* * *
Cha Gil-Do sometimes recalled the restaurant mural. He had never before seen anything that captured his gaze so strongly.
To Cha Gil-Do, Baek Eun-Seong was a kind of human he had never encountered. He looked like he was frightened of him, and yet spoke out of turn. Even while confined, he laughed often enough.
Was he lacking something, or did he simply have no sense of danger?
Dissociative Identity Disorder.
They had said that the original, primary personality of Baek Eun-Seong had disappeared. Perhaps that was why this current Baek Eun-Seong did things the old Baek Eun-Seong never would have. Cha Gil-Do found himself curious about this personality.
‘He said his name was Kim Dong-Yoon.’
Even the name was so typically him.
‘Aren’t you curious what kind of human you were?’
‘I roughly know.’
That was unexpected. He hadn’t thought he was capable of thought at all.
‘Trash.’
‘…….’
‘Am I wrong?’
‘Accurate.’
As the boy said, in the past, the most fitting word for Baek Eun-Seong was “trash.” He hadn’t expected him to speak it so plainly.
If it was in this direction, maybe it was better he had severed himself from the primary personality.
So he had asked. What kind of human was this personality, and what thoughts did he have?
‘What kind of human is Kim Dong-Yoon.’
He couldn’t answer right away. He seemed to mull it over, and finally spoke slowly.
‘…Trash.’
That answer stirred an unspeakable displeasure in Cha Gil-Do. Why did he consider Baek Eun-Seong and Kim Dong-Yoon both the same trash?
‘Because I have no value.’
‘What kind of value.’
‘Mm… the value of living?’
Cha Gil-Do’s heart pounded painfully. His head throbbed. The fury from this unexplained pain made him unbearable. He gripped Kim Dong-Yoon tightly, afraid he would vanish from sight. He knew it hurt him, but he couldn’t let go. If he did, he might never grasp him again.
He wanted to demand right then and there why he wanted so badly to die. Maybe hearing the reason would ease this suffocating frustration.
‘Secondary personalities are self-destructive….’
The phrase the psychiatrist had emphasized rose naturally in his mind. Cha Gil-Do did not want to speak further of the ever-ephemeral “Kim Dong-Yoon.”
‘Let’s stop this talk.’
This boy was Baek Eun-Seong.
The worst among the scum who had committed every kind of evil. And so Cha Gil-Do could not allow Baek Eun-Seong to flee from him in this way.
Yes, that was the reason he could not let go.
At work, where he never allowed even the smallest personal matter to be discussed, one phrase spilled constantly from Cha Gil-Do’s lips.
“What is Baek Eun-Seong doing?”
Ever since Baek Eun-Seong had said he had no value to live, Cha Gil-Do had received close reports of his every action. He never once thought it excessive. He thought it only natural—after all, he had confined him. He didn’t realize it was his own delusion.
As he looked through his papers without breaking form, Cha Gil-Do asked.
“What is Baek Eun-Seong doing?”
The chief secretary answered.
“He is in his room.”
At that, Cha Gil-Do asked nothing further and returned his eyes to the documents. At first, the secretary had been flustered by the question, but now he was used to it. He thought his boss was calculating, not emotional—keeping Baek Eun-Seong confined for some purpose, and requiring reports. It wouldn’t take long before he realized how wrong that assumption was.
“What is Baek Eun-Seong doing?”
The same tone, the same question.
He asked it right before entering the meeting room. The secretary had already heard and answered that question six times just that morning. The intervals between questions were shortening too, from every two hours to less. And every time, the answer was the same.
“He is in his room.”
Again Cha Gil-Do did not press further, but his brow creased slightly. The secretary noticed immediately, but before he could react, Cha Gil-Do strode into the meeting.
The secretary quickly adjusted, shortening the reporting interval to one hour. This sort of handling was his secret to fast promotions and long tenure.
After the one-hour meeting, Cha Gil-Do left without a glance back. The executives, who had been stripped of their very souls by his sharpness, didn’t gather their broken pride and shuffle back to their seats until long after he was gone.
The secretary kept his wits about him and hurried to keep pace with Cha Gil-Do’s long strides, practically speed-walking.
“How is the UCK acquisition?”
“With the dismissal of CEO Kwon, all shares have been secured.”
Entering his office, Cha Gil-Do sat and asked while reviewing data.
“The nano process.”
