Ji An had been busy with work lately, always needing to stay late.
“Ji An, working late again tonight?”
His colleague, Xun Yi, packed up his bag and patted the back of Ji An’s chair as he walked by.
“Yeah.” Ji An’s eyes were dry from revising the blueprints. Seeing that the office was empty except for the two of them, he asked, “Everyone left so early? Did the sun rise in the west today?”
Xun Yi explained, “The weather forecast said there’d be a heavy snowstorm tonight. The snow’s already pretty thick. You should head home soon, or you won’t be able to leave later.”
“Alright, I got it.”
After Xun Yi left, Ji An casually opened his messaging app and sent a message to a chat labeled with a little dog emoji.
「Pick me up.」
His home was just a few blocks from the office, so he usually didn’t drive to work.
Once he finished everything, he was distracted by the howling wind outside, sounding like a wailing ghost. He shut down his computer, cradled a cup of hot tea, and slowly drank it by the window.
The snow fell like a sudden downpour, piling up thickly on the ground.
The streets were deserted.
He turned off the lights and checked his phone in the elevator. You Fu hadn’t replied.
Feeling a bit irritated, the elevator doors opened slowly, and the cold, damp air made him shiver.
At the entrance stood a snow-covered boy. Snowflakes were slowly melting on his black jacket, and his slightly damp, frozen hair was pushed back, revealing sharp eyes and eyebrows. A trail of wet snow extended from the doorway to his feet.
He held a thermos and an umbrella.
The sight of the drenched boy cheered Ji An up. Feigning ignorance, he asked, “Oh, what happened?”
“The wind was strong, and the umbrella broke.”
You Fu stepped into the elevator and pressed the button for the design department floor.
Ji An said, “I want to go home.”
“You can’t. The snow’s too heavy outside.”
“Then what’s the point of you coming here?”
“To bring you food.”
The design department had a dedicated rest area.
You Fu set the meal in front of Ji An and handed him chopsticks.
Ji An took the chopsticks, rolling his eyes disdainfully. “Your arm just brushed against me. It’s a bit wet. Take off your clothes and dry them on the heater.”
As Ji An ate, You Fu rustled around behind him, wearing only a thin undershirt. He carefully wiped the spot on Ji An’s wrist where his arm had touched.
Ji An noticed how wet You Fu’s pants were. “Why not take off your pants?”
“I’m not an exhibitionist.”
Ji An imagined You Fu parading around in his underwear and shuddered at the thought. He didn’t care if he took them off or not.
After eating, You Fu washed the thermos and lay down on the sofa to sleep.
Ji An sat on another sofa, playing on his phone. They didn’t talk much, just like at home.
Ji An wasn’t sleepy, so he kept playing on his phone. After some time, the room plunged into darkness as the power went out.
Ji An finally lifted his head.
The wind howled even louder outside. It was two in the morning, and the power was out.
“Hey, get me some water.” Ji An called out to You Fu twice but got no response. He got up to wake him, but when his fingers touched You Fu’s skin, it was burning hot.
In the flashlight beam, You Fu was curled up on the sofa, shivering. His half-wet hair clung to his forehead, and his lips were frighteningly pale.
It seemed he had caught a cold and developed a fever.
Ji An showed no concern. It was just a fever; it wouldn’t kill him.
He returned to his seat and played on his phone for a while longer. Then he remembered the small blanket at his workstation and tossed it over You Fu.
You Fu clutched the thin blanket like a lifeline, curling up tightly.
His mind felt like it was being pried open, knives stirring his brain, saws severing his nerves.
Though his skin was hot, he shivered from the cold. Reality and dreams blurred together, as if he were being submerged in cold water, a large hand pressing his forehead, dunking him beneath the surface and pulling him back up, alternating between suffocation and breath.
Fear and helplessness overwhelmed him.
He remembered another dark night, not snowy but rainy.
Lightning crawled across the night sky, tearing it open and pouring rain down, causing water to splash up from the ground.
Inside, little You Fu lay on the windowsill, tracing raindrops down the glass with his fingers, pouting and ignoring the boy softly coaxing him beside him.
“Brother promised to buy me chocolate after school. I hate Brother.”
You Xia guiltily tried to ruffle his hair, but You Fu turned his head away.
You Xia’s hand hovered in the air for a long time before slowly lowering in the window’s reflection. “Little Fu, Brother was wrong. How about I go buy it for you now?”
You Fu finally looked up at him, but for some reason, You Xia’s face was shrouded in a dark mist, obscuring his features.
You Fu asked, “Can I go with Brother?”
“It’s raining, and you just recovered from a cold. Brother will go alone.” You Xia cupped his face, gently shaking it, coaxing, “Listen to Brother.”
That night, with the rain pouring down, You Fu played video games alone at home. But Brother was gone for too long, long enough for him to fear the thunder, long enough for the lightning to seem like a beast ready to devour him.
