodder.
Not wanting the other party to make a fool of himself in front of so many people, Chi Yuan had used the gentlest tone possible to express his apologies with decorum.
However, the situation that followed was so chaotic he could not have predicted it.
After the person who confessed to him ran off with his head down and the crowd dispersed, screams suddenly rang out.
Everyone looked up and saw that person standing on the top floor. With the strong wind and heavy rain, he looked even more precarious.
It had only happened two hours ago, yet Chi Yuan was still trapped in that scene, the gloomy sky and the frenzied crowd.
It made every detail clear, creating a desire to vomit in the overexposed scenario.
Even if he did not want to admit it, all this complexity fell silent the moment he caught sight of Lu Huai.
Perhaps when people are panicked and at a loss, they subconsciously seek out someone more familiar around them. So, even he wanted to seek some comfort from Lu Huai.
But maybe he was wrong. Chi Yuan lifted his eyes to look at Lu Huai’s expression, pressed his lips into a thin line, let out a very light, mocking laugh, and turned away.