“Last year’s first half, we preemptively transitioned to the third-generation 4-nanometer process produced in Taiwan, allowing us to push into niche markets. This is expected to help us secure large foundry orders in the second half, regaining ground we had lost. Additionally…”
As the secretary answered fluently, Cha Gil-Do nodded, satisfied. The secretary felt pride, bracing for more questions. Then Cha Gil-Do suddenly struck from the side.
“What is Baek Eun-Seong doing?”
“Through foundry positioning, we are—pardon?”
The secretary froze, unable to block or dodge. He had been giving a serious business report, and suddenly the question had swerved back to Baek Eun-Seong.
“……”
Cha Gil-Do lifted his gaze from the materials and fixed him with a look. The secretary, sensing doom if he delayed, hurriedly checked his device and replied.
“H-he is in his room.”
“His room?”
Cha Gil-Do frowned, displeased with the answer.
“Yes. He ate lunch in his room and has just fallen asleep.”
“Didn’t you also say two hours ago he was in his room?”
“…Three hours ago, too, he was in his room.”
Baek Eun-Seong’s movements were so limited that reporting them hourly was pointless. Other than eating and relieving himself in the attached bathroom, he never left the room—not even to the living room.
Cha Gil-Do, suspecting he was plotting something in there, asked again.
“What exactly is he doing in that room?”
The flood of questions left the secretary no time to wipe his cold sweat. Was this why he had never asked before, only to barrage him all at once now? The secretary wondered gloomily if it was time to draft a resignation letter. He answered weakly.
“…Sleeping.”
“What?”
“All he does is sleep.”
Cha Gil-Do stared at him, incredulous. But there was nothing more to report. Aside from eating and excreting, Baek Eun-Seong never left the bed.
Cha Gil-Do, who had never cared for mental health before, finally realized Baek Eun-Seong’s condition was not normal.
“Tell Dr. Seo to come to my office.”
This was the psychiatrist who had diagnosed Baek Eun-Seong’s Dissociative Identity Disorder.
Soon Dr. Seo entered. As if expecting this day would come, he spoke without hesitation.
“Classic stress-induced depression. In addition to medication, environmental improvement is necessary.”
Cha Gil-Do sneered.
“Ridiculous. I spared his life, isn’t that enough? Why should I care about that.”
“The onset of depression means his sense of loss from restrictions is a likely cause.”
“So what.”
He should have killed him long ago. He hadn’t, he had only confined him—so what if there was a sense of loss? Cha Gil-Do leaned back, his expression sour, showing he disliked the lecture. But Dr. Seo was a capable psychiatrist.
Cha Gil-Do had already taken Baek Eun-Seong out—to see cherry blossoms, to the restaurant—but he didn’t consider that. It had not been calculation, but actions for Baek Eun-Seong’s sake alone. Not even he realized it, and no one else knew.
Dr. Seo, ignorant of this, said,
“The loss of freedom will lead to self-loathing and abuse.”
He spoke directly, like a warning.
“In the end, he will try to destroy himself.”
If this did not stop, he would lose him.
Even the faint smirk on Cha Gil-Do’s lips vanished. He had already seen firsthand how self-loathing turned destructive—when Baek Eun-Seong had slashed his own wrist with broken glass, forcing all the tableware to be replaced with plastic.
Sending the doctor away, Cha Gil-Do sank into thought.
Medication was obvious, but the environmental improvement weighed on him. Dr. Seo had said Baek Eun-Seong needed freedom. But Cha Gil-Do had no intention of releasing him. He had confined him precisely to keep him out of society.
And…
‘If I let him go, he’ll only make trouble.’
He didn’t even eat properly on his own. Set him free, and he’d die young. That was why Baek Eun-Seong had to remain within his reach. Release was impossible, but leaving him cooped up was no good either. He needed to be dragged out somewhere.
‘A movie theater…? No, too many people.’
For the same reason, amusement parks were out. Clubs, where his original personality often went, weren’t even considered.
Excluding crowded places left few options. Then he wondered if he needed to send him outside at all.
He seemed to like flowers. Another cherry blossom viewing? Better yet, build a garden.
‘A greenhouse would be best.’
Plant cherry trees everywhere he walked, so when spring came he wouldn’t need to go far for blossoms. But that was long-term, not an immediate change of pace.
Cha Gil-Do fell back into thought.
“Where should I take him…”
“What about the new gallery that just opened?”
The secretary, overhearing his murmur, answered quickly. Cha Gil-Do raised his eyes to him, and for the first time in a while, he smiled faintly, nodding in satisfaction.