He remembered the story his father told him, about a long-haired ghost appearing on rainy nights, one that loved to eat tender-skinned children.
He regretted letting Brother go out in the rain to buy chocolate.
Crash—thunder boomed in his ears, and he shivered, his unease growing stronger.
The words “Listen to Brother” were long forgotten.
He took a small umbrella and went out to find Brother.
Raindrops pelted the ground like bullets, the rainy night so chaotic he couldn’t distinguish between sky and earth, couldn’t see his surroundings. He ran to the nearest small supermarket, guided by memory.
At the intersection, he recognized the green light across the street. Just as he was about to cross, blinding white light and the screech of brakes rushed toward him.
Instinctively, You Fu raised his arm to shield his face, hearing only Brother’s scream: “You Fu!”
He was knocked to the ground by a force.
Bang!
He sat on the ground, the umbrella beside him, rain soaking him instantly. His pupils trembled, reflecting a sea of blood red, chocolates and candies scattered in the crimson, and not far away, You Xia lay on the ground. The dark mist on his face slowly faded, revealing wide, vacant eyes, pupils gradually diluting.
His heart-wrenching cries tore through the downpour: “Brother!!!”
……
The driver who ran the red light fled the scene. That rainy night became a nightmare that still woke You Fu in terror.
“Brother…”
Listen to Brother.
“I’ll listen to Brother from now on…”
From now on, I’ll smooth away all my edges, strip away all my temper, discard all my willfulness.
I’ll listen to Brother completely.
Even if it means kneeling, even if it means insults, even if it means beatings, even if it means orders and mockery.
I’ll accept it all, become the most obedient person.
Even if, in your eyes, I’m not even considered a person.
“Brother…” His brow furrowed tighter, choking out the word again and again, “Brother…”
“Are you dead? I told you to get up and take your medicine.” Apparently finding it too troublesome to talk to the current You Fu, Ji An, having lost patience, yanked him up by his hair.
The pain from his scalp brought You Fu back to his senses a little. A small pill was shoved into his mouth, followed by a cup of cold water.
The water trickled down his chin, dripping onto the thin blanket.
He coughed and swallowed, and Ji An tossed him back onto the sofa. “What’s with all the ‘Brother, Brother’? It sounds so disgusting. Why are you calling me when you have a fever? If it weren’t for that ten million, I wouldn’t care if you lived or died.”
You Fu lay on the sofa, fingers curling tightly around the thin blanket.
How could he forget? He no longer had a brother.
All he had was a crude substitute.
……
Morning.
The snowstorm had stopped, along with the ghostly howling wind.
Snowplows worked on the roads, clearing paths.
When You Fu woke, his head still felt a bit heavy. His vision slowly focused, settling on Ji An, asleep on the opposite sofa.
Ji An was clearly exhausted, faint dark circles under his eyes.
You Fu’s body was no longer cold and wet. He pulled off the thin blanket and found himself wearing a jacket, with Ji An’s wool coat draped over him, buttons fastened haphazardly.
His wet pants had been removed and left on the heater.
He put on his pants and gently covered Ji An with the wool coat.
Ji An’s sleep was light. Hearing movement, he opened his eyes, meeting You Fu’s gaze for a couple of seconds, then ordered, “Lower your head.”
He placed his palm on You Fu’s forehead, confirming it was cool, then closed his eyes again. “Get lost.”
You Fu’s gaze lingered on his face. When Ji An frowned and opened his eyes, You Fu looked away, picked up the thermos from the table, and left.
Last night, Ji An had tossed and turned on the sofa, unable to sleep. In the latter half of the night, You Fu’s murmurs of “Brother” grew louder. With no other choice, Ji An pulled up a chair to sit beside him, patting his back perfunctorily. “I’m here, stop calling.”
You Fu said he was cold.
Ji An cursed, “You’re pushing it,” and removed his wet pants, grabbing the dried jacket and his own coat to haphazardly dress him.
You Fu clutched his hand.
Ji An tried to pull his hand away, but halfway through, You Fu clasped it tightly with both hands, murmuring, “Don’t go.”
Ji An felt a wave of discomfort in his stomach, slowly prying You Fu’s hands off. You Fu slipped back into his murmuring dreams, shivering and mumbling incessantly.
So noisy.
Ji An reluctantly put his hand back, softening his voice. “Brother’s not leaving. Brother’s here.”
You Fu clung to his hand like a lifeline, refusing to let go.
He wanted to feel You Fu’s forehead for temperature, but it ended up with You Fu resting his head on Ji An’s palm, sleeping.
Ji An tucked the blanket around him, giving him water, forced to watch over him all night until You Fu’s feverish heat dissipated, allowing Ji An a brief rest.
He slowly withdrew his hand, preparing to leave.
The night was so dark, he thought he saw a smile at the corner of You Fu’s mouth.
He looked closely, but the mouth remained straight.
He must have been mistaken.